In dating and Relationships what makes a quality guy?

[Princess Arabia]

Just now, Thought Art said:

@Princess Arabia
 

There is definitely some kind of asymmetry in our culture between the expectations of a man and a women. Even though, this woman earns more than me… I have to pay for the date and her getting home. But, I don’t pay for her ride to the date for some reason. 
 

These boundaries and expectations are completely arbitrary. 

Forget about culture. You're putting culture into this. What about you as a person. How do you show your love. Do you want her to feel safe, protected and cared for, whether gf or not. She spent time with you, you spent time with her at least make sure she, as a woman gets home safely, whether you want to see her again, unless she showed you some utter disrespect. Don't go by what you think she's doing and your insecure stories. Go by what is actually happening.

[Thought Art]

@Princess Arabia I added more to the post. I’m slowly coming around. 

[Princess Arabia]

10 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

@Princess Arabia I added more to the post. I’m slowly coming around. 

There's nothing to come around to. You're only frustrating yourself even more by putting monetary value on dates. She's not. She didn't asked you to pay for her coming to the date. She only asked to pay for the cab fare home. If you can't afford to pay for cab fare, offer to meet her close to her house walking distance. If she refuses, then that's a criteria to probably know it's not about you but what you can pay for. You have to take fear out the picture. Fear will lead you to make irrational decisions. 

Edited December 7, 2023 by Princess Arabia

[Thought Art]

@Princess Arabia She asked me to buy the tickets, and to buy the Uber…

She also technically, asked me to go to the movies. 
 

Anyway,

I don’t have money to spend. I just don’t have it at this time. So, I am going to date more cheaply for the time being. 
 

Money does matter to me. It’s not really up to someone else to decide how I should see things. 
 

I’ll use my heart, mind and intuition going forward. 
 

I agree on the fear thing. I will need to risk being more vulnerable. More dates will help with that.

Edited December 7, 2023 by Thought Art

[Thought Art]

I think also… being a quality guy means having my shit together. Having my finances in order, my career in order. So, in that regard there’s gonna be a gap in time before I can actualize these things. I need to get debt free, meet my savings goals and increase my income. So, I’m more focused on getting experience even if I fail a bunch in the dating game.. 

Edited December 7, 2023 by Thought Art

[Princess Arabia]

5 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

It’s not really up to someone else to decide how I should see things. 

You're right. It's up to your belief systems and thought patterns. Not me, not even you as a fictional character. You're being driven by those things. Which is ok, me too. It's just I'm more apt to trying to adopt belief systems that serve me and how Source sees me, rather than previous conditionings that hasn't served me well in the past. Outside conditions doesn't matter. 

 

[Princess Arabia]

8 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

I think also… being a quality guy means having my shit together. Having my finances in order, my career in order

Those things are effects. What needs to get in order first is what you identify as. Do you identify as a broke guy. Someone who can't afford this or that? Or someone who is abundant and can afford a cab fare. Because if you do, the cab fare, being a container that's easily doable, will find it's way to you. You'll be surprised how this works. I'm practicing this principle and it's amazing the results. Different content, of course, but same principle. 

You cannot jump to being able to afford a limousine ride at first. The mind needs to adjust, but start with small things and I promise, you'll see things start to change.

[Thought Art]

@Princess Arabia I don’t know. 
 

I will meet her, a soul mate in time. I’m doing the inner outer work for that to happen. Been reading a book on soul mates. I have other on attachment theory, love languages, etc

 

As a man I need to set up my foundation.

 

I was a starving artist hippy, but I’m become more fully founded over time as I mature.

[Thought Art]

@Princess Arabia Finance isn’t feelings or beliefs. 
 

Sure, they affect how you treat finance but finance, cash flow, income and expenses are brutal truths. This time next year I’ll be mostly debt free. Then I’ll pay for her Uber. 
 

Finance, is math. And when things are as tight as they are for me and I’m trying to get debt free so I don’t die on the Walmart floor… yeah. 

Edited December 7, 2023 by Thought Art

[Thought Art]

Looking at my account with -300 dollars in it. 
 

hmm, believe thought Art! Believe! I’m rich!!

[Princess Arabia]

15 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

@Princess Arabia I don’t know. 
 

I will meet her, a soul mate in time. I’m doing the inner outer work for that to happen. Been reading a book on soul mates. I have other on attachment theory, love languages, etc

 

As a man I need to set up my foundation.

 

I was a starving artist hippy, but I’m become more fully founded over time as I mature.

Good for you. Just don't get caught up in the outside world. Soul mates are still coming from within you. You are creating that soul mate. You don't need a soul mate outside there. Anyone can be a soul mate. It will all depend on your embodiment. Have you bonded with your own soul. That's your soul mate, I've found mine. It was never lost. I'm just trying to develop a better relationship with it , as I have neglected it for so long. Didn't realize it was so close. It's me. Now I'm seeing through the facade. I'm seeing how it was me all along. All me. Then I can share myself with presumed others and become one with them and play the game of a soul mate being there with me. 

Edited December 7, 2023 by Princess Arabia

[Princess Arabia]

8 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

income and expenses are brutal truths.

Tear up a dollar bill into pieces, is that brutal Truth? Stop believing these things. They are not brutal truths. How you feel about them determines how they relate to you. If you told me I was brutal, I wouldn't want to come around you. Why should money be any different. It's all energy.

[Princess Arabia]

8 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

Looking at my account with -300 dollars in it. 
 

hmm, believe thought Art! Believe! I’m rich!!

Belief isn't it. The feeling is the secret. Feel it. You can try to believe all you wan't. Without feeling it's just words. 

[Javfly33]

I´m having a blast reading you two. Keep it up. 😀 Is like a stand up but two 😆

[Thought Art]

@Princess Arabia Belief plays a role for sure. 
 

But, also it can back fire… check out this life coaches financial audit…

I believe I’m developing the habits and skills that will lead to me being wealthy. Instead of believing something, I want to see reality clearly. 
 

Money is brutal. Doesn’t mean bad. It just means it’s very very stark and real. 
 

But, if I have 0$ and I go to the store… I’m not gonna feel my way into 100$ worth of groceries….

 

Accountants and professional money managers tend to be pessimistic leaning, highly pragmatic, critical thinking and calculated. They look at the brutal truth of the situation first, then values, goals, interests, law of attraction or whatever second. 

Edited December 7, 2023 by Thought Art

[Princess Arabia]

52 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

@Princess Arabia Belief plays a role for sure. 
 

But, also it can back fire… check out this life coaches financial audit…

I believe I’m developing the habits and skills that will lead to me being wealthy. Instead of believing something, I want to see reality clearly. 
 

Money is brutal. Doesn’t mean bad. It just means it’s very very stark and real. 
 

But, if I have 0$ and I go to the store… I’m not gonna feel my way into 100$ worth of groceries….

 

Accountants and professional money managers tend to be pessimistic leaning, highly pragmatic, critical thinking and calculated. They look at the brutal truth of the situation first, then values, goals, interests, law of attraction or whatever second. 

I'm checking out my own direct experiences. I don't just watch and listen to outside stimulants. I observe my own. No way to prove ones beliefs. I know my own and how they work. Thatls why I go within more than out.

[Thought Art]

@Princess Arabia I guess I find a balance

[Princess Arabia]

32 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

@Princess Arabia I guess I find a balance

More than that. Have to get to know yourself and how the Universe works. You are the Universe. Stop seeing yourself as a separate entity. You will get lost. Presumably. You are already a part of what balances the Universe. Just have to align with it.

Edited December 7, 2023 by Princess Arabia

[Thought Art]

@Princess Arabia Well, I am spending time looking at my income and expenses for this week. No money for Dates, or ubers. So, I need to increase my income. Which is why I am studying cyber Security, and working on my life purpose. 

This is why I will likely plant trees to pay off all my debt this summer/fall.... It's hard work but. Debt free living means I can take girls on nice dates.

Not magical thinking. That is what got me into this mess in the first place.

[Princess Arabia]

Just now, Thought Art said:

@Princess Arabia Well, I am spending time looking at my income and expenses for this week. No money for Dates, or ubers. So, I need to increase my income. Which is why I am studying cyber Security, and working on my life purpose. 

This is why I will likely plant trees to pay off all my debt this summer/fall.... It's hard work but. Debt free living means I can take girls on nice dates.

Not magical thinking. That is what got me into this mess in the first place.

Don't look at your income and expenses. Focus on what you would like to see. Keep those in the background running, but don't focus on that. Focus on the end result. Feel it. Don't take my word, try it. Give it time to blossom. You are giving life to your current circumstances. Give life to what you want and it will surely come to pass.