Schizophonia’s Journal

[Schizophonia]

9 minutes ago, RawJudah said:

@Schizophonia maybe not overanalyse everything dude. 

It’s what i like to do.

[Schizophonia]

Day 42

I saw a good friend today; we spent 2 hours talking, chilling smoking cigarettes and drinking coke.
I'm an introvert but it's always cool to socialize, do stuff like that.

I should have more nights out remaking the world while smoking and drinking alcohol lol.

[Schizophonia]

3 hours ago, Moon said:

Yes honestly I’ve recently done a lot of work shedding my attachment to my past experiences that’s been hindering me, that’s why it resonated 😅

You ruminate ? 

I spent my life doing this to maintain my character, because somewhere I had the belief that being more peaceful made me less effective in obtaining energy (and therefore surviving) than scaring others, impressing them with my self-denial in the face of pain or this kind of delusions lol.

But the growing evidence is that I wanted a pleasant life, not a neurotic one, and so this persona naturally ended up dissolving.

3 hours ago, Moon said:

The music thing imo if it feels like a lower pleasure addiction then it’s better to have time off if it’s a distraction. But personally now I use it as a tool of expression to dance and sing

Ahah, what do you dance/sing to?

3 hours ago, Moon said:

which brings me higher joy not from a place of attachment. Everyone has different journeys and interests so do what resonates 🤷‍♀️

Yes it enriches my brain fog which I prefer to avoid.

[Schizophonia]

Day 43

I want to have several children, preferably quite early.
What interests me in my relationships with my children is that they respect my law (have at least decent grades, tidy their room, do household chores, contribute to the bills once they are old enough to work, be polite...) willingly or not in exchange for having a roof over their heads, food, and present parenting; I think it's very cool and important to do activities with your children, and help them in their progress.
Then what they can do outside, especially if it's a man, is not my problem.

I believe it is important that children are framed; For everyone's comfort and because if they are not framed it is tacitly giving them an importance (and a weight of importance) that they do not have and it is quite consensual that it is an ideal configuration for mental illnesses.

[Sugarcoat]

5 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

Day 43

I want to have several children, preferably quite early.
What interests me in my relationships with my children is that they respect my law (have at least decent grades, tidy their room, do household chores, contribute to the bills once they are old enough to work, be polite...) willingly or not in exchange for having a roof over their heads, food, and present parenting; I think it's very cool and important to do activities with your children, and help them in their progress.
Then what they can do outside, especially if it's a man, is not my problem.

I believe it is important that children are framed; For everyone's comfort and because if they are not framed it is tacitly giving them an importance (and a weight of importance) that they do not have and it is quite consensual that it is an ideal configuration for mental illnesses.

Admit you just wanna spread your chad genes, wanna make sure your lineage survives

 

Jokes aside I have a thing against parents who make their children contribute to paying the bill

 

[Schizophonia]

37 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

Admit you just wanna spread your chad genes, wanna make sure your lineage survives

Lol.

No it's not a question of genes, but of taking care of one's family.😉

37 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

Jokes aside I have a thing against parents who make their children contribute to paying the bill

Why ? 

Well I would never put my children or people I love outside, obviously, but I consider it normal for my children to participate if they earn money and live with me.

Children also enjoy giving to their parents.

[Schizophonia]

1 hour ago, Moon said:

In the past yes but more recently it was holding onto belief systems (energetic blocks) from the past that no longer served me. For example, being the character with childhood family issues. Tried to kill off this old version as much as possible basically 😂 so I don’t identify with that person anymore. 

What were these family issues? If it's not too personal.

 

1 hour ago, Moon said:

Interesting because the more in tune you are with source, energy is abundant and can be channelled - for your physical vitality, creatively and so on.

Yet another spiritual paradigm/egregor 😅

1 hour ago, Moon said:

Good work 🙌

Thanks.

1 hour ago, Moon said:

Whatever is in my recent liked songs- different genres, some oldies some new😅

Dw i whippin a lot too eheh. 

1 hour ago, Moon said:

Usually to start the day off in good spirits or during the day for fun/being in a higher vibration.

I looked up the first two out of curiosity on youtube and it's kind of rap/pop; It's cool, I like it. I didn't know any of the singers except "Drake" by name. 

1 hour ago, Moon said:

Fair enough, my vice used to be social media in the past, but now not so much 😄

Me too if we forget the almost 6000 posts on actualize. 😂

Which ones, Instagram? Twitter?

[Sugarcoat]

13 hours ago, Schizophonia said:

Lol.

No it's not a question of genes, but of taking care of one's family.😉

Basically you’re normal

13 hours ago, Schizophonia said:

Why ? 

Well I would never put my children or people I love outside, obviously, but I consider it normal for my children to participate if they earn money and live with me.

Children also enjoy giving to their parents.

I like for my children to save a lot of money so they can eventually move out. Depends on the salary too like sometimes it’s low and minimum wage then i wouldn’t take money but if it’s a good salary then maybe yes 

[Schizophonia]

56 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

Basically you’re normal

Yes

56 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

I like for my children to save a lot of money so they can eventually move out. Depends on the salary too like sometimes it’s low and minimum wage then i wouldn’t take money but if it’s a good salary then maybe yes 

I'll see, it's in several decades eheh.

 

[Sugarcoat]

15 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

several decades

When do you wanna have kids?

[Schizophonia]

20 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

When do you wanna have kids?

Starting around 25/30 years old.
And you?

 

If my child starts working at 20, that means that this question will not be asked until at least in 24 years old.

Edited March 9, 2025 by Schizophonia

[Sugarcoat]

5 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

Starting around 25/30 years old.
And you?.

damn 25 is soon

5 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

 

If my child starts working at 20, that means that this question will not be asked until at least in 24 years old.

Yea it’s nothing to think much about now

[Schizophonia]

1 minute ago, Sugarcoat said:

damn 25 is soon

Rather 30.
There too we will see

[Sugarcoat]

31 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

Rather 30.
There too we will see

Ok I see

[Schizophonia]

Day 44

I'm back from the restaurant(not planned), no post for today.

Edited March 9, 2025 by Schizophonia

[RendHeaven]

On 3/7/2025 at 7:43 AM, Schizophonia said:

turbo estrogenic

you're the best

[The Crocodile]

2 hours ago, RendHeaven said:

you're the best

Quiet SpendHell

I got a nice 3-day ban for that. I would've thought this thread would be a no-mod zone, the Schizophonia Journal Autonomous Zone: SJAZ.

[Schizophonia]

1 hour ago, The Crocodile said:

Quiet SpendHell

I got a nice 3-day ban for that.

 

1 hour ago, The Crocodile said:

I would've thought this thread would be a no-mod zone, the Schizophonia Journal Autonomous Zone: SJAZ.

You can interact with me as much as you want as long as you are polite, don't spam me etc.

[The Crocodile]

20 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

 

You can interact with me as much as you want as long as you are polite, don't spam me etc.

No, I meant this journal could be a libertarian experiment where mods are not allowed.

[Schizophonia]

11 hours ago, Moon said:

One issue was hatred and rage received from a parental figure growing up.

I'm sorry for you, hope your relation got better.

11 hours ago, Moon said:

Releasing what felt like one of the final attachments I had to this story, allowed further for love to come to me in this present moment. 

Well you can spend your life hanging on to some stupid karma, and it will always form your personality to some extent; But at some point you still want to be fulfilled; Enriching activities, a good mood, friends, a companion who pampers you etc. 🙂

11 hours ago, Moon said:

Fair enough 😂 but flow state is simply a smaller picture of this that athletes, creatives and others tap into

Yea i see what you mean.

11 hours ago, Moon said:

Whippin what- driving?

Actually I play a "know-it-all" character, it's one of my ways of showing off and harvesting energy between knowing how to cook well, or making lame jokes; Since I have to know everything, I have to have a varied vocabulary in all circumstances, so I end up using words/expressions that I don't master.😂

I wanted to say that I also mix musical styles

11 hours ago, Moon said:

Tout va bien? 🤣

Eheh.

You learn french maybe ? or it's just a wink.

11 hours ago, Moon said:

Nicee. Yeah he’s a basic guy tbf, any recent music you’ve enjoyed you wanna share 👀(even if you’re you’re boycotting music now 😂) 

Ahah, then I'm not an ascetic either, I'm capable of giving nutritional advice while smoking cigarettes😂

The last 3 songs I listened to, in my history :

 

11 hours ago, Moon said:

Wow love the dedication to actualizing 😉

Thanks ahah, you're sweet; But it's also a lot of random post, to waste time.
I am a distance student and I was handicapped for a long time by very very severe insomnia (which I no longer have! Thank God), so I had a lot of time.

11 hours ago, Moon said:

Tbf I see a lot of you posting on journals a lot so maybe a huge part of is that- lowkey therapy? Being social? Mix of both maybe

I do this to push myself to put my thoughts into shape, even if they are fleeting.

I saw you have a journal too.

11 hours ago, Moon said:

I had different relationships to each one

Instagram used to bring up insecurities but now it kinda has the opposite effect

Why if you don't mind ? 

11 hours ago, Moon said:

Twitter was the one I was reallyyy hooked on and always doomscrolling and engaging in think pieces (not necessarily negative but too much mental masturbation at the time). Elon being more active on it helped me delete my account 😂😂

Lol i see really well. 

Did you get upset about politics? Stuff like that?

11 hours ago, Moon said:

Wbu? Which ones were you always on outside this forum

At one time I hung out a bit on a big French forum, but the level is quite low and there are a lot of unpleasant people, so I stopped.
I have Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Whatsapp etc; I can use them to communicate with people if necessary, but otherwise I'm never active on these things.