Sober Thoughts

[eos_nyxia]

----placeholder text---- 

[Zigzag Idiot]

In my mind a placeholder is someone so independent minded yet trustworthy that they act on one’s behalf when it’s needed while one is absent. They don’t seek influential power but act only from a place of benevolence.

Their humility compliments their confidence like a cool breeze on a warm day. They are the good Samaritans who do not judge.

[MuadDib]

Edited August 22 by MuadDib
Image is hyperlinked

[eos_nyxia]

If this is all there is, then it's all I have to work with.

 

 

Edited September 11 by eos_nyxia
Not another word now about any of this.

[eos_nyxia]

Who exactly are "my people"? 

And what does it even mean to "find them" anymore?

Edited September 23 by eos_nyxia
To still be asking this question, at -----my age-----, after giving up repeatedly.

[LastThursday]

Hi. Good questions I'd say. To my simple analytical brain there's two strands to the answer: support and reflection. 

Firstly, stick to the people who support you, want the best for you, give you attention you need and generally want to "big you up" in every way, and then reflect that support back to them in the same way. Conversely avoid like the plague, the people that don't do those things and that generally drag you down.

Secondly, notice the parts of yourself that appear or are reflected in the words, actions and traits of others. Nearly never in my experience do you find someone who perfectly reflects yourself, it's more of a pick and mix of attributes from different people - you need all those people to make a whole "you" reflected back. Sometimes it's even useful to see the crappy parts of yourself in others so you can become aware, but don't overdo that bit!

Why would you want yourself reflected in others? Because that's your centre or home position or cozy spot. You can add flourish and garnish to it, whatever excites you. 

Where to find these people? No answer. I'm working on that myself.

[eos_nyxia]

@LastThursday

I've been sitting on your thoughts for over a week.  This part especially, as in, I'm not sure what to do with it... 

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Secondly, notice the parts of yourself that appear or are reflected in the words, actions and traits of others. Nearly never in my experience do you find someone who perfectly reflects yourself, it's more of a pick and mix of attributes from different people - you need all those people to make a whole "you" reflected back. Sometimes it's even useful to see the crappy parts of yourself in others so you can become aware, but don't overdo that bit!

I actually don't know how much I want to see myself directly reflected in another, at least right now at this point in my life. I still crave it, and yet I still struggle with allowing myself to be seen. Intuitively, I know what you're saying to be true though!

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Where to find these people? No answer. I'm working on that myself.

 

I'm usually pretty good with this part, once I can figure out what I actually want.  

[LastThursday]

@eos_nyxia craving, desire, want, need, are the supporting structures of the temple, and need regular upkeep and devotion. 

Just notice to start with, nothing more. It's funny because I suspect I'm in the opposite camp where I actively want to be seen. It's neither here nor there though, I just see it as a natural disposition rather than an imposition as such. Freedom of choice is the way to happiness. It's like how an opera singer with a large dynamic range allows them to sing more songs and be more versatile. Being able to be seen, even if it wouldn't come naturally, would allow you greater dynamic range and choice. And, it wouldn't be a constant "on" switch in any case, sometimes you're unseen, sometimes you're seen. Likewise in my case, being comfortable with not being seen, would improve things for me too and make me less neurotic 🤪