Emrie

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About Emrie

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  • Location
    Lausanne, Switzerland
  • Gender
    Male
  1. I feel that because I've experienced that, and now I'm working to catch up. At 27 years old. I think, as a society, we need to really improve this situation for all of us because it's really heartbreaking. Yeah absolutely, the Fixed v Growth mindset. I've actually judged most people around me as Fixed, I'm probably jumping to conclusions without a huge ton of conclusive evidence on it. To be honest, I'm not even mad at fixed people, I might just decide not to deal with them, or contain how much I deal with them to specific purposes. I think Leo talked about this in his get laid series, and I wholeheartedly agree. We all need to learn and improve ourselves so that we can be happy about our social, romantic, and sexual lives because that shit will eat us from the inside. Maybe my resentment towards these people is partly due to my own frustrations. I want to make it clear that I tried to be the least offensive and tried to not make them feel bad about how they were behaving, mainly because I'm scared of standing up for myself, but also because I was empathizing with them. Actually you're not too far off tbh, you could consider me to be the woman in a typical man to woman interaction with the two guys hitting on me. I'm actually bisexual, dating guys is not off the table. I do seek someone who knows what they're doing, and I do strive to develop myself and become someone who knows what they're doing as well. Out of curiosity, what do you mean "nobody cares about you like that if you don't do something for them"? Do you mean nobody wants to have sex with me when we meet? Because that's not true, those two men hitting on me very much wanted to have sex with me. Also, just as an FYI, I identify as a demi-man. It's under the non-binary umbrella and it's someone whose gender is partially aligned with the male gender, but not completely. I was assigned the male sex at birth, but as you said "I thought you are a woman writing this", my gender expression is not completely that of a man. Though I use he/him pronouns and am happy to embody typically masculine behavior, I also have some more feminine gender expression.
  2. Specifically the ones who have no social calibration whatsoever. The amount of shit I've had to deal with from toxic men is just awful. Here are five examples that come to mind, like literally off the top of my head: 1) When my brother lost his virginity, he literally told everyone. I mean ... EVERYONE. We had a party with at least like 40 people and he just told everyone there, it's INSANE! This whole macho "Oh I had sex mwahaha" bullshit, like imagine how insecure you have to be for something like this. Jesus christ! 2) I was once talking with a group of people, including one guy. The dude had no fucking social calibration whatsoever, he would start talking to me randomly when I was clearly following another conversation. And that's not the worst part, he was trying to hit on me. I was clearly not interested in him and even trying not to talk with him but he kept insisting, like TAKE A FUCKING HINT!!!! 3) I met a guy once, again through a group of friends. Literally the first question he asked me was "are you single?" ... honestly I should have said yes because then he asked me if I wanted to go to a sauna with him... *sigh* I gave him the coldest possible look and shook my head "no", he still tried to give me his fucking number after. The fuck has to be wrong in someone's head to behave like this! 4) I went to a party wearing a suit. Literally the first person who talks to me, and literally the first thing they say is "Oh you're definitely gonna get laid wearing this suit tonight". As if a fucking suit gets you laid... I had like five other people that night tell me I was trying to get laid with that. The fucking slut-shaming for wearing nice clothes is insane to me! Maybe I wear a suit because I want to look good and sex has nothing to do with it. 5) I was on a plane recently and there was a dude in front of me who spent THE ENTIRE TWO-HOUR FLIGHT writing a bio for his Tinder profile. Now, not only was it the most boring and least original bio I've ever seen, what I hated most was the attitude he and his friends had toward the whole thing, they were all like "woooow you're so gonna get laid with this awesome profile". -- Now of course I can reframe this and understand that it's really not really all that bad. My brother was just proud of himself and wanted to share how happy he was with the rest of us. I respect that. I didn't outright reject the dude so it's understandable he was talking to me. And he was mostly just being friendly and showing his intentions. The sauna guy I'm pretty sure was autistic. Autistic people shouldn't be treated as evil sexual predators, they're gonna have a harder time socially and that's okay. People saying I was trying to get laid were actually right, I was trying to get laid. The dude on the plane was probably just trying to find love and being himself, nothing wrong with any of that. But still like ... where did we go wrong that guys are so badly socially calibrated? I noticed this in myself where I'm really struggling to be this really fun interesting guy who also treats people right and I tell myself that I'm the fucking bottom of the barrel, but then I have interactions like above and I realize that there are people who've got it even worse than I do! Anyways rant over. Mods if this is too incendiary or breaking any rules, firstly I apologize, and secondly I'll be happy to take it down or you can take it down.
  3. By the way, somewhat related, Russia blew up Nord Stream 1 and 2: https://news.yahoo.com/russia-blows-gas-pipelines-declaring-152121714.html
  4. One of the things I started doing recently is cooking a whole chicken in water at a low temperature for a long time. And then when the chicken is cooked, I get the meat off and put the bones back in and cook for a few more hours. This way I get chicken bone broth on top of chicken and l can drink the bone broth directly or cook vegetables in it. It's a great way to get protein.
  5. Basically yeah. When I was growing up, at school, everybody made fun of me, bullied me. I had no friends and there were even people who would spend the majority of their time mimicking me and making me look stupid. Then, at home, my siblings wouldn't comfort me or help me but instead say that it's my fault they're bullying me because I'm giving them reasons to. I went to several different schools and always ended like that. Now as an adult, I'm scared. Obviously I'm not scared that I'll get bullied, I'm just scared the interaction will go badly and people won't like me.
  6. Insomnia right now. It's 12:45am. I need to sleep but I can't. I made the resolution I was going to work by bike tomorrow. That's 35km by bike. I have to wake up at 6am. I think I'll have to skip the bike because I don't think I'll be able to cycle this much on this little sleep. But also I want to challenge myself and do it anyways. -- Anyways I want to do a thought experiment tonight, imagining tomorrow in a High Vibration vs Low Vibration state: If I'm in High Vibe state, I'll wake up at 6am and cycle to work. While cycling, I'll breathe well, stand upright on the bike, and take in the environment completely. Then, at work, I'll be doing my various tasks always coming from a mindset of "how can I provide the most value to that person". At lunch, I'll be eating with my colleagues and be present to the moment, relaxed, and not worrying about whether or not I'm cool and interesting for them enough, I'll just be me, be there, listening, joking, and in flow. Coming home from work, I might cycle again or take the train. My grandmother will have arrived and we'll spend some time together. If I'm in Low Vibe state, I'll wake up at 7am and take the train to work. Once at work, I'll just do the bare minimum to call my tasks finished. At lunch, I'll worry to always have something to say and that'll freeze me up and we'll end up with moments of silence. In fact I'll probably end up taking out my phone and just browsing that for a while. Even though I removed all social media, I'll probably just end up reading up this forum. Then I'll get back home from work and engage as little with my grandma.
  7. Just ordered one. Will report the results. Should be mostly French or Western-European.
  8. Really worth a watch and they go into a lot of details of what happened, crazy stuff.
  9. lmao crazy how quickly things change. So I didn't go out yesterday because the guy in question had fallen ill. I was half-tempted to go out alone but I'm still too scared to do it. The apartment is cleaner. It's not completely clean, there's still a decent chunk to do but it's generally okay I would say. It's never been this clean in months, and it's really nice having it in such a clean state. Can't wait to have it completely clean and feel great about myself. My evening routine is working brilliantly, I'm sleeping like a baby. I've also made the resolution that every I gotta do some kind of cardio activity. So today I'm going to walk on the stair-stepper for an hour, tomorrow I'm going to be commuting to work (and possibly back home, if I feel strong enough) by eBike (it's 35km), then Tuesday I'll be doing another round on the stair-stepper on top of the upper-body workout, Wednesday I'll be running 5k, etc...
  10. I'm going out tomorrow night One of my work friends has his wife and daughter gone for the weekend and invited me to go out. So we'll go out. I'm pretty jacked and really pumped to get into it. Tomorrow's gonna be crazy hectic, I have like ... waaaay too much to do and way too little time, though. I have to clean up my apartment, at least to a somewhat okay state. This will very likely take more than like 4 hours. My apartment is SOOO dirty. Then I really want to get a run in, because it's unlikely I'll be able to do one on Sunday after going out Saturday. Or I'll just be super tired. Blargh, maybe I just postpone to Monday. Also I need to get some rain running gear because it'll rain tomorrow, so there's that. And then there's also going to be the meetup at 4pm. Which is going to lead into the going out with my work friend right after. OH! Also I have to buy food for next week! So yeah I have to do all of that by essentially 3pm tomorrow which is just SUUUPER early. Knowing myself I'll end up half-assing the cleaning and skipping the run. I'll try to go for a run on Sunday, worst case.
  11. @nowornever21 k, what'd you recommend then?
  12. I've done weed once in my life, at a party, while otherwise completely sober. Honestly it didn't really do all that much for me. It's really not a hard drug at all. Coffee affects me more. Legalizing it makes sense. Anyways, when are we legalizing psychedelics?
  13. I've been getting into a bit of an evening routine to get myself to sleep and relaxing and it's been great. So yesterday I spent some time on here; then had dinner and cooked lunch for today, then had a bath, read a book, and went to sleep. I had a really nice sleep. Gonna do it again tonight, hoping to get it to a proper habit. That'll mean I have good exercise, good diet, and good sleep. At that stage I think I'll have my whole health figured out and locked down, so I'm generally happy with that.
  14. I'm content in my little corner of the world debating with other Swiss people about how we can pay for people's retirements with higher life expectancy and slower demographic growth. Obviously what that person did is absolutely horrible and should be punished heavily.
  15. In the last two or three decades of this century, maybe even into the next. Weed is still illegal in most of the world including all of Europe: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legality_of_cannabis#/media/File:Map-of-world-cannabis-laws.svg Though it is decriminalized in many places and even unenforced in many others, we're still a long way from it being freely legal and purchasable like other drugs. Might be a good 10-20 years for liberal countries to allow it properly, much longer for more conservative ones, even developed ones like Japan. I think it was in the video "Removing the Stigma on Psychedelics" that Leo talked about how he'd see them being legal, you'd have to be educated and even trip in a controlled environment while being watched by evaluators (a sort of exam) before getting a license that allows you to buy psychedelics. Society and people need to evolve quite a lot before they can start using psychedelics correctly, and they ain't getting legalized before that, even with mountains of evidence piling up consistently over the future. They might start being legalized for medical use to treat depression specifically and only in places like California or Canada at first but that's decades before mainstream adoption.