Cathal

When anger arises

5 posts in this topic

i'm dealing with a lot of suppressed emotions from my past - especially anger. when it arises, do i physically do something like smash my pillow to death or something or do i just let the anger flow all of my body and stick with it till it's gone?

 


just be here, if you can do it this moment you can do it the next moment

this is the now, now is all that is real, the truth is now, not your concept or experience, just this

is there suffering in this ? work to be done young jedi. me

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2 hours ago, catcat69123 said:

i'm dealing with a lot of suppressed emotions from my past - especially anger.

That's the first step, great. Acknowledging it's existence, rather than denying and suppressing. Subconsciously it may feel like you're in the "drivers seat" when it's being suppressed, but really it's just avoidance, and you lose control of that "drivers seat" when it comes up in other ways you might not notice or can control.

2 hours ago, catcat69123 said:

when it arises, do i physically do something like smash my pillow to death or something

No, that is not a healthy way to deal with it. Destruction is a sneaky way of feeding it's power and thinking it's valid.

Although something like a punching bag or exercise generally is a good way to healthily expel the energy. Try it if you haven't.

2 hours ago, catcat69123 said:

do i just let the anger flow all of my body and stick with it till it's gone?

As you aren't in a position to exercise all the time, it's a good idea to work on it mentally and spiritually.

You're right about letting it flow! Use meditation and breathing exercises to put yourself in an "observer" state. You want to let the anger exist, let it flow (not in the way The Emperor wants :D), and simply notice it go by.

Ask questions like:

- Why am I angry?

- What is the source? Is that source valid? Am I overreacting?

- Is this anger true?

- Is it helpful?

- What would happen if I let go?

As you practice this and get better at being in "observer" mode you'll notice the feeling of anger will dissolve faster and faster. The anger exists and it can be real, but it's usually hollow, and it's US that is making it seem "full" and giving it power.

Hope this helps. 


hrhrhtewgfegege

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@Roy thanks this is really helpful, it reminds me of that letting go book by david r. hawkins, it is really difficult not to punch something or rip something apart though jesus, i have a ton of suppressed anger from being raised the way i was so i don't know how to deal with it. not in the way The Emperor wants xD 


just be here, if you can do it this moment you can do it the next moment

this is the now, now is all that is real, the truth is now, not your concept or experience, just this

is there suffering in this ? work to be done young jedi. me

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The same issue is what I am facing now .Plus I am addicted to antidepressants ,without them nothing feels good . What to do ?

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9 hours ago, catcat69123 said:

@Roy thanks this is really helpful, it reminds me of that letting go book by david r. hawkins, it is really difficult not to punch something or rip something apart though jesus, i have a ton of suppressed anger from being raised the way i was so i don't know how to deal with it. not in the way The Emperor wants xD 

I can relate all too well, unfortunately! I think it's important to be patient with yourself, because all that anger that's been built up isn't going to dissipate overnight, our bodies hold on to so much and it can take a lot of time and effort to release these feelings from our dense physical forms. I've found in my own experience that consciously inhabiting the body and simply allowing the body to relax and breathe has been key to releasing these feelings - that's been the value of practices like breath meditation and yoga for me, because they bring attention into the body. That's not to say that it's all sunshine and rainbows, though, because there can be a lot of agitation and discomfort in the body, so there does need to be a willingness to allow the arising of feelings and sensations that feel uncomfortable or even painful, and to breathe through such feelings.


'When you look outside yourself for something to make you feel complete, you never get to know the fullness of your essential nature.' - Amoda Maa Jeevan

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