Roy

Well you see I genuinely want to discuss the topic, so enlighten me and let's not throw labels like narrow minded. I am willing to stake my life aliens exist, but I am skeptical we have ones close enough with the technology to travel faster than light buzzing around our stratosphere in plain sight. Pixelated clips where we nor the military has a clear answer or physical pieces of craft is not conclusive enough. Give me your case I want my skepticism shattered. And please don't dodge and distract from the discussion by bringing up meta-dynamics about the discussion. Let's actually talk about this.

This is the part of my post you respond to lol?

All these fuzzy ass videos mean nothing to me. I'm so sick of these cock teases. Give me some blatant high quality conclusive evidence. Notice how everything is always obfuscated and has NEVER been ground breaking enough that it becomes massive world news. Life, including advanced alien life certainly exists outside of Earth in this ludicrous infinite sized universe we live in. However just because it exists it doesn't guarantee a civilization has crossed the thresholds that hold them back like annihilating themselves or having the luck of the draw amount of resources to develop interstellar travel. I highly doubt knowing what we know about physics that there are aliens close in our galaxy that have FTL travel AND came here to fly and dick around in our atmosphere when such a suggestion means they have the technology to easily observe everything they need to from a distance. I just don't see the logic in them risking their discovery or accidently making contact and giving us a chance to reverse engineer technology and accelerate our evolution to be a competitor. I'm sure in the next few decades we will get 100% confirmation of another civilization when we have scanned enough planets and solar systems and literally see them, but I doubt they are abundant and advanced enough to be recklessly flying drones around our planet. The distances between stars and objects in the universe are simply too vast.

Sometimes you will be right, and a position or experience CAN be justified or true. But it's only a partial truth. And if focusing on it only gets you undesirable results or brings up negative emotions, what use is it to keep focusing on it? You say it yourself; Yes. To let go is to no longer focus on it. Something is part of your experience, to let go is to stop grasping (focusing) and let it pass. So the work to be done is to deeply question your beliefs, thoughts, ideas, and experience. Keep poking holes in them and looking for the ways they are flawed and not serving you. Watch your mind like a hawk, watch how it resists the questioning and comes up with explanations and stories about why you shouldn't change and why everything you already think is "true". Your mind is committed to maintaining the survival of your current list of beliefs, thoughts, ideas, and experiences that make up "you". It doesn't like when you question or change things when you try to "upgrade", so to say.

Yes they are fundamentally flawed, otherwise you wouldn't be "failing miserably" (your words) at getting results if you "understood women and deep psychology" (your words). All those thought patterns, beliefs, and strategies you have been using up until now, you need to drop. Not only are they not getting results in this particular area, but I guarantee they might be affecting other parts of your life too. Of course this is easier said than done, and extremely painful as all of those things are part of an identity you've built up about yourself over years and years. But you need to get rid of them first before you start building up again. Otherwise anything new you learn will end up being corrupted and tainted by all the old bullshit that's been holding you back. It's like trying to build a house an a rotten crumbling foundation. It may look pretty for a while but you're gonna start running into problems down the road. The VERY first thing I recommend is understanding and letting go of the resentment you have built up. Towards those women that "misunderstand themselves" and those "manipulative" men that end up getting better results than you do. Not only is that labelling not true, it's toxic, and makes you bitter in ways you don't even know. Is a bitter know it all attractive? No. You need to learn to stop taking the way those people act and the experiences you have so personally, because all that does is serve to distract you and behave in ways that aren't desirable or productive. Cleanse yourself of the hate and resentment. Look at it for what it is without all the bullshit narratives and ideas you have about it, and let it go.

You see from the perspective I'm offering I'm not telling anyone what they should or shouldn't do, but from the message of organized religion and the similar objective morality perspective that you have in your mind right now you ARE telling people what they should or shouldn't do by the very idea of a "green" signal. That green = "should", "OK", and "Good". It's by the very mechanism of having an ought that actually justifies all the "evil" acts that people do because they are operating from a place of ignorance and righteousness. Ignorance from truly seeing things from others perspective and ignorance of what life could be. Exactly it could, you are right. But the people who kill millions of people like Hitler aren't aware of that. They think they need to do what they do because they are ignorant of how to survive in a better way, not because they are "evil". You create the label of evil because it goes against your interests. If it was in your interests it would be good. There is no objective good or evil written anywhere for us to discover, we make it up. The universe doesn't give a fuck because it makes no difference to the universe if all the Nazis die or if all the Jews die on this planet. The world will keep spinning.

No it wasn't. Not from his point of view. In fact he thought what was was doing was great and perfectly good. Evil doesn't really exist. All it is is an illusion of a simple majority social consensus. Let's say history played out different where the majority of the world actually sided with the Axis and their worldview and they won WW2. What you would live in is a world where people like you and me would be Nazis too and think we were perfectly good, and if you thought you'd think like you do now in this hypothetical, you'd be lying to yourself because it would mean you would have to sacrifice your survival and die being a conscious objector. 99% of people cannot admit how quickly they'd abandon their principles once their skin is in the game. In other words, Evil is precisely what we call things that are inconvenient to our survival. Where whatever is convenient to our survival we call good. The intuitive distinction we make that actually draws us to a higher "goodness" is operating in the background of the traditional conversation of moralism, and it's that we recognize any strategy for survival that is too blatantly limited, not expansive, and causes excess suffering (like Nazism) can't be a good strategy for a constantly evolving species. I guess you could call this intuition a "spiritual" morality and it takes the brutal relativity of reality into account. Though this intuition is more like an overarching guiding force and most people are completely unconscious of it. This is what people are really talking about when they bring up the "Moral Arc of the Universe".

I don't really have a dog in this fight as I outgrew all his content years and years ago, but I have to say it................ The amount of Jordan Peterson hate I see on here is ridiculous. He is a great speaker and teach er, and has helped tens of millions of people with his work. He's making more of an impact than most public figures and "intellectuals" these days. Yes he's got flaws in his epistemology and rails on progressives way more than he should but cut the man some slack. Take the good and leave the rest.

Any substance use will fundamentally cloud your mind, your ability to think, and your consciousness. It's best if any alcohol or substance use is relegated to only very rare occasions like Christmas parties or birthdays. Prepare yourself mentally because you WILL be judged for living a cleaner lifestyle, but how you feel will be worth far more than any razzing you get.

Yea YouTube can be crazy addicting but also crazy beneficial if you are mindful of what content you watch I'm extremely selective with my subscriptions. I've actually only been subbed to the same 7-10 channels for like 10 years.

OP didn't say it was for spiritual enlightenment, just regular personal development and relationships. They overlap but certainly not here.

Everything has it's place, up until the point it doesn't. Perhaps one day we will reach a point where there is next to no killing animals for food, but until that day, this is what is. Of course someone will interpret this as being dangerously passive and as a way to dismiss the problem, "Oh so we shouldn't strive to improve anything at all then?" But that's not what I'm saying, and is just a bad faith interpretation driven by emotion. I'm simply pointing out reality that it exists. Not moralizing or making a judgement call about it. If you accept reality as it is and for what it is, you can see it more clearly and therefore act from a better place. Notice how by moralizing and being upset about something you are actually perpetuating even MORE suffering than otherwise would be the case. This doesn't mean being upset is "bad", any experience is a valid one. Just consider - If you want to improve the situation by reducing suffering and increasing consciousness, would it not be wise to start with yourself first and foremost? Do you think people who want to help animals and change societies habits would be more effective from a place of peace and acceptance, or anger and unacceptance? This post isn't directed specifically at you @Lyubov but anyone reading.

What I just mentioned is the method basically. Your emotions are a good indicator if something is toxic for you, because you will literally feel it.

It's not a science. But the method you should be using is always be cross referencing how you feel internally and observing your own results, vs what proper authorities in society/culture/science might be telling you and looking at results where it HAS worked. Of course only YOU can truly know internally what works for you and what doesn't, but you need to develop radical honesty and increase your consciousness so your ego doesn't delude you back into inaction. Reflect on anything in your personal life that you're trying to work on or improve, is it not obvious most times if something is working or not, when you really sit down and look at it?

Anything can be used as a personal development tool really, as long as you're being conscious about it's use and not letting it become toxic for you. See although it can easily be perceived as a trolling post, there is actually something of value here. @Fandango seems to be already content enough about his dating skills that he can put it on the backburner for a while, but also knows he still has to fulfill his need for sex and pleasure. So instead of giving into his ego and using his ability with women to get that sex in a bad way he's found a healthier way to go about things until he has worked out enough things in himself that he can eventually go back to dating a healthier way.

Ray Comfort has infiltrated Actualized.Org forums lmao.

I believe all this nonsense about diet can be remedied if only we all remembered what our moms said to us growing up - "Too much of anything is bad for you."

Huh? Could you elaborate a bit? I know there are probably genetics that affect the psychology that makes people more "open-minded" and in touch with their emotions/spirituality than others, but 90%? Are you saying 90% CAN'T do spirituality at a deep level? Or that 90% of people WON'T be interested in pursuing it? I mean it's not like University astro-physics where some people won't have the cognitive ability to comprehend the equations no matter what you do. You could teach someone spirituality though if you hit the right cord with them no? I mean some egos will be denser than others........

Well do you really want to keep doing pick-up right now? Or consider that you could always go back to pick-up later on in your life. What matters is expressing how you really feel and accepting the consequences of it. This overthinking and hoping for the "right" answer like it's logical math question shit, is only doing you AND her a disservice. Are those feelings for her genuine, you enjoy being together, and there isn't anything toxic about the relationship? Then what are you waiting for. Commit to each other and see what happens.

You're having too much time to overthink, and stew. It exacerbates negative feelings. Find something you enjoy doing, and do that instead. Without thinking about it.

Yes I am registered to get vaccinated. Just awaiting an appointment to be booked. I will list some simple reasons why I want to be vaccinated ASAP. - I don't want to catch the virus, because that would suck. - I'm a responsible citizen, and a first responder. I do not want to be a vector to infect other people. - I want to be able to travel again as soon as possible and enjoy life.

This is good. I know it's painful, but facing the emotions and understanding them will make it easier to pass through. Part of the reason they persist is lack of understanding and acceptance. So you are headed in the right direction

Some people (those girls) just have a buzz about them sometimes where they just want to interact, and unfortunately they aren't always perceptive to other peoples emotional states. As for your question, look man you don't want to do this. You are thinking about this from a place of fear, which I know you know is not a good thing. Being even more guarded and reclusive may "protect" you a bit better against people like this, but you have to understand they are rare anyways. What's even worse is you would be closing yourself to all the beautiful, positive interactions you might have. The question you should be asking yourself is, "How do I let go and become emotionally unphased when others aren't being considerate". That place of strength is where you want to go, and you will not get there by being protective. You think being "protected" makes you strong, but in fact it's the exact opposite. What makes you strong is being vulnerable and then building up from the hits you take.

There is a lot of bullshit in life, especially in our Western culture. It's a wise decision to try and minimize it so you have more time and resources for what's important to you.

Your potential is limitless so of course there is a lot of work to do It can be overwhelming always looking at the big picture though, you have to learn to stay present and trust the process of chipping away a little bit at a time, day by day. It's also hard to notice any strides you're making until years go by and you realize just how much you've accomplished. One thing I like to ask myself every few months is, am I better off now than I would have been if I hadn't been doing all this work?