Whoami3

I am not that young. I am 34 years old Ok, So I will try to build mediation habit first. I already did 10 minutes of focusing on breath today. Although I have little hope of keeping this habit, just as I have given up other habits in the past.

@Aaron p hmm, it might be kind of like you said - I don't have clear intention. Usually during the trip I just sit and observe what happens. Sometimes I also contemplate on problems that I have in life (lack of motivation in job, low self-esteem, lack of discipline in eating and exercising, non-existing romantic relationships) or go for a walk. I often get bored and then I do something on computer like watching YouTube (It is my big addiction). Sometimes in the peak of the trip when I sit for too long I observe my thoughts going in some scary direction and learned by my past negative experiences I change something, I move to another room or go to watch something on computer. Why am I doing it (taking psychedelics)? I think I expect that during the trip some insight will come up that will help me solve my problems, but to be fair another big reason is also for fun and to experience something beautiful.

Thanks for your long reply. I only have access to some 1p-lsd and maybe shrooms in future. I know about some therapy center in my country that uses ketamine but they require to have proof that you were already treated with some "classic" drugs like ssri's and they didn't help. I don't even think I am depressed and should take those drugs. Might doing some spiritual work like meditation help? Many years ago when I first watched actualised.org I was quite serious about it and meditated every day but lost motivation after few months, maybe a year when I realised nothing is really changing. I was doing "do nothing" technique. Maybe I was doing it wrong or maybe I should do some focus-based technique.

I've had 15-20 trips on LSD analogs over past years. These were mostly low to medium doses. Experiences were usually positive, but it happened 2–3 times that I was scared and went into a negative thought loop for a short time. I mostly did trips alone in my apartment, few times with some friends - I felt more safe there so I took higher doses and had much richer experiences (mainly visual or other senses. I was never anywhere near ego death). The best experience I had, was when I was in nature and everything felt so beautiful and magical, but still I don't think it changed me in any way. Now I am at the point that taking a low dose of LSD makes no sense for me because it's neither entertaining nor beneficial for self-help. I could take high dose to have some life-transforming experience, but I am afraid of some outcomes of bad trip. Even if I do it in a safe place with good set and settings, I could get crazy, do something stupid or be left with some long-lasting trauma or psychosis afterward. At this moment, I don't have option to have a trip sitter. How to prepare to mitigate the negative consequences of a potential bad trip?

How to get passionate about spirituality? Few years ago when I watched Leo's video about meditation I was really motivated and I thought I will have all those "magic" benefits of doing practice. I was meditating consistently every day for few months 30-60 min a day. I didn't see many effects and I started to slack off, skipping days, not meditating for weeks, months even. Now I do it here and there for 10-15 mins

@Dan Arnautu I am 26 years old and I have never had any initimate relationship with girl. I am shy around girls and can't imagine myself having a girlfriend. Being affectionate or behaving flirtatious - it's not me.

@Truth Haha. After seeing thread title I new someone is going to post this video

Is it easier to reach access concentration while on LSD?

@deadforever I heard it's not yet released on android

Why shrooms? I live in Poland. I finally discovered that it's easy to buy legal LSD analogs (ALD-52, 1P-LSD, AL-LAD, ETH-LAD) from online research chemicals shop.

How should I prepare?

I wanted to share my experience. Today I took about 130 mg of ald-52. It felt stronger than than my previous al-lad trip. Maybe after about 30 min my skin started to be more sensitive. After 90 min: I had different visual hallucinations. It was quite easy at the beginning and I was thinking about taking another dose of substance. (Thank God I didn't do that!!)) Visuals were getting stronger and stronger. Floor was breathing. I still was handling all this. Whole time I was just sitting/walking in the room and observing experience. about 2h: I was thinking about existence, free will, thinking. I felt like I was slowly losing my mind. At some point I started panicking. I felt emerging self-perpetuaiting fear. I lay dawn on bed. I was seeing some patterns on the ceiling. I tryied to go with the expierience and not fight against it. I calmed down a little bit. After that for the next 2hours I was trying get my mind busy with anything: I was playing video games, watching stupid funny youtube videos. I was afraid to observe reality because I thought it may make trip very bad and scary. I was running away from reality. So after 2-3h hours of doing some shit I finally sit in silence and everything was managable. Visuals were still quite strong but I wasn't so mindfucked. I think I'll have some break from psychedelics

I think you can! I experienced it many times. I was just sitting, doing nothing. I was lost in thoughts and I was not aware of that.

During watching demo I was pausing every few seconds to read Leo's insights. These notes are so powerful. It would be wonderful If he could share to the public at least some part of his journal

Poland