Joseph Maynor

I agree with that because most people suck at intimate relationship building work as an aspect of personal development work. And most people don't grab the selection process like a bull by the horns, they wanna sleep together after the second date and ignore all the interviewing that needs to be done and the slow moving unearthing and relationship building layers that should come before having sex. There's a reason why lots of smart cultures wait until marriage to have sex. They're making sure the foundation of the relationship is ok before the relationship is complicated by and intoxicated with sex.

It works if you have the personal development skills to make it work. Especially if you've executed the selection process for your intimate relationship well and you know why you wanna be in an intimate relationship and what function you want that intimate relationship to play in your life and in your vision for your life. When you wire in that system, you can make the monogomy commitment with pride.

We need to take sex out of our Shadows already. This is one of the cons of white-knuckle clinging to the asceticism end of the Paradox Of Asceticism And Hedonism which creates a lock and causes suffering for yourself and for others.

I'm not mistaking the map for the territory, don't worry. We use these maps to develop ourselves not to believe in them like facts about reality.

Definitely! White-knuckle clinging to seriousness It's a lock.

Hay man. Jokes are good. You need to learn how to joke. Joking* is a necessary skill for advanced persona development. *The Mechanics And Dynamics Of Humor

I'm gonna join Toastmasters ASAP and probably go for the rest of my life.

You gotta take a deep research dive into doing this. I'm doing it too. Great question. Good luck on your web development project.

Join Toastmasters dude. I'm planning on doing that asap. Maybe we can join the same club here in the City! PM me, we'll go together. Videos on point to watch:

Interesting

Can you every really transcend your intuition in the same way that you can transcend the mind, the heart, and the body? This is a perplexing open research question to chew on for me. It's not readily obvious to me yet how to come to any kind of interesting or useful determination on this issue.

Can you notice these archetypes in the way your personas express themselves? What shapes do these archetypes have? Describe. I'm having a hard time noticing and/or distinguishing these archetypes in my intimate relationship from the other archetypes that my and my intimate partner's personas express themselves through.

Nice. I need to work on 2 and 3. Thanks for the list. I'll make a note in my personal development journal.

Sure. I'm just trying to distinguish criticism coming from a good place vs. criticism coming from a bad place. But criticism coming from a bad place can still be useful, it's just gonna have shadier intentions and motives attached to it. I wouldn't cling to that distinction too tightly, I was just trying to draw a useful loose distinction. There are pros and cons to this distinction though, and I don't want the cons of it to outweigh the pros of it.

Sure, it depends on context, I agree. But as personal development students and teachers we should have the balls to be able to give and receive criticism if it's given in good faith with honest intent even if it's coming from a place of Ego. Ego is not bad, we all have Ego. Some of us deny Ego or have Ego in the shadow, but that's a different problem that I'm not gonna address here. We need to toughen up regarding criticism and learn to love it and to value it. Nobody dies when criticism is done. It often hurts, but that's what's needed to goose your Ego-Heartbodymind to change. Change has to be precipitated by some form of criticism, whether it's self-criticism or criticism by others. Otherwise we just stay in lazy mode and do what we're already doing -- jack shit. We need to re-frame criticism as good as personal development students and teachers. Criticism is the #1 value in personal development work.

Can one change without criticism in some form, including but not limited to self-criticism? Can one do personal development work without changing? Criticism is the life-blood of personal development work. Criticism is the #1 value in personal development work. When you pooh-pooh criticism, you cut your legs out from under you in your personal development work and you spread a counter-productive idea to others like a virus. Criticism is what gooses you to change, otherwise you'll just stay in your current state. So we should embrace and honor criticism (self-criticism and criticism from others) as personal development students and teachers. When someone takes the time to criticize you in this work, instead of saying fuck you, you should say thank you. Video on point to watch:

Do you see that you're taking a corrective attitude towards others with this post? You're doing what you're criticizing. I'm flabbergasted as to how common this blind-spot is. It see this all the time on here. And I point this trap out all the time on here and it never seems to sink in. How can we better teach this trap on here? Do I need to write an essay on this topic in my Journal for the 100th time? Maybe I need to stand on my head with funny pictures moving behind me and speak in a robot voice with flowers next to me to make this trap sink in. This is a case of: your attempt to control is bad and my attempt to control is good. Well you can't have it both ways if you're putting taking a corrective attitude as a whole on trial. You're gonna go down with your own conviction which is unsustainable for you and for everyone else. It's an unsustainable standard you're proposing. It's a case of do what I say not as I do. Now that's a controlling attitude that's not only unreasonable, but dictatorial and lacking in full awareness. This is a common Stage Green trap that's really annoying and frustrating to me because it comes up so often and it's hard to teach someone out of it. You gotta get to Stage Yellow to really fully realize this blind-spot for what it is. Stage Green takes its morality as the truth rather than just another perspective among perspectives. This causes a trap and a blind-spot that unfortunately one has to get to Stage Yellow to fully see through.

Bach was on a whole 'nother level wasn't he. He's like the Miles Davis of Classical Music. Progressive as f*ck. Ingenious.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Structures_from_Silence

Learn to find your authentic will which is buried under a lot of "oughts" and a lot of conditioning. This is called your "True North". You gotta uncover this authentic will and honor it.

Can I offer you something? What can I offer you? I want to give you something truly valuable.

Yes. But don't let your ideas blind your observation.

Why are you telling me what I can observe? What I observe is what I observe. I don't need anybody to tell me what I can observe. That's a bit pretentious and obviously incorrect.

But I do know. I'm a keen observer.

I see a lot of arrogance in people who claim to be Enlightened actually. The humility is a front. Behind that facade of humility is a desire to be significant usually. Enlightenment is not about "being humble". Enlightenment is about fidelity to truth. And truth includes the huge Egos that many so called Enlightened people have in their shadows. There's an energy of arrogance to many so called Enlightened people. And that's fine, it's just these people don't realize it. They've dissociated from their Ego, so their Egoic expressions are functioning a lot from their shadow.