Breakingthewall

I've had several experiences like you mentioned, some with psychedelic and others without (but never before having done 5meo for the first time), when they finish it is forgotten, it is impossible to keep the memory. You know that you have seen the absolute, but you do not remember what it was like, because it is impossible to remember. memory is made of images and words and these are not used to save these experiences on the hard drive, you can only live it in real time. little by little the certainty is settling that the only thing that is valuable and true is to live constantly with that openness to that, without ego, it is not easy to get there but I think it is not impossible

I do , 5 meo over all. Small dose and sometimes big doses. After a big one the mental masturbation comes to me without scape, like now, that I can't stop thinking in the singularity . The problem is that the perceptions that you have are not in the land of the mind, so the memory can't catch them, you know that were real, absolute, but you can't catch it, only live it in the present moment. Since you can't , you masturbate your mind....at least me. And mental masturbation sometimes is a good activity, like physical masturbation

Yes is everything but same time is one, in the moment that it's one MUST be more. My mind rebels hardly to the idea of ONE, because I perceived like everything , and like one, a singularity. Maybe it's impossible to understand, or Maybe it's the point of the iceberg. And sorry if all of this is obvious, I'm just starting

yes but what is god if he stops dreaming? God is the dream and the dreamer, he is like a dream machine, dreaming is in his nature (ours to be precise), it is like his mission. why? Why it exists ,the first question. it's the only one? when manifesting as infinite by definition it is unique ... within what we can conceive. but is that all? when manifesting as timeless it is uncreated, but in no time what does that mean? Why does God have to exist and be the only thing that exists? Maybe it's only the limit that we can perceive

There is not before or after, when you die nothing is going to happen with you since you are not happening now. The universe is being generated now, creating the illusion of time. Ok ok, we heard that many times , but what is more deeper? I saw me like an adimensional point, only being that exist, in the cosmic loneliness of the eternal present. Is it real? Maybe it's only the point of the iceberg

Sounds really logical. At the end the material universe is quite logical, so who knows. Maybe there are many levels of reality, and the conciousness is only one of them. To say :no, I perceived the absolute and there is nothing out of it is silly, the perceptions could be illusory

I have a € 20 one from amazon and it works very well, it has a deviation of about 2 mg, but it can be fine-tuned more easily. You weigh it once and it weighs 6, the next 7 then 5, again 7. Well, you deduce that it weighs 6, since it was never 4 or 8

great, you're right, there's no happiness out there, just disappointment. maybe the time has come to look inside

I saw the singularity, and without words I humbled myself, in silence

If you analyze it from the logical mind, all the indications point towards the existence of a clear intention. all this precision, this perfect design ... a game? a very serious game

good metaphor, that's right. you can experience without a doubt that you are the totality of what there is and that separation is an illusion. the problem is that it is not just an illusion, it is somehow real. I perceive what I see, not what you see. If you crush your bone I don't feel pain. We are the same but we are separate so it is very difficult not to fall again and again in the egoic point of view. it is like seeing things from one perspective or another. both are valid but you can choose which one to focus on. The transcendent perspective offers advantages, and this is why we choose to take it, since we know that in the end it does not matter, what it is, it is.

to get out of the caves, have heating and travel to Mars is science, but we are not talking about that. you are doing an impossible exercise. you understand what spiritual work is about right? is deconstructing yourself, eliminating until there is ... what? eliminating everything. For that you have to first understand it for what it is, and to understand and eliminate the reason, the concept, reason does not work, it is evident. you have to look at it from a higher place, not from within. Let's see when you dare to leave that mind that you idolize aside, even for 2 minutes. you will get really surprised

You read my answer and it seems like empty nonsense, I understand. the point is that my answer comes from direct perception. I have perceived with total clarity that under the illusion of this reality there is a timeless and dimensionless emptiness. absolute nothingness. but on the other hand, I see that that nothing in some way that I do not even remotely understand, generates this reality in real time. generates space and time in the precise present moment, since it is timeless. that's why I say: mystery

Get open to the possibility (remote) that you are not understanding because you are in a only rational state or conciousness (call it low if you prefer)

What do you mean?

What do you mean? That there are not two, the ego and the conciousness? Sure, but seems like are two, this is the problem. Is hard to realize that the ego really is nothing, because is like realize that you are nothing, takes time, over all because it's not a sustitution , the ego for the conciousness. The conciousness is not a "person". but I think I'm surrendering to it. It's the reality, hard or no hard. I'm finding the beauty in being "no one". With the enormous help of this forum

It's an absolute nothing that do things... mistery

Sometimes I get it, and I think...it's simple, not a big thing. It's only that im not me, me is like an avatar. What happens if the avatar get broke? If I die, Where I'm going to go?Nowhere, many avatar are still working, if not that stone, everything, it's obvious. It's not magic, migthy or anything, it's clean, simple and empty. More simple or easy than be an ego. But after I start to think about it, and I get back to the ego, and really I don't remember exactly how was when I wasn't an ego, but I clearly remember there is not fear, because if I'm not me is the same what happens to me. It isn't like glory or wisdom , is only like detachment. Is that enlightened? I don't think so but it's a comfortable way of being. Enlightened should be a impossible state because how to be the conciousness and same time be limited in one person?

It's god himself but developing himself, so like creating and improvising. Or looks like that

because God is not omnipotent, needs to do things with an order, with a process. for that it creates time, to grow in complexity. so he needs stability to perfect his work

if there is no time nothing happens, if there is no space there is no shape or limits. the absence of both = nothing. but still nothing is. Can you imagine it? I don't. I think the only way is to perceive it by stopping the mind

All that exist is mistic, but as we are talking since a "scientific" perspective, I meant the experience that is beyond the "I", the perceptions who comes when the ego, or the thought stops

This is the point. Sure it's possible with meditation, but looks very difficult to stop the mind only willing it. I start trembling of lazyness every time that I think in a vipasana retirement, but at the end we should be strong

Yesterday I did 5meo, a small vaporized dose, 5 mg approx. The reason for these small doses is that the dissolution, even if it is very brief, of my ego gives me peace and the possibility of advancing in meditation for several days. In the end, the ego takes up too much space again and meditation and contemplation becomes very difficult, although I know that the voice of the mind is false, it does not shut up, although little by little it loses strength. Normally, even if the dose is small, visions, openings occur. In this case, the following occurred: 10 seconds after inhalation, I noticed that the effect was stronger than expected, black vision with eyes open. After a few seconds, the vision, absolutely obvious, clear: reality is illusory, I am creating it in real time, at this moment (I have seen this before), but I also see that reality is a madness, a kind of infinite wheel that I can't get out of, a crazy dance. A dream, as I have read hundreds of times, without substance. I (I don't know if I, God or who) am the only one who exists, everything is my dream but I can't get out of it. I perceive that if I want peace, the perfection of the perfect eternal peace that I am, I have to finish the dream, and for that I have to die somehow, make all the reality dissapear, stop dreaming. This is not a metaphor, it is completely real: I only exist and I dream. The enormity of this is ... Enormous. What does it mean? Reality or "maya" as they say, is something, let's say ... sickness? Does it mean that I am god and I am trapped in this maya until I discover how to die? I, in the center of the wheel of madness, perceive myself as light, perfect peace, but entangled in reality. Does it mean that more than God I have perceived my current person who is trapped in the illusion of the ego? Difficult to know because the vision is undone and after a while the memory fades, there are some flashes and the memory of what what I thought after. After this there is a great sense of peace (I have already gotten used to the incredible, I'm not scared anymore), and doubts about the meaning. What I really want is to go deeper, to leave behind the layer of the concept that is sterile and false. The vision of this deeper reality is an enormous help. Believing is not the same as seeing, but questioning, trying to interpret is inevitable, especially when there are so many points in common with the spiritual tradition (Maya, etc). What is certain is that this does not come by suggestion, the vision is absolutely real, unfiltered, and also it is not sought, I only seek the momentary dissolution of the ego as "therapy".

I will, even @Nahm say there is no progress, just be ?