Females DO NOT Have More Options For Sexual Preferences

[Terell Kirby]

On 5/2/2025 at 6:42 PM, Princess Arabia said:

All it takes for most men to WANT to have sex with a woman is her appearance.

Out of curiosity, What was your process for coming to this conclusion?

On 5/2/2025 at 6:42 PM, Princess Arabia said:

A woman can have sex with someone she's not physically attracted to just like men, but a man will do it purely for physical reasons while a woman, in this case, it would be circumstantial. 

Seems like you are putting on a pedestal women's process of sexual selection over the men's process. Circumstantial and physical attractiveness can be factors for both genders -- not everything reduces to gender differences.

What you have is women who are horrible at choosing sexual partners, just as there are men who are horrible at it as well. Both can be self deceived in unique and distinct ways.

Edited May 6 by Terell Kirby

[Princess Arabia]

7 minutes ago, Terell Kirby said:

Out of curiosity, What was your process for coming to this conclusion?

I'm not speaking about after a man gets to know a woman, relationship or marriage, I'm speaking about instantly or soon thereafter. I didn't think I had to explain this given how it's quite obvious everywhere you look. Nothing I say is a conclusion I've deducted, just pov's, perspectives and opinions......until they change. Notice I said most. All i will say is, strip clubs and escort work doesn't exist because of the women's personalities and the lingo from men constantly referring to women's appearances (where to meet hot chicks, where all the hot chicks at, she was hot, etcetc). C'mon guys don't care to get to know you first before they've concluded they would fuck you or not..,wait, that chick is hot but I'd have to get to know her first before I can know if I'd bang her or not. I'm not saying they would , but all that other stuff comes later after seeing her appearance. 

[Princess Arabia]

19 minutes ago, Terell Kirby said:

Out of curiosity, What was your process for coming to this conclusion?

Seems like you are putting on a pedestal women's process of sexual selection over the men's process. Circumstantial and physical attractiveness can be factors for both genders -- not everything reduces to gender differences.

What you have is women who are horrible at choosing sexual partners, just as there are men who are horrible at it as well. Both can be self deceived in unique and distinct ways.

I understand what you're saying and its hard to get all factors in in short comments and in a forum-type atmosphere. Lots of exceptions in every situation. However, on a general scale, I don't think a woman would freely and lovingly have sex with a man she didn't want to just to have an orgasm. Purely just to come. Men do this all the time and speak about it all the time as in "I just wanted to nut", or "I didn't really like her but she was giving it up", or she came on to me, etcetc. This doesn't happen in wonen's cases where we just have sex because he was giving it up, they don't like the guy but they just wanted to cum..please, let's get real here. Lots of businesses situations and circumstances are there because of men's roaming eyes and abilities to separate lust from love and are sexually turned on by a woman's appearance alone. 

Your last statement has nothing to do with what I was referring to.

I don't have to put women's process of sexual preference on a pedestal over men's. It's usually different and that's just it. It's the guys that thinks I'm saying one is better or higher than another. There is a compliment there and the differences work in sync with the overall picture of the female/male dynamic.  

[Terell Kirby]

22 minutes ago, Princess Arabia said:

C'mon guys don't care to get to know you first before they've concluded they would fuck you or not..,

Hmm .. but how can you be so certain? That’s my main question.

Unless you surveyed/experienced every man in existence, this could possibly be a generalization on your part.

Edited May 6 by Terell Kirby

[Princess Arabia]

36 minutes ago, Terell Kirby said:

Seems like you are putting on a pedestal women's process of sexual selection over the men's process. Circumstantial and physical attractiveness can be factors for both genders -- not everything reduces to gender differences.

It happens, but how many men are our screwing women they're not attracted to for job opportunities, because they want to land that acting role, they need their rent paid, only screwing her for the sake of the peace (he's abusive), plenty of women out their having circumstantial sex. Men too but most is just for the sake of sex with.,...and not because they are in a certain predicament.

[Princess Arabia]

8 minutes ago, Terell Kirby said:

Hmm .. but how can you be so certain? That’s my main question.

Unless you surveyed/experienced every man in existence, this could possibly be a generalization on your part.

This is the most obvious thing on the planet. You must be misunderstanding me. Of course it's not 100% of men because it's never 100% but how many guys do you think are out there NEEDING to know a woman first before he gets sexually attracted to her. Thatls all I'm saying in this regard here, nothing else in that statement. Men know instantly or soon thereafter meeting a woman that they are sexually attracted and would fuck her if given the opportunity. I'm not saying every guy would definitely do it, all I'm saying is they know if they're sexually attracted right away or not.

Edited May 6 by Princess Arabia

[Terell Kirby]

1 minute ago, Princess Arabia said:

Men know instantly or soon thereafter meeting a woman that they are sexually attracted and would fuck her if given the opportunity. I'm not saying every guy would definitely do it, all I'm saying is the know if they're sexually attracted right away. 

You seem to be saying two opposed things. One sentence you make absolutist statement about what men value, then say not all of them value it. I’m skeptical of your position on this because your statements seem to come from a place of taking absolutist positions on what men value as important when selecting sexual mates- this discredits men who have high standards that go beyond just physical attractiveness and wanting to use women for sex and nothing else.

My question now is- what holds you from questioning your assumptions and generalizations about men on this topic?

 

[Princess Arabia]

It doesn't take a relationship expert to have to tell you that most men are attracted to looks and a woman's appearance more than her personality in the beginning. So much so that there are million and billion dollar companies profiting from this. Ever seen a shirtless man advertising a car, how many topless strip clubs are there that are strictly male dancers. Why aren't men getting cat-called left and right by women and these cat-callers aren't calling for their exam results.

[Princess Arabia]

3 minutes ago, Terell Kirby said:

you make absolutist statement

 you keep insisting that I'm referring to ALL men because I try to insert the word "most" or some"' and that these statements are just my opinions and pov's. I'm not making any absolutist statements, they are my opinions and my opinions only based of what I've seen to be true and they are circumstantial and compared to other scenarios, e.g. It is mostly women we see in commercialized situations advertising cars or anything trying to sell sex. So that's one reason you can say men are visual. Another is the strip clubs, men are visual. All I'm saying is men know f they're attracted to you or not in an instant and that looks is all that's needed for that in a man. 

[Terell Kirby]

10 minutes ago, Princess Arabia said:

I’m not making any absolutist statements, they are my opinions and my opinions only based of what I've seen to be true

1. We can take our opinions as absolute. Stating something as opinion does not absolve it from being take as superior to other perspectives, opinions and worldviews.

2. You base what is true off of media/advertisement- but how many personal conversations (deep conversations) have you had with men on sexuality and what they value? What about the diversity of men from different cultures, backgrounds, etc?

Not saying you haven’t done this, but stressing the importance of what is necessary to come up with a truth claim of any kind.

Edited May 6 by Terell Kirby

[Princess Arabia]

26 minutes ago, Terell Kirby said:

You seem to be saying two opposed things. One sentence you make absolutist statement about what men value, then say not all of them value it. I’m skeptical of your position on this because your statements seem to come from a place of taking absolutist positions on what men value as important when selecting sexual mates- this discredits men who have high standards that go beyond just physical attractiveness and wanting to use women for sex and nothing else.

Yeah, looks, bottomline. You said sexual mates not marriage or a friend and confidante. I won't butter this up and pretend to patronize men, they go for looks initially when it comes down to a sexual mate. I mentioned nothing about using women for sex, you assumed that's my implications. Men value looks and it's at the high end of the spectrum. That's the bottom line and some men refuse to want to accept that because they think it makes them seem shallow. I did not say they don't value anything else but how the woman looks is very valuable to them yes it is. You might not know this because you live under a rock, but this forum alone reveals this amongst every other scenarios out there. A MAN INSN'T SELECTING SEXUAL MATES BASED ON IQ LEVELS. or even based on her finances most of the time or who her parents are or her standards or if she's a good girl or not he's basing it off of what she looks like at first and everything else is secondary and sometimes not, but if it's now about relationships or marriage. Then he might look a little deeper, but just for a sexual mate no no, nothing matters other than physical appearance. 

Edited May 6 by Princess Arabia

[Princess Arabia]

 

16 minutes ago, Terell Kirby said:

1. We can take our opinions as absolute. Stating something as opinion does not absolve it from being take as superior to other perspectives, opinions and worldviews.

2. You base what is true off of media/advertisement- but how many personal conversations (deep conversations) have you had with men on sexuality and what they value? What about the diversity of men from different cultures, backgrounds, etc?

Not saying you haven’t done this, but stressing the importance of what is necessary to come up with a truth claim of any kind.

You are being general with your "how do you know this to be true" narrative. It's not about media, but what is the case. Marketing caters to peoples emotions. I don't have to do a general survey to understand that men are visual creatures and they base their attraction level towards a woman based on her looks. To answer you or other question yes, I've been in conversations with many men and situations of this nature because I've been an exotic dancer and an escort for the male species for many years and interacted with them. That said, I've also seen it in general cases, up the street, down town and between. Men are not asking about a woman's personality as much as they're asking what does she look like. 

Edited May 6 by Princess Arabia

[Terell Kirby]

4 minutes ago, Princess Arabia said:

To answer you or other question yes, I've been in conversations with many men and situations of this nature because I've been an exotic dancer and an escort for the male species for many years and interacted with them. 

Thanks for sharing that- takes courage and vulnerability, also helps me understand your experience with men and their sexual taste.

Only thing I would ask is that working in these environments, can it skew one's perspective on men? It is a limited sample size. Also what is behind referring the term "male species?" seems to dehumanize men.

I don't care to be right or to debate/make a point. This kind of dialogue helps broaden my perspective.

[Princess Arabia]

A woman's looks is worth more than what's in her head and she didn't make the rules up on that. Infact, a smart, intellectual, very outspoken and filled with knowledge about a lot of things is not valued as much sexually in a woman and is sometimes looked at as masculine and if she's too outspoken - bossy. Looks for a woman is a very valuable commodity. I didn't make the rules for this, society did. Put a fat ugly woman on the front of a magazine cover or as a role model for beauty or invite a bunch of fat ugly women with no sex appeal on a yatch party and see how well that works out. A bunch of fat bald ugly old men who are rich will certainly work wonders for this scenario though. Don't try to tell me men don't value looks, it's their top priority. Look good, and you can attract, even if you're dumb, in fact it's best if you are.

[Princess Arabia]

5 minutes ago, Terell Kirby said:

Only thing I would ask is that working in these environments, can it skew one's perspective on men? It is a limited sample size. Also what is behind referring the term "male species?" seems to dehumanize men.

This is why I don't use this as a prime example when speaking on these matters and it has nothing to do with the topic. My experiences were not one of being on the streets or too impersonal. These would be situations where interactions were just normal interactions just like everyone else. Don't judge what you're unaware of just from what ilve told you because my interactions with men outside of my line of work was way more traumatizing or negative than with the men in my line of work. So my work doesn't have much influence on any negativity towards men that I may have if any. 

[Princess Arabia]

13 minutes ago, Terell Kirby said:

I don't care to be right or to debate/make a point. This kind of dialogue helps broaden my perspective.

No, and I understand that. You have been very respectful in your communications with me and have shown that you are open about our conversation and what I have to say,. Just understand I'm not claiming anything to be the Absolute case, and can only speak from my perspective. It's just that it gets to be a drag if one has to keep repeating that point over again, that they are only speaking from a particular perspectival view point.

[Emerald]

3 hours ago, Princess Arabia said:

What I think is happening is, on paper, guys are expressing their disappointments in not being able to date or have the girl of their dreams and it's because those fantasy women are dating the top 20%. They have come to the brutal truth of the matter, maybe from watching a lot of porn, TV or fantasies, that those beautiful women that they dream and fantasize about are out of reach and maybe any woman that may even come close to that or even close to what I consider to be my dream girl they can't have.

I honestly think this is the case, because I see regular people, like you said, on a daily bases coupled up and having normal couples and relationship issues, not who's lonely or how women are this and that or being stuck in their heads about the loneliness epidemic or how women only date the top. I think they're after a certain type and realizing that type isn't interested in them. The physical look, not the personality but what she looks like. 

I think this is a big part of it. Of course, the most attractive women will naturally be attracted to the most attractive men because they are their match... and statistically couples are typically of equivalent levels of attractiveness across many dimensions.

Beyond that, my thought is that the type of men who would tend to believe this narrative are men who lack relationship experience and only fantasize about wanting the top 20% of physically attractive women. And that's mostly because they haven't had a real relationship or real feelings for a woman beyond just being turned on by the most objective components of a woman's appearance.

And so, from their perspective, it's all about wanting to seek validation through having sex with ideal-looking women. And it's observable statistically and otherwise that many men seek to do this... which is evident on this forum.

And so, they would tend to project their own objectifying tendencies to want to most attractive women onto women as a whole group, believing that women only want the most attractive men... and that women are similarly objectifying men and deeming them as 'male refuse' if they are average or below in the same way they might judge women who they don't consider to be attractive.

But it's really just a reflection of how they see women who are of equivalent attractiveness to themselves. So, they believe women are doing that to them.

It's really just the cycle of projecting one's own qualities onto a scapegoat and then going into victim's mentality about it because "The scapegoat is brazenly objectifying men and devaluing less attractive men! Gasp!"

[ExploringReality]

@Emerald and men who are addicted to porn.

Edited May 6 by ExploringReality

[Princess Arabia]

8 minutes ago, ExploringReality said:

@Princess Arabia coming from someone who got warning points for being racist 😂 just twisting your panties.

Not sure I follow. What comment are you referring to. I did take note it's meant in humor but I'm not following what the comment is relating to.

Edited May 6 by Princess Arabia

[ExploringReality]

@Emerald that's a clarifying way to put it.

Edited May 6 by ExploringReality