Casual sex - harmless or dangerous?

23 posts in this topic

@Knowledge Hoarder

14 minutes ago, Knowledge Hoarder said:

Overall, benefits heavilly outnumber the risks - it's just that most people are too paranoid and only focus on the risks. And they are masivelly brainwashed by society, claiming that "casual sex is a big no no" and "if you have too much sex, you won't be able to have stable and happy relationships in the future". Which is all, of course, a bunch of horseshit.

Interesting. What kind of benefits are you referring to here?

Also, I can't relate to the whole "society claiming that casual sex is a big no-no" statement you made. At least for where I live and have spent my whole life (Norway), casual hookups are very much standard practice. It's also expected by the culture here that you should approach sex as nothing more than bodily pleasure. At least for guys, and perhaps for girls as well. In my experience, it's expected that you use Tinder and should work to have many casual sex encounters in order to achieve social status. Romance is pretty much dead, and in many cases, something people cringe about.

I've also heard some convincing arguments that people end up cynical and bitter in the long run by treating themselves as a casual partner, which of course does affect any serious relationship. I'm gonna guess the logic behind this is that you train yourself to view yourself as a casual partner, and you have to train yourself to become a serious partner in the aftermath. Probably not impossible to have stable and happy relationships in the future after a casual sex lifestyle, but I'm guessing that it perhaps is gonna be at least a bigger challenge.

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@Knowledge Hoarder

17 minutes ago, Knowledge Hoarder said:

Well, I mean, for starters, sexual variety? Idk, even that one benefit is enough for me tbh. But I guess there are some mental benefits as well - you're likely to be less judgemental, less fearfull/shy, etc.

I think I agree with sexual variety as a benefit, although I'm not entirely sure if this is my opinion yet. I suspect I might be ignorant of the potential consequences of attainment of sexual variety. In regards to becoming less judgemental and fearful or shy, I think this can be a benefit, especially to those who are overly judgemental and fearful/shy. But these individuals I suspect are aware of the possible "dangers" of this lifestyle, so the choice wouldn't necessarily be naive. For people who mindlessly choose this lifestyle and are ignorant of the potential consequences, I suspect are living naively - which I believe not to be good. I think it's a good idea to have standards of who you choose to engage with sexually. In a casual relationship, the selectivity process isn't really based on high standards in many cases. It's more like "I'm gonna sleep with any girl who is gonna be willing to sleep with me"
I would also add another benefit, that people (at least men) can really experience higher levels of confidence through this lifestyle. I wouldn't argue that it's nothing to be recognized as an attractive mate to women. Sexual experience is probably also another benefit. 


28 minutes ago, Knowledge Hoarder said:

Hook up culture is slowly, but surely comming here - and it's here to stay.

For this point, I'm not entirely convinced that a liberal approach to sex is ideal. This is the reason I ask these questions. We have been through the "moralizing and conservative" phase, and have drawn the knowledge out of what is not acceptable in this approach. Now that we are going through this liberal approach, I'm trying to figure out if this is really a good idea or not. If it's not, I'm not sure it should stay anywhere in a strict sense. We have to draw the wisdom from the phase though.


32 minutes ago, Knowledge Hoarder said:

You have to have proper expectations while attempting to do anything in this world. Again, this is just people's imaturity, in my opinion.

Yeah, I agree with this. This is why this discussion is pretty relevant today. Here's a thought: What if we are not able to deal with the responsibilities of sex? I think it's interesting that limiting sex has now moved across the political spectrum, as the right wanted sex to be more restrictive and arguing through religion, for instance. Now the left is also trying to limit sex, by trying to demand consent before engaging in sexual activities as a law. 

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