Question and Complaint

[Thought Art]

So, recently I received 3 warning points for name calling and swearing. I’ll include the clip from a much longer and well thought out post sharing my perspective on people calling this place a cult. It included general statements against that idea and also included some emotional aspects of the frustrations I feel. 
 

But before I do that we should consider the double standards here. I am on Leo Gura’s forum. Leo in blog posts regularly calls people’s rats, fools, morons. (Not all the time but enough). He even recently said “fuck you”. All of his word choices are similar to mine and in the context of how I said it. 

Now, I’ve been on this forum for years , made over 10,000 posts (no prior warning points), I’ve been a mod and believe my efforts as a mod help make this place safer and less dramatic. 
 

I feel like I should have been given a verbal warning and chance to fix the comment, or idk. Acknowledgement of the context, Leo’s use of words at times as they do in theory.

Either way, I am extremely passionate about this work, this forum, and I stand by my comments. I’ve had to cut through so many views, opinions and self doubts over the year and I’ve spend thousands of hours listening to Leo’s work. You wanna call this place a cult?! Fuck you! 
 

But, know I respect you and I know reality is complicated. And I forgive you too. 😄

Edited 4 hours ago by Thought Art

[Thought Art]

Here is my original post. @Sincerity You say this was directed toward a user, there is clearly not even an @ on the original post. Also, I’m sharing this here because instead of communicating your name calling and shutting down the discussion. 
 

This is true. I recall having a 5meodmt trip and was like… “It was something but was it God? Was it infinity?” And Leo replied like “It’s infinity!!!!”…

My response to that is still… yeah I’ve had profound experiences in it. But, I truly, totally, don’t understand it. And, I have more trips that would be required to do so. And, I can let Leo influence me, or Martin Ball or anyone else. 
 

I find when I’m not in that state that I’m distant from it, and it seems foreign and unrelated to my experience. I know the experience is profound, divine and I recall grasping that reality is infinite, that it’s mind, that qualia is God, and a realization of solipsism. But, it’s gonna take more trips for me, more contemplation, meditation, and true spiritual work to come to my own knowing. 
 

Leo’s proclaimations are interesting, other schools of spirituality and teachers provide useful concepts. But, I know ultimately I have to conclude what is true for me. I’m not gonna be pressured or brainwashed by Leo, or any other teacher. 
 

NN-DMT though, is u deniable in what it reveals about the nature of consciousness and reality. It’s literally an infinite mind. Infinite imagination is my conclusion from it. 
 

I have more work to do in my contemplative work, my spiritual maturity and developing my own epistemic foundation free from anyone else’s dogma, personality or bullshit. 
 

Everyone on this forum caught in their petty fucking bullshit too is beside the point of why I am here.
 

Leo is the only teacher I’ve come across who taught me powerful principles all distilled into a single catalog and I’m grateful for that. But, I have to question everything. I have to build my own model, have my own experiences and awakening and live my own life. 
 

A challenge is I’ve spent hundreds of hours listening to Leo.. but also others like Osho, Lee Holden, Lester Levonson, eckhart Tolle, Sadhguru, and many others. I’ve read deep and profound non-dual books and dialogues like that of Ramana Maharishi, and Abn Arabi. I deeply enjoy these non-dual works. I’ve read and will continue to read Peter Ralston, Buddhist texts and books and that of Taoism. I like Bryan Johnson, learning about it health, fitness, different cultures, philosophy, etc. All of human knowledge interests me. Consciousness interests me, awakening does too and I’ve read various teachers on this subject. 
 

You wanna accuse me of being a small brain cult follower? Go fuck yourself you complete moron. Fuck you. You can put me into a box in your own mind but I don’t frankly care. I’m gonna keep learning, studying, growing and maturing and I don’t give a fuck about morons who don’t get the fucking picture of what we are doing here. 

Leo tries but can do better at encouraging followers of his work on their own contemplations. 

I think as a teacher he could improve by encouraging my own conclusion instead of just blurting this view. Leo doesn’t have enough data about anyone here to truly guide them on the forum, generally, in a lot of circumstances. 
 

There are serious flaws and challenges in all teachers and systems for learning. Get used to it. We are all lost out in the same sea. 

[Natasha Tori Maru]

What exactly are you hoping to achieve here? 

[Thought Art]

@Natasha Tori Maru Remove warning points, fairness

[Ero]

Why don’t you follow through?

 

[Thought Art]

@Ero I don’t intend to return to using the forum. Leo’s blog is getting better. I’ve invested so much into the videos and I still follow honestly from the backgrounds. But, far less. 
 

It just feels like, I know I don’t deserve these points. So, I’m engaging in a healthy conflict. 
 

Also, at the end of the day I’m free to change my mind if I see fit…

Edited 2 hours ago by Thought Art

[Ero]

1 minute ago, Thought Art said:

@Ero Leo’s blog is getting better. 

It’s gotten worse. But I feel you. I owe this place so much.

[Thought Art]

@Ero No his recent posts are better imo. 
 

Anyway, for me I don’t want to engage here. This is just something where I felt like I never fully pushed back on it.