axiom

Red emerges from gold when gold is strapped to darkness. Gold emerges from red when red it strapped to light. This is just the way it is. Only the miserable ask why.

If you fold a piece of paper once or twice you simply have a folded piece of paper. But if you fold it in every place and every direction, the paper is flat.

I do. God is utterly insane, completely lost in a maelstrom of infillions of thought-fractals of its own making. And it has no way out. Ever. It can't find itself. All it can do is temporarily focus on its tiniest fragments - of which you are one - before getting lost again.

I think probably what happens is some type of omniscience which fleetingly allows you to compassionately reflect upon the life you thought you were living.

It sounds like you're picturing the perfect, as-yet unrealised version of yourself and you feel you're falling short. This happens when you have too much time to think about yourself. Common cause and effect of depression. Here's the secret: You need a radical change of focus from YOU to OTHERS. Today. While you show concern for *others*, you won't have time to be concerned about *yourself*. If you find your thoughts drifting back to your own imaginary shortcomings, then: a) recognise what it is that you're doing; and b) think instead about what you can do to make the lives of others better or more pleasant. Be helpful to others. Daydream about what they might want in their lives. Make it a habit to think of others *instead* of yourself, and help out where you can. Even something as simple as volunteering to do the shopping or making them a cup of coffee. Be a good listener. After a couple of weeks of the above, I guarantee you'll realise that you're becoming much, much, much happier, and it will happen almost entirely as a side effect of NOT thinking about yourself. Thinking about ourselves too much makes us all damn miserable.

OK. So what remedy are you seeking here?

@Thestarguitarist14 You may or may not be aware that media propagandists and politicians make earnest efforts to stir up civil unrest, and foster divisiveness across a range of issues for political gain. Don't fall for it. I have seen numerous claims of racism where it manifestly does not exist. This is incredibly damaging to the cause of achieving real equality in society. Your capacity to be offended isn’t something that you should respect. In fact, it is something that you should be on your guard for. Perhaps more than any other property of your mind, this feeling can mislead you.

The "hard problem of consciousness" simply stated: Scientists don't understand why consciousness is needed at all, since we would behave no differently without it. Numerous experiments have shown that decisions are made by the body before they reach our conscious awareness. We are not calling the shots. Thoughts happen but we do not originate them. So, as humans we have zero ability to enact our will upon anything. We are just collections of atoms reacting mechanically to physical causes (plus a puzzling added extra: superfluous consciousness) My question is, once this dream world has been transcended and we recognise ourselves as God, do we have free will? Are we then able to originate effects? I don't believe anyone knows the answer for sure, but I'd be interested to hear your thoughts...

I understand the sentiment, but I don't think "supposed to be" comes into it. This is about what is. Maybe God is the flip-side on all accounts. Matter (duality) and anti-matter (Oneness) attracted and repelled, cancelling each other out eternally. Wanting and not-wanting, yin and yang. Destruction and creation. Oneness and many. Humans "want" death / oneness. Oneness "wants" life...?

Yes... that dang ego getting in the way. My impressions are probably also corrupted by reading too many articles and books, listening to too many spiritual practitioners, and seeking just a little too much in general. Not enough direct experience here. Oneness "wants"... seems like the ultimate oxymoron. Difficult to digest that. Creation. This needs pondering deeply. It seems that when we are in creative flow states, we tend to forget ourselves. Perhaps that's a clue to what "creation" actually is.

You are referring to avoidance of pain and suffering. But avoiding pain and suffering doesn't seem to promote awakening. If God created pain, then perhaps he did it so that in its transcendence, realising that it is NOT YOU, you come home. Accepting pain and suffering as it arises, without identifying with it, is the way. Pain is "good" in that respect. It's useful. Just ask a Vipassana meditator. In my own experience of Vipassana, moving the awareness around the body for day after gruelling day, hour after gruelling hour, focusing on sensations (mostly pain due to holding the same positions for such long periods) it was eventually recognised that "I" am awareness alone: Not awareness plus bodily sensations. Not awareness plus thought. Just awareness. When this realisation struck, I couldn't stop smiling and laughing. It is pure liberation.

This calls for some poetry: God's cognitive dissonance collapses Unease and discomfort relaxes Conflicting ideas were ne'er conflicting; Love fills the air as my dog farts in the corner.

As far as I can tell, this is the point I was making.

If you are the dream character, what can you do to change the dream? Talk of 'will' seems like it involves self-identification, whether it is human will or God's will. This is not right or wrong.

'What will' implies a past and a future. I feel like "what is" is more intuitive.

That's all clear to me. As such, differentiating any of the 'I's, whether used in reference to an individual, or to God itself, would be missing the point. God is not an 'I'. My question about will remains though, should there be a 'God'. I'm beginning to feel like "nothing" comes above God in this imaginary heirarchy.

But remember, "you" can't notice it at all

You're probably right

My impression is that it is the ego, and not Mind, that wills, wants or grasps. To collapse into oneness, generally what seems to be required is that we drop all of the above. If God is the ultimate and only real example of absolute oneness, then where does that leave will? I'll add in the usual disclaimer here that I've never taken 5MEO.

I think the point @Asayake is making is that you can't do anything if you don't exist.

I find it more intuitive to consider that God is infinitely loving and infinitely at peace precisely because it is one, and it cannot therefore want anything at all. But I am not married to this idea. @Leo Gura Does God's will involve needing or wanting something, as you see it? That to me is very tied to the meaning of "will".

@Brittle_buddha Nothing I can say here will do your experience justice... but that's one of the most beautifully descriptive and emotional trip reports I've ever read. Jeremy's human body-mind has a great way with words! Being "back here" as an apparent human can feel like a lot to wrestle with. I wish you a peaceful integration over the coming apparent months, apparent years, and eternal now.

I understand that part. It's literally a dream. But I'm not sure if God is a force of will. A force of infinite love, yes, because greater love is revealed with every collapsed bias or duality. But... a force of will, I'm not sure. I think God probably just is. I do think it's a very interesting question. Who knows. The idea of "will" seems anthropomorphic.

@Vynce I don't think love is a type of bias. Love is simply what is revealed in the collapsing of biases and dualities. This phenomenon can be intuitively witnessed in close relationships. Infinite love involves so much collapse of duality that only oneness / God remains. Love isn't something that can be wanted or summoned into existence (as far as I can tell) since all wanting is a move away from love into duality.