Ry4n

I'm so glad one of the OG's of this forum has returned lol, feeling very nostalgic rn

I love that

this is by far the most underrated point in this entire forum, it's literally the source of the forum's obsession with solipsism. All practicality gets thrown out the window into spiritual mental masturbation, and so many people here have been left totally confused and stuck in the contents of their finite mind, believing there's nothing more to it than that. It's kinda sad.

meditation and yoga first my dude, most egos need to be relaxed and open before they temporarily die (with love, no need to hate the ego). Don't think that there's some big insight at the end with psychs that'll fix all your problems and be your salvation, this truly is something that comes from inside of you, not from the drug itself (although this can be hard to see at first) I've had some serious connection with God from yoga/meditation alone and I'm not special at all. You cannot spiritually bypass your problems with psychedelics or any spiritual technique for that matter. I would work on this stuff first before even thinking about psychedelics. Something like LSD is quite energising so I would urge holding off for a bit until you've tamed your mind, body and energetic system. Anxiety is something that ultimately the ego is holding onto, even if it feels like one is trying to push it away, that's only exacerbating it. Allowing and accepting it so radically that even the resistance of it is allowed (whilst maintaining mindfulness) will help said energy to flow through you better, rather than fighting with it that causes it to be "stuck" in a way if that makes sense. Not only will it leave you quicker, but the experience of it won't seem nearly as bad. Adyashanti has some amazing meditations that can really relax a lot of the ego's fears and defences. So yea sorry to be your mom lol but I used to be a very anxious person myself and the trips I had then were not good nor even beneficial (thank god I took a break at the time) but as soon as I was in a better place the subsequent trips were amazing and I'm still integrating those lessons because of how powerful they were. There's seriously no rush with this stuff, and if you're going into the experience with all these expectations of it transforming you completely in one hit, you're gonna walk away disappointed assuming the experience hasn't completely overwhelmed you. Honestly if you're going to do anything judging by your post I would actually look into MDMA right now rather than psychedelics, such a drug can show you how to relax and open up and I think this is your best starting point before diving into a deeply profound trip. Good luck @Richard Purdy

totally normal dude, try to open yourself up to experience anxiety as you breath through it and show compassion to it (and yourself) and remain present, all the while not judging yourself for such an experience or thinking you are weak for it. This is all a process, none of us are where we want to be. Compassion as an actual daily practice makes so much of a difference.

The loud silence sounds exactly like my meditation experiences, it's so silent that it's powerful, unperturbed by anything, allowing everything. I would say (as flakey as this sounds) to simply feel your way into whatever mental space that is and to fully and completely surrender to it, allowing everything including the fear.

Hmmm, sounds more like depersonalisation actually. Maybe try taking a break from all this stuff for a while if you're able to, sorry to hear about this.

Highly agree with this take, the flippancy of some comments is inherently dangerous and breeds a kind of know it all attitude that ain't healthy. I would also add that honouring the relative is severely lacking in the spiritual side of this community, almost to the point of using the absolute POV as a copout, which is also dangerous and breeds Zen devils.

@dflores321 "The club of no one" hahaha @Leo Gura Being God/nothingness for a while has made me appreciate being human with all its suffering so much more. I'm not sure going all the way is right anymore if it means never coming back to this relative game, isn't that what death is for anyway? I guess everyone's path is different. @TheAvatarState Loving kindness is so important on this path, God is alone in its infinite love, and as humans we are united in that aloneness. There's a narcissistic aloneness that makes you feel alien and separated, and there's a selfless aloneness that is intimately connected with all. When you look at another human being you're looking at a literal manifestation of God, which is much more profound then just a fleshy robotic meat suit I think.

"the seekers ignorance must be destroyed with the machine gun of truth" wtf lol

100%, LSD was my first real glimpse into source and it hit me so hard that a year n a half later I'm still integrating.

Ketamine gave me a similar "experience". Upon exiting the "being" space/void the universe/form becomes nothing more than pure mind. Crazy stuff. Meditation is currently getting me back to that, like the door has been opened to it now. Good stuff dude.

agreed

I fucking love that

Yes I just copy and paste the link usually works to bring up the thumbnail

"your/my pov" is still imaginary. That's still ego, in fact experience isn't possible without ego. No self, no other, nobody is absolute. All experience is relative. A point of view requires a subject, which automatically creates an other. Instead getting hung up on this I would focus on realising that quite literally anything that can be experienced including the sensation of being a self with awareness is all part of the dream, all imaginary, all ultimately empty pure loving unlimited consciousness. Which is nice but....after a while that gets boring. Hence here you are.

The lowest point can be a portal to the highest one. Or at least it can be. I think it was adyashanti that described it as a limbo zone that proceeds God/Spirit. This really only applies to the meditative path though, psychedelics take you straight to source but it's not the full picture IMO. I feel like both you guys could learn a lot from each other. Or I'm just full of shit lol. Yes! omg I know we need a live discussion between the two.

It's usually the love aspect of GOD or the peace aspect of emptiness that keeps me here. Waking up doesn't have to always be some big explosion of madness, a lot of the time it's just a genuine letting go of attachment into a peace state of non-attachment, as if you were slipping into a warm bath made of tranquil love and acceptance. Getting too hung up on theories and concepts can cause this sort of existential despair, because that conceptual world in your mind is the ego's homeland, it thrives in these mental states, which is why I think too much intellectual contemplation can become an issue. Some of it can take you closer but too much takes you away into confusion. At this stage I would just completely let go of the whole idea of becoming enlightened or trying to understand and just sit and be. I honestly feel like you're making better progress than you realise; I remember hitting a wall at a certain point where the only thing keeping from progressing was my inability to let go. It really was that simple. Like Leo said try to enjoy it more and non take it too seriously. A little relaxation goes a long way.

would love to hear your thoughts on it

I like that. Now time to fuck language off and meditate some more adyashanti style.

oh he's admitted to Duncan Trussell to having done em

What's being said here is a bit of tricky bitch lol, how I see it is that in understanding that all is a single consciousness, the very idea that there's anything but that is illusory. So from that vantage point OF COURSE the present moment is all there is. When you look at a tree that is all there is, when you look at the sky that is all there is, because "tree" and "sky" is just consciousness, the distinctions made are merely illusory done for survival purposes. This is probably the most "absolute" of a perspective you could get sober. (But if we're speaking purely on relative terms then all the same rules apply.) I hope what I said there makes any fucking sense at all LOL.

Hmmm interesting, the Godhead doesn't seem like an experience at all though because that requires a subject to experience it; hence my belief why the illusion exists in the first place is for "it" to know itself. But I agree all "experience" is absolute truth in the sense that it is always just consciousness and literally nothing else 24/7. This could all just be a semantics problem though. All language is dualistic after all.

2 sides of the same coin; everything and nothing

hit the nail on the head right there dude