BjarkeT

Member
  • Content count

    1,148
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by BjarkeT

  1. I think this topic is really important and can change your life. basically the better judgement your have about what you say do or decision making the more satisfied you will become with your decision. poor judgement will lead to poor life choices while a good judgement can lead to the good life I believe. please consider doing a video on this. Thank you.
  2. Any advice on how to build true genuine friendships? I feel like everyone around me is pretending to like me and aren’t really their true self due to their awareness of my social anxiety which makes them extremely careful. It like they think more about my social anxiety then the actual me. How can you get past all that pretending stuff and connect with who they actually are?
  3. I am almost 25 and still virgin. I don't get why some peoples self esteems is so low because they don't have sex. Your self esteem should be no problem with out sex.
  4. Cal Newport talks about boredom in Deep Work. It might be interesting for you to read.
  5. I personal think quality can be a trap. If you only focus on quality you spend too much time plannnig and not actually creating(in creative fields) and spending too much time trying to make everything perfect however if someone else focus on quantity in the meantime they will have a lot more practice in diffrent things and more experience which in the end will create better results. It's another one of those counterintuitive things in life. I would love to hear Leos thoughts on this.
  6. something I have been thinking about is why don't we spend more time just nothing but to think? The brain is the most complex thing we yet have discovered in the universe so why not use it more? We could spend the time contemplating about the problems we are dealing with and try comming up with solutions for example or what we want out of life but we mostly just go through our day doing what we need to do without actually setting the time to just think. Whens the last time where you set time of just for thinking? I imagine doing so might help create more awareness. Just curious what are you guys thoughts about this?
  7. @7thLetter If you really want to have a relationship with her you main goal with the phone should be to set up meetings so you can see her in real life and create attraction.
  8. You shouldn't try to gain a girls interest through text. You have to do it in real life if at all. "I'm thinking that I either send her a text acknowledging my mistakes that the texts I sent her back then were awkward or cringe" Probably shouldn't. It may come off as "beta". "or a simple "Hey how's it been." This would probably be better. But you should have a mindset that there are many fish in the sea so to speak not just one special one.
  9. Don't rely on motivation instead rely on discipline and having a good system. If you feel like it or not is irrelevant just do it. Also instead of being driving by motivation which only last so long. Be Driven by purpose instead which can last for years.
  10. What I recommend is first start something that is interesting to you then always try to get better at it. The better you are at something the more likely it is to feel like a passion. You don't need to think too much if a specefic thing is right for you or if there is something better out there just pick something you like. You should check out Cal Newports book So Good They Can't Ignore You which goes in detail on how to find your passion. If you are interested in the "how" of getting good I recommend checking out Peak by Anders Ericsson. Or bassically read a lot of stuff about Deliberate Practice. If you are unsure about what to pick just explore different interests(Drawing, Music, Film, Science etc.) until you find something that interest you.
  11. You could find a passion. That's what I do with my free time. Practicing a lot of piano and composing music. Try to find something that interest you and get really good at it.
  12. 1# Family. 2# Friends. 3# Music.
  13. @Anirban657 You are welcome hope it works out for you
  14. Regarding social anxiety which I have my self what works for me at least is to allow your self to fully feel the anxiety and accept how you feel again and again. That procces might help reduce it over time but medicin also helps. If we don't allow ourself to fully feel each emotions they will be stuck in our body so we have to release it by fully feeling it for it to be "gone". Regarding stress related to working too much what helps me is to have at least one day off and take frequent breaks. Something that might help you is Cal Newports Shutdown ritual which should help release stress but I think you should give the course a try but probably lower your expectations so you won't be dissapointed if it doesn't go 100% to your expectations.
  15. It probably depends on what source of your anxiety and depression is. Depending on what the source is you may even need a different solution but it would likely be a good start to open up to other people about how you feel.
  16. Why see them as two different kind of practice and not one? That's what I do. I do deliberate practice at something that I love to do so all the hard work is worth doing. But deliberate practice isn't just about hard work but rather about how you work. By the way if you want to improve be careful about enjoying your practice. If you enjoy practicing you might not actually pushing your self outside your comfortzone and instead be in a flow state which means you won't improve. Practice should be with a sense of difficulty which is a sign of pushing your skills which leads to improvement.
  17. Peak by Anders Ericsson and Deep Work by Cal Newport.
  18. "Some of the instruments are just too heavy for my FL Studio to render, which is frustrating and very limiting." i recommend either getting a better computer with more ram, better cpu and ssd or a notation software like Dorico or sibelius and get noteperformer. It's a good alternativ to sample libraries out there and it doesn't requrie much ram. "But back to the writer's block. I just don't really know what to think about in this process. What are some good mindsets and ideas I should take while doing those 15 minutes. I get also really frustrated when my song is just a loop, or the sounds are not as I had in my head." I am currently watching mike verta masterclass called kickstarter where he talk about the process of composing. What he recomends so far is just start and when you end for the day always end with an unfinished idea so that when you come back tomorrow you have something to work with instead of being completly blank. If you feel like you are not where you want to be and things sound similar to what you have composed in the past I recommend asking an experience composer for feedback so you know what to improve on and also study a lot of scores. (you can for free on imslp.org) As of mindset I recommend to watch bulldog mindset on youtube he have a series called "How to succeed in life in 20 days" one of those videos he talks about embracing the grind which is work which is not enjoyable maybe even boring. Pretty much anything in life can become that the key to succeed is just to embrace the work even when it becomes a grind. If you really want to be serious as a composer I recommend doing a lot more than just 15 mins. I personally practice the piano 3 hours(which might not even be enough) a day even if i don't feel like it and also compose for a few hours. A good way to find time in your day is to use timeboxing which is something Cal Newport talks about. Some books you may find interesting is: Deep work and so good they can't ignore you by Cal Newport, Ultralearning by scott young, Scott youngs top performer course(not a book though) Peak by anders ericsson. And something which you might find interesting is something called the The Dan Plan which is about a guy trying to become world class in golf by trying to get to his 10000 hours of deliberate practice in that field. It's not music related but the idea of working 10000 hours in a field to become good may be inspiring. Regarding the composing process I recomend to spend a lot of time searching for good ideas and for possiblities that way you may come up with something even better. Also once you have an idea that's not so good you can take that and develop it further so it becomes a more complete idea. Be patient and don't just use the first idea that comes to mind. Hope you found any of this helpful. Best of luck with your career. By the way watching tutorials (or analyzing scores) can be really helpful. If you some how feel like you don't improve anymore getting a new insight can help breakthrough that wall. I think its good to balance practice and knowlegde. If you just practice without any knowlegde of what you are doing then you may not be able to improve much. It's similar to this quote by Leonardo Da Vinci “He who loves practice without theory is like the sailor who boards ship without a rudder and compass and never knows where he may cast.” Without knowlegde you are just practice aimlessning never going in a specefic direction but with knowlegde you become aware of your own weakness and know why they don't work and how to fix them. That's one of the keys to improve.
  19. I think education gives us a huge advantage in life it give us the ability to know something that we never knew before or how we can accomplish our goals. There is a lot of good books out there and courses that for example give us the ability to be a superstar if we chose to take action on it. It doesn't mean its easy but its a huge step up from not knowing what to do at all to know what steps you need to take. Without education, you may be stuck for years or a lifetime in a certain area of your life but with the right education you are no longer stuck and know what to do. Its also a powerful tool to change your mindset for the better. would be great with a video on this.
  20. I agree would be a good video. Also when you having a interest in something and see someone better than you how you can avoid getting discouraged in that situation or when avoiding getting discouraged or self doubting when learning hard things.
  21. I don't think most people are ready to hear that they are god and so on it's so different from what most people believe in.
  22. https://www.calnewport.com/blog/2014/06/05/dont-fight-distraction-make-it-irrelevant/ Read a lot of what Cal Newport writes. He talks about a lot on how to find focus in a distracted age. For motivation, it helps with a long-term vision of what you want to accomplish. Don't look for motivation outside yourself. Your motivation should be strong enough to make you work past challenges that are outside your comfort zone and may be uncomfortable.
  23. For me, it seems pretty easy to be "disciplined" just turn what you need to do into a habit and it becomes easier to do. For the last 13 days, I have been practicing piano for 3 hours every day and it wasn't that hard because I made it into a habit. Stop thinking you need motivation to do what you need to do just pull yourself together and do it. Sometimes there really is no way out of it but once it's done you won't have to think about it for the day and once you actually do it you will realize it isn't actually that bad. In essence, it's just: "I don't feel like it but I am just gonna do it anyway" It can help of course if you have a bigger vision/purpose for what you want to do.
  24. I would say so at some areas. In the past i would have the urge when watching a movie or leos videos to multitask by doing something else at the same time but now I can just sit and listen/watching the movie without feeling the need to be distracted and I feel like more and more I can make my self do things which I should do even if I don't feel like it, for example, reading for an hour when you don't feel like reading. I never really had a anger problems. Also I still have some anxiety but whenever it comes I try to just let it go(or first fully feel it and then let it go) and be free of worry.
  25. The motivation should come from within and not from someone else.