Lets Talk: Women, Money and Game

[Zenterus]

I want to hear from the women here mostly, but also from the men who have successfully attracted a high quantity and quality of women in their lives.

For many years, I believed the mantra "Looks and Money don't matter as long as you have good game," which was popularized by dating companies such as RSD back in the day.

While that was a great delusional belief to get me started on approaching women and getting busy, over 10 years ago now, I have since learned that that wasn't entirely true.

My results with women have definitely dramatically increased since taking care of my appearance more (grooming, fitness, fashion) and as I worked on other areas of my life too.

Yet even then, I still bought into a lot of pickup artist concepts, such as being a Lover (the fun, short term, dominant, masculine guy that women have quick meaningless sex with) over a Provider (the boyfriend, the stable and secure type of guy with a good job) and as a result never cared too much about having a lot of money in relation to dating.

However, now, I'm at a weird place in my life.

Casual relationships are no longer doing it for me and I have decided to pursue the highest quality of women that I can in order to settle down with one and live happily ever after. These women are glamorous, have good jobs, very pretty, are posted on instagram with Louis Vuiton bags and Gucci and Versace. Of course, not all of them are like this, but I have noticed that the most beautiful women do seem to have their lives very well together.

And, naturally, this aroused a lot of insecurity in me as of late.

I'm not super secure financially -- dont even have a drivers license -- which is something that I'm actively working on. This has never been a concern for me before, as mentioned, but now that Im actually interested in a long term relationship, it's starting to weigh in on my confidence.

I've dated VERY attractive women before, women of high status in my city and even attracted local celebrities, so i know it's possible but I still feel insecure about it.

This is magnified further cause a woman I've been seeing lately started being slow to respond to my texts after coming over to my place for the first time (we always went to hers until then), and my mind is constructing this narrative around her losing interest because she realized I'm not financially more abundant than her. Who knows, though.

I know some will say "dont worry about women now and just focus on your finances" but I don't want to reject myself and, to be honest, I want to prove to myself that I can do it regardless.

So my question is as follows: How does money influence a man's attractiveness in a woman's eyes? Especially now that women seem to be way more financially secure than most men?

[Valach]

That is impossible to answer. There are just way too many different woman, even among the "most" attractive ones. Some of them will care very much, some of them really don't. Obviously those who do not are not as visible because they do not have instagrams full of expensive things etc. But yeah, if you want to have a stable, healthy relationship, you have to be somewhat stable - but not just financially.

Another question is though, why do you desire these specific woman for a relationship. Me personally, I am not really a materialistic person and I would not enjoy company of such woman. I feel like often we desire these "top-level" woman just to prove our own worth to ourselfs, not out of genuine liking.

[Zenterus]

@Valach I dont necessarily want a materialistic woman. I've dated one before and was perpetually annoyed by her. Just because a woman is well put together and wears designer things doesnt mean she's materialistic necessarily (although it definitely is a symptom).

What I do want, is a top tier girl who I would feel represents the culmination of all the work I've put into myself. I could not be with an average in attractiveness girl, without feeling like I'm settling when I know I can attract better.

[Valach]

I mean, to be buying designer clothes is already materialism. Again, it does seem like the woman is extension of yourself in a way. Of you self-value in this case. I am struggling with the same thing so not judging, but I see this so often in the pickup community.

You don't really care that much that your job is 7/10, your health or your friends are 7/10, why does the woman have to be 10/10? It often is because we project our own self worth onto her.

What is your experience with dating/being in relationship with those top tier woman. I did date couple of them myself and I found that they are usually terrible at relationships. In a way the sheer options they have and the constant admiration and validations corrupts the soul. If I had to be born a woman in my next life and my intention was to have a healthy, mature relationships I would probably choose being 6/10 over 9/10 lol. 

Edited yesterday at 12:48 PM by Valach

[CARDOZZO]

Run from stage orange influencer 8/9/10 kind of woman. 

Find a cute woman who is average on looks but interesting, creative, intellectual.

[CARDOZZO]

Find a woman at your level and grow together as a couple. 

Looks is not everything. Sex is not everything. 

[Zenterus]

19 hours ago, Valach said:

 

You don't really care that much that your job is 7/10, your health or your friends are 7/10, why does the woman have to be 10/10? It often is because we project our own self worth onto her.

Uh, I actually do care that my friends are top tier as well. I don't hang around men I don't deeply respect on some regard.

 

And yeah, my experience dating top tier women has also been that they suck at being in a relationship. They expect the world but suck at reciprocating. But in my experience, that can be "trained" in them. These women are not used to being told no or being put in their place, so when you do that as a man, it hits them 10x harder and will fight to keep you as you're such a rarity to them

[Zenterus]

6 hours ago, CARDOZZO said:

Run from stage orange influencer 8/9/10 kind of woman. 

Find a cute woman who is average on looks but interesting, creative, intellectual.

Nah. Not yet. Im still young. I will try to find an all around 10 first. If that doesnt work out then I'll see about your advice.

[Valach]

2 hours ago, Zenterus said:

Uh, I actually do care that my friends are top tier as well. I don't hang around men I don't deeply respect on some regard.

 

And yeah, my experience dating top tier women has also been that they suck at being in a relationship. They expect the world but suck at reciprocating. But in my experience, that can be "trained" in them. These women are not used to being told no or being put in their place, so when you do that as a man, it hits them 10x harder and will fight to keep you as you're such a rarity to them

I didn't want to talk to you specifically. Just wanted to paint the general picture of pickup community, where I see that we are all wanting this 10/10, yet we don't give a shit if our other life is 7/10. And I think that's a good thing (having non-perfect life). I feel like if we can't learn to be happy with a woman who is 7/10 or 8/10 looks wise, we have an issue on our hands. And I am struggling with the same thing! 

[CARDOZZO]

4 hours ago, Zenterus said:

Nah. Not yet. Im still young. I will try to find an all around 10 first. If that doesnt work out then I'll see about your advice.

Why? Chasing a 10 is conformity. Screen for woman that are mature, interesting, alive, funny, bookish - especially if you want to marry her.

#1 Golden Rule: Don't date her if you don't see her as the mother of your children.

[Zenterus]

4 hours ago, CARDOZZO said:

Why? Chasing a 10 is conformity. Screen for woman that are mature, interesting, alive, funny, bookish - especially if you want to marry her.

#1 Golden Rule: Don't date her if you don't see her as the mother of your children.

Non conformity is also conformity. The only way out is to do what one wants to do just cause one wants to.

I do agree with the goldeb rule you shared though.

[Valach]

5 minutes ago, Zenterus said:

Non conformity is also conformity. The only way out is to do what one wants to do just cause one wants to.

I do agree with the goldeb rule you shared though.

The tricky part is also being aware of why the one wants the things he/she wants. 

[Miguel1]

On 27/03/2026 at 11:40 AM, Zenterus said:

I have decided to pursue the highest quality of women that I can in order to settle down with one and live happily ever after. These women are glamorous, have good jobs, very pretty, are posted on instagram with Louis Vuiton bags and Gucci and Versace.

Here lies our biggest difference. Perhaps, going after these girls is the root reason for your insecurity, causing corruption in you. Or perhaps, your insecurity caused you to go after these girls. Usually they go hand in habd.

These girls you are describing are used to being showered with lots of gifts and money. It’s hard to win that game unless you are very rich.

Anyway, I’d pick a ”useful 8” with relatively developed character over Instagram girls, anytime of the year.

An eight is much more likely to have character way more developed than an Instagram girl.

Edited 12 minutes ago by Miguel1

[Miguel1]

@CARDOZZO is speaking pure, hard facts.

Tens are totally not worth the trouble and the maintaining.

Looks are not everything. Pick an 8, they are WAY more likely to have other things needed for a healthy relationship than a 10.

[Miguel1]

@Zenterus You remind me of my younger self. I kept trying to find a perfect 10 to be my girlfriend. It was a nightmare compared to an 8.

 

[Joseph Maynor]

No normal women would respond to this.