Anhedonia

[Ryan_047]

Hello!

I am a 15 year old male teenager and I am living in a second world country.I have lost interest in everything and I feel like I have no feelings at all.Nothing has meaning to me and I can't find joy in absolutely nothing.And by nothing,I mean social interactions,hobbies,music,movies,games,school,reading and the list goes on and on.The things that I like(or at least,that I liked) now are so...empty,that's the best word that describes how I feel.Most of the time I feel neutral,or sad.Sometimes I feel like I can die just in the current moment,and I just wouldn't care,even though I haven't accomplished anything in my life.

 

I've done a little bit of research on the internet and I have something called "Anhedonia".In short,it is  the "inability to experience pleasure from activities usually found enjoyable",which is exactly how I feel.Be advised,I do not feel depressed(even though I think that anhedonia comes from depression).I was depressed for a period of time,but my depression is gone and now I feel like this.My goal was to become a web designer,make money,set an example for others,not to depend on my parents(from a financial point of view).And don't get me wrong,I really enjoyed coding but now..I enjoy nothing,and I have no desires.I would take the time to explain how I've got depressed,but according to the rules of this forum I should be as specific as possible.A last point:I can't go to a psychologist because my parents can't afford to pay one,and I don't really want them to find how I feel...

I watch Leo's videos for a long time and some ideas that he's telling in his videos,normally it would blow my mind and I would be excited and motivated,but..it felt so neutral like I was listening to a boring subject.Sometimes when I am thinking about this I feel so angry and sad...

I will turn 16 in a few days,and I feel sad because I know I should feel happy(by the way,I don't remember the last time I felt happy),but I just can't.I apologize if I wrote too much.

[Ayla]

Please see if you resonate with this video: 

 

Also, look into your diet. 

[Kelley White]

1 hour ago, Ryan_047 said:

Hello!

I am a 15 year old male teenager and I am living in a second world country.I have lost interest in everything and I feel like I have no feelings at all.Nothing has meaning to me and I can't find joy in absolutely nothing.And by nothing,I mean social interactions,hobbies,music,movies,games,school,reading and the list goes on and on.The things that I like(or at least,that I liked) now are so...empty,that's the best word that describes how I feel.Most of the time I feel neutral,or sad.Sometimes I feel like I can die just in the current moment,and I just wouldn't care,even though I haven't accomplished anything in my life.

 

I've done a little bit of research on the internet and I have something called "Anhedonia".In short,it is  the "inability to experience pleasure from activities usually found enjoyable",which is exactly how I feel.Be advised,I do not feel depressed(even though I think that anhedonia comes from depression).I was depressed for a period of time,but my depression is gone and now I feel like this.My goal was to become a web designer,make money,set an example for others,not to depend on my parents(from a financial point of view).And don't get me wrong,I really enjoyed coding but now..I enjoy nothing,and I have no desires.I would take the time to explain how I've got depressed,but according to the rules of this forum I should be as specific as possible.A last point:I can't go to a psychologist because my parents can't afford to pay one,and I don't really want them to find how I feel...

I watch Leo's videos for a long time and some ideas that he's telling in his videos,normally it would blow my mind and I would be excited and motivated,but..it felt so neutral like I was listening to a boring subject.Sometimes when I am thinking about this I feel so angry and sad...

I will turn 16 in a few days,and I feel sad because I know I should feel happy(by the way,I don't remember the last time I felt happy),but I just can't.I apologize if I wrote too much.

Hi @Ryan_047, its nice to meet you.

I open with thank you for your long message.  I like long messages.  Thank you for so clearly expressing how you are feeling.

For anyone else who might read this thread lets let them know what we are talking about when we say  "Anhedonia".
 

Quote

 

Anhedonia (/ˌænhiˈdoʊniə/ AN-hee-DOH-nee-ə; Greek: ἀν- an-, "without" and ἡδονή hēdonē, "pleasure") is the inability to experience pleasure from activities usually found enjoyable, e.g. exercise, hobbies, music, sexual activities or social interactions. While earlier definitions of anhedonia emphasized pleasurable experience, more recent models have highlighted the need to consider different aspects of enjoyable behavior, such as motivation or desire to engage in activities (motivational anhedonia), as compared to the level of enjoyment of the activity itself ("consummatory anhedonia").[1]

According to William James the term was coined by Théodule-Armand Ribot.

One can distinguish many kinds of pathological depression. Sometimes it is mere passive joylessness and dreariness, discouragement, dejection, lack of taste and zest and spring. Professor Ribot proposed the name anhedonia to designate this condition. "The state of anhedonia, if I may coin a new word to pair off with analgesia," he writes, "has been very little studied, but it exists."[2]

Anhedonia can be a characteristic of mental disorders including mood disorders, schizoaffective disorder, borderline personality disorder, schizoid personality disorder and schizophrenia. For example, the 7th DSM-IV criterion for Borderline Personality Disorder: "chronic feelings of emptiness." Results indicate that emptiness is negligibly related to boredom, is closely related to feeling hopeless, pathologically lonely, and isolated, and is a robust predictor of depression and suicidal ideation (but not anxiety or suicide attempts). Findings are consistent with DSM-IV revisions regarding the 7th criterion for Borderline Personality Disorder. In addition, findings suggest the emptiness reflects pathologically low positive affect and significant psychiatric distress.[3] People affected with schizophrenia often describe themselves as feeling emotionally empty.[4]

Mood disturbances are commonly observed in many psychiatric disorders. Disturbing mood changes may occur resultant to stressful life events and they are not uncommon during times of physical illness.[5] While anhedonia can be a feature of such mood changes, they are not mutually inclusive.

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anhedonia

I can really appreciate what you are talking about here.   You don't feel depressed like you used to, but on some level you can't focus so well, nothing seems fun?  Am I hearing you correctly here? 

I am sorry you don't feel you can talk to your parents, i think many teens feel that way all around the world. 

Is it true your parents really won't understand or be able to help?  Is this your fear?  (I don't know....I'm asking.  You can  just know the answer, you don't have to share it with me if you don't want to.)

I'm sorry about the lack of mental health resources.  I've been there as well.  It can feel bad. ..kind of hopeless.

What's awesome is you are here!  You are still saying, "I can get tools and do this." 

Sounds to me like you are a fighter!  I like fighters!  Fighters can do anything when you give them the right tools!  Fighters change the world. 

Its okay to have a day you can't enjoy things too.  When I get there rather than saying why can't I enjoy x ?  Now I do x and just let the feelings come and go.  I don't judge them, I just go with it.  Sometimes I give into them and feel them.  I just sit with them even though its not so fun.

Sometime I forget and catch myself having....fun.    Funny how that works!

The other thing I do when I can't find anything else fun to do or focus?  I help other people.  Maybe there is a friend who is experiencing the same thing you are and you both can help each other? 

When you listen to Leo's videos and get bored?  Take a break.  Get up, walk around, then sit back down and keep going?  You're 15.  15 Year olds have a 15 minute attention span did you know that?  When you're 16 it will be about 16 minutes unless you really want something really badly.   That's normal.   Its how teenage brains work.   They are still growing. 

When something makes you feel and makes you angry or sad?  I would pay attention to that thing and ask what about Leo's topic made you feel when you can't seem to feel any other time? 

Should you feel happy right now?  I don't know.  I don't know what you're living through right now.  Maybe you shouldn't be happy?  Maybe you should be feeling angry and sad and be questioning?  You are.  You must need to.  What do you think about some of these things?  Its okay to take your time, its okay to not answer back for awhile and think about it too. 

Is there another adult you can talk too?  Are there resources for mental health you might not be aware of that another adult could help you find? 

Great question, you are braver and stronger than I suspect you think.

 

 

 

 

[Ryan_047]

34 minutes ago, Kelley White said:

Hi @Ryan_047, its nice to meet you.

I open with thank you for your long message.  I like long messages.  Thank you for so clearly expressing how you are feeling.

For anyone else who might read this thread lets let them know what we are talking about when we say  "Anhedonia".
 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anhedonia

I can really appreciate what you are talking about here.   You don't feel depressed like you used to, but on some level you can't focus so well, nothing seems fun?  Am I hearing you correctly here? 

I am sorry you don't feel you can talk to your parents, i think many teens feel that way all around the world. 

Is it true your parents really won't understand or be able to help?  Is this your fear?  (I don't know....I'm asking.  You can  just know the answer, you don't have to share it with me if you don't want to.)

I'm sorry about the lack of mental health resources.  I've been there as well.  It can feel bad. ..kind of hopeless.

What's awesome is you are here!  You are still saying, "I can get tools and do this." 

Sounds to me like you are a fighter!  I like fighters!  Fighters can do anything when you give them the right tools!  Fighters change the world. 

Its okay to have a day you can't enjoy things too.  When I get there rather than saying why can't I enjoy x ?  Now I do x and just let the feelings come and go.  I don't judge them, I just go with it.  Sometimes I give into them and feel them.  I just sit with them even though its not so fun.

Sometime I forget and catch myself having....fun.    Funny how that works!

The other thing I do when I can't find anything else fun to do or focus?  I help other people.  Maybe there is a friend who is experiencing the same thing you are and you both can help each other? 

When you listen to Leo's videos and get bored?  Take a break.  Get up, walk around, then sit back down and keep going?  You're 15.  15 Year olds have a 15 minute attention span did you know that?  When you're 16 it will be about 16 minutes unless you really want something really badly.   That's normal.   Its how teenage brains work.   They are still growing. 

When something makes you feel and makes you angry or sad?  I would pay attention to that thing and ask what about Leo's topic made you feel when you can't seem to feel any other time? 

Should you feel happy right now?  I don't know.  I don't know what you're living through right now.  Maybe you shouldn't be happy?  Maybe you should be feeling angry and sad and be questioning?  You are.  You must need to.  What do you think about some of these things?  Its okay to take your time, its okay to not answer back for awhile and think about it too. 

Is there another adult you can talk too?  Are there resources for mental health you might not be aware of that another adult could help you find? 

Great question, you are braver and stronger than I suspect you think.

 

 

 

 

Thanks for the answer,I also like long subjects.

Well,I don't want to appeal to my parents.My father had a disease recently(I don't really want to describe it) and this affected me and my family much.We spent and we are still spending money on his health.This was a factor that has contributed to my depression.The other factor were the exams I needed to pass in the 8th grade.These 2 factors created a lot of stress for me.Also,I don't think that my parents would understand,in the best scenario they would buy me anti-depress medication,which is one of the last things I want.I think that meditating would help me,but if my parents would see me meditating they would thing I've gone crazy...And I don't have a lot of time by my own.

Unfortunately,I can't appeal to anybody but to the internet.This is the only resource I have got right now.And yes,I can't really focus well and nothing seems fun to me.This "mood" is driving me nuts...I realize that I should do something and not waste my time but this anhedonia is stopping me.I can't feel motivated,happy,optimistic in order to be productive.I also lost my sense of humor(I realized this when I watched Leo's video,on how to develop a sense of humor.I was doing some of the stuff he was talking about in the past in a natural way,but now...).Honestly I feel so frustrated sometimes that literally I want to scream and I become violent(I am a really calm person and violence is a rare thing for me).

But enough with complaining...I appreciate the help you are giving me.But,can you please tell me what should I do in a more specific way?Don't get me wrong,I am not expecting a super-professional answer,or a magic pill but something to pull me in the right direction...An exercise,a mindset,an affirmation that I should do on a day-basis,anything..I am starting to become desperate.Thank you again.

[Kelley White]

28 minutes ago, Ryan_047 said:

Well,I don't want to appeal to my parents.My father had a disease recently(I don't really want to describe it) and this affected me and my family much.We spent and we are still spending money on his health.This was a factor that has contributed to my depression.The other factor were the exams I needed to pass in the 8th grade.These 2 factors created a lot of stress for me.Also,I don't think that my parents would understand,in the best scenario they would buy me anti-depress medication,which is one of the last things I want.

Hi @Ryan_047 so it sounds to me like you have some reasons to feel the way you do.

1. Dad's sick
2. Money awareness
3. Exams

Probably Mom is stressed as well?

You are 15.  That's what moms and dads do.  They care about their 15 year old.  Adults also get busy and caught up in adult stuff.  Medicine for the short term might be very helpful.  It might be something you need.  That is a decision your parents should make and you might want to rethink talking to them so they can help you.  I bet they would like to help you if they knew.  I don't know, I might be wrong, I don't know them.   Maybe going to the doctor and letting the doctor decide is good?

34 minutes ago, Ryan_047 said:

I think that meditating would help me,but if my parents would see me meditating they would thing I've gone crazy...And I don't have a lot of time by my own.

Why would your parents think you were going crazy if they caught you meditating?  What do you do when you are mediating?  You known some folks think you have to do lots of special things to meditate.  That's not been my experience.  You have a computer...do you have headphones?  Youtube meditation music and you look like any other teenager with headphones plugged in listening to your music.

 

37 minutes ago, Ryan_047 said:

Unfortunately,I can't appeal to anybody but to the internet.This is the only resource I have got right now.And yes,I can't really focus well and nothing seems fun to me.This "mood" is driving me nuts...I realize that I should do something and not waste my time but this anhedonia is stopping me.I can't feel motivated,happy,optimistic in order to be productive.I also lost my sense of humor(I realized this when I watched Leo's video,on how to develop a sense of humor.I was doing some of the stuff he was talking about in the past in a natural way,but now...).Honestly I feel so frustrated sometimes that literally I want to scream and I become violent(I am a really calm person and violence is a rare thing for me).

The internet can be a great support system.  Someone is there 24/7.  Technology rocks!   Secret?  I'm right there with you?  The fun thing?  Its work at first.  Now I could lie to you and say oh, this learning to have fun thing is going to be all fun?  Its not.  Sometimes you have to start by doing something uncomfortable.   

Frustrated.  Frustrated is good.  You identified the emotion.  You are frustrated with feeling the way you feel.  Good!    Want to scream?  Scream into your pillow in your bedroom if you can.  Go into the woods or somewhere where you can scream and scream.

Violent?  Injustice and rage can get you there rarely, its what you do with it.  I used to buy my kids used or broken dishes from thrifts stores and let them throw them or wear goggles and smash them with a hammer.  (You have to clean up after yourself though. LOL )  Punch your bed.  Get the energy out in a way you get to feel better but you don't hurt your self or someone else.

44 minutes ago, Ryan_047 said:

But,can you please tell me what should I do in a more specific way?Don't get me wrong,I am not expecting a super-professional answer,or a magic pill but something to pull me in the right direction...An exercise,a mindset,an affirmation that I should do on a day-basis,anything..I am starting to become desperate.Thank you again.

Take one thing you don't feel like doing and make yourself do it.  Don't judge the feelings that arise, just commit to do it.   If you start and you don't get all the way through or have fun, give yourself permission to say "that's okay" and give yourself credit for doing it anyway.  That's huge.  Its more than many will do in a lifetime.

Other than that?  How about this?  I am going to post this link to Leo's Mediation Tips and Techniques?  You listen to it.  I will leave the forum and I will listen to it and do it with you even though I can't be there with you.  Then when you feel this way, you can come back here and listen to Leo's mediation video and meditate.   Sound like one good first step you can take with me? 

[Kelley White]

Leo's Mediation Link http://www.actualized.org/articles/mindfulness-meditation

[Ryan_047]

6 minutes ago, Kelley White said:

Leo's Mediation Link http://www.actualized.org/articles/mindfulness-meditation

Ok,this should be a step forward.I will do as you say.I have to go to bed now,it is late in my country and I am sleepy.

Well,I listened to Leo's first meditating video and he said that I should stand with my back still and keep my eyes closed and start meditating.I think I would seem weird if somebody sees me.But,your tip sounds good.

Yes,my mother is very stressed because of work,money and sometimes because of my father.She has a lot to deal with,I don't really want to be her next thing to worry about.

My grandfather died because of medication.It destroyed him,and he had cancer too.Now my father takes a lot of medication every day.I am trying to avoid them as much as possible,but I take them if I strongly need.I will do the steps you told me,and reply to you back tomorrow.I really appreciate.Honestly,if would know you,I would hug you.

[Kelley White]

@Ryan_047  Sleep is good.  If you get 8 hours your brain rewires itself.  If you don't sleep so well it can't do its job.  Sleep is good.

Moms usually worry more if they don't know.  Medicine for bad illness is different then medicine for awhile to help your brain chemistry.  So maybe think about that and see if you feel differently tomorrow?

I am sorry to hear about your grandfather, when we use medicine the wrong way?  Yeah it can hurt us.   I regret that you experienced that.

Good for you.  I'm going to start Leo's video over, so I don't cheat, and virtual hugs are always good.  Hugs back and thank you.  You get some rest.

[ModernSage]

2 hours ago, Ryan_047 said:

I think that meditating would help me,but if my parents would see me meditating they would thing I've gone crazy...And I don't have a lot of time by my own.

Dear @Ryan_047

You can meditate without anyone knowing you are doing it.

You don't have to be seated in a stereotypical cross-legged position.

# You may be seated in your desk chair, on a sofa, in the loo, taking a shower, laying in bed. It's not the posture that matters but your inner dialogue and intentions.

Here are some things you can try:

1. Listen to ambiance sounds so that your mind can focus on a neutral acoustic environment. This way even if you don't have enough privacy you can at least feel by yourself because you are isolating other people's sounds.

I personally love the sound of the rain and it definitely makes me feel good.

http://www.rainymood.com/

2. audiobooks really really help, try listening to the Alchemist. You can find a lot of them on youtube or on audible. There is a lot of read poetry that i love. 

3. breathing.

Watch this video, it's a very simple but powerful technique.

 

 

4. positive quotes on your walls.

Basically positively brainwash your brain by putting sayings on the walls that you will see randomly each time you walk past them.

For example, you can write with a marker, sharpie, pen, whatever you want to use on a A4 peace of paper, something like "Dream it, Believe it, Achieve it" or, "may I be joyful".

You put it on the back of your door in your room. Every time you close the door your eyes will catch it and read it. Little by little becomes a lot and by enough exposure to positive messages it will become internalized.

5. go to goodreads and look for quotes

from people like Buddha, Alan Watts, Einstein, Carl Sagan, any wise human really, and save the ones you like by "liking them" with the thumbs up button.

Then choose the ones that resonate the most with you.

Write 1 quote on 1 paper and then glutack it on your wall. Repeat with any other surface that you are constantly looking at like : the area of your ceiling under your bed, or the light switch for your room. Trust me, you will read it in times that you don't expect and it will make you feel better and even slowly change your perspective on things.

 

Basically the idea is : Surround yourself with positivity.

6. Go to zenpencils and spent time there. Read whatever you fancy. I would start with this: http://zenpencils.com/comic/94-the-two-wolves/

7. Watch your inner dialogue.

Be present with the feeling of "no pleasure" or with the feeling of sadness.

Become friends with it.

Observe it. Don't become part of it.

Great book that is guaranteed to help you is : The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle.

http://www.amazon.com/The-Power-Now-Spiritual-Enlightenment/dp/1577314808

8. mindfulness books are your friends. Start with these two.

Peace is every step

&

Peace is Every Breath

by Thich Nhat Hanh

9. Loving kindness meditation.

Be kind to yourself.

Repeat in your mind : "May i be peaceful, may i be happy, may i be free from suffering, may i be joyous, may i be safe, "

http://www.mindful.org/18-science-based-reasons-to-try-loving-kindness-meditation/
 

10. Putting things in perspective:

Carl Sagan is simply the best person that can really help anyone see things from a grander perspective.

Watch this:

 

 

11. Running,

If you start running, it won't just add serotonin and endorphin to your blood, but it will take you out of the house and make you feel good. It's a really nice form of escaping your environment, and a great way to have "me time". You can spent time away from your parents and chores for 30' every day and see places around where you live in a different way! Even better if there is like a small forest of some greenery that you go and replenish your energies.

12. Guided Meditations.

Breathe is a great app if you have an iPhone/iPad. Guided Meditations are an easy way to start meditating from where you are right now without the need for going to classes etc.

5 min meditations are really helpful and you can definitely squeeze them in your day.

 

Always Remember:

"You are a child of the Universe"

"You as anybody else in the world deserve your love and attention" - Buddha.

 

If you try some of these tips I am positive that you will be in a better place than where you started.

 

And last but not least, remember, there people out there that are having much much worse experiences than you do. Feel gratitude for what you have. 

13. Maybe even start a gratitude Journal.

http://www.wikihow.com/Start-a-Gratitude-Journal

14. Realising how much time you have in the world:

 

 

 

 

So : What are you going to try today?

 

Edited February 11, 2016 by ModernSage
wanted to add a few things.

[Ryan_047]

17 hours ago, ModernSage said:

Dear @Ryan_047

You can meditate without anyone knowing you are doing it.

You don't have to be seated in a stereotypical cross-legged position.

# You may be seated in your desk chair, on a sofa, in the loo, taking a shower, laying in bed. It's not the posture that matters but your inner dialogue and intentions.

Here are some things you can try:

1. Listen to ambiance sounds so that your mind can focus on a neutral acoustic environment. This way even if you don't have enough privacy you can at least feel by yourself because you are isolating other people's sounds.

I personally love the sound of the rain and it definitely makes me feel good.

http://www.rainymood.com/

2. audiobooks really really help, try listening to the Alchemist. You can find a lot of them on youtube or on audible. There is a lot of read poetry that i love. 

3. breathing.

Watch this video, it's a very simple but powerful technique.

 

 

4. positive quotes on your walls.

Basically positively brainwash your brain by putting sayings on the walls that you will see randomly each time you walk past them.

For example, you can write with a marker, sharpie, pen, whatever you want to use on a A4 peace of paper, something like "Dream it, Believe it, Achieve it" or, "may I be joyful".

You put it on the back of your door in your room. Every time you close the door your eyes will catch it and read it. Little by little becomes a lot and by enough exposure to positive messages it will become internalized.

5. go to goodreads and look for quotes

from people like Buddha, Alan Watts, Einstein, Carl Sagan, any wise human really, and save the ones you like by "liking them" with the thumbs up button.

Then choose the ones that resonate the most with you.

Write 1 quote on 1 paper and then glutack it on your wall. Repeat with any other surface that you are constantly looking at like : the area of your ceiling under your bed, or the light switch for your room. Trust me, you will read it in times that you don't expect and it will make you feel better and even slowly change your perspective on things.

 

Basically the idea is : Surround yourself with positivity.

6. Go to zenpencils and spent time there. Read whatever you fancy. I would start with this: http://zenpencils.com/comic/94-the-two-wolves/

7. Watch your inner dialogue.

Be present with the feeling of "no pleasure" or with the feeling of sadness.

Become friends with it.

Observe it. Don't become part of it.

Great book that is guaranteed to help you is : The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle.

http://www.amazon.com/The-Power-Now-Spiritual-Enlightenment/dp/1577314808

8. mindfulness books are your friends. Start with these two.

Peace is every step

&

Peace is Every Breath

by Thich Nhat Hanh

9. Loving kindness meditation.

Be kind to yourself.

Repeat in your mind : "May i be peaceful, may i be happy, may i be free from suffering, may i be joyous, may i be safe, "

http://www.mindful.org/18-science-based-reasons-to-try-loving-kindness-meditation/
 

10. Putting things in perspective:

Carl Sagan is simply the best person that can really help anyone see things from a grander perspective.

Watch this:

 

 

11. Running,

If you start running, it won't just add serotonin and endorphin to your blood, but it will take you out of the house and make you feel good. It's a really nice form of escaping your environment, and a great way to have "me time". You can spent time away from your parents and chores for 30' every day and see places around where you live in a different way! Even better if there is like a small forest of some greenery that you go and replenish your energies.

12. Guided Meditations.

Breathe is a great app if you have an iPhone/iPad. Guided Meditations are an easy way to start meditating from where you are right now without the need for going to classes etc.

5 min meditations are really helpful and you can definitely squeeze them in your day.

 

Always Remember:

"You are a child of the Universe"

"You as anybody else in the world deserve your love and attention" - Buddha.

 

If you try some of these tips I am positive that you will be in a better place than where you started.

 

And last but not least, remember, there people out there that are having much much worse experiences than you do. Feel gratitude for what you have. 

13. Maybe even start a gratitude Journal.

http://www.wikihow.com/Start-a-Gratitude-Journal

14. Realising how much time you have in the world:

 

 

 

 

So : What are you going to try today?

 

Thank you for the long answer.I will try meditating as you suggested.

[Kelley White]

17 hours ago, ModernSage said:

Dear @Ryan_047

You can meditate without anyone knowing you are doing it.

You don't have to be seated in a stereotypical cross-legged position.

# You may be seated in your desk chair, on a sofa, in the loo, taking a shower, laying in bed. It's not the posture that matters but your inner dialogue and intentions.

Here are some things you can try:

1. Listen to ambiance sounds so that your mind can focus on a neutral acoustic environment. This way even if you don't have enough privacy you can at least feel by yourself because you are isolating other people's sounds.

I personally love the sound of the rain and it definitely makes me feel good.

http://www.rainymood.com/

2. audiobooks really really help, try listening to the Alchemist. You can find a lot of them on youtube or on audible. There is a lot of read poetry that i love. 

3. breathing.

Watch this video, it's a very simple but powerful technique.

 

 

4. positive quotes on your walls.

Basically positively brainwash your brain by putting sayings on the walls that you will see randomly each time you walk past them.

For example, you can write with a marker, sharpie, pen, whatever you want to use on a A4 peace of paper, something like "Dream it, Believe it, Achieve it" or, "may I be joyful".

You put it on the back of your door in your room. Every time you close the door your eyes will catch it and read it. Little by little becomes a lot and by enough exposure to positive messages it will become internalized.

5. go to goodreads and look for quotes

from people like Buddha, Alan Watts, Einstein, Carl Sagan, any wise human really, and save the ones you like by "liking them" with the thumbs up button.

Then choose the ones that resonate the most with you.

Write 1 quote on 1 paper and then glutack it on your wall. Repeat with any other surface that you are constantly looking at like : the area of your ceiling under your bed, or the light switch for your room. Trust me, you will read it in times that you don't expect and it will make you feel better and even slowly change your perspective on things.

 

Basically the idea is : Surround yourself with positivity.

6. Go to zenpencils and spent time there. Read whatever you fancy. I would start with this: http://zenpencils.com/comic/94-the-two-wolves/

7. Watch your inner dialogue.

Be present with the feeling of "no pleasure" or with the feeling of sadness.

Become friends with it.

Observe it. Don't become part of it.

Great book that is guaranteed to help you is : The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle.

http://www.amazon.com/The-Power-Now-Spiritual-Enlightenment/dp/1577314808

8. mindfulness books are your friends. Start with these two.

Peace is every step

&

Peace is Every Breath

by Thich Nhat Hanh

9. Loving kindness meditation.

Be kind to yourself.

Repeat in your mind : "May i be peaceful, may i be happy, may i be free from suffering, may i be joyous, may i be safe, "

http://www.mindful.org/18-science-based-reasons-to-try-loving-kindness-meditation/
 

10. Putting things in perspective:

Carl Sagan is simply the best person that can really help anyone see things from a grander perspective.

Watch this:

 

 

11. Running,

If you start running, it won't just add serotonin and endorphin to your blood, but it will take you out of the house and make you feel good. It's a really nice form of escaping your environment, and a great way to have "me time". You can spent time away from your parents and chores for 30' every day and see places around where you live in a different way! Even better if there is like a small forest of some greenery that you go and replenish your energies.

12. Guided Meditations.

Breathe is a great app if you have an iPhone/iPad. Guided Meditations are an easy way to start meditating from where you are right now without the need for going to classes etc.

5 min meditations are really helpful and you can definitely squeeze them in your day.

 

Always Remember:

"You are a child of the Universe"

"You as anybody else in the world deserve your love and attention" - Buddha.

 

If you try some of these tips I am positive that you will be in a better place than where you started.

 

And last but not least, remember, there people out there that are having much much worse experiences than you do. Feel gratitude for what you have. 

13. Maybe even start a gratitude Journal.

http://www.wikihow.com/Start-a-Gratitude-Journal

14. Realising how much time you have in the world:

 

 

 

 

So : What are you going to try today?

@ModernSage I've not looked at all of you links yet, but you have used many videos which are favorites of mine as well.  Thank you for this really awesome share.  Its funny last night I was thinking about sharing the Sagan Video with Ryan as well.  

@Ryan_047 I hope you are having a better day today. 

I started the day with Leo's Deeper Mediation video.  So I was thinking...what is one thing you used to think was fun or you were passionate about doing which you could do today even though you might not feel like it?

[Ryan_047]

2 minutes ago, Kelley White said:

@ModernSage I've not looked at all of you links yet, but you have used many videos which are favorites of mine as well.  Thank you for this really awesome share.  Its funny last night I was thinking about sharing the Sagan Video with Ryan as well.  

@Ryan_047 I hope you are having a better day today. 

I started the day with Leo's Deeper Mediation video.  So I was thinking...what is one thing you used to think was fun or you were passionate about doing which you could do today even though you might not feel like it?

Well,I liked coding,reading,playing video games,or study psyhchology and body leanguage.I am forcing myself to code every night but I can't focus more than 30 minutes and if I take a pause I become very lazy and don't want to continue anymore.Even so,sometimes I feel a little bit of pleasure..but very very little pleasure and it lasts for a few seconds.Today I spent some time outside,and I felt like nothing changed.

[Kelley White]

OKAY @Ryan_047

9 minutes ago, Ryan_047 said:

17 minutes ago, Kelley White said:

@ModernSage I've not looked at all of you links yet, but you have used many videos which are favorites of mine as well.  Thank you for this really awesome share.  Its funny last night I was thinking about sharing the Sagan Video with Ryan as well.  

@Ryan_047 I hope you are having a better day today. 

I started the day with Leo's Deeper Mediation video.  So I was thinking...what is one thing you used to think was fun or you were passionate about doing which you could do today even though you might not feel like it?

Well,I liked coding,reading,playing video games,or study psyhchology and body leanguage.I am forcing myself to code every night but I can't focus more than 30 minutes and if I take a pause I become very lazy and don't want to continue anymore.Even so,sometimes I feel a little bit of pleasure..but very very little pleasure and it lasts for a few seconds.Today I spent some time outside,and I felt like nothing changed.

Great!  I hear you like:

Coding

Reading

Video games

Study either psychology or body language.

You're forcing your self to code 30 minutes and getting  very very little pleasure.  Which means you are getting a mustard seed of pleasure right?  An itsy bisty one.

Now you're 15 so you have a 15 minute attention span.  You are pushing your self 15 minutes beyond your attention span!  Awesome for you! 

You might be being harsh calling yourself lazy when you are 15 and forcing yourself to go 15 minutes beyond what is average for your age?  You might be above average if you are going above and beyond?  What do you think about my observation? 

Do you want to reward yourself with 15 minutes of gaming, reading or study?  You pick, I'll commit to do the same activity for fifteen minutes and we can check back tomorrow and see how it went.  What do you think about that?  You want to try it? 

 

[Ryan_047]

Well I would pick reading.But,I am not really sure how this can help me,we both doing the same action for 15 minutes in the same day.

[Kelley White]

@Ryan_047, Awesome!  I like reading and I have a book I am reading for Leo's course.  Thank you.  You would be helping me.  (Remember, I am right where you are, and I'm an adult.   I don't think much is fun and I have a challenging time focusing as well. 

My thought was if we help each other? 

If we are accountable to each other  "hey yeah, I'll try this thing? " we are both more likely to do it?  What do you think?  Helpful?  Not helpful for you? 

I find sometimes its just nice to know someone is willing to do something with you as support.  Encouragement.  I don't know if that is helpful for you or not?

[Ryan_047]

@Kelley White

3 minutes ago, Kelley White said:

@Ryan_047, Awesome!  I like reading and I have a book I am reading for Leo's course.  Thank you.  You would be helping me.  (Remember, I am right where you are, and I'm an adult.   I don't think much is fun and I have a challenging time focusing as well. 

My thought was if we help each other? 

If we are accountable to each other  "hey yeah, I'll try this thing? " we are both more likely to do it?  What do you think?  Helpful?  Not helpful for you? 

I find sometimes its just nice to know someone is willing to do something with you as support.  Encouragement.  I don't know if that is helpful for you or not?

I spent a few time thinking about this and yes,this would help.I think you are right.I loved helping people as well...It felt good in the past.So,we start reading now for 15 minutes?

[Kelley White]

11 minutes ago, Ryan_047 said:

I spent a few time thinking about this and yes,this would help.I think you are right.I loved helping people as well...It felt good in the past.So,we start reading now for 15 minutes?

@Ryan_047 Thank you.  I'm glad you thought about it.  I would not want you to do it unless it would be helpful to  you.  Now  its a win/win for both of us.  So today I will read at least fifteen minutes the book for Leo's class.  If you want to do it now?  Go ahead and do it now.  I have a certain amount of time I spend in the forum and then I have an appointment.   So I can do my reading this afternoon.  I say just set the best fifteen minutes aside to read that works for you.

[Ryan_047]

4 minutes ago, Kelley White said:

Thank you.  I'm glad you thought about it.  I would not want you to do it unless it would be helpful to  you.  Now  its a win/win for both of us.  So today I will read at least fifteen minutes the book for Leo's class.  If you want to do it now?  Go ahead and do it now.  I have a certain amount of time I spend in the forum and then I have an appointment.   So I can do my reading this afternoon.  I say just set the best fifteen minutes aside to read that works for you.

I will start reading now and tomorrow I will let you know how it was.Not it is almost 9 PM in my country.

[Kelley White]

@Ryan_047 Wonderful.  Its late morning here.  So yes, I will meet you here tomorrow and you can tell me how it went.  Try to get a good night's rest as well.   I hope you are reading something fun/interesting?

[ModernSage]

Action expresses priorities

- Mohandas Gandhi.

Make your own happiness a priority today.

---

 

Also i thought that since your attention span is low you can use the pomodoro technique which really helps.

 

 

Also watch these videos here on Motivation. Kudos to the amazing guys of Asapscience on youtube.