Unsure Of Current Direction.

[alyra]

like I've made a lot of progress with my overall togetherness, wellbeing. but, I'm just so lazy.. I don't set ambitious goals, and I don't do the goals I do set, easy goals I know I can do but I just... I don't. I've never really been motivated so that's not exactly new but.. I also just, I don't care anymore. I really don't. and I know that isn't good. I could use some suggestions. 

[Revolutionary Think]

Depends on what you're trying to accomplish or what your purpose is. What kind of effort are you putting toward it?

[Tendani]

I think your Goals are not align with your purpose, you should ask yourself why do you do what you do?

The reason why you want to do what you want to do it must be bigger than, what you will loose by not doing it.

You can not be where you want to be, if you always keep on quitting stuff.

 

Find your the reason Why, you wanna do what you wanna do.

[Salaam]

Motivation, passion, and desire depend on other things to be at certain levels in order to grow and become more palpable. Meaning, investment, gratification, facing resistance, risking vulnerability... you sound apathetic and that apathy is creating a resistance and draining you of investment/care, which then further increases the resistance you face as you attempt to shift that balance, because it makes it harder for things inside us to energize and activate. 

Eventually you're going to have to face that resistance and burn through that apathy, because it's numbing influence also effects your cognitive abilities, which will impact the choices you make. It's like you recognize intellectually that it's not a good thing, but maybe only in a dull kind of way, because the rest of your layers are under that insulating blanket of apathy to one degree or another.

If I was in your situation I'd be seeing that numbness as something I don't want creeping and growing inside me. I'd find meaning in facing and shifting it, appreciating every small inch of change, and I'd see it as deep level self-care. I'd find goals that scare me and make me uncomfortable but also tantalize me with their potential positive impact, using that tension to shake me from my apathy and the fear to sensitize me, sharpening my senses. It feels so damn good when you come out the other side with success in those types of goals! You feel so alive and it creates momentum and a craving for more (that rise in gratification levels and meaning, which also increases investment). 

And if you're at the place where your motivation is so depressed you can't even feel a trickle of those feelings, then you start from zero and go after a goal even though your body isn't releasing and breathing passion. Trusting that seeing the action through will create shifts and lift some of that numbness during the process.

And it usually will, there is something powerful in actually doing a thing that brings a tangible benefit to yourself and the world around you. Do some service work and ease the burdens of the people in your life or make a gift for someone or try to brighten up the day of strangers around you with compliments or help.

Pour yourself into something that makes life better and then take the time to appreciate and savor the result.

I basically have shit loads of passion for whatever I want, because I understand how all these different things relate and  can handle the resistance and invest, building up it's vibrancy. So I say the above, from a place of practical application and success. I hope it helps, because it works, even if it can be very hard at times (but again that's just the level of resistance at play). 

 

Edited April 21, 2017 by Salaam