Beeflamb

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About Beeflamb

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  1. You can live like a monk without actually becoming a monk. Just made a habit of meditating everyday, not watching porn, read Buddhist texts.
  2. I’m an OG Leo fan. Found him after my first LSD trip. And I can’t deny that I’ve been there alongside him through his awakenings. I feel like I’ve gone through the journey with him. Not just Leo, but also Frank Yang, and the whole collective unconscious. Although we’ve never met, there is definitely something transmuted through this magical thing called the internet. Leo doesn’t post much these days on YouTube and I feel like I understand why. I understand it, but in my own way, in my own flavor. Just wanted to share that.
  3. It's very difficult for me to imagine myself working a standard job i.e UI UX designer, teacher, programmer, police officer, salesman ect... I feel like I need to pusue a career that is completely outside of the standard job market. Something that doesn't really have a label. Basically I just want to do my ow thing. But I also don't want to be poor. Should I go for it?
  4. it's weird. Sometimes I see someone living an interesting life and I'll be like, yeah that can be me. And I'll just sorta jump back and forth feeling like I'm just an empty center waiting to be filled, and that I can become a new me. This is especially true when I'm in social situations and I just naturally adapt to the energy I'm in. I feel like there's no base of me anymore. It's very freeing, but also really weird and it's hard for me to decide what it is I actually want to do and who it is I want to be. I just want to be everything.
  5. I know this may sound egoic but I have a sense that since I've been following a lot of Leo's content for a while, had been on my own spiritual journey, consume a ton of this type of content and am an avid reader, dived deep into psychedelics, I feel as though I am "above" much of the world. The average American seems almost idiotic to me and most of the stuff pushed out by popular culture I can barely stomache anymore because I just feel it is so below me. BUT, I know we are all one. Everyone is a reflection of me. But idk, it just seems to me that much of the world is just absolutely oblivious to what is really going on here. But at the same time I don't feel like I've achieved any real success yet in life. Getting a high paying job is really hard for me. Starting a business is hard. Going to grad school is hard. Finding my purpose is hard. It's weird. Perhaps I am the idiot here. So what are we guys? Are we deep, intellectual seekers with an understanding of the deepest sacred knowledge or are we a bunch of loonies? Or are we perhaps both?
  6. I consider myself to have an abnormally high sex drive. Its annoying at times but it I find it really hard to control that urge and it really can dictate a lot of my life decisions. For example many of my decisions will be made by how it will help me in getting laid. This is a really deep feeling within me and I am always trying to deny this but to be honest it is the truth. It has been this way since Iwas 16 years old and I am realizing I lost a lot of potential in life because of this. I've been trying nofap and the longest I could go for was 2 weeks, but honestly I didn't feel much different. Is it worth pursuing nofap or is it just going to make me more sexually frustrated?
  7. I found that you have to actually set an intention to meet and date women and put yourself out there, otherwise you end up in a comfortable shell by yourself. Nobody will ever come into your life until you intentionally get out there and make bold moves.
  8. This is somewhat sad but something I have realized is that if a family member were to die I wouldn't really feel much emotionally. I feel as though I've gotten so detatched from my feelings and emotions that I feel somewhat numb about everything. Does anyone else feel this way?
  9. It's quite different, but porn can sometimes be better. It really depends on the person. If you can connect with the right person sex can be completely out of this world amazing experience.
  10. Anyone have the experience of losing everything financially and having to start over from scratch in your 30s? In a way I feel this is actually a good opportunity, because this is going to force me to be really uncomfortable and struggle and it is helping me let go of attachments and limiting mindsets about money. Before I was living a more stable life slowly saving up money each month but I'm realizing that lifestyle was in a way a trap on its own. The issue now is that I'm just working back in a dead end entry-level job and am feeling a bit dead inside. Luckily I'm quitting next month and going to pursue some huge goals of mine of becoming a world traveling Youtuber. My intuition feels strongly about this new endevour, although of course this is going to be another huge risk financially. How do you manage risks in life? I feel like as I get older and more spiritual I'm really opening up to life but I'm not sure if this is just taking it to extreme.
  11. guys. I need help. I had a spiritual awakening in 2018. After that I recall my life was flowing quite smoothly with the universe. I felt like I wasn't putting much effort into anything but cool exciting things were happening. I was living life on my own terms. Things were manifesting. Life was good. These days I dont feel that flow as much anymore and its a little depressing. I feel someone numb, somewhat drained, and I feel like im putting in more effort but nothing is happening as a result of this effort. Perhaps it is my job, perhaps it is my relationship, but I just feel stuck and deeply alone now, unable to progress and I know the key element I am missing is a flow or divine connection with the universe. How can I get back there again? I miss it dearly
  12. just out of curiosity I would like to hear some examples. So if you dont mind could you please share your career path so far, where you think it will go in the future, and your current financial situation. Any other details would be great too. I just find it easier to figure out my life when I get inspired by others
  13. So far Ive got teaching online and I am working on building my Youtube channel. What are some other good sources of online income that are relatively unsaturated and would work with a spiritually creative INTP type personality. I dont mind hard work and putting in long hours. I just cant work in a office environment. It really drains my energy
  14. I've been looking into ways of making money online recently, as I am finding it increasingly difficult to work in an office environment. One thing I have been doing is teaching online. The pay is garbage, but at least I feel like Im doing a good service. I have researched other ways like doing remote sales, starting a finance youtube channel, selling products online. The issue is my soul keeps feeling like it is dying everytime I make money the focus. I get a deep intuitive feeling that I should not be "evil" by trying to take money from people and I should instead focus on spiritual pursuits and love. Its making me feel very conflicted, as if I am stuck and cant move. Do I follow the money, or do I follow my gut? And if I follow my gut, is everything going to be ok?
  15. I asked this question on reddit but generallly not a fan of reddit so thought i would get some higher quality answers here. And that is... How do you choose between living a practical life, and a magical one where you pursue your wild dreams? I've been a teacher for the past 7 years. It pays the bills, I can live somewhat comfortablely, I can go to school and whatnot to up my qualifications but it is not fulfilling. I dont enjoy the work and it isnt in alignment with my highest calling. What fills me with purpose and joy is creation. Online content, videos, editing, sharing spiritual insights on TikTok and whatnot lol. I know some people have success with this and can actually monetize it but im pretty much starting at zero. Its a wild dream but I love it. So the problem is. Im 31 years old. My attention is always split between wild content creator dreams and furthering my teaching career and making some money. This fight back and forth between the practical and the crazy dream vision is challenging, because I dont know where I should be focusing my attention. I know I can technically do both but I feel like my energy is not enough to pursue both things at the same time. I perform better when I have a single focus with a clear vision. What are your thoughts on this? Do you go all in on your dreams? Or do you come to terms with the matrix games we have to play in order to eat, sleep, pay the bills? How do you find your balance. I am interested to hear your thoughts.