Constants conflicting thoughts, unable to enjoy the journey

[ZeldaStar]

I've recently started the life purpose course. I'm making progress, watching videos, learning the content... Yet at the same time, my mind keeps running across these conflicting thoughts. 

Cognitively, I feel like I have a very clear plan and a path forward right now. I'm planning to work in my current job for a few year, save up some money, start a family. On the side, I would like to explore and start working towards my life purpose, and then eventually make the switch full-time after I've saved up some money and am sure about my life purpose.  

However, I can't quite get my emotional side and my energy levels to align with this direction I've set for myself. 

For example, I'll watch Leo's life purpose course, and he'll say something like "you must quit your job", and then my brain will just keep contemplating the idea of quitting now, even though I know it's not the best move for me.

Also, very strangely, I started enjoying my job less. I use to love doing the work, I use to love working hard and getting people's approval. That's how I got into my current job. Now these things don't drive me anymore, but I can't seem to get my new, more authentic direction to motivate me in the same way I used to through external validation. 

I keep spending my free time looking for advice and other perspectives, which just leads to more thinking and less doing... 

One explanation I had - like mentioned in book Mastery, I feel like I am used to pursuing the "constant climax" of life, and now that I am on a big plateau, I am struggling to continue doing the work. Making a sudden jump right now seems like I'd be more a dabbler, and jump to something else, before having fully understood my purpose, and fulfilled some of my karma.       

What are some things I could do to get my mind in a better alignment and motivation towards my goals?  

[LordFall]

Bro I think the life purpose course is gonna change your life

You didn't elaborate much on this part but it leaves me very concerned for your mindset :

Cognitively, I feel like I have a very clear plan and a path forward right now. I'm planning to work in my current job for a few year, save up some money, start a family. On the side, I would like to explore and start working towards my life purpose, and then eventually make the switch full-time after I've saved up some money and am sure about my life purpose.  

So really you have no plan and just hope it works out? That's what it reads to me. I don't know what industry you're in but surely you know that there is a huge wave of automation layoffs coming to all industries in the next 5 years? And I don't know how well versed you are in macroeconomics, finance and cryptocurrency but tl;dr the value of most fiat currencies is has been going to shit and is predicted to keep massively doing so over the next 10 years meaning the average job will pay less yearly?

I'm very glad you lost motivation for your random job by just hearing about the possibility of a life purpose type orientation for your career. Obviously don't quit your job right away but not starting a business or at least a specialized career in this day and age is financial suicide. 

[ZeldaStar]

> so over the next 10 years meaning the average job will pay less yearly

Sure, but my situation is different.

I work in software engineering 

Without disclosing exact TC numbers, if I stay at my job, and I am able to work and be consistent, putting in roughly the same motivation I used for the past ~8 years that I was working,  I should be comfortably financially independent in 10 years. I'll also have a good WLB in the process to get there too, which I haven't had much of before.  

I also have investments, so jobs paying less at some point in the future is not much of a concern for me. 

I work in a startup and on good terms with the CEO, so not particularly concerned about layoffs as long as I stay in this job. 

 

My problem is mroe about dealing with my mind, and dealing with this desire to have a higher impact,  than it is about dealing with the money problems. 

Edited Monday at 08:36 PM by ZeldaStar

[ZeldaStar]

> So really you have no plan and just hope it works out? 

Financially I'd say my plan is pretty clear and robust. 

In terms of life purpose, I find David Guetta's idea of purpose more appealing - which is that purpose unfolds in layers. 

I'd love to figure out my purpose now, and I hope once I finish this course, I'll have a good idea of it. But I don't want it to interfere with my current motivation and my plans either. 

I believe my life purpose would be highly focused on impact and helping people, and by the nature of things, most money is just located in big firms and businesses, not in helping people. 

[ryoko]

Life Purpose is quite disruptive, as it should. It's all about you. 

If you're already well off socially, it probably is going to backfire a lot and take a lot of unlearning of social values/norms you've inherited. 

Expect first few years of starting your LP to be hell. And there'll be some beginner's luck here and there, but don't count on it. 

[ryoko]

I've learnt this over time. Not everyone should do it. It takes a different level of intelligence to not go near it. Common folks avoid these things instinctively, wondered why... I used to think it's because they're stupid, but recently I've come to accept it's because they're intelligent enough to not disrupt their survival. 

Life Purpose course have it's flaws, it's made many years ago, by now Leo would also have noticed the many ways it can be destructive. 

One thing I found is how it positions money. It's almost in denial of broader society. One can take Life Purpose to the very extreme, especially if they're young and build stuff which is totally incompatible with the society, which is quite beautiful. "My life purpose is to do nothing, be nothing - self destruction"

[ryoko]

5 hours ago, ZeldaStar said:

I don't want it to interfere with my current motivation and my plans either. 

That's not gonna happen. It will interfere to the point you have to drop one, if you do this seriously. 

[ted73104]

What about gaining financial independence in 10 years first? Then pursue your dreams later, you should still be young then.

[Hojo]

I would suggest listening to bashars videos. If you have a conflicting thought the conflict is the brain telling you the belief is not part of your belief system of who you really. So listen to the conflicting thought and resolve the issue. Remember you are God you can believe anything you want.

The good with Bashar is he gives you step by step thought patterns that your brain will accept as logical. Write down the thought patterns to follow and your brain will listen.

Most people just give grandiose ideas about what to do, but bashar says think this then think this then think this.

Basically manipulate your beleif system to get your brain to shut up.

Edited Tuesday at 05:07 PM by Hojo