OBEler

Hello, I really get nervous once I decide to trip again. Even on low doses like 70 microgram LSD. I tripped over 15 times and after the first 4 trips I had one "bad trip" on too much lsd. After this needed a break for over one years. Then I got slowly back again, taking psychedelics regulary once per month. The fear is always in the background. It is like "Why am I doing this?". It is like a burden for me...Oh no one month is over, time for tripping again. I dont want this. But I do it anyway, against fear. On the one side I wish a breakthrough experience which brings me on the next level on spirituality. On the other side, I feel scary to have this experience. Will this be too much? Will I never see reality for what it is? I fear infinity, I fear to find out that there is no death. When I sit in silence during trips I always feel like something strange can happen from one second to the next and this will blow my mind forever. Do mystical experiences really feel like suddenly you will hit by a train? Or can it also feel total normal. I have very much respect for every little trip I have and am always nervous. After the peak is over I am happy that the trip will come to an end. Is this normal?

Enlightenment is the complete opposite of DPDR, Shinzen Young also made a topic about this (he called it the evil twin). It is very easy to think that Enlightenment is like DPDR but that just comes from those simple minded persons who never were enlightened and never had DPDR.

@VerballyHazardous top video thank you!

@gk9872 I read the whole thread again from God Perspektive. I think I got a Taste how consciousness works. It is like a force which fluidly shapes here all Things and the Material is itself, consciousness. I would say from human pov it is exact opposite of solipsism. IT is a little Tricky if you have no mystical experience at All. Hang in there, time will show you

@Leo GuraCan you clarify this? I ask me too When you talk about "you imagined this and that" I dont know if you are talking from God POV or limited human form POV. Last would be solipsism. There was a time when you always made it clear from which perspective you talk. Maybe you changed a lot. Are you from now on per default talking from Gods POV ? If yes, I can read this whole thread again, lol.

@Inliytened1 I know that it is in my imagination and what I see and experience right now is all there is for limited me. But if we go meta and beyond that god is in leo and sees leos room. Right? Edit: Ok Leo I just can feel there is something too big to grasp in my limited form. I just hope awakening is not what I think right now and is worth in the end.

@Leo Gura you are always talking from the God perspective. I try to talk from the limited human perspective as I know it. I know that at the end everything is God and my whole room is god. Your room is also god. And you are me. But still I can say if I take the limited illusional human perspective there exist two rooms (Leos room and mine room) right now. It is not true at the end because everything is one but from the limited illusional perspective you can say that at least.

@Leo Gura Ok if I understand you correctly you want to say You as God. So this limited figure on the canvas did not create the corona virus, the canvas (absolute God) did it. So the canvas creates a limited figure with other limited figures and corona and they dont know about corona virus and did not create it because they are limited. But god created corona and experiences every little corona virus therefore corona exists outside of limited figures at the same time and it interacts with the figures. Right? Hope I finally got it

You as absolute God? Or you as limited form God with an ego? Please clarify You as absolute God? Or you as limited form God with an ego? Please clarify

@Leo Gura I talk here from limited human form perspective in this relative world: what is when two imaginated people look at the coffee table at the same time, the one from the frontside the other from the backside, the coffee table has then a backside in this moment because one of them is aware of the backside. Correct? And what about the corona virus? this should not exist for me because I as limited human am not aware of it. Therefore it should not be there. But I can still die from it. And what about the internet, no one is aware of it right now but it still functions if you open a website. So there is something behind the scene which I as limited human being am not aware of. Correct?

So a coffee table has a backside because god is omniscient and created this 3D space time object called coffee table and has full access to every little detail (atoms, structure, energy, spirit whatever).. But when I as an imagined person look at a coffee table, I (not God) just imagine the backside of a coffee table. Because I dont have access to the backside of the coffee table with my eyes (I would if I could have x-ray vision). But in fact the backside of a coffee table is still there thanks to God who is omniscient. Did I understood you correctly?

@Galyna the person has the imaginated ability to imagine me back. the chair does not have this imaginated function. thats the difference.

maybe you need to invent a word for conscious imagination. there is too much confusion on this word if you simply say imagination. How about god-imagination or absolute imagination Sadghuru clearly says in one video that reincarnation and karma do not exist. Sadhguru - There is no such thing as your soul. The process of reincarnation https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BlzXhiQa4mk

@Leo Gura you said one time We need a video about this topic. What you are talking about here in this thread sounds just like pure solipsism for me. I can understand that from absolute truth everything is one and therefore god as pure solipsim. But in the relative world where every person is in dual world, how is there solipsim? Of course I imagine everyone but when I talk to someone which I imagine, this person is also imagine me as a person. Am I correct?

@Baotrader You created your own drug? You tested it 100 times in 20 days? you can heal your cat by touching its ass? You are powerful.

@Rodrigo SIlva Exactly! Well done. Lsd can transform your life and thanks to lsd I can see the beauty in so many things during normal life and it stays. Almost nothing is boring for me anymore

Exactly. I ABSOLUTELY understand you. Leo is very good teacher, the one problem with it is when he repeats and repeats in almost EVERY video that all is imaginary. This is brainwashing. He should be careful because you can easily misunderstand him here. He should use sometimes other words, phrases or analogs like spirit, life force, consciousness or whatever. A little variation. But he chooses the scariest word: imaginary. Everything is imaginary. these words will burn in your brain. Why not saying sometimes everything is magic? The problem is, your subconscious mind made a belief about it and then it is hard to change, even through logic. All I can say to you: have faith. That you will come back to reality, it takes just time. You are trapped right now in your beliefs. The final truth will show to you anyway what leo really means by this so keep going. Edit: ok leo has sometimes variations. He says also everything is love/ infinity/ god. Maybe this phrase "Everything is imaginary" I just rememberes the most or he says it lately a little bit more often.

@Rodrigo SIlva I heard from many people that low doses (not microdoses) can be weird. They say you are hanging in between a trip and sober consciousness. You are not fully in a trip, you are between two worlds if you know what I mean. Therefore your ego is very well active and can be afraid. Higher doses will solve this problem. In your case I still would do some more low doses. You mastered 50 mcg, next time it will be a little less wired and so on. Then go up to the next level

@Rodrigo SIlva I know your situation from myself. Good work, that you decided to do it anyway, you have strong will power. This sounds like a good trip in terms of growth, which will help you a lot in your journey. But dont go up. make a break and then do 50 again and again until you can rest in silence with bliss. silence is pure beauty. your ego just hates it For me I also get this claustrophobic silence, and I feel weird. Even music will not stop this. I then concentrate on the breath, that helps

I read that ego death differs depending on which psychedelica you take. Not only on degree but how fast it happens, how long, to what degree and how scary it is for the first time. Which one is better for experiencing ego death for the first time, if someone dont want to be too overwhelmed by it? I heard nitrous oxide gas alone should be giving a taste of ego death for very short time and is ideally for beginners. What do you think?

@acidgoofy you mean I start with 100 mcg and next time 120 mcg and so on until I get a little taste of ego death? Is there really a slowly process to ego death or will it it you like a train when it comes? I really want just a little taste of ego death, just to know what it is like and if I can handle this. Like testing the water. I ask me if this is possible

Hello, I never experienced non duality during a trip. I normally trip with closed eyes. So I ask me if I will recognize non duality with closed eyes and will it be different compared with open eyes? Will non duality shock me if I will experience this for the first time? I am always a little nervous during a trip that from one second to the next I will experience this truth and it will change my life forever.

Can somebody who experienced non duality share his opinion if non duality with closed eyes is differnt than with open eyes?

dont do sun gazing. some people can do this because of eye colours. others get blind forever. please, I researched this stuff well enough and just cannot recommend it.