Got triggered hard from political/religious opinion

[Raze]

This isn't as serious a problem as the other stuff in this forum but I'll post it anyway. I realize I can get triggered from certain religious/political opinions that disagree with mine. I won't go into specifics as to what it is because really it's an emotional and not logical thing and I don't want to start off topic discussion. I really don't want to feel this kind of discomforting sadness or anger over anyone's opinions even if their opinion is actually a personal attack towards me, and I don't think I do for most things.

But recently I saw a specific political/religious attack on an online comment and it affected me strangely deeply, possibly because I tried resisting it more then usual, it also had a lot of likes and other agreeing comments so maybe subconsciously I felt like I was being attacked by the majority opinion. I also saw someone in the replies getting triggered and flaming over it and I felt a deep sadness for them because I knew what it is like. When I saw it I felt a kind of bubbling sensation of anger around my face and I knew this time was worse then usual. I've seen it in the past and felt nothing / mild anger, but this time it ticked me off. Now it keeps creeping back into my thoughts and making me feel bitter and angry. Even a little nauseous and losing my appetite sometimes. I didn't reply but I went through the entire page of comments, disliking anything that said the opinion, there were a lot.

I think it's because as a kid I saw this specific thing online and it shocked me, I felt deeply disturbed as if it was a personal attack on me and my family, I argued about it for long hours online flaming over it, and I stuffed all this anger into my subconscious and it's now resurfaced.

Furthermore it's somehow made me remember a instance in my past and make me get even angrier over it then I was at the time. Basically at school a teacher relayed this opinion among others during the course that deeply offended me, and I felt the same bubbling anger back then but much less so, and I actually don't think I felt that affected by it and kind of shrugged it off. I even see that professor around sometimes and the first few times I didn't feel that poorly, but every other time I see him it seems to shock my system a little more.

An example of how much it bothered me, I start feeling an anger in the back of my mind directed at strangers as if they all must think this way and are also personally against me, at my first day in a new class I felt this very heavily. I also have strange thoughts about hurting the people who I saw saying the triggering opinion (not my teacher, but rather people online who I didn't see in person, maybe because I don't have a face to see).

Other things that may be adding to it. I started nofap recently to stop my depression and it's working, but I also feel more irritable, more anxious, and more nervous, this is probably happening because I also took a strong anti depressant that I now quit which had a side effect of causing anxiety, even though I didn't feel that anxiety while I took it (but I did feel depressed).

I really hate this feeling and I don't want to feel this way, even if I'm 100% right but everyone around me not only agrees with it but also personally hates me, (which I know isn't true of course), I still wouldn't want to feel this cornered. I'd rather just be at ease and accept it.

If anyone's gone through something similar and gotten past it I'd appreciate advice and resources. And please don't try and speculate what the opinion that triggered me is...

Edited September 2, 2019 by Raze

[Chuco]

I think the only way would be to get perspective.  The only reason and ego/belief structure can get angry and defensive and scared is because it knows that it is made of thin air. It is, like all of reality, something created out of nothing. It is not possible for you to "not get angry" or "be at peace" because you ARE it. There is nothing else. You are the one who got angry, so you are also the only one who can let that go. For you to be at peace, a part of you has to die. One gets triggered by a political ideology or religious faction because they have a part of themselves invested in it.

Notice that all of your beliefs, all the justifications and so on are just created out of thin air. They are baseless if you remove the context. Notice that emptiness. That emptiness is MOST obvious the moment you are getting triggered.

So Maybe watch some politician you disagree with. Watch videos of ideas you don't like. Read all the comments. Notice that hollowness arising within you. What does that say about the nature of your Self.

Edited September 2, 2019 by Chuco

[crab12]

The way to move past this is, you understand why other people are having that opinion, understand their perspective, what has led them to believe in that opinion, understand how they feel about this. Place yourself in their life as if you were them, empathize with them. Hell, discuss it with them if you just can't fathom it by yourself.

This is emotionally the most difficult thing to do in this situation, which is a good indicator that it's the correct thing to do. You want to demonize them. You will be tempted to conclude that "they believe so because they are idiots and evil humans". But that's silly. They are not idiots nor evil, they are just  like you, only that their life experience and circumstances have been different from yours.

If you are able to do this, you will grow as a person and the hurt will dissolve. I totally understand if you can't, most people can't. The fact that you don't really understand their position and you are trying to resist / fight it is what's causing the hurt, not the opinion itself.

PS that's was smart of you not to reveal the opinion itself, then you would have just gotten biased answers.

Edited September 3, 2019 by crab12

[Nahm]

On 9/1/2019 at 10:49 PM, Raze said:

This isn't as serious a problem as the other stuff in this forum but I'll post it anyway. I realize I can get triggered from certain religious/political opinions that disagree with mine.

There’s only serious, if you say so. 

What is an opinion, other than one passing thought?

One of the benefits of daily morning meditation, is detachment from the thoughts and opinions one formed an identity with. Without the identity, there’s nothing to defend. Without defensiveness, reaction is naturally realized, “replaced”, with creation. Then, you’ll be so enamored with the life you’re creating, you’ll want to be helpful, rather than be offended / defensive / offensive. 

Don’t underestimate your own sneakiness. 

[Raze]

Thanks for the advice.

[remember]

@Raze  it sounds as if you could profit of doing chakra work - the bubbling feeling reminds me of something @Emerald said in a video. i don`t really have very strong vishuddha feelings as a grown up anymore, because i usually don`t let it go to the head so much anymore just speak what i think and if the emotion is strong i just sometimes engage in it even though i know it`s leading to nowhere. but you see if no one would speak up, these people would feel more supported in their worldview.

for me it sounds as if your vishuddha asks you to learn to communicate in a way where you really reach a person like that and make them think about their standpoints, and even if it`s just for a minute. it`s not bad to communicate your anger, the anger is in a sense healthy, you just need to work on the way to express it.

maybe journaling could be a way, too. you could even start vlogging on youtube if your content is good. maybe at one point you get so good with expressing it that 50% or more of the people love you for speaking up. you will never be loved by everyone as they might just not always get how much love you are, even though that would be a dream to be loved by everyone. i can say sometimes it`s worth it from own experience.

Edited September 4, 2019 by remember
by the way 50% of youtube would be huge, here on the forum you could even make it to maybe 90% if you are doing good, not a challenge just that you can try yourself here as 50% minimum here already love you by the nature of your being