How To Deal With Abusive Parents & The Given Mindset

[HypSandar]

My dad beats me, ever since i can remember, he doesn't just beat me, its brutal. Talking hammer or whatever harmful looking object is nearby.

This affects my family a lot, especially me. He doesn't just beat me, he lies and he made me believe that i have  mental issues, though its him.

Reporting to the police wont do any good, he comes back and looks for 'vengeance'. Through self development i learned to forgive no matter how brutal it is, but now i don't see the point of it no more. I don't feel the need for vengeance unless i'm in the 'adrenaline' mode of sort, but maybe it was my fault, perhaps i shouldn't have forgiven him for the very first scar he made, perhaps then he would have changed. Life isn't happy self developemnt and some people are not lazy, they may have excuses but they are not lies or in the so called 'victim mode'.

 

Put yourself in my situation, you grew up thinking you are doing something wrong as your father beats you up, your mother is on his side because she doesn't think he'd beat his own kid if for no good reason or simply fears. I never had a childhood. You try to learn, but you can't because you live in a small house, sharing a room with your father as your mother and father fight all the time.

Example of similar everyday bullshit: Father cant find a pen, he makes up huge tension and yells, mom yells, they both yell at you even though you have no clue where the pen/object is and are just trying to watch a video/read a book. 

[egoeimai]

1)remove all harmful objects from his sight. 

2)go to a therapist to heal your traumas that your awful parent has caused you 

3)go and live with grandparents if thats possible 

4)your father needs a psychiatrist asap. And medication. For real. 

But first do something to protect your psyche. You dont deserve all that, try to figure out what to do, best thing is to go live with grandparents or something 

[HypSandar]

1) I have no right to move around harmful objects, there will always be something around, its not my house.

2) I tried that when i was a kid, therapists eat shit most of the time

3) My grandparents are long dead

4) I tell him that and i'm dead.

Edited September 1, 2017 by HypSandar

[Gabriel Antonio]

Dude, I feel for you. I can sense how serious of how a situation you're in. 

Remember: Every being that has a lot of light also has a lot of shadow. So, in a way, you can use this suffering you've been carrying as a way to summon your inner phoenix. 

Leo has already made a video about a similar topic: Abusive Relationships. Compassion is not always fruity, sometimes it means cutting ties completely. You are being mentally and physically abused. This is a dysfunction and has to stop. 

You haven't mentioned how old you are, but have you considered moving to a Buddhist monastery? Seek some sort of help. You can even do it in smaller doses. For example, have you ever taken yoga classes? You need to find a community. You probably has a lot of emotional BS stored in your body. So, yoga not only will help you release tons of emotional baggage; it will also help you find a sangha, a community of friends.  

I feel very sorry for all that you have been through. You might have scars that won't heal in this lifetime. Another thing to think about for the future: psychedelics (done with RESPONSIBILITY). They can help you extricate yourself from this huge quagmire of shit you're in. 

I wish I could give you a more direct solution, but I simply don't have one. You have gotta start your own healing journey. Psychologists are psychiatrists are not needed. The trick is: become your own psychologist. Breathing exercises are the bomb, and you can learn them in yoga. 

Wish you all the best! 

[HypSandar]

Thanks, i did consider joining a buddist temple/monastery though i'm from Serbia in Europe but not a part of the European Union so i have no rights to leave for more then 3 months. The place has no temples, also i'm 16. :}

[HypSandar]

On 9/1/2017 at 7:00 PM, HypSandar said:

also i'm 16. :}