Adam M

@Tony 845 many people believe that their thoughts are responsible for their decisions... I challenge you to look into your direct experience and see that most of your decisions are not logical but feeling-based.

@molosku getting shrooms in Pai (best ones are from Valhala) is a piece of cake...no worries about laws at all

Here it is: @AdamDiC and I are staying at a place called Pai in northern Thailand. We got many reccomendations from many people to try the 'mushroom shake' from this little jungle shack called "Valhalla." So we woke up early one morning, skipped breakfast and meditated for an hour before riding our bikes towards Valhalla. The shroom shake tasted like banana and cocoa and it's impossible to tell how many grams or what type of shrooms. However the guy said that it was enough for one person. I'm pretty sure they were not dried, but fresh. After downing the shake we went for a short walk where a nice dog followed us and we found a little sanctuary in the middle of the jungle just off the path as the shrooms started to come on. I set the intention to connect more with nature on this trip. There wasn't much nausea but I felt a strong body load and a little dizziness as I began to see the shroomy patterns on my hands and other surfaces. There was noticable speckles, lines, and patterns on my hands. A giggly feeling began to take place as I enjoyed the wavy vibe and began experiencing different types of energy and body sensations flowing through me. I surrendered my body to these sensations and allowed my arms and upper body to flow with the energy and it felt sublime. I noticed the beauty of the jungle plants, insects, birds, and salamanders that surrounded the hut. I could feel my conciousness expanding as I allowed my thoughts to flow freely. The shrooms began to take my thoughts into deeper and deeper territory until eventually I was having profound insights about the nature of existence every second. There was very little nausea at this point and I was mesmerized by the sheer beauty and vibrance of the trees and animals that danced in front of my eyes. I continued to have thoughts about the Garden of Eden and the Genesis story in the bible. I slowly began to understand how conciousness and what Lao Tzu calls "the ten thousand things" are related to each other and require each other to remain balanced like yin and yang. For some reason I equated the beauty and form of nature (and of all things) as feminine energy and conciousness as that masculine energy which allows all phenomena to exist. There cannot be anything without conciousness. Without the primordial knowing of awareness. I began to see myself as an instrument through which reality can observe and enjoy it's own beauty. I noticed a deep sameness in all things and also that all things are different. All the beautiful trees and insects and animals were different. But they were also all the same. My trip partner and I were constantly laughing and giggling and enjoying the awesome feeling of love and wonder that came with every mystical insight. I noticed how important my vipassana meditation practice is for allowing me to differentiate concept from actuality. I also noticed how important my philosophical understanding of certain metaphysical ideas was for helping me make sense of what was happening to my conciousness. I began to stand up and allowed the shrooms to move my body and mind any which way they liked and the surrender felt amazing. I also began to talk in a very rhythmic and poetic and also musical tone that both my trip partner and I were able to tap into at the same time. I would say shit like... "Sameness and difference... is the dance... that allows... shit to be." "Sameness... is always the case." "Tune into the music of now" "I AM an Instrument" There was one point where my trip partner and I looked at each other and we both realized at the same time. "I'm scared of you..." "I am you." And we both started dying of laughter as we enjoyed being each other. We were basically thinking the same thing and we were able to finish each other's thoughts. I kept saying: "It's all the same...but different." And it was very profound. We sat and danced and sang in our hut for about three hours as we continued to peak over and over again. It felt almost as if I was continually being separated from God and then reconnecting again with a beautiful "OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHH" And it appeared that this was one facet of the trip as my identity continued to expand and retract and expand and retract over and over again. The best way I can explain it was like fucking God in and out in and out over and over again and it was bliss. "The separateness creates (me and all things) and allows the oneness to be rediscovered. In this way, reality continues to fuck itself through me over and over and over" I was very calm and tranquil and blissful. I also moved very naturally, relaxed, slowly, and mindfully. I felt like an 80 year old tai chi master. After about four hours we started coming down and we noticed that the entire time we were sitting under a giant hornet's nest (LOL). Of course the giant hornets didnt want to interrupt our communion with God so they left us alone as we left them alone. The entire time the dog stayed with us and protected us in our vulnerable state. The come down was pleasant and we were very tired. I went for one of the most scenic walks of my entire life afterwards and then we stopped in on a beginner's yoga class. By that time the shrooms were almost completely out of our system. Words cannot describe how amazing and profound the peak was. The part cannot encapsulate the whole...it's so obvious. But I tried my best Hopefully y'all enjoyed hearing about my most enjoyable and profound trip thus far in my spiritual journey. Pictures

Readjust your expectations. Leo's "lack of content" is a result of your high expectations for him to share 'everything'. In truth, at no point did ever Leo say that he would share everything with us. And if research is so important to you then maybe u should free up some time to do it yourself. Your laziness and false sense of entitlement is horrible for me to read.

I recommend to stop caring. Just listen to your body. Don't be so neurotic.

Do a retreat. That helps me get back in touch with why I'm meditating by showing me deeper levels. Or maybe do some shrooms :)):)

Consider Seeing a psychologist. You are fabricating false stories about your life that some psychotherapy work may help to unravel. "I hate everything, I hate myself." Why not create a mantra that you repeat 50 times a day. "I LOVE EVERYTHING, I LOVE MYSELF" You can be whatever you set your mind to. You are the one who is choosing to identify with such a negative thought-story.

@Ampresus I'm 18. Here is what I would have done different. Less video games Less smoking weed with degenerate friends. Less porn. More reading about anything that interests you in the self help field (you can start on Leo's book list) More effort developing my social skills especially with girls. More focus on more productive hobbies such as playing an intrument or learning Adobe photoshop. Your life is terrible too compared to what is possible with self-actualization work. Meditate every day for 20 minutes. ACTUALLY FKN DO IT.

This is what I have heard according to my studies. After the buddha's enlightenment, he was tempted to not teach because his discovery was so profound that the masses would not understand. However, he realized that even if not everybody could understand. SOME PEOPLE WILL. And that is worth it. I read this in Walpola Rahula's "What the buddha taught" A great read for those who want the essence of buddhism

Hey guys I'm 18 years old and just finished a couple of vipassana retreats in Thailand. I have always been a gifted student and have always enjoyed learning about the world from a young age which is why I love actualized.org so much. I feel that going to college/university to would be a waste of my time and money because I learn best on my own. Plus, I have all the information in the world available to me on the internet for relatively cheap. I have a great business idea that involves learning (my top value) and I think I'm just going to work on that while I just spend most of my time reading, taking notes, contemplating, and meditating. What do you guys think? Is going full autodidact a valid path? I would like to hear your own stories or some feedback

@zenny wow thanks for your help dude, will definitely check out these sources :):) @ajasatya I will definitely not leave college out of the picture...I recently learned about the california institute of integral studies which is a progressive college in cali that offers degrees in psychedelics and conciousness....so may be worth checking out Sometimes though I feel that people use college as a way to STAY in their comfort zone because there is less motivation to create opportunities for yourself..

@Girzo ah yes, thank you for the great advice. Thankfully reading, meditating, and contemplating are also an important part of my business pursuits but I do understand that I will have to make sacrifices.

@aurum I live w my parents plus I can find math tutoring work...also lifeguarding.

Keep meditating. Consider simplifying your lifestyle to make more room for what REALLY is MOST important for you. Take time to figure out what that is.

Lol you're not enlightened

Same here...I took a year off and am currently doing meditation retreats in Thailand... So I guess that's pretty good for a turquoise university and the professor is me lol I dont think that I will be going to university... I learn better as an autodidact anyways, I don't feel that the time/money investment for a university/college is worth it for me personally.

Ah yes, I'm sure the model is wrong and you are right...its hilarious because spiral dynamics even predicts this type of arrogance at stage orange. The main problem here is that you simply haven't SERIOUSLY studied the world from enough perspectives (coming from someone who is stage yellow) and that you lack fundamental conciousness of the present moment which allows your self deceptions to go unnoticed (which is something that a turquoise thinker like Leo would tell you) But overall, you fail to recognize that every argument you're providing has already been completely disproven not only by Leo, but by many other thinkers in history (like Heraclitus and Niels Bohr)

@AdamDiC

Hey guys I just finished another 10 day retreat at Wat Chom Tong in near Chiang Mai, Thailand... The relationship between thoughts and experiences is subtly changing. As I am consistently (as I can) observing impermanence, dukkha, and non self in this present moment. It is easier for me to deal with emotions such as - fear - anger - craving - doubt - pain This is because I am forced to acknowledge impermanence in this moment. My practice consists of 60 minutes of walking meditation with focus on acknowledging walking steps followed by 60 minutes sitting meditation with focus on breathing and various touching points of the body. Most of the practice is simply labeling body movement, feelings, and thoughts. I'm taking a couple day-long breaks between retreats because they are very intense and physically and mentally taxing. 2 nights ago I meditated for 50 hours straight without sleeping or bathing... with 20 minute breaks between each round of walking and sitting and slightly longer breaks to eat. My appreciation for Buddhist teachings has grown tremendously as Buddhist philosophy clearly and precisely shows the path toward enlightenment. Wish me luck...I'm trying my best to stay disciplined.

Yo guys...Jesus was right...Buddha was right...Mohammed was right...they all point towards non-duality "Even this view, which is so pure and so clear, if you cling to it, if you fondle it, if you treasure it and are attached to it, then you do not understand that the teaching is like a raft, it is for getting across but not for holding onto" - Buddha In the same way Jesus' teachings are meant to be a tool for finding truth for yourself but the teaching itself cannot be truth because it is just words and words are only partial.

I cant enjoy bad food because it tastes fake. I've trained my palate with discipline and now I prefer arugala over a pizza/hamburger any day. Meditate more. Stop feeling like you are missing out on unhealthy food. The taste lasts a few moments and then it is gone and you are left with guilt and upset stomach. Your friends are missing out on the feeling of having a healthy body/mind...and that lasts longer than your 5 minutes of mouth pleasure. Work hard at the beginning to take your monkey-like craving for disgusting food that is likely filled with chemicals that will harm you. Learn to enjoy healthy food more than unhealthy food. I dont even want a piece of cheesecake...I would rather have a bowl of strawberries because they taste better to me. They taste clean, pure, and natural. Compared to the cheesecake which tastes too sweet and fake. Meditate more. Do not cheat. Do not cheat. This is especially important at the beginning. Shoot for 100% following your diet strictly and regularly every day. Cheat days do not exist. If you want a cheat day then you are not doing the diet for the right reasons. Research and understand why you are not eating certain food. Learn why bread is disgusting. Learn why milk is disgusting. Learn why hamburgers are disgusting. Your perception of the food will change. I dont even consider pizza to be an edible substance, in fact it grosses me out. Lastly, stop complaining about your diet as if you are being deprived of something. It makes you sound like a victim and it shows that you do not know the value of eating healthy. Meditate more.

@Joseph Maynor that's not the point

@Blissout agreed

keep doing vipassana Keep fapping Observe the cause and effect Eventually it will stop by itself

@Leo Gura I'm working on it lol... trying to build strong mindfulness so I can clear and consistently observe impermanence, unsatisfactoriness, and nonself