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Posts posted by Espaim

    • It has a giant half-life so take it as early as possible. Preferably as soon as you wake up
    • Reduce caffeine intake if you consume any
    • Some people prefer it with or without food. There's no official recommendation. Test for yourself.
    • Dosage: 25-200mg. Start with 50mg and then go up or down.
      • I don't recommend redosing. I just fucking can't sleep before midnight when I take it after noon.
    • Assume your sleep won't be good the night you take it so you can rest more afterward. Modafinil can make you very motivated and spend more energy, so take that into consideration.
    • Try putting it under your tongue. Crush it and use it as a sublingual powder/pill. Some people swear it works better. Test for yourself.
    • Watch out for allergic reactions. It gave me a severe feeling of sickness and I had to cease taking it.
      • Steven Johnson's syndrome. Search about it.
    • It'll probably give you paranoia. Take that into consideration and try to reduce anxiety in your behavior with meditation/calming techniques.

  1. In my workplace, men within my family and male friends, I feel like most of the males try to prove themselves as males. I reached this conclusion from this behavior:

    • Their own capability of attracting women, with subsequent:
      • Trying to beat one another in who scored more women;
    • Dick measurements(who has the biggest dick);
    • Rejecting anything that may be recognized as gay or feminine habits as in:
      • Dancing;
      • Some types of music;
      • Art;
      • Socializing quirks;
        • Showing emotions;
        • Crying;
      • Areas of knowledge (humanities);
    • Sharing porn / sexual images of women;
    • (from my pov)Being needlessly rude, aggressive with other males, or ruthless;
      • On the other hand, being such sweethearts with women. Their behavior instantly changes if a female comes around;
    • And some others I don't remember right now

    Why do they do this? I haven't been able to answer this myself.

    Coincidentally or not, I cannot accuse my SD Green friends of doing this. Not a single one.

  2. I don't have any book recommendation but...

    I used to be addicted to video games but not on that level. I would play as much as I could though. Some day I decided to do a 90 days no videogames challenge and from then on I never got addicted again. I can play with moderation very easily. TBH games got a little bit boring after I saw them in a new light after 3 months.

    It may work for you, it may not. It could be a good start I think

  3. Transition from orange-green:

    What happened over the years is that I have put less emphasis on becoming a super efficient human robot and being rich billionaire materialist badass to working on a purposeful goal. I mean, purposeful life?

    I then realigned my goals to reflect my values and likes and I am working on it. The difference is that I will work towards not being a faceless cog in the machine of capitalism and focusing my work on raising overall consciousness. If I need to earn money to achieve my goals, and I'll need to of course, I'll try do it in the most conscious way I am able to.

    I have developed discipline and work ethic during the years, lost it due to some depressive spells and I'm rebuilding it. That said, I'm still young and I don't have any material success that I can show off. Does this mean I don't have the capacity to do it? Hell no! I do have the achiever mentality developed. The mindset is the thing that matters the most. If your house is on fire and someone stoles all your money and possessions, do you go back to stage blue?

    The idea that money isn't needed is naive. Until we become a socialist world, it'll be needed. How do you plan to help people? Or how do you plan to go to that meditation retreat in tibet?

    Also, achieving, discipline and goals also exist in spirituality, it's just not as obvious. If you don't develop those you will be hard-pressed to succeed in anything, even in spirituality.

  4. You undecided folks would benefit from learning about different types of attraction. Romantic, sexual, aesthetic...

    And maybe uncommon sexualities.If you have the need to fit yourself into a label then at least learn about all the ones that exist: pansexuality, bisexuality, asexuality (aego)... No need to fit into the mainstream hetero/gay paradigm

    There's also Sex-favorableness and sex positivity but i don't know much about it

  5. On 04/01/2021 at 7:32 PM, Espaim said:

    Still need to decide whether I'll need to study or not

    So I'll need to study. Shit, I was wishing very hard I wouldn't need to do this. After analyzing the options, I noticed I'll have to study as I probably won't get a transference. There's a small chance I'll be able to but I'm not counting on it. If I do, I can just stop studying and enter university. This would be an awesome relief! Right now, I'll have to content myself with starting all over again. Life's like that sometimes.

    I'm afraid to start this journey but I'm accepting the call. Fuck it! Here I go.

    EDIT: changed my mind. I'm gonna work and wait for the possibility for a transference (which I have good chances in)