JustThinkingAloud

@Nivsch Both the good and the bad emotion are from a different source. Explore your mind to find the source of the bad feeling. What thoughts, memories, actions etc trigger the bad emotion? It’s much easier to fix it when you know where it’s actually coming from.

Don’t spend more than you earn and pay it off before you have to pay interest on it and you should be fine. If you’re worried, keep your limit low so you don’t overspend. If you start accumulating debt, stop using it, block it, repay it as quickly as you can as it can go out of control very easily.

Maybe try to find faults on her so you don’t idealise her too much. I think that you shouldn’t try too hard to make someone to love you, they should love you for who you actually are.

Things change. Just because the same experience doesn’t make us happy doesn’t mean that we can’t ever be happy again or that the memory is not a great memory any more. There’s new things that we can do and can get. So getting what we want or progressing towards what we want should be celebrated, appreciated and be grateful and thankful for these moments. These moments show that life can be the way we want it and that’s great!

Personally, I find it rude when people don’t face me while I’m talking to them so I find someone else to talk to. Another thing to consider is eye contact when you’re facing someone, not many people like a direct eye contact. I usually look at their mouth or nose so they don’t feel uncomfortable. Sometimes, when I ask a direct question I do look directly into their eyes but not for long. Anyway, I hope this helps a little, either way good luck!

Maybe part of you wants to experience it again, somewhere deep inside. It doesn’t have to be the actual experience that you still want, it could be that great emotion that you had and want to feel like that again.

Wow, that’s great! If you need any help on what to do with it just let know haha

How can I believe that something is true when I need to keep constantly persuading myself that it’s true?

Thank you for sharing your opinion. I suppose we all have different experiences.

I fully understand that you need to be with other girls. I’ve seen number of relationships that broke up simply because one of them haven’t had enough dating experience and wanted to see what it is like with other people. As long as she knows what you’re doing, I think it’s ok and it’s up to her to decide what she wants to do about it. Also, if I was you, I’d get as much dating experience as I can as quickly as I can so I can finally make a decision.

First, don’t ever step down to their level. You’ll become just like them and you won’t like yourself for it. I’ll tell you the way I do it but be careful you might not feel very good about yourself after it, some brutal honesty is coming. Please highlight to read after taking a deep breath! It was all my fault because I failed to protect myself!

Just be careful so they don’t “invent” a sickness for you. None of us are perfect and most of us constantly work on improving ourselves. To me that’s just a natural part of growing up and maturing process. Once you start struggling then you should get help for sure.

We are in control of our thoughts and emotions. So if you have a problem, you can choose the way you feel about it. But the interaction with the outside world can make it much easier. Why to keep persuading yourself that something bad is not bad while you can just act or walk away from it so you don’t have to deal with it internally and can focus on more productive things.

I don’t think that your customers would care about it because it doesn’t affect the service you provide. If you were the customer would you care that the owner of the business did what you did? I would care about the quality of the service I’m getting not about the personal reputation of the business owner. Being me, I probably wouldn’t even know what your name is and I don’t follow any gossip sites so it wouldn’t even reach me. Some people might even admire your courage to take your cloths of, we are all a bit different. If you’re really worried, you can change your name or your appearance so you’re not easily recognised.

Maybe there’s a cost involved. What do you have to do to have the high? If it costs you too much or you have to sacrifice too much then yes, you have to pay for it. Also, if you strongly believe that you’ll pay for it by feeling bad after, you will. You will talk yourself into feeling bad just to prove yourself right.

Thank you And yes, it's all about learning from s**t and not doing it again haha

Wow, I’d love to know all these answers too! My strategy is to have all the information nicely sorted and aligned together. Once I start having internal conflicts, I try to resolve it by picking a side, no arguments are allowed in my head!

No, usually when you have a happy episode it slowly subsides into nothing not into negative and that’s if you don’t revive it but we naturally keep reviving it. I think that in your case it could be fear of losing happiness that kicks in right after you get happy. You can’t lose happy moments or memories, they stay with you forever and every time you recall those memories the feeling comes with it, there’s no need to be scared that you lose them. You can even recreate them because you were able to do it once so you have the skill to do it again.

I had a very bad 7 year marriage and 18 year wonderful relationship without being married. I don’t want to get married again because what happened to me is that very quickly after the wedding my ex started taking me for granted. He didn’t try to make it a good relationship any more, he thought that I’m stuck with him so he can do whatever he wants to me. Anyways, marriage changes things and you better be sure that it’s towards better before you do it.

Not all women are the same. One sided love doesn’t work. When you love someone that doesn’t love you back, it only leads to suffering. Find someone that actually loves you, I know that it’s easy said but it can be done. Loving relationships do exist. And based on your post, you’re a very loving person so once you find someone that actually deserves and appreciates your love by loving you back that person we’ll be very blessed.

It’s all about constant learning and finding a better way of doing things, especially when you’re not very experienced. The more you focus on what you want, the more energy you spend on researching better ways of doing things and you’ll eventually find a way that works. Every time you fail, you learned how not to do it so don’t repeat the same mistake. Keep trying and learning and eventually you’ll get there.

It’s about what is “real” to you. Are you thoughts real to you, are your emotions real to you, are your actions real to you? That’s all it matters.

I was given this life so I might as well enjoy it! It's not good to waste such a wonderful gift

Here’s your goal so go for it! Just be careful not to make it only about the destination, you need to enjoy the journey too! You have economics knowledge so use it to spend less (eg rent) or make more money. Start with small steps and as you get more confident make the steps bigger and bigger. You also need energy and food to be able to enjoy this life, it’s a necessity. How can you enjoy getting what you want without energy and good health. I’d start there, it will give you more energy to actually move towards your goals.

You are the way you act. Because you’re in the process of changing, it still doesn’t feel authentic. Once you created a habit of acting the new way, you’ll start doing it without thinking and it will become very authentic.