Chives99

My city in liverpool (UK) does zoom sangha from the zen dojo I attend, I find its more disciplined if your doing it together. its stone water zen

Leo there's only YOU here

My brain is overly logical and i think ive struggled so much as ive tried to model socialisation rather than taking action and just wasted time, looking for the perfect opportunity or the perfect sign. If someone is showing interests after have been chatting for a bit in person I feel now its best just to go for it and message her otherwise she'll get bored. I dont mean it in an overly imposing way just to test the waters and chat. Would be interesting to hear womens opinions on the matter.

Just looking for other styles of how people engage in it, I know theres no ultimate right way, but like to compare. When I've been getting good signals and vibes from a girl and have been chatting, I will slightly cock my head to the side and give and look into her eyes and say something flirtatious, this will usually result in her blushing and looking down coyly. If we're across the room I smile and if she smiles back I increase my smile and we briefly mutually stare at each other.

when it comes to phone texting, texts are for very lite covo as like who texts now a days unless you're like my dad (65) and not in the loop of facebook lol, text to organise a coffee date, coffee is very non committal and if u hit it off u can progress from there, if u get her on facebook u can chat for a bit on their , i'd suggest keeping facebook convo light hearted and fun nothing too serious make her laugh and tap into the authentic. Hope it goes really well for you but, if not then keep your heaad up and get back out there.

I love ambient and drone music, eluvium has always been my one of favs, it just hits you beyond the meaningless of it all

What annoyed me the most about the ww1 is that the generals were sat like 30 miles behind the front line having fancy dinners and wine whilst young brainwashed working class men were spilling their guts because they were all herded like sheep to die for a pointless cause, european wars have always been pointless, you wouldn't see aristocrats sending their sons out too die. Thought it showed the brutal and dehumanising nature of war, they were all just scared little boys really, imagine being in such an environment at 17 being bombed to bits and fighting too the bloody death with the enemy. I thought the final the tank scene was the greatest a man begging for his life as flamethrower men just incinerated him was hard to stomach and believe and the man being squashed by the tank like he was an insect, makes you so disappointed in human nature, we can do better. Suppose its easy for me to say that with my 21st century perspective.

I'm experiencing majour ambivalence in regards to developing masculinity , in that In order to be tough and attractive I have to loose my sensitivity and tolerance towards others and fear of being too overly dominant and controlling. Getting rid of that makes me feel like im breaking with integrity, which feels awful for me as being out of integrity makes me feel incomplete and that I'm hurting myself as other people are 'me' , but at the same time survival goes on and I can act dominant and strong to be attractive but in doing so I feel like harming other peoples survival agendas which again makes me feel like im breaking with integrity. Spirituality makes me want to be soft and warm and compassionate, but then at the same time my desire to become attractive makes me want to flip a that and be hard, selfish and stand offish. I can't do both its an impossibility, my brain is fried from this acid trip and I don't know how to reconcile all this, either be a brute or be a doormat.

how about not going with a girl that plays games, find someone that likes you, someone that plays games will probably cheat on you, anyway what happen to your rhetroric of respecting girls gets u laid, if she isnt wanting to kiss you, you dont keep on trying, guy got kicked out of my university halls of residence for trying that after she complained to the university. Most people dont actually like the Jocks that dont take no for an answer.

What do you want? just a girlfriend and not be bothered my socialising with men? If you want a girlfriend you're going to have to be in highly social settings unless you get lucky and find a girlfriend at some nerdy introverted interest group or some bond over a girl on some discord server ive know of peoples of it happening too but it will be much less likely and wouldn't get yours hopes on it. I like going to drinking meetups they provide excellent situations to meet people, can't deal with noisy bars or clubs though, maybe a quiet bar or a pub.

How do you know women don't find you handsome me and my mates have very different tastes in women , im sure you've turned a few heads, but your defeatest attitude is certainly a turn off. Pretend all women find u attractive , doesn't matter if it's not true but it will give u the positivity

People have different personality types so they don't all resonate to this but I can't deny that I'm innately a total goofball, I can act serious when needed, but in general I don't treat life as being a serious endeavour, as Allan watts once said "“Man suffers only because he takes seriously what the gods made for fun.” My mind doesn't like to break the ice with people by asking them 20 questions about their studies or vocation or hobbies or whatever. I express who I am with what genuinely entertains my own mind, like I might have some mad theories about parlllel universes or joke I have second indentity and I will throw in some stuff about my life as well and ask others about theres, but thats just the filler, I turn my life story into a comedy and tell them all the mad situations I've gotten my self into and interesting decisions I've made. I don't get too nerdy whilst expressing my interests I make it some what relatable so whilst humourising metaphysics I might say that we're in the matrix and I'm a figurement of their imagination. I also combine it with a bit of playful teasing and especially in a flirty way with girls. I feel this is a great way to build rapport instead of talking about mundane stuff like i see with a lot of people, but i am on the spectrum so my brain works a bit differently, by using my humour It shows that I don't have to dominate people to climb ' the show ladder' and I'm not trying to get anywhere at all, but i dont agree with dominating people it goes against my integrity even if it did get me some success with women firstly it would attract the wrong type of woman for me and secondly it wouldn't feel awful breaking my values. Some people don't like me acting like a goofball because it doesn't allow them any room to socially dominate me as I'm not challenging them or they just think its juvenile behavour and we should be serious all the time. I've also found when you risk social judgement by acting a goofball it makes you more attractive because you're comfortable in your own skin and would risk being judged for the person you're attracting not that you care of their opinion as you do it for you. Its definitely quirky but it leaves no room for bullies to get under my skin and space to express my authentic personality without being too serious and nerdy

@Tyler Robinson psychic energy ? isnt that just another word for intuition? Humour works well for me as i hate boring banal small talk so like to throw the getting to know people in with the humour, I suppose the defensiveness comes about as plenty of people don't accept and like autistic people, I understand that I'm strange and can frustrate and confuse people with my quirks and inside references that people dont get or misreading social cues, but the humour is my greatest strength I would say. I know older people see me as being quite juvenile as I over hear them say things like " he's so cute" which is a bit patronising, but I do me, I'm 26 but only attract women those 18-20, people my own age are either engaged, married, has a kid or two or are in a serious relationship, I've never dated that much so I'm a bit behind in my development and can better relate to those 18-20 even if society doesnt approve of age gaps, but attraction doesnt work via social rules.

The conservatives have finally caved and let a non white be PM, only because they had no viable candidates left that wouldn't destroy the party completely. He was a good chancellor during the pandemic and not completely self serving elitist focusing, not tanking the economy to horde money for the rich, although he does come from a billionaire asian family so not quite same as a working class PM. Ethnic elites are more culturally identified with the elite than their own heritage and ethnicity and would happily throw them under the bus to stay in power and impress their rich friends. This is a step in the right direction though as it will change the view that government is being ruled by non other than old white men even if we had to put up with countless poor leaders before the party and party voter base finally caved.

Thats what communism aimed to do and failed because of how self serving we all are, the ones in power were the worst has they had control of it all

I think Leo should start a DMT TIk tok challenge , lets see whos ego is left standing

@Leo Gura I'd rather die personally , prison sounds like hell

There is no end to searching, once u get the girl u will be looking for whatever is next and don't forget relationships can be difficult and result in a lot of arguing ,my housemates at uni were like stockbrokers on the phone pacing about trying to sort things out with their gf. seemed to make them very stressed, nothing can fill that void inside of you other than your own being

walk in the park dancing pub

Many russians have family and connections in Ukraine did Putin really think his soldiers and people would stand behind him on this one, this isnt a patriotic war of ww2 this is nothing but a power grab for putins ego. Even at the start of the war entire squadrons surrender immediately when they learnt it wasnt a training exercise. This is the 21st century people have a large influence from media outside of russia and wont just blindly follow anything their state tells them. People know when a war is pointless, unjust and serves nothing they believe. People have values that they are willing to die over as they know if they survive the war they will just want to kill themselves anyway, there're many instances of soldiers turning on their commanding officers also known as fragging. Russian people arent as stage red as putin believes and look what hes done to his own position in his country and the world. I cant see how his regime will survive this.

I just think its really sad, guys acting like a bully to act tough or guys that are macho, sure some people might find being overly dominant attractive, but the price you pay for that is you are out of your integrity. I will certainly stand up for myself and others, but I will never start a fight just to look hard. Macho guys never look happy they're always looking over their shoulder worrying about whos going to start on them because they've made that many enemies and have very shallow friendships, so there is very much a huge cost.

True that just drop the neediness , develop empathy and tap Into your authenticity

@Blackhawk intelligent in the sense you need brains to run a country, plan a war, engage in diplomacy etc. Its not a job for a lay person, but stupid in the sense of being low conscious and missing what life is all about expanding love and consciousness

I think the war will end with the collapse of the armed forces and many munities as people refuse to be sent to their deaths

@LordFall it still goes on to some extent a woman in the UK has been locked up for 12 years because she tried to hire a hitman off the darkweb to bump off a love rival, a journalist for the BBC uncovered it.