April's 30th.

[Sabth]

Its 5:22AM now and I feel very fresh and in comfort. I feel gratitude towards life. Suddenly it's loud here. I just want to enjoy this silence. Maybe I'm a little late...

I'm tired of having a casual encounters I want to have a forever lasting relationships. It waste my time..

[Sabth]

I am currently so bored with life. 

[Sabth]

I want a job that do well even if I get old... 

I wanna get up early in the morning and go to work. Preferably that had a lot of walk. Investigative work. Or like a social study. Studying a city. Just walk around. Like I always used to. 

Edited June 27, 2023 by Sabth

[Sabth]

 

I may wanna try eating only fruits diet. (Suffering.)

 

 

Edited June 27, 2023 by Sabth

[Sabth]

I'm feeling very terrible now. For unknown causes.

[Sabth]

I vomit.

I'm fasting. Then eat coconut drink and mangoes. Then couldn't find the best way/position to sleep no matter what. Then wake up. Then vomit. 

[Sabth]

What if I'm ugly?

Now I've become a little bit better in health. Just a little bit. 

And I had this thought. What if I'm ugly? I shall date someone who is good looking so that my child wouldn't be ugly. 

And there is the age factor. I may be ugly because of old age. So if a baby, anything baby would restore that beauty back again. In this case I shouldn't be worried. Cuz I can always bring someone who's young and pretty into this world. Even though I'm getting older. I can create beauty. If. I said if. How do you find a good match so that your child would be pretty? 

 

I got a feeling that if you date a younger guy your child would be pretty. Genetics.  I'm sick now?

.

.

.

Know that I already had a nephew. What can I do to him and her. 

I'm feeling a lot better now. 5:47PM

[Sabth]

I really don't know what to do with my /precious/ life. 

[Sabth]

I am so bored with life now. 

[Sabth]

 

 

[Sabth]

My life is weird. 

I really wanna re live my childhood back in x. 

[Sabth]

 

 

[Sabth]

I am trapped and have no freedom. 

[Sabth]

Kai is in the army. 

[Sabth]

Fourth time of the year. That I'm travelling. I wonder if I'm wasting my time mindlessly. 

Again. Just to the same place. 

 

Edited July 6, 2023 by Sabth

[Sabth]

I can't wait to have my own children. Really? 

[Sabth]

I hope in 2023 I will do well. 

[Sabth]

I try to imagine Jonghyun's voice with rescue me song.

It must suit perfectly. 

[Sabth]

Today, the programme had finished and tomorrow I will be going back home. It's a four day stay. What I learn from this trip... Nothings much. But I love going back here. Usually I'll be tired. But not this time. Only a little bit. 

[Sabth]

I still didn't know how to make money. There's still nothings much going on in my life. No growth. I went to a wedding and it shows of somebody else's growth. Maybe I should look for work when I came back home this time. I don't know how to survive at home.