Nahm

@Spiral Wizard To me it’s always been odd that people see them as separate. Pm me anytime with specific questions if it’s useful / helpful.

That’s really beautiful. There’s no memory or conscious-memory which is lost. Stuff to know and remember is what you are, not what you have.

Let the thought go. Feeling is certain. Otherwise, you’ll continue creating the undesired emotion / discord. You can do whatever you want either way. You can ‘face the fear’, and you can also see that you’re creating it for no reason. Awareness is already curing. It’s ‘saying’ let the judgement / thinking go. The thinking isn’t ‘wrong’, it just doesn’t feel good. Feeling = awareness. Do what you want to do. If you don’t like how it feels, you don’t actually want to do it. Be sure to write on your dreamboard what it is you do actually want to do. Get it out of your head and in front of you. Now your vantage point is transcendent of it (vs it swirling around aimlessly in the mind). Ultimately, the only certainty in life, is love. So love uncertainty, and you’ll love living. Uncertainty = fun. Uncertainty = humor. We love that stuff.

@Verdesbird Are you trying find out if Leo is right...or finding the Truth of reality directly ‘for yourself’? As you take more trips, you’ll see the deconstruction and reconstruction clearer, and inevitably know there is only ever ‘pure consciousness’. It’ll still taste like a steak. Maybe contemplate ‘if a tree falls in the woods...’. Or, what is seen, but not by you...what is heard, but not by you...what is known, but not by you?

@Victor Mgazi Too direct perhaps. I believe if you contemplate those questions, there'll be no identity or meaning, and you’ll see you’re creating them.

@Victor Mgazi You may have held your relative truths there. Dunno.

@zeroISinfinity Heck yes! It is amazing how all the ‘serious stuff’ is seen through & just slips away. All the trivial bickering nonsense, was just expression & creating in the waiting. From ? to ? ?. Every kid should have a dream & a dreamboard. ☺️

@Victor Mgazi Don’t inspect anymore.

@legendary God’s so innocent & funny.

@zeroISinfinity Of proper sober tripping of the balls. You know, where you realize “you” is a concentration of consciousness, rather than a person + concentration.

Focusing on perception, less goes to thought. Also try the same thing, with sensation within the entire body (instead of perception). Then back and fourth. Then both at the same time, and ‘connect’ sensation in the body with the object of concentration. It should kick you up at least a gram and a half.

@Someone here Ever imagine something when you were a kid, that these days you don’t remember?

@Dua That’s awesome! You can be even more ‘active’ about it too. Direct attention to your leg, and relax into it, breath into it. Use your imagination in a way to connect to it in sensation, and just feel for feeling / sensation in the leg, and just love it. Seriously. Tell it (in your mind) “everything’s ok”, “everything’s alright”, “I’m fine”. Think of meditation as comfortable and your space to relax. I vote rls is Relax, Love, Sensation now. Keep in mind, to see about making just one simple change in the name of well being for the body. A food, maybe fluoride free toothpaste, etc. Just one. It really helps the under current, that ‘connection’ within. It’s just another way of self love. The more the better. Really great, thanks for sharing. ??♥️

@Victor Mgazi Appearance, in the direct experience sense, is thought, perception, & feeling. “Break down” your experience of right now, in those three direct experiences. See how they will not combine, and see how they are all combined. The actuality in the sense, how you infinite being are appearing ‘as all this’, would be a years long metadventure. You can though. It’s all you.

@Dua Great to hear! I think you’ll continue to find less rls activity when meditating right after having slept. Sleep is profoundly grounding, more than it is typically given credit. By feeling, I mean the sensation of the body touching anything. The sensation in your feet, touching the floor, and your body touching the chair, or meditation cushion. The feeling on the skin of the fan blowing works just as well too. I hear you on the diet, family, and budget. Here’s something to consider, which is cheaper & healthier than any other diet I’ve come access. The Loophole Shake. I’d bet your family would love it too, and love how they feel having eaten it. If you desire to exercise but struggle with consistently....do the smallest amount possible. Put earbuds & music on, for example. Then, do cardio, only intending to do 5 minutes. If it’s feeling good & you want to continue, continue. I believe you’ll find it’s more of a ‘head game’ to be one by taking it one step at a time. Once we get moving, it feels good and we tend to keep moving. Having a dreamboard with all that you are wanting on it can be deeply inspiring for things like exercise. I suspect your back pain was due to strengthening some muscles but not the back. It’s important to evenly distribute the strengthening of muscles through out the body. Eating foods which bloat the stomach can also be a culprit. Yes! A few days off for self love is always a great idea. Honestly, I feel that you’re in far better mental shape than you’re giving credit. I had no trouble reading what you wrote at all. I notice you are second guessing yourself. With your self love time off, I’d meditation in the morning, and then inspect thoughts, in terms of ‘feels good’ and ‘doesn’t feel good’. Fill your dreamboard with thoughts that feel good, things & experiences you want in this life. Then, you have a vision going for your life. When thoughts arise, it becomes very easily to see they are either aligned with your wanting, or they are not. When a thought doesn’t feel good, don’t ‘make a story or diagnoses’ about yourself - just work with that one thought. Pick a better feeling thought. Let feeling be the leader, and be willing to be flexible in letting old not good feeling thoughts go, and choosing a better feeling thought. It all adds up over time. This is a fun ‘thought game’. It feels better, and better, and better. I’m very excited for you and I think you’re doing really great! Where you’re at now, being sincere and addressing this, inspecting it - you should feel really great about it!

@Amit Nailed it. ♥️

There are many veils to involve another in one’s own purification, alas, another is the veil.

@Hotaka “My mind” Is a thought.

@actualizing25 Truth isn’t reached per se, it’s uncovered. It’s 100% up to you now, and it’s always now.

@Dua I read your post and I am feeling motivated to do Meditation as I think I can help me. Yes you can indeed! I’d look to meditation as not so much a motivation to get somewhere or fix anything, but more a calling to come back home, prior to all of the experiencing, all the phenomena, all the activity & concerns. A completeletting go, without exception. This would be most helpful, paradoxically, because it is a break from the thinking there is something wrong with you which then ‘needs’ to be helped / fixed. What stands to be let go, is what is prior to the rls. Understand this simply as much as you do without assuming anything is being missed, be open to this, but yet at the same time, do not make meditation out to be something that will “fix” this, but rather, a break from it, relief from it, some peace and healing in regard to it, by letting it go. “Let thought go”, indirectly, as just a byproduct of being attentive to hearing, breathing & feeling, like you never have before. Like, you have heard of chocolate bars before, but now you’re going to explore Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory. There is great wonder to be experienced in hearing, breathing, and feeling. WAY more than there is in thinking. By letting go of the thinking of the world, the world reveals it’s wonder. Leave all the “life stuff” behind in meditation. Viscerally explore the other-than-thinking, of hearing, breathing & feeling. Let go of the body, and let go of the body within the body, again and again. Let go to the bone. Then let the bones go. Like an Olympic runner is set on running fastest, you set on letting go and relaxing deepest. Complete opposite. No incentive, no effort, no goal. See how deeply you can let go, how deeply you can relax. Olympic “level” of letting go. Let go more than any one ever has, ever. Not to gain anything - just to relax. It can be helpful initially, to make two precise labels / categories: ALL experience of living, the entirety of it, is: “Everythingness”....but meditation does not go in that label / category....meditation is: “Nothingness”. Meditation is not like Everythingness. There are no matters of concern in meditation, no thing to be fixed or solved. It’s a break from Everythingness, and everythingness includes everything. Meditation will not “fix” anything. But wouldn’t it be great to have total clarity on the rls? In meditation, that is, in letting go...Everythingness is let go, and Nothingness is more pronounced, more present if you will. This Nothingness, this Emptiness, is clarity. Literally. So if clarity is desired, letting go is the way. I tried meditation before as I know it really helps but my problem is whenever I sit for meditation Restless Leg syndrom kicks in.. and I can't sit still, can't keep my sitting posture for long.. RLS becomes worst as my body gets into the state of relaxation.. It happened 90% of times.. I’d see a doctor and get a physical with a full blood work up, specifically checking iron. Let the dr know all medications and substances in your system, so they can deduce any interactions that might be going on. Then I would consider that the rls arises when you meditate because there is a response from the nervous system to ’get up and go’...as not to feel what might be coming. It could be that there is a belief something is going to be ‘faced’ in meditation. Something from the past perhaps, a ‘having learned to run’, or ‘avoid’, to cope. Perhaps someone passed unexpectedly, and there are ideas of and fear of death maybe, hard to say. What is inevitably seen via letting go / meditation, is that the pure nature of this experience, is not a past, nor is any thing scary coming, including “death:...there is only but thoughts about things, arising, now. The experience of the relationship between feeling and the past changes over time in accordance with the seeing that there is no past, and that “it”, is but a thought, arising now. This is to “let go” and “realize the now”, or, to directly experience presence, mindfulness, or “this peace” as Mooji says. Feeling + past is very very different than feeling + a thought (About a past). Again, it takes a while to realize this, but meditation is not about realizing anything, it’s just letting go of everything. Realization is not like training for the Olympics...realization occurs when thought is let go (by focusing on hearing, breathing & feeling). Listen to the body, - it is the teacher. Like it is the infinite intelligence that it is. Stop “not liking how it feels” - and starting humbly listening to what it is “saying” to you. Wiggle your fingers, and then try to explain how “you did” it, and you’ll see what I’m pointing to. See what the body is doing with regard to rls, and ask “what is it telling me here? What is it subtly teaching me? What can I learn here?” Such inquiry as this, will pair with what you read in your dream journal. Lighten up, drop any seriousness. This place is a game. Reality showers you with what you want, and do not resist. Reality is unconditional, you hold, or don’t hold, conditions. If you resist / hold conditions, reality showers you in clues regarding well being & letting go. I am not insightful, nor enlightened, nor awake, nor anything but parallel, we’re in the exact same boat. I am only one such clue, coming & going in your adventure. You can pretend to control this adventure, you can project subjectivity onto ’me’ - or you can experience this gift for you that is this miracle of your life, humbly in the front row seat of living it. Always up to you. Don’t assess me...feel....this message resonates, or it doesn’t. Love the body, and allow it to release emotion. Of habit, thought attempts again and again to weave a story out of the arising emotional release. This is thought “trying to control the body”, acting preventatively to the body releasing. It is an act of innocent defense. For example, a thought could arise about the past, and feeling begins flushing the body of misunderstanding / emotion...but then the feeling of that flushing gets labeled as “bad” or “uncomfortable” - in / by, thought - and is suppressed. When this occurs - simply return to hearing, breathing, & feeling. Thought will kick it up a notch, attempting to convince you “something’s wrong”.... When this occurs - simply return to hearing, breathing, & feeling. Thought will take it to the extreme. Thought will “empty both barrels”, become grandiose, wild, self important, projection indulgent.... When this occurs - simply return to hearing, breathing, & feeling. There is nothing to solve, nothing to figure out.... When this occurs - simply return to hearing, breathing, & feeling. When thought labels feeling - don’t believe the labels! When this occurs - simply return to hearing, breathing, & feeling. That is how sneaky thought is. Feeling is always accurate and is never, ever, wrong. This is the importance of letting thought go, and what is hopefully conveyed by all or any of the words (above). Please keep in mind, when I say feeling, I am talking about that-there-is-feeling, pure sensation - I am not talking about emotions...when this occurs - simply return to hearing, breathing, & feeling. Peacefully allow this emptying out of the mind and body. Let it all go, and lovingly wish it well. Appreciate it all, it did serve you. In gratitude, allow it all safe passage up, and out. Love this way, that way, inward, outward, love all around. Love all that arises - do not label and judge. Don’t consider wether or not any facet of what arises is deserving of love, nor wether or not you have the capacity to love it - that is sneaky thought. Just love. No reason, no justifying it. Just love. Having said all that... if sitting meditation is ‘too much’, if it’s overwhelming...don’t ‘power through’ it. Break from it, and write about how you’re feeling in a journal, on actual paper, with a pen or pencil. If that is too overwhelming, do walking meditation, and then writing about how you feel. While walking, concentrate visually, straight ahead. Notice thoughts arising, and return attention to seeing, straight ahead. Known that this concentrating ‘outward’, will allow the source ‘within’ to ‘rise up within’, and thus clear out anything emotionally speaking, which is a ‘blockage’ in terms of, concentration. Have a good look around while walking. That is what it looks like when the infinite being you truly are, concentrates itself. Hear the birds. They’re singing to you. Their song is otherwise purposeless, though thoughts arise. Let them go, to feel the song. Also, you can practice walking meditation, and by focusing on all other-than thinking (seeing, hearing, breathing, feeling)....there is peace, and it is likely insights will arise. It can be most helpful and efficient to have your phone with you, and to voice-to-text the insights and save them. This way it is captured for later if you want it, but more importantly, in knowing it is captured, you easily readily ‘return’ to the other-than-thinking (seeing, hearing, breathing, feeling) / the peace. The ‘letting go’ / emptying ...’resumes’. Other times I got sleepy when I started meditation. Meditation is best first thing in the morning, right after ‘sleeping’. You might also try yoga, as it’s more physical and you’re less likely to get tired or sleepy. I’d google “the many types of yoga”, or something like that, and you’ll naturally attract some practices to experience directly. Also, consider keeping a dream journal next to your bed, and writing in it every morning wether there is a dream to log or not. If there was no dream, just write “no dream last night”. This builds the awareness of dreams, and dreams give you messages. The message is usually not clear upon awakening, but later, after the emotion has subsided, what you wrote in the journal can be suddenly very clear and insightful. Don’t assume linear time in this manor either. Something might occur in the ongoing of your day, and the dream suddenly ‘clicks’ as a major insight. Connecting with dreams btw, is connecting through intuition. Lots of awesome experience arises from this. Screen diet for sugar, caffeine, tobacco, alcohol, additives & preservatives, etc, and eating a low calorie nutrient dense diet, and not eating after 7 or 8 pm. I’d google ‘cleaning out the pineal gland’ too. The more choices the mind makes in the name of well being of the body, the better. Choosing well being is awakening. Also, are you sleeping at night, with the circadian cycle? (Vs working nights and sleeping during the day, or staying up late & sleeping in). For what it’s worth, if you aren’t...you would likely get a better night’s sleep if you slept naked, in 69 degrees or less (with a blanket), and avoid using screens at night in bed. Read a book, or write, instead. Exercise, specifically aerobic or cardio, and weight resistance / weight lifting, would likely help a lot. Doesn’t need to be anything major, just enough to change the percentage of fat & muscle a little. This can ‘awaken’ the tiny subtle ‘muscles’ prior to ‘the muscles’. At the very least, deep stretching and breathing into the stretches a few times a day. You might already be doing all or some of this, idk. I am totally hopeless now.. Beliefs like that are let go in meditation. You’re fine. Everything is fine. Don’t suppress desire, express desire. Meditation is the way. It’s wholly counter logical (logic = Everythingness), and presently counterintuitive in your experience (ya could use more Nothingness, which brings intuition and awesomeness to your life & experience). It will become crystal clear that meditation is always the ’answer’, because you define there is a problem, and then you claim you are ‘stuck’. In meditation, all is let go, and clarity arises where a ‘problem’ was believed to be. There are likely substances and or choices of diet at play, which were adopted to cope with the feeling, which was labeled In misunderstanding, and which there wasn’t anything ‘wrong’ with in the first place. Totally not your fault though. We believe what we are taught to believe. BUT then we meditate, and let all that nonsense go. You’re not really stuck. This is classic writer’s block and it is a tricky facade. You’re creating the ‘stuckness’, but aren’t yet aware of how / what you’re doing to create it. In the misunderstanding, a thought, “like a loser” arises. This is a thought which labels feeling, and identifies with that labeling. This is believing a thought and weaving an identity out of thought, so ‘you’ can be right about the feeling being wrong. But feeling is infinitely ‘right’ , pure goodness... and the thoughts & beliefs are not in alignment with feeling. Hopefully you’re connecting the dots here, and realizing meditation is the way. Letting go, is the way. Thought is just, thought. You are not a writer, there is an experience of writing. Writing can never be good or bad, there is an experience of judging, critiquing. You’re ‘pushing feeling out of the writing’...by labeling feeling & identifying with the label, yet feeling is what most behooves writing. Feeling is not a separate ‘thing’ from the experience of, writing. Again, before any writing occurs....wiggle those fingers first, explain precisely how ‘the writer’ is doing that, and you’ll find you can not, because there is no writer. Go ‘the other way’. Don’t “just do it”. Relax, hear, breathe, feel. Feel within the body, like the whole body is a sensory antenna, ‘picking up’ all the feeling, all the writing. The best thing you could do, imo, is drop the whole writing thing. Completely drop it. If you feel inspired to write, then do so. Otherwise, just let it go. Put the outcome of it ahead of your enjoyment of it - and it’s lost. Let it go for a while. This entire experience, this entire universe, is precisely as it appears - completely relative - to you. It’s literally a gift for you. The experience of writing, is not something ‘you have to do’ - it’s experience you get to enjoy. Thinking like “there is a problem with me” IS the “problem”. As such - there really isn’t a problem. You’re believing the thoughts “that there is a problem”. Nothing is wrong with you. “Wrong” is only a judgement, a thought. Judgmental thoughts do not feel good. Let. Them. Go. You wouldn’t hold a burning hot coal in your hand, would you? No. You’d let it go, because it doesn’t feel good. In kind, on the path, we let go of pride, arrogance, being right, being separate, resentments, entitlement, expectations, etc. We forgive. We apologize. We love. We self love. We understand. We feel passion, creativity, empowerment, enthusiasm. If a thought doesn’t feel good to you - you can let it go. (Shift awareness to seeing, hearing, breathing, & feeling). Also, for writing, consider dropping all devices, sitting in nature, and using a pad of paper and pencil. Don’t write for your blog though - write about what you are seeing now, write about what you are hearing now, write about what you are feeling now. ”I feel” is a sneaky thought. You can’t feel. You can’t even feel a feeling. Feeling IS. Like perception, there is no story to it. “Story”, occurs in thought. Not feeling. Not perception. The thoughts “I am weak physically” & “I am weak physically” do not feel good because they aren’t true. You’re telling that story. Don’t be surprised that is what you’re experiencing. Tell the story you actually want to experience, and miraculously, you do. “I need” is a sneaky thought. It’s in plain view though - if you listen to feeling. Anything that follows “I need” will not feel good. Let the thought go. (Focus on seeing, hearing, breathing, & feeling). Notice a thought arose, and it was in discord with feeling. Then, to “cover it up”....you start believing you must ‘need’ something. Emotional suppression doesn’t settle. Let it out. Temperature’s just right. Appreciate it. Consider the odds of there being temperature which “just happens” to be perfect to allow for this entire experience. There are no coincidences. It’s not random. Let thoughts of that nature go, and synchronicity & serendipity are revealed. This place is pure magic, and you can do anything you dream up - and you’re current sentiment is “hot weather bothers me”. Let go. Let go. Let go. I say this with love, and good intention, and I hope it is heard that way...you are holding many conditions for you to be happy. Happiness is revealed in letting those conditions go. Go experience that which you ‘fear’, and you will see the facade of fear. “Fear” is a label upon the experience of believing a thought about a potential future, which is in discord with feeling. Feeling will never be in “a future”. Feeling is present now. Feeling can be ‘listened to’, now. The mind wanders, false thoughts arise, feeling says “no sir, that’s not actual”....and you label feeling. This is very much like putting an address into the navigation app in your phone to get to where you want to go....and then when the voice says “in half a mile, turn left”....and you’re like “no!”. Relaxed, emptied, clarity arises. There will be no more thought being believed about yourself being “a loser”, ”I can’t”, etc. I’d read The Six Pillars Of Self Esteem, and Ask & It Is Given. I’d also start a dreamboard.

What Leo said is where I was headed. Sit and all urges come and go... And the true nature of desire is known, and that there is not fear is known.

@LfcCharlie4 With @Raptorsin7. Thanks, and again, spot on. ‘Channeling’ was / is precursor experientially speaking, and it took about 3 days to think straight again. ? Second time, maybe 1 & 1/2. Once a week would probably be better for a while. Appreciate the kind words, but I’m just havin the most fun I can, like you. Rock that dreamboard mate ✊?

@28 cm unbuffed I mean, the inquiry of your luck, is different than the inquiry of your luck in comparison to others luck. Imo, you had it right on in your op.

@Raptorsin7 Hey now!!