spicy_pickles

Cutting Back On Bad Habits

17 posts in this topic

Hey everyone,

Really glad this forum exists!  I've been listening to the videos for awhile. 

I'm in the process of changing some habits. A big one as of late has been drinking. Definitely not in excess, but the 2-3 beers every night adds up. This morning, I woke up and felt horrible. I made the decision enough was enough.

I am proud to say not only did I not have a beer this evening, I stopped by the gym and had a workout. I also politely declined a request to go out for a drink. Small steps!

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Sounds good. You realized there is something bad going on. I guess it motivates more and it's longer lasting if you take small steps.

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Coming into my own, I too have decided that my bad habits are ruining my life slowly and surely.  I decided this evening to atleast make a conscious effort towards cleanup: I drew a line down the middle of a page and wrote out all of my bad habits and all of my good habits...,  I have a really bad addiction to the internet... I even know how bad it is as I notice it and still do nothing about it...i feel that most of my bad habits actually umbrella under the term internet addiction. (I play Warcraft as well as warcraft3, internet dating, not actually dating, chess.com, facebooktwittr, youtube, porn, fake job hunting even real job hunting...) It is hard because even though I notice myself looking at a time wasting app on my phone i still do it anyway as a crutch for social anxiety and or loneliness, like checking my phone before i get out of my car in all parking lots even though there is no notification...also socially, even when I see women my age looking at their phones I want to say to them 'your phone is consuming your life' yet I don't have the courage and instead just say something stupid or nothing at all..digressing a bit...so I wrote down my goods and my bads and I certianly have other bad habits as well and maybe this is a question for Leo or any greatly habitual, healthy, self-actualized person... is it possible to actually completely eliminate all unhealthy or bad habits especially internet addiction?

How do other's cope with their internet addiction?

also, good for you spicy pickles for cutting back on drinking. 8]

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@kris4114 Hey there, I'd like to give you a bit of advice which helped me some time ago:

Go and identify your most "negative" bad habit and deal with that in the first place. You've mentioned that you have a drinking problem, so go with that first. Also take a look on the things you eat. Most addictions are born of not being able to cope with the reality itself. Funny thing is, to be able to really cope with reality and really "own it" for yourself (which is all there is actually), you must first get rid of "quick fixes" and things that cloud your vision. Alcohol, sex, drugs, junk food, social medias are most common and maybe even considered normal in today's society.

So my friend, just start with the "chemical" ones like alcohol and food. Mind what you eat, mind what you drink. Be in a present moment and KNOW things shall get better. They most surely will become better, of that I can assure you. You will know when you are strong enough to make next step(s), just be patient. Remember to take "baby steps" with focus on keeping your mind clear as much as possible. The blueprint for YOU and NOW is simple: get sober, start eating healthy.

Good luck, take care of yourself and most importantly, don't give up! Namaste.

- TK

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On 24/02/2016 at 5:47 PM, kris4114 said:

is it possible to actually completely eliminate all unhealthy or bad habits especially internet addiction?

How do other's cope with their internet addiction?

also, good for you spicy pickles for cutting back on drinking. 8]

@kris4114 I am guilty of being addicted to the internet. I constantly check my phone, reply to messages, emails, always on instagram and twitter and Facebook (my justification is, I run a business and have convinced myself, I need to forever be on social media. However, I am very selective with what I read and people I follow on instragram and twitter. I only like to use my time with things that inspire me, challenge my way of thinking or things that may help me with my business. 

The only way to get rid of old or any habits is first changing your mindset. How bad do you want a healthy lifestyle? how badly do you want to be happy with yourself? I honestly believe if you want something bad enough, that is enough motivation for you to go out and get it. Will it be hard and challenging? Yes? You will need to make yourself uncomfortable, you will need to challenge your thoughts and behaviours and you have to be dedication to the change despite the challenges you face. Tell yourself over and over again that you are going to be all in and that you won't give in to comfort or settling when you are capable of so much more. 

I struggled with the fear of social anxiety and lonlieness and it was really tough for me, but I kept telling myself, the only way I am going to beat this, is put myself out there to be judged, to be challenged and instead of running away from fear, I am going to face it and do everything in my power to create the best life I can for me. 

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@Jay Brown

7 hours ago, Jay Brown said:

Also you could be taking baby steps till you die and never change. 

Possible, but if you really want to change, you can. Baby steps are a good start and everybody has his/her own pace.

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@Anna Cold Turkey works best, just stop everything. dont think about it dont talk about it, dont anything about it, much more easier. if you set a pace you are kinda setting limits and when you set limits you have already decided that you aint quiting till another year or so,

 

Edited by Jay Brown

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@Jay Brown This is not what I meant. If this works for YOU ok, but this is not working for everyone that well.

 

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9 hours ago, Anna said:

but if you really want to change, you can

 (Y)

 

7 minutes ago, Anna said:

If this works for YOU ok

@Anna Point taken

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@Jay Brown Basically what I mean is at first you really have to find your will to change. Depending on what it is and how much it expands in your daily life, this facts determine the time you need to solve your problem.

Some problems can't be solved just by one step. Behavior is not changed in a short period of time neither.

And I especially see the drinking problem or taking drugs in general as a long way. Therefor and in the case of @spicy_pickles it is more motivating to compliment him for his first little steps. We notice, compliment and want to keep him on track with good advices. It's hard to change habits.

Trying to do it in one big step, could go wrong drastically and make everything worse. Some people fall off track and are extremely afraid they could fail again and again.

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@Anna Thank you for elaborating, it make more sense to me now when you say it could go south entirely, however i used to consume heroin and loved it but once i could see how fucked up it was i went cold turkey and now m clean 6 months and have no intentions of going back there, the way i look at it is "been there done that" get do new things all the time to learn from it, you fall you learn you get back up and next time you wont fall atleast not in the same pit, quitting should not be hard on anyone we are way fucking stronger than that                                                                                                                                                                   

Edited by Jay Brown

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@Jay Brown Wow, that's impressive! Especially heroin is a hard thing to work on and you just did it. You are really determined. Look, you say: "once I could see how fucked up it was" and "have no intentions of going back there" you have these powerful thoughts which hold you back from falling off track. That's why you are strong and there is literally no chance for the addiction to come back.

I understand your point of view. I think so too in some other areas for example "food" and "eating healthy". I know how to change my eating habits if I want to, because it's my job and passion, BUT I see my patients struggle with the smallest things. Some people block if you are about to change too much too fast. They are demotivated, because they fail. So we are setting long-term goals and take small steps to achieve it. My patients are really euphoric when they come to me and tell me "I DID IT!".

Because of my experience with drug addicts (+ several other diseases), I'm very careful with recommendations. It can backfire hardly.

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@Jay Brown Quitting cold turkey is an effective way, but it only works if you really want to change. If you really really really want to change. It's like all of a sudden your perspective changes and you see how terrible and damaging your previous behaviour was.

I usually quit things cold turkey. But I am an extremist. I either really do something or I don't do it at all. There is no I do something a little. I always overdo it to a point where I am forced to quit.

  • I have quit alcohol cold turkey, because of extreme emotional distress I got from it.
  • I quit smoking weed everyday cold turkey because I thought this is kinda dumb.
  • I quit fapping everyday cold turkey, because I saw the huge amount of emotional self harm I was inflicting on myself.

@Anna Drug addiction is not a disease!

 

 

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Thank you for the video,

 

I still smoke up everyday, but open to your take on the herb

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@A Lone Wanderer You're right, not meant to claim that, sorry. I just wanted to explain how complicated my patients are. They have drug addictions AND diseases because of that.

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