March 9

[Preety_India]

Yesterday I was talking about loving radiance and how we need to be closer to it. 

Loving Radiance is what we need 

 

And then I talked about how evil and devil does not exist. But toxins and poisons do and what you choose is your free will. 

You either choose the optimal or the regular or the toxic. That's up to you. 

When you move away from loving radiance you eventually degrade. 

It's like if you forgot to clean your house, sooner or later it gets invaded by pests. 

Toxic elements begin to gather and impact a system once you fail to fortify it with loving radiance. 

This loving radiance is nothing but infinite love. That I talk about in the ultimate truth thread. 

 

 

[Preety_India]

Sewing my concepts together. 

1. Self love 
2. Heartspace 
3. Loving Radiance 
4. Infinite love is the ultimate truth 
5. Embody infinite love 
6. Incorporate and integrate infinite love in your life 
7. Psychic intelligence 
8. Cultivate a garden in your mind and heart 
9. Your mind is the only thing that matters 
10. Poisons exist. Free will exists as well 
11. There is no evil. Only flawed people 
12. Positivity 
13. Organic lifestyle
14. High consciousness 
15. High Conscientiousness 
16. Holistic Sciences 
17. RESPECT, ACCEPT, EMBRACE AND UNDERSTAND OTHER'S PERSPECTIVES

 

 

On the last page I discussed these things 

• solitude mode 
• Dopamine addiction 
• Pet ethics 
• Masculine environment 
• Absolute versus relative perspective, root versus crown Chakra 
• One word - acceptance 

 

 

Edited March 17, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

The last 8 hours were pure torture and absolute misery. 

 

[Preety_India]

I had an argument with him. 

 

[Preety_India]

 

• Aligned with the most optimal and ideal 
• Aligned with the most profound 
• Aligned with the truth 

 

 

[Preety_India]

I have been traumatized by male behavior and by the men in my life. 

Deeply mistreated and traumatized 

 

It's hard. 

 

[Preety_India]

5 minutes ago, Benton said:

Are you alright? I know I’m a man. But I can tell that you are going through a tough time right now. And I just wanted to offer what I could. What’s been going on? I know that femininity has been lacking in parts of the world at more masculine levels of development. And this can make expressing femininity and even just being a woman difficult. A lot of the people on this forum are sexually frustrated with women; because they don’t understand them. And they aren’t even in touch with their own femininity. I know it sucks. And I know I’m a guy saying this. But as someone who was SEVERELY lacking in femininity for the longest time. I at least understand that much. I’m sorry your going through what your going through. I know that many people have yet to recognize the value of more feminine ideals. I don’t know what happening in your personal life. But I know I appreciate it when someone notices I’m going through a tough time, and reaches out a hand. You can tell me to just fuck off if I’m intruding. You won’t hurt my feelings. I just wanted to check in with you, and see what’s up and if I can help.

I've been hurt deeply by cheating men, abandoning men, abusive men, unloving men. I'm tired of wanting the love of a man only to be betrayed and mistreated later. I wish a man would love me for who I am and not for who he wants me to be. I wish a man would love me truly and understand me instead of using me for his purposes and then discard once he is bored. I am just fed up of being lead on, lead on, lead on, to believe that I'm receiving love and then being discarded like a puppy on the side of the road from a passing car. I'm broken from within. I desperately need a man's love in my life because I want it, a man's love makes me happy, I don't want to feel alone, I don't want fake men, players and assholes who toy with my feelings, maybe they don't do it on purpose but they do it subconsciously because they aren't sure of what they want or just act on impulse. I want loyalty and secure attachment in return for giving my heart to him. I want a man to love me deeply. To love me truly and not on a whim. I want it bad. I don't wish to be desired by men. I just want the love of one man forever till the end of my life. A beautiful romantic companionship. And only one man and the same man. I want to feel loved and wanted by a man. Like real emotions, real passion and craving for me and only me. Not treat me like a disposable

 

[Preety_India]

6 minutes ago, Benton said:

I can understand that. Serious relationships with women have been hard for me. I have a hard time being that emotionally vulnerable with people. Just in general sometimes. Because I’m afraid of being hurt.

I think the solution to our problem is Self-Love. You don’t need to take this all the way to metaphysical heights. But when I’m in a relationship with someone, and I’m lacking in love and dependent on theirs. Well I’m not contributing. I’m being a vampire. I’m not saying this is the case for you. But if we have genuine love for ourselves we will attract stronger people into our lives who are also like that. And if we have genuine love for ourselves we can see the people who are just vampires. And have the power to not let them into our lives. To not so desperately seek love from another; that we deceive ourselves into thinking that they are genuine to us. And maybe they are, but a genuine vampire is still a vampire.

If we have love for ourself we attract others who are like this. And those people don’t need you to be a certain way. They are satisfied with themselves, they can live you as you are. Not love you because you suit their emotional needs. 
Im sorry you’ve had experiences with men like this. I don’t want to create an idea of trauma around men in your mind. But these experiences can leave us avoidant of that thing that hurt us. And when we do that we shut that part of ourselves out. I am one of those men who has had a disdain for women. I thought that they where all the same. They only want men for: whatever shallow reason I would imagine. I think because I expected those qualities in women I often found them. I became overly masculine as compensation. I though that was what women wanted, and I remember asking one of my female friends. This was a pretty long time ago if I was masculine. And she told me I was too masculine. A lot of the men who aren’t in touch with their femininity want a woman who is sexy but acts masculine (sometimes). And this can be something that is forced on women. I’ve seen Your posts where you are asking about your femininity. I can relate to this because I was lacking in it, and had to figure out my femininity better too. I don’t know what your reasons are for wanting to be more feminine. And I could be way off. But I was wondering if it was you thinking it would make you more attractive? This isn’t necessarily a bad thing. If so what I would recommend is changing your reasons for wanting to be more feminine. From trying to please others to pleasing yourself. Acknowledging this side of yourself so you can honor yourself and be whole. 
I am sorry for your heart ache. But you are an intelligent person. And I think you have what it takes to master your life, and get what you want out of it. 
You can craft it into something beautiful that fits you perfectly. This is Self-Love and it is also a consequence of Self-Love. Also I might add that if you’ve had any awakening insights recently, the ego may look for reasons to put itself into negative states to protect itself. Which ultimately why we get traumatized by things like this. We are protecting ourselves. That doesn’t have to mean that you got upset over this for nothing. It could also just be another factor to keep in mind. I Love you. Because you are me, and I desire healing for myself. 
I want to help you because I understand the hurt.❤️ We’re friends

I don't see any problem with seeking love. It's a basic human need. To love someone with all the heart receive betrayal in return is obviously going to hurt. I wanted to be more feminine because a) it helps to connect to my core b) it helps me to be gentle with myself something that I lost in the process of being raised in a masculine environment.

You're probably not able to understand the depth of my problem, indirectly calling me a vampire was like the worst thing, I don't know why people bother to help others just to rub salt in the wounds but anyways thanks for the gesture. 

If you can't understand the feeling of "unloved" you won't understand my wound. Self love is one thing but craving companionship is also a need, maybe you don't have that need but that's fine. 

 

[Preety_India]

I don't know why I bother to open up to random people who never truly understand me and end up hurting me even more. 

 

[Preety_India]

Me talking to myself - 

Maybe over the rainbow there's a man who loves me truly and wholly. Who won't be afraid to love me. Who won't love me simply for feeling better off of my love but truly love me too, not simply desire me. I think what I'm looking for is deep intimacy with a man, not just sexual but also mental and emotional. Maybe this is what I was looking for all my life. I wanted it because I never got it making me crave it like crazy. I want him to talk to me, make me open up, admire me, like me, want me, love me, make me feel wanted, belonged, accepted, and be my true loyal companion through thick and thin, eternally bonded to my heart, authentic with his emotions, not faking it and the one who would never not want me. Who would offer me his love and support generously and never break my trust. Who would think I'm the apple of his eye. Who would love me spiritually and I would love him spiritually. I think spiritual love is difficult to be found.. 

 

[Preety_India]

Such a man can probably only exist in fantasy. Because in reality men lose interest. 

That's why I fantasize my ideal man so badly. 

Our bond will be so beautiful. 

Sadly I'm not even in that state in life where I can give a lot to a man. 

A lot of these scoundrels depleted my feminine energy. I was much more feminine a few years ago before Joseph came into my life and demanded every bit of my life and soul and literally left me drained and parched. I lost my health in serving his Lord Highness. 

A woman should never be with an abusive guy. It's a huge loss. You end up meeting a good man but you're already drained by that point. 

I wish I could go back to pre-Joseph era of my life. I was such a happy soul until that leech, that horrible leech came and took it away from my innocent soul. 

I was such a sweet doting adorable naive girl. 

He turned me into a grumpy wounded chick. 

So awful. I wish I had never met him. 

He used to use me like room service. 

He constantly wanted everything from me but always treating me badly in return. He would never let me be happy even for a second. Always put me down. 

He would not even say that he loves me. 

Everything he did was fake. He would never appreciate anything I did for him. Fucking narcissist. 

Being around him was like walking on eggshells. 

He was never grateful. I even saved his life once. Paid his bill. Got him to a safe place. 

He always used to want other women but not me. I was just a doormat for him.. 

And this man would tell me to never leave him, that he would go blind if I ever left him. 

And in the end he cheated on me. 

What a crock of shit!!!!!!! 

Asking me to stay loyal while cheating on me behind my back. 

Got rid of his abusive ass. 

 

Now back to my fantasy man. 

He would love me, care for me. We would love each other and be for each other. We would be faithful till the end. Come what may. 

I think what I'm looking for is just love. But I'm putting a personification to it. 

Maybe I'm looking for true love to heal the broken Cinderella in me. 

Damsel in distress. 

This makes me come to another conclusion. 

That I should simply focus on love rather than on the personification of that love. 

That love exists still as free floating energy waiting to be absorbed by me. 

That love is true love. What I have always been seeking and looking all my life. 

It's the food of the spirit. 

Maybe my spirit is too hungry for this love. And this state of hunger causes distress. 

Mother Theresa used to call this hunger, spiritual hunger. 

 

 

[Preety_India]

True love is eternal. I'm not talking about true love between two people but just standalone true love. 

The universe loves us. But we don't receive it because we block it so badly. 

True love exists all around us, not necessarily in people. 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

Victor Hugo has some beautiful quotes on love that I used to enjoy reading as a child. 

I remember these quotes from my childhood days. 

"Love is like a tree: it grows by itself, roots itself deeply in our being and continues to flourish over a heart in ruin." 

 

"Life is the flower for which love is the honey." 

 

"The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved; loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves." 

 

 

[Preety_India]

I want that Ethereal love. 

Just imagine what true love would look like. 

Absolute ecstacy. 

Let true love be your motivating nourishing force.. 

Right now through the corner of my eye I can see a lot of loving dead spirits walking around. They look like black gray  shadowy figures. 

I can feel their energy. 

You don't need a Personification of love. Love itself is a personification because love means God. 

God can move mountains. Hmm. Correct that. Love can move mountains. 

Even in seeking God, we are seeking love. 

The problem is that utter lack of love has made us almost disabled and blocked or in a state of agitation. 

 

My mother doesn't love me. My father is dead. It's hard to feel loved in such circumstances 

 

 

 

Edited March 17, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

True love is like rain. 

When it pours, it rains. 

It fills you up with abundance and energy and recharges you and takes the scarcity out of you. 

The word abundance is important. 

What you are truly lacking is abundance 

True love creates a state of abundance and then slowly heals and restores you from that place. 

It basically fills your cup.

How to access true love? 

Through visualization and attraction. 

Set your Heartspace in such a way that you are open to receiving love even in an unpersonified form.

Think from the perspective of true love. 

Think only two things. Only two things. 

One is being completely focused on the present moment and absolutely nothing else. 

Second is to imagine true love around you guiding you. What do you think it will say to you or what do you think it will guide you towards? There lies your answer. 

True love in the present moment is all you need to experience and to guide you through life 

We are constantly hunting for this love in pets, friends and lovers. 

The good news is that you don't need persons or animals to experience this love. Your mind itself has the ability to visualize this love through the power of your imagination and mental creativity. It's like mental art. 

 

 

Edited March 17, 2022 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

My journey to the greatest spiritual truth finally comes to an end. 

This is what I had been looking for for  more than 4 long years. 

Now it finally comes to me as a spiritual insight. 

I was looking for love, that elusive thing I was looking for was and is true love.. 

Eckhart Tolle is right about one part. You have to focus on the present moment. He forgot the other part - true love. 

True love is the healing energy you are looking for. 

It's here right here. 

When you allow true love into your life, that's when true healing begins in the actual full sense. 

 

 

[Preety_India]

When you focus on the present moment you are liberated..

It takes away unnecessary stress and confusion. The present moment allows you to feel grounded. After all it's only the present moment that we can have a certain degree of control over. 

And the next thing to do is to simply put all attention and focus on pure true love. 

Try this as a visualization meditation practice 

 

 

[Preety_India]

Let this pure true love guide you through everything. 

Think what true love would want for you. Do that. 

Imagine this love loving you. Receive it. 

Receive it like free food.. 

This true love is your guiding element. 

It is much easier to receive this through a person like an actual human or animal. 

Yet this is difficult because humans put such a high price tag on love.. 

They only give love on certain conditions. 

If those conditions aren't present, they don't love you. 

 

We love beautiful people. We love people who fulfill a certain role or agenda for us. 

We don't love someone for who they are. That's the rarest thing in the world. 

Such a love is only given by a mother to a child and this scenario is only possible if she is a good mother and not an abusive mother 

Thus this love is the rarest experience in this world. 

So fuck that.. 

You can still have love. By creating it yourself. 

Metaphorically it's like licking one's own wounds. 

[Preety_India]

It's sad that in this world only beautiful people are loved.. And only people who fulfill a future for you are deemed worthy of love. 

It's not hard to love someone. 

It's all about generosity. 

It's about the willingness and courage to love someone. Not holding back. Giving freely.. 

 

[Preety_India]

I don't even know where my life is leading me. 

A little bit of self expression helps.