Psychonaut

@Leo Gura New videos on sexuality would be appreciated my man! Early on you had quite a few, but I wonder if we could lift the topic of sexuality up a bit from the sticky mud it has been vegetating in for quite some time now.

I call this phenomenon the "spiritual salt shaker": Whenever someone thinks he is being super spiritual and is super helpful but just vomiting words all over the place. Basically someone is bringing out their spiritual salt shaker and using it until the food tastes only of salt. Noone gets anywhere or is helped in any way. SSS = ?Spiritual Salt Shaker?

@Jack Walter Leon I love Hitler more than Trump and even Putin. Mähhhh mäh mäh mäh. He was an expensive sacrifice, but at least people are a bit more critical about the state in Germany. I'm proud to be german, we are the best. Better than everyone .

Why did I read through this

One question remains. It has been bugging me for months, even years. Every time I watch a new video by Leo this question returns. I cannot find an answer to it. It seems to be the one question that keeps me up at night. It's the one thing that I cannot share with her when she asks "Honey what is bothering you?". "It is nothing" I can't find an answer to myself. Where is the video where Leo lets us gaze into his otherworldly eyes of pure consciousness. My girl does it for me, I do it for her. I want to see those eyes gaze deeply into mine. No lips moving, no sound being uttered. I want to just stare right back at myself. Where is the video were you show yourself? 3 hours of no distractions in pure presence? Pretty please, you don't need to say another word. It's fine, you can let go now and trust me. All is good in the hood. All is well as I can tell. Shhhhhhh shhhh. It's fine. It will feel like falling asleep. I will be here holding you when you wake up. I have been here all along, now you have found me. I have always been there, have always been you. You have always been. You always will be. Shhhhhh please don't say anything. Shhhhhh smile in my face. Breathe in, breathe out. Can you feel it? Feel it, flowing through you. Feel it more. More. Come on. Feel it through and through. Now what is it that you wanted to say? Was there anything? Nothing? No more words? Good.

Nithyananda is a troll. Me and my friend used to exchange youtube videos of him and laugh our ass of at the shit he said,.

In my experience to fully let go of something I need to see its emptiness and it looses its power over me. Demonizing something will not dissolve your desire to engage in what you are demonizing. When it is time it will fall away like you have shed a layer of skin. Then you are free of it and it won't come back either. Stay aware and trust that were you are now is where you need to be.

It is beneficial for the feminine to have you think that sex is a commodity. Turn the tables so that you are the one gracing her patch of grass with your combine harvester. It's not her allowing you to do so after meeting her list of demands. Neurochemically speaking sex is interesting. It is a cocktail of many chemicals. Comparing it to drugs, is like comparing a three course meal to a candy-bar. Sure there are some addictive chemicals, e.g. but sex is not about that, it is much more. Most people don't go deeper than skin deep or don't even get to the skin part lol.

Sex is not an object that becomes more valuable the scarcer it is.

Mastering sexual energy is one of the most challenging energies. Don't be afraid of it. It is unpredictable and it tends to feel like you are being fucked by it instead of you doing the fucking. It makes me do random things, but these random bursts of energy get me laid. Sex is one of those areas that can be explored to whatever depth you desire. It is similar to food in a way. Both are an experience and your level of awareness during the experience determines how much you get from it. You can eat a fastfood microwaved pizza or go for a three course meal with matching wine. Also the amount of flavor and taste you get from food depends on how much you open up to the sensations. Sex is similar in a way that it is an exercise in being fully there and fully feeling the girl. Feeling the entire experience and how everything makes a difference for her. The way she can feel your presence by overwhelming you with the feeling of her welcome and opening up to you. By training yourself through non ejaculatory masturbation you will actually feel more of the sensations. The reason for this is that there is no orgasm. It doesn't exist. You will not orgasm. She can do whatever she wants. She can deep throat you while begging you to cum in her mouth. You will only cum if you want to. If there is no orgasm, there is nothing to look forward to and all you have are the sensations of what you are feeling now. By feeling fully you receive one of the greatest gifts the feminine can give you. It can pull you into the present moment like no other wrecking ball. Having so much control over the orgasm is an intense power. It is Godlike control and that is what she wants too. On a godly level you want her to open up and have her surrender fully so that you can fill her entirely. At the same time you don't loose yourself in her. She trusts that you will be there while she is fully bare spiritually. From time to time you have to let go of some of the energy. There was a month in which I didn't ejaculate but had sex three times. It got the point where I was aware in a dream that I would cum in real life and I stopped the dream. After 3 weeks I had so much energy that my lower back was starting to hurt badly and my penis too. I wanted to release but I didn't trust the girl. I was battling with myself. I thought she was too fat and "undeserving" of me. I realized that she was fully open already and willing to receive. My last girl "rejected" me by not letting me fully penetrate her. She only wanted skin deep sex. In a way it must be scary for the girl, just like a an acid trip. She has to trust me like she has to trust acid when she takes it. My last girl bailed every time I was about to take her over the edge. My new girl is open though. It is beautiful to see. She is beautiful. I can see her and feel her. Having a girl trust you fully is a true gift. The feeling of acceptance and love is indescribable. You are finally free by being pure consciousness and fully present and in control. You are an unshakable rock, she is the ocean bashing against the rock. She is the other side that feels everything and dissolves in the feeling. She is in a state of surrender to feeling while you are just there and aware. Hmmmm, ^^ hope this helps a bit or gives a vision or motivation. If it is not clear I'll welcome questions. I am very interested in sex and trying to go as deep as possible by reading everything I can find.

Let me give me my 2 cents on this. Right from the start I will tell you I have a lot of sexual energy. I used to masturbate like 5 times a day kind of bad. I have tried no-fap, regular sex and non-ejaculatory masturbation. No-fap is easier than balancing sexual energy. For me I gain more from being able to sustain higher amounts of sexual energy without needing to expell it. Releasing becomes a matter of choice. No-fap "extinguished" sexual pleasure after a while for me and then it is lost as an energy to use for growth. Its easier to eat no cookies, than to eat one cookie and then resist eating the second. To me there is value in masturbating even when there is the possibility of sex. At least for me I actually only have and want to have sex once every week or two. So when I masturbate I think of new ways to have sex with my girl and imagine it. It keeps the sexual energy alive and makes me look forward to actually having sex. I also just enjoy the edginess of being horny.

Sex is easier than ever to get and neither a commodity or something for what you have to give up anything.

You guys made me lough.

Okay I'm in on one path. The only one.

But does he offer solutions or just watch as everything unfolds?

Foreplay is all good and shit, but at some point you gotta do something or it will explode and make a mess. You can try the full dose. But it is not really about the dosage. I have micro dosed acid for a few months now. There are instances were a low micro dosed acid trip gave me a very valuable insight that I might have missed on a full trip with all the bells and whistles. A higher dosed micro dose, combined with yoga and some meditation can also be a valuable experience. Acid never took me the full way, so for me personally as long as I gain something that I can change/apply to my life to improve it I am happy.

@AlphaAbundance From my limited experience the feelings of dread, wasting your life are the points that define the existential terror/fear. Sit with it, don't distract yourself, treat it as you would a crying baby.

@Ellenier Thanks for the info. I have been trying to get my hands on some 5-MeO as of lately. Most of it is freebase and I ain't smoking it. So this will come in handy.... Funny how the man's butthole opens up all new worlds. *Hide* *ouuuuuuush* *weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh*

What I like about the liquid acid is that the whole solution is at the same dosage, so it is predictable. I do the 1 day acid, 2 days off as recommended.

I'm opening this topic because like everywhere in the world I see that people are judging other perspectives. There is always some word or some definition of value that people use to make other perspectives worse. Just stop doing that. On here it is consciousness. "Higher and lower consciousness". As if you had a scale for that. There is not a single perspective that can explain everything. Don't judge other perspectives. Science is a perspective. It can't explain everything. Philosophy is a perspective. Religion is a perspective. Self actualization is also just another perspective. Almost every perspective is here to explain something and I haven't found a single perspective that is perfect. The all have flaws, because they are made up by humans. Humans are flawed that is why all the perspectives are flawed as well. When you get obsessed with one single perspective, you will see that it creates conflict. Most conflicts are just because of differing perspectives. Drop the perspectives and try to enjoy everything. Even if it is a "lower consciousness" activity with your friends.

@Leo Gura It is very interesting to me how different drugs affect different people. I have taken Modafinil basically every day for about 2-3 months and never experienced the strong effects others report. Maybe my dopamine is already so high that Modafinil doesn't work for me. It is also possible that me supplementing Acetyl-L-Tyrosine, CDP-Choline and Acetyl-L-Carnitine somehow interferes with the metabolic pathway or mode of action of Modafinil. However I took Modafinil once without those supplements and got a headache. The headache went away after supplementing. I always thought it was just my pills, but I have given one to a friend and he said that he wrote 6 pages on Modafinil instead of the usual 1.5 pages he was able to write the previous days. He had already planned 2 days for the workload and was super happy complete it in one day and take the next day off. To confirm that it was not the long time usage of Modafinil was the cause of it not working for me I actually took a full 200mg pill today after a few weeks of not using it. I also did not supplement anything, besides drinking a coffee. I felt something in my brain, a pressure, but no additional motivation. I can confirm that it unfortunately does not work for me. I wanted it to work so badly. For me 10ug of micro'd acid has the effect that you describe you get from Modafinil. The first trip on 10ug might be a bit distracting, as the first trip on 20ug will be. But one gets used to it. There is maybe 1-2 hours at the beginning where you might be distracted. So to combat that you just try to do other things like cooking/eating during that time. It works for me, because I usually meditate, cook, eat, shower in the morning. It actually takes me about 2 hours after getting up, before I do real work. I take my liquid acid quite soon after getting up and once the effects wear of a bit I am ready to do my work. For me micro'd acid has profound effects. I cannot express how grateful I am to have found this tool, which isn't just very powerful, but also affordable. Gratefulness Creativity Doing what I am supposed to do, following the plan Being more present when people are around Better mood Compared to regular acid, which I usually take in the 200-600ug range, microdosing may still bring up issues and insights that should be looked at. However it is not as overwhelming as a full trip and for me at least it is usually only one topic. This allows me to actually process it without overloading myself with baggage. I feel micro dosing acid keeps me on track and helps me to continuously improve. Dosages 10ug: This is my standard dosage, on which I am in a better mood and people react positively to me 20ug: This my dosage at the moment for days on which I could do work, but there are no deadlines the next day. On the first 2 hours it is a bit hard to be around people, as there are effects. This dosage is like a mini trip and very different from 10ug. 30ug: I have only done this once and will probably not do it often. This is an actual trip. It is really challenging to be around people. There are mind altering effects. This really feels like a trip, just that it is not that long. I hope this helps you.

When I take handwritten notes they feel more personal. I have found that I am more likely to actually revisit them compared to written notes. My handwritten notes are more of a drawing/sketch than notes. F.e. When Leo talks about balancing two things I will draw a seesaw with the two items.

@dimitri Good work brother from another mother. Keep on chopping down the trees in the forest. Eventually we'll get there.

Spiritual vomit. Like usual on this forum. The body is a powerful tool, better use it.

28 is not old. I wouldn't worry about it. My aunt got married at the age of 35. Once other things have lost their meaning, you might see the value in having children. If not then that is also fine.