StarStruck

Day game: minimizing flakes

46 posts in this topic

On 4/30/2021 at 7:55 PM, StarStruck said:

So I had some time to integrate the lessons and I did some approaches today:

TaySocial's lessons about carrying your manhood really helped me. I managed to have some nice conversations with some girls and pickup a really nice blonde and get her on an instant date.

For me these are the lessons: get out of your head, be an idiot, be dumb, be a fool, be a dick and be fun but don't lose your masculine frame at any cost. Seems like women accept everything as long as you don't lose your masculine frame, even if you are an idiot or a fool. I still have to test these hypotheses for myself.

If I look back to my dating career, it makes sense. This is what I was blind to. It is not important how and why this lack of manhood has manifested in my life, I solved it now.

Hey, mentioning the manhood stuff, I have a question.

My previous relationship made me "pretend" to be shy a lot, not only as a habit, but more as kind of a character trait even.

eg. Yesterday I was talking to some girl I just met and everything's going great and at one point in the convo I was implying some future interaction and she responded to that with "Oh, so you would like to (this part is hard to translate, but the most important part of the meaning is the seeing each other often part) associate with me?" which, given the whole context, makes it kind of an intimate question, she didn't even phrase it in a shit test kind of way, she was just genuinely curious imo.

My reply to that was me looking away in a playful manner, pretending to be shy and struck denying my intentions, in a very feminine kind of way.

Would that be considered a break of my masculine frame? Because I didn't break the act and just say "Yes." afterward, which I reckon would balance it out perfectly, or even any of the usual responses to a shit-test. I'm just kind of more like this because my ex acted like this a lot and I picked it up completely from her.

I just wonder whether it's off-putting in retrospect. Does it devalue you, or make you out to be perceived as more childish, etc.

I have plenty of masculinity to back it up though, but I also gravitate towards the androgyne playfulness.

Edited by Kshantivadin

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@Kshantivadin yes, that is breaking masculine frame.

Don't micromanage, rather look at the greater trend whether you are carry masculinity or not.

Communication happens on three levels: verbal, non-verbal and intention. You have to have clear intentions and preferably masculine intentions in a intimate relationship. When you are out and about with your intentions (verbally or nonverbally) she will be affected by that and be feminine in your presence.

Did you sleep with her? After you slept with her you can show more feminine sides.

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5 hours ago, StarStruck said:

@Kshantivadin yes, that is breaking masculine frame.

Don't micromanage, rather look at the greater trend whether you are carry masculinity or not.

Communication happens on three levels: verbal, non-verbal and intention. You have to have clear intentions and preferably masculine intentions in a intimate relationship. When you are out and about with your intentions (verbally or nonverbally) she will be affected by that and be feminine in your presence.

Did you sleep with her? After you slept with her you can show more feminine sides.

No, but this one and I had a more intense connection, which is probably why I started expressing in that way. I wouldn't ever really even feel compelled to do it with someone I don't have a connection with. This one felt intense though. Also pretty man-to-woman. I really don't know what to think about that behavior.

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11 hours ago, Kshantivadin said:

@aurum why not both :P

In certain situations you either can’t cold approach or it just doesn’t make sense to.

But yes, as I already said, I recommended guys have cold approach as a skill. Just don’t have that be the only tool you have.


 

 

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19 hours ago, Kshantivadin said:

No, but this one and I had a more intense connection, which is probably why I started expressing in that way. I wouldn't ever really even feel compelled to do it with someone I don't have a connection with. This one felt intense though. Also pretty man-to-woman. I really don't know what to think about that behavior.

I get that. Don't micromanage by overanalyzing things. I started making progress when I focused on the learning process, instead of focusing on certain desired outcomes. I recommend the book Mindset by Carol Dweck.

 

17 hours ago, aurum said:

In certain situations you either can’t cold approach or it just doesn’t make sense to.

But yes, as I already said, I recommended guys have cold approach as a skill. Just don’t have that be the only tool you have.

What do you recommend to somebody who doesn't have the hot girl social circle for dating? Or more precisely.. how does one break into those circles?

Edited by StarStruck

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