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So i’ve been practising self-enquiry/observation for a while now. Whilst i’ve made a huge amount of progress since starting earlier last year, i’ve yet to reach a truly genuine state of not-knowing, or even anything close to it. I know that it’s important to get to that level of openness with the enquiry, so i’ll really try to become conscious of the fact that I don’t know what I am. But it’s always a sort of pseudo-not-knowing, a sort of intellectual not-knowing, as opposed to a state of true not-knowing where i’ve got that real conscious traction. So my question is; is this normal? Am I taking the right approach? Is a genuine state of not-knowing something that only happens prior to having a big breakthrough i.e. rare and/or difficult, or is it something that can actually be cultivated each time I sit down to contemplate? Cheers!

This is slightly misleading though, because Ralston didn't start pursuing Enlightenment until he was 21 (according to the Enlightenment Intensive book). I was surprised to read that he reached Enlightenment (on the questions What Am I? and What is Life?) on the Enlightenment Intensives. My impression was that he did it all on his own in solo contemplation. I'm guessing the bulk of his deeper contemplation was done after that?

Oh man i'm so jealous! I'd love to be able to do the Apprentice program. If you get a chance, you should definitely write a couple of blog posts on this forum whilst you're there, talking about your progress etc. I'd love to hear about it. I have a question about the contemplation and communication. How does it differ, if at all, from any other Enlightenment Intensive program? Just wondering because there are a few enlightenment intensives here in the uk, but i'd consider travelling to America if Ralston's were much better.

@Leo Gura A great addition to the site. Thanks for sharing! Definitely looking forward to future updates.

My brother is in first year university and he's also considering whether he wants to stay or not. It's definitely a really tough decision. I didn't enjoy my first year either, but I listened to my intuition and ended up leaving and starting a completely different course at a completely different university. My advice is to trust your intuition. Your intuition is telling you that your current course isn't quite right, and that you want to be doing something else. Your logical mind is telling you that it's a risk to leave and that your better off playing it safe by sticking it out. So whilst you have to consider the practical implications of leaving university, I think you should trust your feelings (as hard as it may be) rather than your logical mind. If you don't want to move back home or work, consider starting a new course? If you're from the UK then this might be an expensive option (as it was for me) but I believe you're allowed 4 years worth of university loans. If you're from a country where the fees aren't an issue then i'd say absolutely change courses. Goodluck!

Wow, this lecture is amazing! Thanks for sharing @Richard Alpert! Just finished watching the whole thing. I'd do anything to have a 5-Meo session with him!

Its done by having two omni-directional microphones pointed away from each other (like ears). This is my favourite:

I'm really interested in going to one of his workshops as well. I live in the UK though, so it's going to be quite difficult for me - and expensive! I asked Leo about this a while back and his response was: " You don't need any prep to do a retreat. Just go with an open mind. I've found that $2000 for a retreat -- any quality retreat -- is worth it. But that's me. I probably have more money to spend than you." I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure the 'contemplation and communication with a partner' is something similar to the techniques used in most enlightenment intensives. Here's some info on that: http://www.enlightenment-intensives.org.uk/technique.html . The process/technique might be slightly different if you were doing the 'Transforming Your Experience of Life Workshop' however. I haven't been to any of his workshops so not 100% sure if what i'm saying is correct. Anyway, hope this helped!

The author explains how to practise concentration meditation in the book. Concentrate on the illusory smoothness and continuity of the breath (as opposed to insight practise where you try to experience the individual sensations that make up the breath). Keep your attention sharply focused on the sensation of your breath leaving and entering your nose, or the rising and falling of your belly. When you're mind wanders (and it will) bring it back to the breath. Do that every day until you can stay focused on atleast a part of every single in and out breath for a whole hour without getting lost in thought. It is possible. Try to stay focused on every single in/out breath for 15 mins at first, and then add more time when you feel like it. Keep doing that until you reach access concentration and then follow the instructions given in the book.

Love the little paradox at the beginning. Wise words indeed!

Best party trick ever!

(This is an “I”-friendly post, so no comments on how many times ‘I’ use “I”!) This is great, thanks for sharing Leo! I was actually quite surprised when I read the "How to actually practise getting enlightened" section. Not in a bad way, but because it is exactly what i've been doing for the past 4 months. I've just been under the impression that it was a form of self-inquiry. Still, there's a lot of interesting stuff here that I haven't been doing. I don't claim to be a pro on this stuff, so take my comments lightly! I can verify Leo's comments on it taking a few months to get your bearings straight. It was only after around 2 months that I really begun to understand and 'get into' the process, even though it seems quite simple on the surface. I’d recommend starting with 30 mins, or even 20 mins if you’ve never done any sort of self-inquiry/observation before. Even though the technique seems quite simple, I’ve definitely noticed a sort of development or progression in the way that i’ve thought about various things. Not sure if it’s meant to be like that? Anyway, I find that you progress and progress and then get completely stuck. You feel confused and frustrated and feel like there’s no way of getting around it. But then eventually you have an insight and you kind of see through it. The insight being some small aspect of how you ‘see’ or ‘observe’ yourself (if that makes sense?), and then the cycle repeats. I should also note that after you've done this for a few months you'll find that after around 30 mins (sometimes less) into the practise, you get into an extremely high level of concentration where it becomes quite easy to stay focused on the observation, with a surprisingly minimal amount of monkey mind. That's what i've found anyway. Doing this sort of practise throughout your day also helps to create a sense of momentum. Get into the habit of doing a couple minutes here and a couple minutes there. Again, just re-stating what Leo has written, the most important thing is direct experience i.e. what is happening in your experience Right Now in this very moment! What are your six senses really telling you?

@Leo Gura Really interesting talk, thanks for sharing! Just got my hands on 10g of mushrooms. Won't be doing the full 10g in one go though haha!

By continuing to question what and who you are, and getting to a point where you truly realise that you don't know. Until then it's all just thought and mind games.

From what i've heard other people saying, it seems that doing some 'lighter' psychedelics first (mushrooms, lsd) is a very good idea. My guess is that if you've never done mushrooms, or even some stimulants like MDMA then using the 5-Meo might be slightly on the dangerous side. Personally I won't be doing 5-Meo until i've experimented with mushrooms and LSD a bit more, which i'm currently doing. That's just me, you might be completely ready for it.

What your doing sounds super interesting, looking forward to hearing more about it! Astral projection is definitely something that i'd like to delve into at some point.

@Cammy I finished my degree earlier this year and then went road tripping in America for two and a half months. There was no way in hell that I was gonna go straight into a job! It was by far one of the best, if not the best, experiences of my life. I highly recommend you do some form of travelling when you finish, even if it's only for a few months. Just by spending a short amount of time in a different culture made me realise how much my lifestyle and outlook on life is influenced by where I live. If you feel like saving your money and doing a bit of work in a different country check out volunteer sites like WWOOF and Workaway.

Leo, am I right in saying that you've been to some of Peter Ralston's retreats? I'm really interested in going to the Insight and Enlightenment Workshop. Would you say that a good amount of solo contemplation/consciousness work is required before thinking about going? I'm also only 24, and from the UK. Would you say that paying nearly £2000 (workshop and flights) is worth it? I can't seem to find much info on the retreats other than on the Cheng Hsin website. Any comments would be much appreciated!

Something like this?

I think the key to self-inquiry is to get to a stage of not-knowing. You really don't know what you are...at all. Get past the "closed-ness of your knowing" as Peter Ralston put it. Truly realise that you don't know what you are and then you can really start to wonder. Don't just look for an 'answer', because you won't get one.

Thanks for sharing all of this man, you're journal is really inspiring! Always look forward to reading it.

I've managed to cut down my internet time quite considerably over the past few months. It's something i'm still working on though. Here my advice: Shutdown all of your social media accounts. You don't have the close the accounts completely, but just delete everything that's on the account (friends, pictures etc). That way theres no reason to go on to them. I did it a few weeks back and its awesome! Social media is the ultimate waste of time unless its being used for a business or to share your creative work or something. At the very least, cut your friends list down to your closest friends (2-5 people). Not sure if this applies to you but I'd also recommend deleting any bookmarks you have on your browser i.e. quick ways to access websites. It sounds simple but i've broken the habit of going on so many stupid websites just by doing that. As far as Youtube goes, cut your subscription list down to like 3-5 people. Again, I cut down my internet usage massively by doing this. I'm not sure I can think of any other suggestions other than just develop the habit of being tough and strict with yourself. Sometimes when I get the urge to go onto the internet, i'll just sit there and observe the feeling without any judgment. That works really well - just being aware. Also try replacing your internet time with something else. Buy a load of books! This has worked great for me. I've replaced a massive chunk of my internet time with reading. Buy e-books! If you want to be productive but not do anything at the same time, listen to audio books - non-fiction of course. A load of the books on Leo's booklist are in audiobook form so check those out. And lastly i'd say that if you are gonna spend lots of time on the internet, spend it wisely! Listen to lectures and talks (i'd recommend people like Terrence McKenna or Alan Watts) about philosophy, spirituality, science etc. Watch documentaries. Read interesting articles. Just cut out all of the TV shows, the random videos on Youtube etc. If you do find yourself on a Youtube binge, watching random stuff that isn't gonna do anything for you, then just be aware of that. Be aware! Notice what you're doing. Stop and 'look' at the situation. There has been so many times where i've caught myself mid-binge and just thought "What the fuck am I doing?", and then gone to read or just sit silently doing nothing. Hope this helps!

I’m currently unemployed, 23 years old, living with parents (who are financially supporting me) and i’m being pressured to join the rat-race (i.e. full time job in London). I finished university earlier this year (Yea, that was a total waste of money!) and then travelled for a few months - that’s why i’m unemployed. Every single part of me doesn’t want to work full time, but obviously I can’t live at home forever and my life purpose as a freelance artist is still very much in its early stages. It just seems like having a full-time job will severely restrict either my life purpose or my consciousness work, both of which are hugely more important than some lame-ass job which I don’t really want. I want to be independent, support myself financially and ultimately move out of my parents place as soon as possible, but it seems as though the full time London job is the only option. It’s like I can’t escape the standard life trajectory (school-university-job-family etc) that my parents are so desperate for me to go into. I was wondering if anyone in these forums is currently working a full-time day job, whilst also pursuing their life purpose and committing to meditation and consciousness work every day? Would be really interested to hear how you deal with it all and/or advice you may have for me.

@Leo Gura Leo are you familiar with Terence McKenna's work? Have you read any of his books on psychedelics?

Thanks for the advice man, really appreciate it!