koyadr3

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Posts posted by koyadr3

  3. Posted

    58 minutes ago, aurum said:

    Dude, dating is an inherently a social activity. There is no success in dating without socializing. You might as well try to become a world-class swimmer while standing on dry land.

    You’re not dating a rock. You’re dating a human.

    If you don’t like people and don’t like having friends, that’s kind of a problem. And it’s probably not healthy.

    The whole point of being a social species is that we benefit from our social arrangements. That’s survival. 

    Granted, if you’ve had shitty friends in the past, that may have rightfully traumatized you. But from your description it sounds like your own insecurities more than anything else. You’re gonna have to deal with that.

    Damn I think I’m fucked for life

  6. Posted

    8 hours ago, vindicated erudite said:

    Pay for sexual services. You might have to travel to a red light district in order to do this safely. But once you've lost your virginity you're going to realise that intimacy is more important than the act of sex itself. After you realise this you should focus on creating emotional connection with the women you want to date. 

    Traveling to a shorter country might help with your height if you find that you get rejected to often because of it. 

    This is what's holding you back. Inject your presence into social situations that contain lots of women. Then you have to get into the habit of conversing with women without trying to hit on them. Use these experiences to learn how to communicate with women. Then when once you're confident approach women with romantic interests.

    I think you should create a personal rule to limit the amount of women advance to romantically to something like for every 10 women you make laugh romantically pursue one female. This is to keep your morale up when you romantically pursue women. Change the rule to fit you.

    Another thing you can in friend groups is saying something like you're single and looking for a long-term partner if the topic of relationships rise in the convo. 

    I'm assuming that you're in a Muslim conservative country (correct me if I'm wrong), if I'm along the lines that you'll just have to follow the advice in blue when in conversations with male elders.

    Also you can do the obvious stuff like hit the gym and work on your career.

     

    I would never pay for sex and no I live in belgium It's just that cold approaching a girl is weird like how is it socially acceptable…? I'm going to seen as a creep

  7. Posted

    12 hours ago, aurum said:

    Are you in school somewhere?

    At age 19, you should just be focused on making friends. That’s how most people your age will date and find someone.

    The reality is you need more social experience. That’s the key. How you do that is mostly irrelevant as long as it’s ethical.

    Yes, life is hard.

    If you are actually suicidal, seek professional help.

    Otherwise, this is an insecurity you going to have to face and deprogram. This may be a long process.

    5’1 might make things harder for you. But it’s not at all hopeless if you’re looking for a partner. 

    Well then you may need to create some opportunities. Maybe you need to move. Maybe you need to pick up a hobby. Or get a new job. Whatever.

    Passivity and helplessness will not solve this problem. Or really any problem in life.

    You don’t need to do cold approach. You need friends. There are many ways to meet people. Notice that 99% of people have never done cold approach and yet most of them still have a social life.

    And that’s why you need more social experience.

    Notice that feeling helpless about this paralyzes you from taking action, which leads to you not gaining experience, which then leads to you feeling clueless, which then leads to you feeling helpless around taking action, and on and on the loop goes…

    Break the loop.

    But I don't like having friends I'd rather be alone than have friends I used to have friends, but I left them, because I couldn't stand them I feel so inferior compared to them and jealous, envy I compare myself to them and I feel inferior… Is this really the only way to get laid or get a girlfriend…? Because I truly hate having friends

  9. Posted

    Hey, I'm a 19-year-old young man who wants to get laid desperately, Recently all I think about is sex and women, It's dominating my psyche I can't even focus on the stuff I used to love to do, like being creative and working on my projects

    It's sucks because I don't want to deal with this... I'm an introvert, I have social anxiety, and I'm insecure because of my height (I'm 5ft1 it's extremely short, and It also makes me suicidal because of it) the problem also with my dating life is I don't know the fuck how to get laid like I have zero opportunities to meet women and even If I do, I still don't feel good enough to talk to girls because of my height and even If I do somehow feel good enough I still would never cold approach a girl this just seems crazy to me, and It's not socially accepted where I live

    I have no clue how to talk to girls I heard being nice does not work, so I don't know how to act, there are so many obstacles that feel impossible to overcome I feel lost, and I still think I will never be able to get laid just because of my height

  15. Posted

    Hey guys, I'm a former ex Muslim I stopped believing in God 3 years ago with a friend (It’s weird l know) and now I want to stop and believe in God again because of some issues in my family…

    Guys I'm doing this for my family I can say you otherwise they’re going to be disappointed In me guys… and I don’t want that :(

    So I’m asking If anyone can help me?…

  16. Posted

    I hate being an introvert, I think it's ruining my life, and when I talk about getting rid of my introversion, I'm not talking about being shy or having social anxiety no, no, no

    I'm talking about being easily exhausted by social interactions, having to recharge batteries every time, having no interest to socialize, being a low energy person, I hate it!!!

    Like, how does people have so much energy and not me?? Honestly, why I am like this??? Is there a way to get rid of it?? I feel if I were an extravert my life would be so much better, I would finally have interest with socializing with people, and I'm pretty sure It would give me so much more opportunities in life

  18. Posted

    17 hours ago, Yarco said:

    Give yourself time to be creative. You need to set aside time to just brainstorm and daydream, like a 1-hour chunk of time where you just list out ideas. Whether it's ideas for a story, possibly new inventions, song lyrics, or whatever else.

    My guess is you only allow yourself to be creative when you're bored while doing nothing or operating on autopilot. It's something that you do when you have time left over. Make it a priority and give it a dedicated space instead.

    Otherwise it's like only allowing yourself to learn coding while you're waiting for a bus

    Okay, I will thank you!!

    8 hours ago, herghly said:

    @koyadr3 Read "Steal Like An Artist" 

    I will take a look, thanks!!

  19. Posted

    Hi guys!!! I'm looking for ways or techniques to be more creative.

    At first, I searched at Leo's YouTube channel to see if he had a video on the subject, but I couldn't find one.

    I don't know if there is one, but I couldn't find it. So I came here to ask if you guys have any ways or techniques to share to be more creative.

    So far, I've noticed that the few times I'm creative or have new ideas is when I'm having lucid dreams or sitting around doing nothing, or when I'm doing things like autopilot tasks like cleaning, chores, etc.