Help

[sda]

I joined an online academy to help me prepare for my entrance test for my university. Its kind of like a teaching centre. I paid them the initial amount and they kept on charging me as time was going. However, unexpectedly, my mom had a fight with the person who was in charge of academy by yelling at him due to them forgetting to mention the full price. Hence, they forgot to mention the full price by like 50 dollars due to the delivery charges.
 

As a result, the person who was in charge of academy, suspended me, refused to give me any books for the money which I already paid him and refused to give me refund. I don't have problem in leaving the academy but I do have a problem in the money I invested in the academy. I invested so much money in the academy which is equivalent to hundreds of US dollars relative to the country where I live in as I am poor with my family.
 

Now, I am suspended, from the academy, due to my mom and I cannot get my money refunded. I have invested a lot of money in the academy, which has all been wasted because the academy suspended me due to a fight that took place between the academy and my parents. 

I feel scared due to this and I feel like a lot of growth oppurtunities have vanished. I am attached to the money because I don't like spending my parents money. I don't like spending my parents money because I don't like leeching off them. My both parents calls me so many bad words and may also cancel my admission to university due to this situation I am in.                                            
 

I will really appreciate if anyone can give me any solutions or ideas for the situation I am in. 
 

Thank you

Edited September 23, 2022 by sda

[NoSelfSelf]

These things are out of your hands.

Focusing on what you can do and ignore what you can't is only thing i can suggest...

[Osaid]

2 hours ago, sda said:

I will really appreciate if anyone can give me any solutions or ideas for the situation I am in. 

First thing you need to do is establish a baseline sense of self-worth and self-acceptance. You can't count on the people around you to be emotionally developed enough to carefully consider the words and languages that come out of their mouth. They are gonna be fearful and their doubts and anxieties will creep into your mind if you are not grounded enough in your own self-worth. You have to have enough love and respect for yourself to not let other people's lack of development hinder you and your focus. Being worried and having anxiety about something that you can't even control is not productive and it will harm you further. Yeah ok, your mom kind of screwed things up and she might even blame you for it, you should not even consider falling into that line of reasoning or even entertaining it, you should realize that playing a blame game and swearing at people is just unproductive and low-consciousness. Your focus should be on how to calm your mom down or how to de-escalate the situation, instead of pulling yourself into the delusion. You have to be the mature one here and ask yourself what is the best way to handle this from a big picture perspective, instead of rushing into the argument in an attempt to prove yourself to them. It's a more holistic and detached perspective that comes from realizing that worrying and being self-deprecating wont help with anything. You yourself know deep down that it wasn't really your fault, and that you simply misunderstood the situation, and that you do not deserve hate. Tap into that. Ground yourself in that. You simply did what you thought was best. Don't let others gaslight you into self-hate. Keep that feeling strong, that feeling is truth.

Your goal should instead be: How can I de-escalate the situation? How can I control my parent's emotions? What tangible and practical steps can I take from here to take back control over the situation? What is there to learn from this situation? What is the Universe trying to teach me? How can something like this be prevented from happening again?

I can relate to feeling bad about spending your parent's money. They probably worked hard for it. I get it. For me, that feeling went away once I started making some money. It grounded me more in the value of money. You just have to accept what has happened and realize that feeling guilty about it is not gonna benefit you. You guys already considered what spending 50 dollars might do for you, and you decided to take the risk, and that was the best you could do with the knowledge you had at the time, and that's the end of it. Learn from it and move on. That's the best you can do. You can still extract 50 dollars worth of value simply by learning from and contemplating your situation. There are valuable lessons to take in, and then those lessons will ripple into a butterfly affect which will help you massively in other areas of your life.

 

Edited September 23, 2022 by Osaid

[integral]

What profession are you looking to get into?

Everything you need is on the internet now for free, become self-thought and learn skills independently. 

[sda]

1 hour ago, integral said:

What profession are you looking to get into?

I am looking to get into medicine. I am looking to become a doctor. FYI, to become a doctor one needs to have a medical degree and cannot 100 percent rely on the internet.