ted73104

Member
  • Content count

    152
  • Joined

  • Last visited

About ted73104

  • Rank
    - - -

Personal Information

  • Location
    Taiwan
  • Gender
    Male
  1. It was also a part of the process for me, but I felt this way mainly because I had to overthrow lots of my previous beliefs in this process. After I was able to get out of my previous religion, both the doctrines and the group of people as well, I felt a lot more free but also very drained because I felt that all my past efforts amounted to almost nothing. And I didn't want to do anything.
  2. Life being pointless is bad news, but also good news at the same time. This means you can define what you want to be however you want. As an individual, it is easy to think our surroundings don't matter to us, but God from his God level infinite love feels that you matter to the world!!
  3. @Gianna Lots of good questions for contemplation listed out here. The main reason we can't be authentic is because we're totally afraid of rejection. What we don't know is that rejection is a part of acceptance, just like failure is a part of success. You could never succeed unless you failed that many times in the first place. I think we introverts tend to dream big, what we really want is sometimes very hard to achieve in reality. And sometimes we don't understand how hard it is to become like that extroverted guy who is so comfortable in the crowd (for example). When we try to perform something that is way above the level we're at, there is this trap that we look dumb and stupid if don't act as cool as the guys who can perform those things at a high level. This gets us stuck in this wanting to become something in a short time and then resist trying for fear of acting awkward cycle. The interesting thing is that the part of you that is afraid of being itself thinks that other people will reject you when you act authentically. But the truth is actually that other people will accept you a lot more than you think if you're able to be authentic, even if you're really awkward. The real person who has rejected you is just yourself, because you can't accept the way how other people accept you under the current condition. The criteria you want to meet takes time to implement, especially when it is something on a high level. So basically we need to identify what we really want and find an effective way to implement those things patiently. But even more importantly, we need to gradually realize that you don't need to meet those criterias to be happy. Even if you could gain those abilities or be very popular, you still wouldn't be satisfied under your current mindset, you'd just crave for something else afterwards. You don't need any reason to be authentically happy.
  4. Agree, need to spend more time actualizing outside.
  5. Thanks to everyone who replied. I think one of the big obstacles to overcoming depression, is that there is always this criteria you need to overcome or fulfill in order for you to accept yourself, something you desperately want. But the hard truth is to realize that it's not worth it feeling bad about yourself if you don't meet that demand. Life has many aspects to discover and enjoy, you don't have to be depressed because you will probably never get that one thing.
  6. Let me know what you guys think, but the root cause of depression is that you fundamentally are critical or disapprove of yourself from a emotional standpoint. You overall have a negative opinion of yourself deep inside you. Now this may seem to be obvious, but your emotional opinion of yourself is actually really subtle. Meaning that it is likely that you don't realize how much you dislike yourself, or how much you judge yourself negatively. And therefore the cure to depression is to find a way to like yourself, have a real positive opinion of yourself. You get into an emotional state where you think I'm good, I like where I am, and I'm happy with what I got. From our upbringing, there are tons of criterias that we picked up growing up that we use to judge ourselves whether we are "worthy". Normally our ego will function as a shield to fend off those negative criticisms, but when the case happens where we discover that we're in a situation where we don't like ourselves fundamentally, the ego becomes hurt and turns around to criticize ourselves. If we stay in this emotional state for a long time, then the depressed emotion becomes sort of permanent. Emotions I think have inertia, meaning that if you're used to feeling some way most of the time, those emotions will likely occur naturally in your feelings. We get depression when we have a negative emotion about ourselves for a long time. The solution is to generate positive emotions about ourselves internally, I don't think you need as much positive emotions as much as the previous negative emotions, but the ability to generate enough positive emotions would suffice. But generating positive emotions about ourselves sometimes is pretty hard. The goal is to live up to your expectations, but the real method is probably to lower your expectations and criterias to be happy with yourself. I'm still struggling with depression too, but this is what I've found.
  7. If you want to get rid of social anxiety, you need to ground yourself in your own ego. You need to find a way to get real comfortable in your ego, sort of the opposite of getting enlightened and becoming selfless.
  8. What we need is control over emotions, about this part we can train in your everyday life. Identify when you feel insecure in your daily life when you contemplate and then deconstruct. If you want to go to a club and do pickup, it's more about embracing your dark side and tuning into the wild atmosphere. I've never been to Vegas, but from my own experience, not every girl wants sex in a club. Some girls just like to hang out with friends there, some girls just like to drink. If you try the hookup point thing with her, she'll see you for a player and just push you away. And I can tell you, there are some girls who love to drink alcohol who are strangely also highly conscious. If you're a player, you'll never be friends with her. So you gotta have these things in mind before you show yourself to be an asshole. There's only a limited amount of girls you can get in a club, and most of them are just sluts. You can have fun with them, but you'll probably eventually find them to be low conscious and not suitable for intimate/long term relationships. If you want emotional mastery, you still have to work towards higher self values.
  9. Sadly in the end, it doesn't really matter which party is trying to help the poor. Not sure if anyone linked this video before, but ultimately it is up to the people to support and help folks who are in need.
  10. If the Biden administration just removed the mask mandate, the lockdowns, and the social distancing, his supporters would blame afterwards when covid cases rise again. He doesn't really have a choice, it's also a matter of survival here.
  11. Not much anyone can do. Who people vote for has much to do with their world view, and that can't be changed easily. We can't even change our own views in a short time. It's really a survival instinct. Probably only after disaster strikes will people wake up.
  12. Man, this is a huge riddle you have here for us. I can only guess what's going on in your psyche right now, assuming what you wrote was serious. However it would seem like your last sentence provides a hint on your situation. You seem to genuinely hate yourself, and under this set of deep emotions, you don't want to care about anything or anyone else. Your "environment" is judgemental of yourself for a number of reasons (very interested in knowing what those reasons are). You think you are unworthy of relationship with others, which is why you reject your friends, because you think potentially you would destroy your relationship with your friends in some way or if something happened. You reject your friends, your family, and the people around you because you don't want to hurt them and yourself. You believe there are criterias you need to have in order to be worthy of love from the people around you, however you feel that you're totally not capable of fulfilling those criterias. This brings a deep feeling of shame, which gives you this very cold vibe. This vibe is so strong, it could also freeze those who look into your eyes. Your perception of your self identity is holding you back. Your strong love for those around you is manifested in the form of a deep hatred. You feel you don't care, but actually this emotion of not caring proves how much you want to care. You want to love and be loved, but your situation doesn't allow you to give or receive love. So instead your love has turned into hatred, which is a kind of extreme self-love. You feel agony because you're in a tough bind, internal conflicts are occuring within you. I think we need to know what the judgements you've given yourself are in order to really be able to help you.
  13. @Someone here The origin of suffering according to Buddhist theory is perseverance, the fixation on having/getting something, the clinging onto that notion. To overcome suffering is to identify that you are clinging onto these things and then find some way to drop them. However this is not an option for most humans, we're not capable of changing our nature and so we have to play the game.
  14. Cool man! So what should we do with our self image? How do we expand it in general so we can embrace more diversities in life (including the outcomes we dislike)?
  15. Great to have you back, where did you take this photo by the way?