When is it appropriate to make sexual remarks about a woman's body?

[DefinitelyNotARobot]

It feels like the line between it being creepy and it being hot is very thin. The other day I saw another guy say something along the lines of "I like to see you shake it baby" to a woman walking by. I thought that she would in no way find that hot, but she actually turned around to him and laughed. That was actually quiet an interesting insight.

Fast forward a week or so and I'm at this club. I drank just enough alcohol to be in this beautiful state of flow. I'm dancing and talking to people and having a fun time. I notice this woman eyeing me from time to time. I was just making eye contact with her a few times (I didn't approach her because I'm trying to focus on the basics right now, which is to learn how to make proper eye contact which is what I was doing that at the night club).

At one point she walks past me and I'm like (in a funny accent) "Damn you look so beautiful". She completely ignored that and didn't seem to be interested in my remark. As I look after her I notice that she's got a beautiful ass! So I did what I would've never done in a sober state, because I wouldn't have thought that it could work and would've felt like a weirdo instead, which is to just say what I thought in that moment out loud. I said (in the same funny accent): "But god damn your ass makes you even more beautiful!", to which she (and her friend) actually reacted by turning around and giggling. She said: "Hehe thank you!" and her face lit up. Like she actually liked that? The hell? I think it worked because I was just saying my thoughts out loud without expecting anything back in return. It was just a very authentic moment for me.

Later that night I saw another woman dancing. As I walked past her I just tried a similar thing, which was to smile and tell her that her body was really hot (which it was). She also liked that! She smiled at me, looked me up and down and said that mine was hot too! I probably could've initiated something right then and there, but I didn't really feel in the mood for that, so I smiled said: "Thanks" and kept going on.

This was such an eye opening experience, because it showed me that there actually IS a right time and place to make remarks such as this. But that's the point. I was in a night club and there already is sexual energy (and alcohol) in the air. I also feel like I was smooth and chill enough to not have it be creepy. If I had been very tense and serious (like if I hadn't done the funny accent) it might not have had the same effect. I was just totally feeling my energy.

Now that brings me back to the first part. The guy who made a remark about a random woman walking down the street. I feel like it's easy to do this in a socially uncalibrated way where you just make the woman feel uncomfortable and creeped out by your vibe. So how do you manage to toe this line?

I feel like these were some of the most powerful responses I've gotten from giving women random compliments, and it felt very freeing because it came from such an authentic place. It just felt good for me and the women. And that's what I want, because being able to make them feel good makes me feel good. But I realize that you can't do this to any woman at any time in any place. The vibes have to be right. So how do you know when it's appropriate to do so and when it's not? Does it just happen with experience? Do you have to burn yourself a couple of times before you can get it right? I don't want a woman to start making a scene (which would be understandable if I did it in an uncalibrated way).

Edited April 28, 2023 by DefinitelyNotARobot

[M A J I]

 

[Spiral]

I generally try to it avoid entirely.

[DefinitelyNotARobot]

@Spiral Probably the safe thing to do. But I'm trying to understand why it works when it works.

[integral]

 Its seems you already answered the question, its not what you say its how you say it within the right setting. 

Edited May 1, 2023 by integral