Narcissistic Abusive Personalities part 2

[Preety_India]

This is the continuation of my old journal. 

I've some fresh insights that I get from time to time when I contemplate on my past relationships that involved emotional abuse, specifically narcissistic abuse. 

Disclaimer this journal is not about anyone here, it's my private experience of narcissistic abuse I faced at different points in my life. 

I request to not leave any comments in my journal. 

If you have any questions you can always ask me in personal messenger. Thanks for the understanding. 

(Please don't pm me  asking foolish personal details.. )

 

[Preety_India]

So the newest insight I recollect came from thinking about an incident with my ex who narrated a few incidents regarding his ex wife who had divorced him. 

One incident in particular where he stated how his ex wife framed him and it was no fault of his own 

My question was - well if that's the case then why did you go to jail again. 

And he had no answer for that. 

He went to jail even after the divorce. 

Now what I saw in this whole experience,  looking back at it now, is how he always minimized his role in everything and maximized her role in it. 

Narcissists always tend to do this. These are vital signs of a narcissist. 

They always twist the narrative to make themselves look innocent. 

Normal people don't do this. Normal people  simply admit to whatever they did clearly and succinctly. However narcissists carefully manipulate the outcome of a situation. 

 

[Preety_India]

The other thing that I observe with narcissists regularly is that they have a 2 faced attitude about them. 

That is one face for the public and the other for the private. 

Narcissists generally tend to appear appealing in public but very abusive in private. 

This I often observed with my ex. 

If we were at a grocery store, he would be super nice to me. 

Whereas privately he would get abusive. 

The best option here it to keep your communications with the narcissist mostly in public than in private. 

Remember they will never give you a closure over a situation and drag it out at your expense carrying the hostility forever. 

However if you communicated with them publicly, that's way better as they tend to offer some leniency. This is because of public pressure. 

This was very visible as an example in Justin Timberlake's situation. He recently apologized to Janet Jackson,  a black woman and singer. However it took him more than 15 years to apologize to both Britney Spears and Janet Jackson. All of this only because of mounting public pressure. 

You need to be good at smelling the rat. 

 

[Preety_India]

The other thing that I noticed with Narcissists (kinda ratting them out ) is that they have this Golden Boy or Golden Girl Syndrome. 

Will talk about this later. 

 

[Preety_India]

Yes the golden child syndrome. 

 

[Preety_India]

 

Indeed, it's difficult not to have been loved by one's parents, but there's a real challenge too in having been loved too much, which is regarded as 'the golden child syndrome. ' Golden children suffer from the immense burden of expectation placed on their shoulders by their parents.

 

[Preety_India]

 

 

 

 

[Natasha]

@Preety_India Perspective 

[Preety_India]

I recently discovered new insights on behavior of narcissists and that is that narcissists have a tendency to manipulate a situation to make themselves look better. 

For example - they might relate an incident that happened in the recent past and they will usually narrate the story in such a way that they will appear completely innocent and the other person (preferably a partner or a neighbor) would appear the guilty party. 

They will look like they did nothing wrong. However the reality is different. 

They definitely have had a fair share of a role in the whole situation. 

It isn't the way they describe. 

The situation is quite different. 

In fact the other party was probably just reacting. 

 

 

[Preety_India]

 

A nice case study for narcissism. 

This guy is showing pure paranoid delusions. 

Full of himself. Lying. Playing victim 

Narcissistic victim playing at its finest. 

Boasting about a career that doesn't exist. 

These signs are important to understand this disorder. 

The last thing that this person would want is a yes person around them. 

Because a truthful person would shatter their illusions. 

 

[Preety_India]

 

 

What more signs do I observe here that come quite close to NPD? 

• Boasting 
• Need for validation from others for victimhood
• False victimhood 
• Empty threats
• Intimidating demeanor 
• False narratives
• Karen syndrome 
• Trying to create a cult out of his fans 
• Insinuating 
• Wanting his fans to attack his brother. Incitement behavior 
• Racist tendencies 
• The biggest clue that this guy is a narcissist is the fact that he himself accuses his family of mistreatment and yet tells his fans to not drive a wedge. Typical Narcissist Double Bind. 
• Constant switching between accents and personalities
• Charles Manson tendency to keep rambling and hold attention of his fans and appear charming 
• Repetitive assertions of provocative victimhood. 
• Ticking time bomb behavior 
• The need to tape his interaction with his dog is THE BIGGEST RED FLAG. Why the need to show that other than the need to assert that he treats his dogs really well, when in reality it could be different? Narcissistic two faced fake sneaky behavior. 
• Calling himself the "Reigning Carter" is a sign of overt narcissism. 
• Charles Manson sarcastic style of speech delivery 
• Made up fake paranoid delusions that someone will attack him 
• Constant fidgeting and rapid eye movements. Extremely high insecurity 
• Bipolar manic episodes 
• Addiction to drugs 
• Holding illegal guns 
• Making false assumptions of conspiratorial plotting 
• Weed addiction 
• Raging tirades 
• Fidgeting, hand movements, repetitive speech, jerky movements, constant fiddling, Adderall?? 
• And the biggest flag is how he said that his girlfriend is non confrontational. This reminds me of my ex and how he said his first ex was non confrontational. BIG BIG BIG SIGN. this means that he is going to treat them like garbage and they won't mind., 
• Signs of histrionic personality disorder HPD. Spiraling out of control /down a dark hole
• Caring rhymes with Aaron. No Karen rhymes with it better. 
•  

 

[Preety_India]

Omg this guy is perfectly like my ex Joseph. But Joseph was much stronger and bulkier physically than this dude. 

But exactly like him with eye expressions and the way he would talk. 

Like lecturing and punishing me every minute. Same like this dude is doing to his girlfriend in the video. 

I was like the girl in the video, sitting quietly and silently beside Joseph 

And he would continue bashing me about his issues with the world and i had to swallow all his anger to be a good girlfriend to him 

It never works. They never change. They are narcissists. They won't change even if the girlfriend is totally devoted. 

Seeing this video reminded so many aspects of my past abusive relationship. 

Even the phrases are the same.. 

Joseph used to say "don't you understand this, don't you know this?" 

"you see now, they are manipulating you" 

And in the end he would call me a dumbass for being too slow to catch up. 

Total control and abuse. It's hard to leave the abuser because they create deep fear for leaving them. I can understand why she is not leaving the dude. I have been there done that.. 

The responsibility is also mine. 

But there are too many factors. 

I was alone with Joseph in the US. 

Alone in a strange country. I felt trapped and cornered by his overpowering demeanor. 

I had absolutely no social support. No friends.. No family support. 

I had my money. But zero emotional support. Somehow Joseph was my pillar for emotional support and that's what he used to his advantage. 

Narcissistic abusers can sense your emotional and mental weaknesses and easily gain your trust and keep manipulating you. 

The video is a perfect example of narcissistic abuse in full display. 

Joseph told me to break up with every friend I had known before, completely isolating me socially. 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

Just like the girl in the video above doesn't look into her boyfriend's eyes during a confrontation, I never had the courage to look into Joseph's eyes. 

I used to look elsewhere or down if he looked at me. Those are signs of submissive behavior. 

And he used to keep rambling loudly. 

I remember his stare. His stare was deep and frightening. 

I will call it the typical Narcissist's Stare. 

They have a typical stare. You see it in Charles Manson. They never take their eyes off and give a "scanning you right now" kind of stare.  Their stare is bold and frightening. 

It creates fear in the body of the victim 

 

[diamondpenguin]

@Preety_India I don't see what the problem is. Those are just normal people. It's just spine. That's a requirement to live. 

[Preety_India]

@diamondpenguin you're too inexperienced to argue with me on it. So just leave it. 

If you haven't lived it, you won't know it. 

 

[diamondpenguin]

@Preety_India You think your such hot shit talking down to me like. But Brian ain't gonna take your disrespect. I suggest you cut your attitude right now. Because it makes me sick you going here all the time just trying to prove that your better me. Have some respect. Seriously Preety have some "RESPECT". 

[diamondpenguin]

@Preety_India Also I love you and have a nice day❤✌. 

Edited April 6, 2021 by diamondpenguin

[Preety_India]

Not bothered about you one bit. Go away 

 

 

[Preety_India]

You and your fake love. Who cares?

 

[Preety_India]

Coming here to lecture me.