RickyFitts

First verse of the song: Some say love is a burning thing That it makes a fiery ring Oh but I know love as a fading thing Just as fickle as a feather in a stream See, honey, I saw love, You see it came to me It puts its face up to my face so I could see Yeah then I saw love disfigure me Into something I am not recognizing Zulabelle posted this on a forum we both frequented after our intensely loving relationship had fizzled. Even when she was heartbroken, she was beautiful...

@Marcel You know, I remember the spiritual teacher Jon Bernie saying that God gives the strong ones the most to deal with, because they can deal with it, and I feel this is very true of you May your life continue on an upward trajectory, my friend I don't think I can even add anything to this, you've summed it up so beautifully (I've never heard the expression 'giving the monster a hug', but I like it a lot! ) You're so right about the need for compassion, understanding, acceptance, and vulnerability - giving myself these things has been probably the most challenging thing I've had to do (and I had to end up in a very bad way before I learnt how to), but also the most rewarding. And I've developed so much compassion in the process, not only for myself but also for the human condition more generally - what an overwhelming ordeal it can seem to be human sometimes, and yet what a wonderful, exhilarating thing, too.

Right, so you need to integrate those qualities whilst making sure that you don't let go of who you are (as you said in your first post) in order to realise your potential - that's so interesting, thank you for elaborating You have so much potential, Gianna, I so hope that you can realise it - and I'm sure you will

Yyyikes! Okay yeah, I might struggle to retain my zen-like equilibrium in that situation, too! But there's nothing to fear, not even fear itself (I'm going to have to slightly disagree with FDR on that one.)

Deeply feeling into the rage - yeah, that's the key I think. I've come to realise that underneath every raging monster, there's a distraught child bawling its eyes out, but the tendency (particularly in men, and I'm no exception) is to get caught in the surface anger. I actually had a bit of a breakdown a few months back where I just cried and cried, all this grief came pouring out of me; felt off for about a week after (lost my appetite, felt rather fragile), though it probably did me a lot of good in the long-run to get that out of my system. I'll keep in mind the suggestion about listening to music that enhances the feeling, though - thanks for your input, buddy, really appreciate it Old habits die hard, pal! But honestly, you're doing so well, you're an example to others

Just wonderful, I'm so, so happy for you, my friend

I do keep attracting the same kind of partner, so I'm intrigued by this notion of becoming that partner - could you expand on this, what would it look like in practice? This is so profound, and so beautiful

Oh I know, I know! So easy to dispense this advice, so much more difficult to put it into action! Particularly when it goes against our instincts - but it's like anything, it gets easier with practice And if I know one thing about you, Gianna, it's that you're a very quick study

@Gianna Always, I treasure your threads I love you too, my soul sister Gianna

I'm noticing some soreness in my left wrist at the moment, I've become aware over the last few years of just how much tension is stored up in both of my wrists - it appears to be connected to my blocked heart chakra in some way, when I feel into the soreness I notice that it appears to be connected to some upset I feel in that area (and the heart apparently governs the arms and hands, so this would seem to make sense). Interesting to observe how it all links together. The pressure in my heart is still significant (as it is in my head), as are the feelings of deep upset and anger (oh the rage, the murderous, blistering rage!), but I'm getting there, slowly but surely.

Hard to shake these habits, mate! Just notice what's driving the mental activity on an emotional level (mind and emotions are very much linked), and allow those underlying emotions to be felt, even if they feel uncomfortable, scary, or painful.

I love that you share here, though, your threads are always so interesting

Beautiful insight Best to just take thinking out of the equation altogether and experience the fear directly if it happens to be present, I think. So much of our thinking is simply an unconscious attempt to try to keep the fear at bay. Can be easier said done though, obviously, given that we do tend to be a very mind-centred species. So much of the process of spiritual liberation takes place below the neckline, I believe (and as above, so below, as the saying goes, the mind is but a reflection of the body), which is why I place so much importance on body-centred practices.

Maybe words'll come in time. For now, just enjoy it my friend, you deserve it

Takes one to know one, lovely

Oh heavens above, what IS this madness?? Good Lord, is there a four o'clock in the morning now?? Aw you're so welcome, glad if I can make your day a little easier Sounds like you've got a hectic day ahead of you - take real good care of yourself darl, I'll be thinking of you Weekend in the caves though, that should be absolutely amazing! Can't wait to see the pics too

@ryangold Yep, couldn't be happier for you two - so happy you found one another, it's a really beautiful thing

That's something you've got to figure out for yourself, I'm afraid! As a general rule, if I'm in two minds about whether I should continue my practice or not, I carry on with it; other times you just know when you need to ease up, but you'll figure it out as you go along. I'd echo the advice of @Thought Art to listen to your body, that's very solid advice I'd say - might take a bit of practice if you're not in the habit of listening to what your body's telling you, but it gets easier the more in tune with it you are.

I love this quote so much, thanks for the info @Ismael

Recognise that you've got no valid reason to hold on to any feelings of resentment, anger, bitterness, etc., towards others that you may harbour, and resolve to let go of those feelings. That's not to say that it's necessarily easy to let go of these feelings, but recognising that there's no good reason to hold on to them is an important first step.

Something else that just came to mind is that acupuncture can apparently be helpful in alleviating kundalini symptoms, that might be an option to consider if you're really struggling with it.

I'm assuming (possibly wrongly!) that the profound realisation of oneness you had that you talked about on another thread was a sort of energetic catalyst, although I don't know if you were meditating before that? I know those sorts of experiences can trigger significant movements of energy (I remember feeling a subtle movement of energy through my spine and out the top of my head when I had my initial awakening), they can be catalysts for kundalini awakenings. What you're describing sounds completely normal though, I experience the rocking back and forth and side to side sometimes too - an allowing practice sounds perfect, the key thing is just to relax as much as you can and then the energy can gradually work through any blockages in your system. Be very gentle with yourself though, if you feel like you need to ease off your practice then by all means do so, listen to what your body's telling you; don't be alarmed if you find that certain emotions are starting to arise, too (fear, sadness, anger, etc.), that's just the body releasing what had previously been suppressed. Just do what you need to do in the moment in order to feel better if that does happen, and trust that the feelings will pass, eventually. As for grounding, just walking around and being in contact with the ground can help with that, as can visualisations like the one above where you're visualising roots growing from your feet into the ground, that'll just help you to shift your attention into your body as much as anything. A few deep belly breaths, in through the nose and out through the mouth (being sure to relax your body before you start breathing, so that you can breathe without straining), can help to alleviate any anxiety or tension you might be feeling. (Sorry, I know I'm throwing a lot of information at you there, I'm sure you know a lot of this stuff already!)

@noticeom Excellent post, agree with everything you said. I've started meditating to music recently, and I've found it to be a refreshing change from meditating in silence - I'm particularly feeling this one at the moment, I find it conducive to meditation:

@Gianna Really hope it helps darl, I know it's not very much fun when the energy's stirring up all that discomfort and nausea Can take a while for your body to adjust to all the energy that's been freed up in your system, that does tend to be a challenging part of the journey for the majority of people (myself very much included!), I know a regular body-centred practice has been a must for me personally.

Ugh, I dunno, maybe I'm old-fashioned but how's about relating to women on a human level, first and foremost?