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ahmet sukru

My weird lsd experience

9 posts in this topic

Hi,
I did my second lsd trip and I would appriciate comments and advices from experienced friends.
I am meditating for 1.5 years and I am into psychology and personal development. 
My first trip was 2 weeks ago. It was pretty good and I felt pretty amazing even if I didn't trip deep as I read trip reports. (I used 250u for my both trips but thats just what they told me, I'm not exactly sure)
So for second one, I wanted to go deeper and solve some internal things. I want to make some decisions about my life, draw a direction for my artistic career and figure out myself better.
So I prepeared so well for my second one. 
I closed my telephone, meditaded for 2 hours, made some breathwork etc. And even I wrote down some questions to my notebook that I want to solve. I was feeling well before I take the lsd.
But the trip was soo weak that I was disappointed and felt down after I wait 1-2 hours. Maybe because of my first trip was two weeks ago (please inform me if it is too short to wait)
But maybe the second lsd I tried was not good. 
After a couple hours of very weak lsd trip, I was feeling down and I decided to go to bed and closed my eyes. Weirdness started here;
I started to see some weird figures when I close my eyes. (not like hallucinations, They were gone when I open my eyes but I just see them when I close my eyes)
My everyday problems started to rise and bother me. And they became alive like little creatures (like interesting 3d lsd animations) 
Even things that I don't take as a big problem started to grow and bother me. My life was seen like a shit to me by the time.
Then those little "problem creatures" started to merge and became one big weird monster with octopus legs. And a lot of familiar faces was floating around and it was disturbing.
I watched those figures 1-2 hours before I was able to sleep.
But nothing has been solved. I was expecting to view them from a higher perspective and come up with answers. But I just saw monsters and shit and thats it.
Is it normal? Am I expecting wrong thing? Is it because my trip was weak, because I waited too short or my lsd was bad? 

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How was your mind-body oriented in the weeks prior to the trip? What type of work did you put in the weeks prior to the trip: meditation, yoga, contemplation, self inquiry etc. Or had you been preoccupied and worrying about life problems a lot?

Also, did you set intentions prior to the trip? And, I would sit up with awareness during a trip.

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46 minutes ago, Serotoninluv said:

How was your mind-body oriented in the weeks prior to the trip? What type of work did you put in the weeks prior to the trip: meditation, yoga, contemplation, self inquiry etc. Or had you been preoccupied and worrying about life problems a lot?

Also, did you set intentions prior to the trip? And, I would sit up with awareness during a trip.

I didn't prepeare for weeks but I did yoga, 2 hours of meditation and breathwork that day.
I've been doing meditation for 1.5 years (not much self inquiry, I must work on my career and life more right now)
I don't worry a lot (like a panic) but there are lots of things that I need to handle on my life. I am making very risky moves (like quiting my job and going after art career etc) but those are the things that I want to solve with lsd.
But I am relatively calm and positive on my everyday life. Also those problems were also there on my first trip too, but I didn't experience any badtrip (but also I was not alone)
I think I set my intention well. I was in very meditative mode but since the trip was too weak after 2-3 hours, I got bored and opened my computer and listened some music.

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Sometimes when I trip, the trip takes on a theme of the previous week or so. Perhaps there might be some subconscious energy around life problems surfacing? Yet sometimes, trips just seem to be random and wacky.

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1 minute ago, Serotoninluv said:

Sometimes when I trip, the trip takes on a theme of the previous week or so. Perhaps there might be some subconscious energy around life problems surfacing? Yet sometimes, trips just seem to be random and wacky.

It might be that way, but how can I get profound results with that?
Or on some trips are profound and you come up with answers and some are like this? 
Or as your trip gets deeper, it becomes more profound?
By the way, is 2 weeks short to wait between two trips?

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@ahmet sukru I haven't used psychedelics as a personal development tool or to find answers. I don't think it would work well for me in that way because my ego would be assuming that the sober reality is real and the psychedelic reality is a place it can go to get stuff to bring back to sober life. For me, psychedelics are about existential states of being. Ego death. Nonduality. The Eternal Now. Hyper intuition and empathy. Entering different realms. Usually it has nothing to do with my sober life. The whole story of "me" dissolves. My profound trips aren't really about "me" (other than me having to surrender). My sober character has changed through the process, for example I can connect to other humans much more easily and deeply.

I've known people that have used psychedelics for personal growth and to get clarity on life decisions and goals. Yet psychedelics have had the opposite effect on me.

Perhaps the little monster problems arose from your subconscious trying to communicate with you. Or, maybe not.

After two weeks, your tolerance will completely reset and you can trip again. It sounds like you will be good to go since your last trip wasn't very intense and there is much to integrate. You may want to bump up the dose a bit.

 

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8 hours ago, Serotoninluv said:

@ahmet sukru I haven't used psychedelics as a personal development tool or to find answers. I don't think it would work well for me in that way because my ego would be assuming that the sober reality is real and the psychedelic reality is a place it can go to get stuff to bring back to sober life. For me, psychedelics are about existential states of being. Ego death. Nonduality. The Eternal Now. Hyper intuition and empathy. Entering different realms. Usually it has nothing to do with my sober life. The whole story of "me" dissolves. My profound trips aren't really about "me" (other than me having to surrender). My sober character has changed through the process, for example I can connect to other humans much more easily and deeply.

I've known people that have used psychedelics for personal growth and to get clarity on life decisions and goals. Yet psychedelics have had the opposite effect on me.

Perhaps the little monster problems arose from your subconscious trying to communicate with you. Or, maybe not.

After two weeks, your tolerance will completely reset and you can trip again. It sounds like you will be good to go since your last trip wasn't very intense and there is much to integrate. You may want to bump up the dose a bit.

 

Thanks a lot for your answer :)

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I'm gonna jump in re: tolerance too.

Tolerance is a bit complex. 

2 weeks could be too early. You definitely trip after 2 weeks, but theres some less chance of that groundbreaking magic. You can't expect the level of magic that you'd otherwise get with a much longer break.

On the other hand, sometimes you get the magic anyways, even the next day or a couple days later, depending on what's going on in life, your energy flow, your environment.

Theres so much interplay with your life and psyche with psychedelics, it's so different from other drugs that are more directly causational.

Sex is a really good analogy. You can definitely have amazing sex right two days in a row, but it's less likely to be amazing that second time the next day than if you waited a few more days. Adjusted for your own libido and recharge times ;)

Likewise for psychedelics there is a recharge period and it's going to depend a lot on your own personal "psychedelic libido" let's say, where you're at in your life, what's going on in that moment and so on.

I think the stress affected the trip. It definitely would for me anyways.

Another possibility is that the tabs were not evenly laid, and that you actually dosed a lot less the second time. That can happen.

Theres also seems to be some plain randomness to response.

Personally at this point I'm never disappointed with a weak trip..I find a lot of value at pretty much any dosage.

Edit: another thing to add.. the negative content of your trip is not to be blamed on "bad acid". If its LSD, its LSD. LSD is LSD is LSD. The trip doesnt come from the drug, it comes from your mind. The drug just potentates your mind, it's an open-ended and powerful catalyst.


How to get to infinity? Divide by zero.

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