Princess Arabia

Your question had a few parts to it, but let me say, physical attraction is just that, physical attraction. I would not be in a relationship with a man and be providing for him, no. The only way, is if we were already married and he was unable to work and the love was there before whatever the reason he couldn't work anymore and if I was able to take care of the household. That wouldn't be grounds for divorce but i wouldn't marry him under those conditions. There are plenty of men out there who are looking to provide for the women they love and/or want to marry and who are also attracted to them physically. Women usually love different than men. A woman will grow in love with you if she feels cared for even if you consider yourself not so attractive.

This just shows your ignorance. I have or am in the process of seeing the beauty of God's creation everywhere, My level of Awareness and States of Consciousness are not the same as they used to be so the lie would be for me to call people ugly. You are calling me out and sound so angry in the process. I don't have to pretend to not see ugliness in people to seem special. I am very open and vocal on this forum and don't have a problem exposing my true feelings about anything. You have never heard me call anyone ugly, except for in the term I used it to make a point so why are you telling me about how I view things. That's limiting because you don't know that, you're assuming. I do not like the word ugly anymore. I didn't say I don't see attractiveness in people, I just don't call people ugly. I never even used to before I became Spiritually inclined that much either. That's it. No more explanation on that. I've seen men choose females that weren't so attractive over really attractive ones because of their confidence levels and the energy they exude. They thought they were the shit and it showed. I didn't say they were lying to themselves, I said they thought they were attractive, while the so-called attractive one didn't. There is a lot of psychology that goes into attraction. No need to say my opinion is bullshit, it's just an opinion. A woman can look at a male and judge parts his personality from that alone, not saying she's right but that's really what she's doing. She can see through his insecurities or weaknesses just from his body language or even how he dresses,. You hear that on this forum alot also, how women can sense certain things. Men don't usually care about that at first, they usually go for the one they are physically attracted to at first, while the woman is looking for emotional attraction and doing it by how he looks. Why do you keep using the word lie. People believe different things, studies or not, Sounds like you had someone constantly lie to you and you're projecting that or vice versa. No need to call people liars for their opinions and expressions.

That's a belief system; but even if you believe that, you are just dooming yourself, because now you have to live up to that belief; and if you were to ever get married, you wouldn't value your wife after a while. You'd be surprised what people find valuable. One man's trash is another man's treasure.

"It's a contradiction." Hehe.

That's what I meant. Incompatible for you. Thanks for the correction. I try to use my words wisely and try to use them in the correct term but sometimes after watching so many lifetime movies, the wrong wife, the wrong car, the wrong husband, the wrong student etc, my brain gets used to a certain term. Hehe. Thanks. I agree.

The wrong type of woman would be the type of woman you don't want, but are attracting because of how you're vibrating. Sometimes you won't know that before being with them for a while, hence breakups or constant friction.

You can only feel devalued if you give yourself permission to feel devalued. I don't know if you're trying to devalue me (not saying you are or you're not, just trying to answer your question) but my take is just my take. Your hyper generalizing my take says nothing about me and my take, so no, I wouldn't feel devalued. My take can change as yours too, so I don't identify with my take. I don't take it personally.

I think that's what I really meant, looking over my re-enactment. Sometimes we see others how we see ourselves and the relations we have with them. You described it so deeply and with so much precision, that it just seems like you were describing something other than the subject. Since knowing you on this forum and how insightful and Spiritually mature you are, and you seem to have a deep sense of who you are and seem grounded in a way I looked at your description differently because I sensed it was coming from the heart and not the mind. You were describing you and how you saw yourself. That's why they say people are your mirror. Anyway, I hope you fully heal and I can tell you've come a long way and most people would have carried that resentment on and projected their anger unto the world in different ways, but you seem fairly grounded will all that emotional turmoil you endured as a child.

You have twisted the term honesty to suit your explanation purposes and that's the irony of what I'm saying. You are making my point even more the more we speak.

Lol...be honest....just kidding.

This is what I'm talking about. Men love the challenge. It's how they develop as a species. You're probably thinking no sense in enlightening anyone about this because they won't listen even if it will make it easier to be with women. I don't have all the answers but I can say I've learnt about men from other men. It's all about survival. Women are how they are and men are how they are with some variations. Getting to the root of it to try to figure out why, will make you one step in the game instead of demonizing the opposite sex. Things are deeper than they seem and humans like to complicate things. You don't go apply for a job you're not qualified for so why expect women or men to fit into your agenda without putting in the work. Women measure men for a reason, not because they are vain, a lot of it is subconsciously done, likewise men do the same. Understanding these differences will make your life a lot easier and instead of putting your own limiting beliefs in the picture because of what you have believed to be true, less complications will arise if we just try to understand where these differences lie and how to fit them into our own puzzle.

You are taking this out of context.

It's not about conforming to others but more not wanting to go through what it would take to be honest. Not all circumstances are the same and not all repercussions are the same I said discernment is the key. If your life depended on it, you'll see how quick honesty goes out the window in favor of surviving. Please take into consideration all the aspects I'm expressing here. Honesty is always the best policy, but humans are afraid of everything including the choice to be honest in every circumstance. You might say this is a bad example but here goes. If a woman is confronted by a rapist who says if she's on her period he would leave her alone and not rape her, do you think she's going to say she's not on her period. No, she will say she is, in order to not get raped. Extreme, but I could name thousands of other scenarios where honesty would not be the best policy when dealing with other humans. Other humans is the key here.

I forgot what I had for breakfast 5 days ago, much less 5yrs ago. You are incorrect when you say everyone is great at remembering everything in their lives. Most stories being told by humans about their past have about a 50% (not sure of the percentage but it's high) accuracy level. That's why they're called stories. Put 10 people at an accident scene, you'll have 10 different interpretations because of how differently the brain interprets things. It is an exceptional trait to be able to remember everything that has happened to you in your life in minute detail of every day. What was your post in December of 2020 and did you even make one. These people would remember that, can you.

Aah, the trickery of the mind. It's honest to be aware that you're being dishonest. It's like saying, I'm aware that i'm stealing so I'm not really stealing. Also, i'm not saying that inspiration doesn't come from being honest, I'm saying when dealing with other humans it's not always the best thing because if you're not prepared to deal with the repercussions, it can throw you in a state of confusion and resentful emotions. Discernment is the key here.

I get it, but people are only acting from their level of consciousness and he is trying to survive as his identity as a sex addict. He said so himself that he's a sex addict.. He's unconsciously believing that, so now he is fighting to keep that identity alive. It's energetic. He doesn't realize that all he has to do is to identify as something else, drop that identity and take actions to become a new identity. Now, since the Ego is just constructions, his mind is believing it has to maintain that structure to keep that part of it's identity alive and it will start to believe things that align with that identity. No sense in knocking someone down because of their ignorance, because now we will perpetrate more ignorant behaviors. I do it too. But I'm seeing through it and working on it. It's a cycle. Understanding is the key and recognizing people are just operating through programming.

Go tell that to the millions of people who tried to be honest with other people just to get bashed in the face with judgements and criticisms. Losing their jobs spouses and whatever else. Dealing with yourself is quite different than dealing with other humans. Being honest with yourself that you are being dishonest, to me, is a better way to be. Survival is at play here, and to the egoic mind, it is whatever works best, not brutal honesty. When you're unconscious, of course, and living from the egoic mind. God is tricking itself so why wouldn't humans play this game too. Humans are also God. So, you are only tricking yourself into believing honesty is the best way. It is, in the grand scheme of things but not when dealing with humans. I will guarantee you, that before you live out your entire human life from now, you will find yourself being dishonest with another human, and not just that, you will believe it is the best way under the circumstances. I'm not saying it's not the best way to be or live, I'm saying it won't be the case.

Re-read this again to yourself and replace your descriptions of him with yourself and see if that's how you felt. Let me give an example: Matter of fact, I'll just re-write the whole thing using the replacement. "When I saw him, it was like I felt like I was a stranger to him. He looked at me through the conceptual lens of "oh this is my son, who i've caused so much pain in his life or "oh this is my son, I love him so much" I am just some guy to him. You were removed from the whole story of you being his son. I saw in myself a person who just went through a lot of suffering in my life. I had shame in my eyes. I felt sad. I felt all these things and I didn't recognize myself anymore. I'm not the same person he thought he once knew. I wasn't the person he was angry at for so many years. The person he was angry at is a different person, a person in his mind. A projection. But this...this isn't that person. This is just me. It was like i saw myself for the first time in my life. There was a deeper love there.....but it was a personal love as in i love myself as his son, not as a human being. Not sure if I replaced all the pronouns correctly, but you get the drift. Are you sure this wasn't how you thought he was seeing you..

I don't really believe this, infact, that's not how attraction works. Good looking? Good looking to whom. Put 10 pictures up and you will have different opinions as to who finds who attractive and good looking. An "ugly" (just for communication purposes because I donlt see people as ugly), an ugly person can see themselves as quite attractive and get more dates than someone physically attractive who don't view themselves as that, and that goes for both male and female, but more towards the male side since men usually go for looks first.

I would defend myself, too and become resentful if someone were to say this things to me in this manner even if it were true. So, expect no less from him if he tries to protect his identity.

You're talking about primitive and cavemen days as if you'd like for us to go back to that when in reality you wouldn't. You're using that to say, if it was like that back then, why isn't it like that now. If I was to mention to you another aspect of life that was prevalent in the old days and why we can't go back to that, your mind would come up with reasons why modern times are better. You're saying old days sex was better because of no manipulation, but if I took away all your money and electronics and told you they didn't have this back in cavemen days, you wouldn't like that too much. So I'm saying your caveman argument is biased and wouldn't hold up in other areas in your life, you're only using it because it suits you now.

This is very interesting to read. I believe this may be the underlying belief and subconsciously acted out why men can be so promiscuous when it comes to the opposite sex and are so sexually inclined in addition to testosterone levels, versus a woman's promiscuity. Her promiscuity is probably more mentally related and has to do with feelings of unworthiness. Something to ponder.

You are using your mind to self-deceive you without even recognizing it because of selfish desires. Eradicate all cell phones, tv, books, internet, etc., you won't be talking about cave-men days, you'd be begging for your sanity back and the opportunity to use those tools again. You are resisting life and wanting it to go back to how it was when you really don't want that you just think you do.

Because people are afraid. Afraid of being too honest for fear of judgement. I wouldn't say the trickery is a bad thing. It is a coping mechanism. If i'm playing hard to get with a guy, for example, I might not actually be deliberately trying to trick him. I might just be trying to protect myself from something, whatever that may be. Vulnerability is one reason why we tend to not be so open with others because humans love to judge, criticize and condemn each other, We have created this dynamic and now we call it trickery and deception. If we were to be blatant about our intentions with the opposite sex, if our intentions aren't pure or of a loving nature, we will always find ways to deceive ourselves and the ones we're trying to influence to fit into our construction. Remember, we are constructing something here so wherever and however we find the bricks to fit into this construction we will try to manipulate our way into getting the work done. It's human genius. Doesn't need to be taught. That's the power we have. To create and to destroy. There's always a deeper meaning to why we do what we do under the surface.

The way you describe it will perpetuate that desperation. Words have power especially if there is a strong feeling behind those words. Desperation implies lack, so maybe if you change your internal dialogue, you will have a better relationship with sex. Seriously. It's a mental world; so how we see things in our minds eye, will become true for us. Ever notice when you stop caring about something, it starts to flow in your life or trying to remember something with a lot of energy, as soon as you let it go, it comes to you. I've recognized the similarities in life when it comes to certain things and I try to use the same strategy in how I do something I'm successful at and try to implement that strategy in other ways because life has a way of showing us the connections to everything.