Widdle Puppy

Yes, I think so too. It requires mind & thought, emotions and then a body which it is able to claim as it's own. I'm then trying to understand how consciousness comes into all of this.

if i was to be honest I chase women who are very hot to me and who gratify me and make me think I'm valuable and cool or whatever

I have this as a tension in my chest. I changes sometimes to fire and burning. I also feel a similar sensation on my face, cheeks, and in my brain. It melted away once after days of meditating and felt like a wound being drained of infection. It comes bak though.

Yes, it's a paradox which confuses me and I see runs deep as well. It feels like sometimes I have this effortless effort while other times it feels like I'm doing everything, trying to hard and full of tension. So I'm supposed to give a strong effort but it should be effortless. Effortless effort. So the ego isn't the mind which are thoughts and the act of thinking and labeling. The ego isn't the body which is I suppose reality and our connection to this reality is our awareness, physical sensations, our senses. I'm confused about what the ego even is sometimes.

Perhaps, for me it's information that's just not relevant to me right now I feel like I'm taking in too much information. I need to take in less theory, be more pragmatic and focus on realistic things in my life, and also focus spiritually and for my own growth on making sure I'm doing the best meditative practice I have. Basically I need to stop listening to what's being said outside and focus on what's going on inside with what I've learned so far.

I don't understand either and I'm coming from a place of anger. Logically I agree and through some direct experience I have generated my own understanding of this but still I'm confused and angry. I don't want to change and I don't know why.

I don't want to change because I'm afraid what lies outside it. I've been going deep with my personal development work and have been framing it more so in terms of spiritual growth and obtaining peace of mind and liberation. Having this as my vision makes it hard because I honestly am not sure I want to break this cycle. my entire life feels like a distraction and I don't understand what I have to do to get where I should be and I'm full of so much doubt about my process. who to trust if I'm supposed to doubt but I'm also supposed to trust? I don't understand...

Much of the journey is deriving these truths for yourself. Different people may be at different stages or coming at it from different angles thus contradicting or clashing with your understanding or maps of it all.

Seeing these contradictions and accepting paradox is part of this whole magnificent journey. Deriving a reconciliation between them is then another part of it all. One thing that I've become aware of lately is the quality of something. It's like coming full circle and reaching a new understanding. Leo talked about this in his victim mindset video but what stood out to me was the similarities between being a victim and in a state of blindness and suffering vs being in a state of balance, awareness and acceptance. I think this relates to meaning and morality. It's existence is a paradox and there is a greater understanding and embodiment you can have of these concepts where they don't actually exist, but they exist. Simply believing in rules, meaning and morality isn't what makes it exist. It perhaps exists in a different way than how we think it exists.

Hi, I'm starting next August my own buisness. It's terrifying. I'm looking for some worksheets, framework, brainstorming exercises, how to set expectations, etc I want to map out this whole endeavour in my OneNote and set some goals and expectations and think on how I can make it successful but I'm feeling a bit lost on how to go about doing this! Any help on brainstorming and planning please!!

Preface: I can get numbers and dates with women. This part isn't a problem for me. I can set up at least one to three dates a week if I wanted and if free time allows. I feel reasonably confident in my conversation skills and connecting through them. So here is my problem... My hang up is building attraction during dates, expressing my attraction in an open, vulnerable and confident way and building up to a kiss. Perhaps this can be called a fear of intimacy? I can start building attraction lightly when on a date through a little touch and also through conversation but as it starts to rise and gets higher and higher I feel anxious, confused, uncertain, brain chatter, some fear or worry and worst of all a fight/flight emotion will sometimes kick in making me completely numb and unable to continue on building attraction or escalating in any way. The intensity of these emotions will be much more higher and intense with a woman I really like. I've been getting in touch with my emotions and building awareness around them lately so I'm starting to just put this puzzle together and understand what is going on here. I may not entirely understand the problem here and all it's inner workings but I mostly get the gist of it and see what's happening from big picture mode. I did some sentence exercises where I thought about some situations and emotions I had when it felt like it wasn't possible to move in on a girl I liked. "I like this girl. I want us to share our sexuality with each other but... I'm afraid she will hurt me. I'm afraid she wont like me and wont want to be friends either. it's better to just be friends so she doesn't leave. she wont like the real me. it's too late she doesn't like you anymore. she is going to make it hard and try to sabotage me on purpose so it doesn't happen." So I'm aware I have some emotional issues and blocks in this domain of life. I'm intaking theory but where I feel stuck is what are some pragmatic approaches on how to start changing this behavior and freeing up my emotions, clearing blocks and fears of intimacy and being comfortable with these emotions for a person???

what are some good date coaches ?

I wasn't talking about a girl going in for a kiss with me but my own emotional inability to go in for a kiss with her. Yes, I feel like I've had plenty of situations ripe with opportunity to go in for a kiss or build up to one but having experienced the emotions in the OP I did not do so. regret, guilt and a feeling or powerlessness followed after the date ended usually.

Thanks! what's the last one mean by ducks?

I think this is a pretty good post and similar to my thoughts on it. I've started watching RSD stuff and not everything I necessarily agree with regarding their approach or their model but still there is useful information and I am always trying to push myself out of my own information bubble and at least take on another perspective. I would say RSD stuff is great for social skills and kinda having a model to follow and channel your positive energy through since interacting with women after all can be a skill in and of itself. There is much better material for "inner game" or "self work" though but I'm fine with watching some RSD vids, keeping and open mind, picking the parts I find helpful and letting go of the rest. You don't have to agree 100% with every teacher. I would say probably the best information intake you can have is a wide range of teachers where you agree with some more than others. Self work shouldn't be treated like a dogma. Keep an open mind and integrate the parts which align with your values.

The life purpose course is not a quick fix solution or something tangible. It isn't a how-to guide teaching you how to make a million dollars. If it doesn't work for you it's because you didn't make it work. These courses channel independent work and assurance from yourself and your own values. It's a map of mysterious terrain to a destination, not a ticket on a plane there. No such transportation exists to get you to this destination, just maps.

This video was incredibly helpful to me. I basically use my journal every day. For me I'm unsure how I would be able to progress without notes or a journal of some kind. You need something to keep your theory in order, insights you have, plans, values, etc. Watch this video, set one up, and use it. immensely helpful

jordan peterson is a joke and a thought leader for deeply misguided people. remember yall, watch your information intake. leo has a video on this. nathaniel branden - 6 pillars of self esteem john bradshaw - healing the shame that binds you brad blanton - radical honesty

Not much will change. He will continue making videos and developing theory and programs for self and enlightenment work. He is aligned with his life purpose and his videos will only keep getting better.

So I have this problem that I can tell is one of my blocks/challenges. I can tell it is interconnected to fears of mine and emotions relating to them, the past, uncertainty of the future, etc. I've done some journaling on this. To be more specific why I'm making this thread it is hard for me to be emotionally open with women and I think with my family. Like I have built up some awareness and can tell on different levels I numb myself, put a block up, take on a role, or do something like this that keeps me from being vulnerable and emotionally open and accepting. It feels like I can make a move with women and date them to the point of physical pleasure but it's like I'm playing this role and it isn't the real me. I'm like suppressing my real emotions and just playing out this role to satisfy a desire. I'm making this thread for some advice on how to start tackling these blocks, numbing and emotions that arise in the moment that keep me from being emotionally open. I'm looking for theory, books, advice, approaches, etc. I realize I'm going to have to start putting myself in more situations where I'm emotionally open and face these situations the best I can with as much awareness and openness as possible. Does anyone have a blueprint to go about doing this?

This video by @Leo Gura really helped me today after a very hard day yesterday. I have been practicing meditation and awareness but I also think I've be unconscious and confused by my emotions and ignoring them and haven't really ever explored them. My current mood or what I'm feeling is always permeated by this sense of numbness and this slight headache, block, or fog that keeps me from feeling comfortable with what I'm feeling. I'm aware of this sort of identity or mechanical system I am that operates around this numbness. I want to start breaking through it an feel fully and comfortable all the emotions I have so I can make better decisions. I fee like right now I act very unconsciously whenever a negative emotion arrises such as worrying and fear. It's liek I've created this barrier to protect myself from painful emotions. I'm afraid of what will happen when it becomes weaker and weaker. Will everything pour out and will I lose my mind? It's scary

To build on this I don't think you will even be understood by everyone if you are lost in delusion, emotionally cold and not doing self work. it's an ideal that isn't achievable.

Hmm, ok. I've actually done vipassanna meditation before and it has been healing in a way where I it has made me more aware I am more accepting of what I'm experiencing in the moment but also I've noticed there is this big ice berg in my mind where I'm acting based on it and something beneath it but the iceberg is keeping me from feeling the emotions for what's bellow and healing there. I think I should do some more research on more emotion based techniques of meditation and theory. Are there any specific books you recommend?

I've noticed a not button for me is Night clubs. They make me turn to stone. I used to not be so aware of what is happening but with a bit of a built up awareness I've realized that this is a situation which releases a lot of insecurities for me. I don't feel any kind of excitement or fun feeling in clubs, just this serious cold feeling. I think it comes down to an image issue. I'm afraid of looking like a fool in the club or trying to connect with someone and being hurt or being vulnerable by openly enjoying the situation and being hurt somehow. Anyone deal with nightclub anxiety?

I don't think so since they would be so focused on their desires like food, sex, etc. They have an ego I believe but it is far less complex than what we as people have. Who knows if they can become enlightened but they would have to meditate to do so, observing their body and experience in an objective way. I'm not sure animals have complex enough thought to do this.