Treat every challenge like a growth experience

[Spiritual Warrior]

I was at my best friends birthday party yesterday and my ex girlfriend was there with her new boyfriend. She was snuggled up with him all day. At first, I am thinking "why does she have to be here? This is MY best friend." "Why can't she at least control herself, doesn't she know I'd rather not see that?"

But then it dawned on me that all this is is an "emotional regulation challenge" in which i have to find a way to "feel and let go" of the current emotional state. Situations like this are not going away any time soon, the only thing that you can do is train your emotional regulatory system to handle and deal with this. Avoidance is never the answer. 

I will also say that he does seem like a genuinely good guy. I am very happy that she found someone that is treating her well, I know the guy before me really sucked. 

The reality is that the ex girlfriend, for whatever reason, acted the way that she did. I cannot change someone else's behavior, all that I have control over is how I handle it. And again, I want the challenge, I will have to face even greater challenges in the near future if I am going to reach my goals. 

I will go so far as to say I am thankful for this challenge yesterday. 

Treat every challenge like a growth experience.

Edited yesterday at 02:28 PM by Spiritual Warrior

[Hojo]

Yes the simulation will try to fuck with you. When I broke up with my gf I would always see her around right after. We broke up a lot of times at the end and every single time i would be roaming the street and she would be there. Like reality is trolling you, cause it is.

I lived like out of town and I was walking down a road that was out of town kind and I saw her walking with a man and im like WTF is this person even doing here. Now I know I was being trolled by God. I just ignored them and then she message me later saying why didnt you wave for an extra troll on top. The simulation knows your heartstrings and will pull on them to get a reaction.

Im so non reactive to situations that it kept happening. The simulation/dream needs to break you thats why you created it.

Its like if something bugs you, you dream about it, works the same way for IRL.

Edited 8 hours ago by Hojo

[theleelajoker]

I sometimes feel the same - as if life creates situations to test me  

No matter what it really is - the way you contextualized it seems super helpful and constructive to me. "Emotional regulation challenge" and "feel and let go".  

All the rest is just a story.  

Crazy how much more control I experience in my life by simply letting to of control.

Experience it. Stop creating stories or expectations. Feel it. Move on. Repeat.

The funny thing of course is also that the "life of testing me" is also a story. What's happening is simply "A situation occurs. This situation causes an reaction that I can observe within the framework of my body"

 

Edited 6 hours ago by theleelajoker