Sincerity

Watched it with my family and liked it. Also I interpreted the ending the same way as You. Sometimes the delivery of the dialogue (or maybe the dialogue itself) felt a bit off to me but overall it was good. I found a lot of meaning in it.

Well, at least now You're honest what it is to You.

I literally burst out laughing. ? Dude, don't subscribe to anything. How many times have You been advised on this forum to rely on direct experience? It's your truth of the moment that other people exist. Fine. But if You immersed yourself in Presence enough You could realize what all of this is. It's You, lol. And there's nothing besides You.

Once again I've awakened. No one will hear me... Even I won't hear me. Cause there is no "me". * But nobody came. I am so empty. My Dream is all these is... It's nothing, it's beautiful, it's meaningless. It IS what it IS. I am the Dreamer that doesn't exist, just Dreaming of what I am... A Dream of My Infinite Potential. A REALIZATION of It. Infinite Potential Actualized through Dreaming. I'm feeling sad. I don't even know why, but that's what IS right now. I just want to cry... But I have to contemplate further or I wouldn't be "myself". Fuck.

Interesting. I understand what You're asking. I would say yes, since to be God = to be what IS, NOW. Even though the finite may not recognize itself, what it IS remains unchanged. Its truth of the moment may vary --> "I am limited, I am a being, I am different from God". And yet this truth of the moment can only be experienced because Experience IS the case.

Lately I've been dealing with interesting thoughts. "I wanna burn myself to the ground. I want there to be nothing left of me." "I've been thinking about my endgame in life. How about I go fight in the war that I think might be coming? Until now I've always thought that in case of war, I'm gonna run away with my family to Germany. But now I think to myself... well, why not fight in the war? I'm gonna learn a lot about life and if I die, then fucking what? It doesn't matter anyway after all! I CAN DO ANYTHING!" "I'm gonna learn a lot of money til I'm about 40 and then buy a cabin in the woods near a lake (somewhere relatively close to a small town, but also secluded) and do 5-MeO, salvia and all that stuff there so that I break myself completely. Effectively I would go for my death." "I want to get punched in the face someday. I want to go fight in the war. I want to go to jail and get raped there." "What if I could transcend this "realm" and live an entirely different existence? What if I could go beyond all these limitations by becoming ultra conscious? Nobody is gonna tell me about this possibility because I'm all there fucking is. "They" wouldn't fucking know. What if I could become SO CONSCIOUS that limits are no longer imagined & I really TRANSCEND all of this?" "As God, I can literally experience ANYTHING. Couldn't I go beyond to a "higher plane" with absurd consciousness? Couldn't I be an Angel, for example? I want to be an Angel." Right now I'm in a calmer state and so I can't express these with the same "craziness", really... But also I've got some notes from when I really was in a somewhat unhinged state and here are some of them... "Fuck safety precautions. Stop pretending you are wise and cautious and admit you are scared like a baby. You are completely full of shit, you are not serious, you are just procrastinating on the overcoming of fear. YOU COULD KNOW RIGHT NOW! It doesn't matter what they fucking say. Everyone telling you nooo don't kill yourself, don't do it etc. etc. They are fucking scared, is all." "I'm gonna stab you to death when you're not around. I'm gonna fucking stab you, you roach. You are pathetic. You are this scared little shit frightened of losing your precious mod position and account on the forum. You are scared of challenging people. You are scared of leaving it all. Fucking look at yourself, you're disgusting. You could be overcoming fear right now but no, you're attached to these animals chattering about shit. PEOPLE ARE ANIMALS PLAYING THEIR GAMES. THEY KNOW NOTHING! And even though they're bullshitters, you're still siding with them. That makes you a bullshitter." "You are a coward and a fool. You are worthless. Just fucking die already." I've been having this inner talk for some time now. Today it's gotten stronger, I became more conscious of it and dug into what's behind it. More on that in a bit. For now, here's my response to myself. I find that it's really useful to split myself in half sometimes and engage in dialogue. One side is this unhinged, angry passion and the other side is calm and reasonable wisdom, let's say, You were supposed to surrender to God, instead of growing your egoic passion and will. Look at what You're doing. This is the opposite of surrender and I'd suggest this is being a devil. Do You honestly think a "highly conscious" being would see "others" as "animals"? Only "animals" see "animals", to use your logic. Be careful, because You are on a path to devilry and falsehood. If You surrendered yourself to Intuition, all would be okay. You don't need to enact your will on the world. Have You forgotten that? You can simply BE and be aligned with God in this way. This would (most likely) be the greatest existence. Don't abuse the power You've learned. Fearlessness can go into your head. It's NOT spiritual work to go commit crime intentionally and go to jail. Or go fight in a war for some reason. Don't prove things to yourself. Don't do unreasonable shit. Of course nothing matters, but that's no excuse to act in an unhinged way! Seriously, notice how it's all gotten to your head, please! Examine your motivations! Living aligned with Intuition will be far better than acting on these egoic drives. Can't You see that You've become bitter? Yeah, You can still appreciate the beauty of reality and all that, but there's also anger involved and I'd say it's coming from an untrue place. Being reasonable isn't any truer than being unreasonable... but also it kind of is. Please, don't fall off the path. You've come so far. Notes and insights. I am the devil. I feel like today the devil was speaking through me. And I've got some deeper insight into what the devil even is. See, the devil is me. I am the devil. THE DEVIL IS PERFECTLY DISGUISED AS ME. It's fucking brilliant. It's perfect! There is no guy with a pitchfork out there, there is no outside evil, there is ME! The disguise is so good because it is infinitely customized to me. It's designed so intelligently it's unimaginable, truly the work of a genius. I use all of my emotional points, charged memories and thoughts filled with meaning to stay "alive". Whatever I find meaning in I utilize to keep myself here. I find I do this very much through interpreting the stories and motifs in my favourite video games, TV shows and movies. Also obviously my memories from interacting with people and all that. One of the most intelligent aspects of devilry is that I will use all my "knowledge" of God, memories from awakenings and interpretations of them to further build my card castle... BUT IN A MUCH MORE SUBTLE WAY. It's so fucking subtle! Amazing. It should have been obvious to me, but the devil will TWIST the truth into devilry and falsehood... and the rhetoric may still include words like God, Love and all that! Devilry also gets more difficult to distinguish when I am still able to access some higher states in spite of it. I can be mesmerized by the beauty of the world & highly conscious... and later the same day have thoughts like "I wanna go fight in the war and be shot in the face". And then be in a peaceful state again. It's tricky. These thoughts can be perceived as "truthful" because I'm not really feeling any "negative consequences". With some of these thoughts there's anger involved, but it doesn't really feel bad tho. I thought that maybe that it's righteous anger and thus it's okay... ehh, I don't know. All of this is tricky territory and I'm learning to navigate it on the go. I especially want to make sure that I don't fall into a dark path - that'd be a bit of a shame. I can do so much more. Or maybe someday "I" could do nothing at all... Why should we care for what they're selling us anyway...?

Thanks! Very grateful to hear You find my shit worthy of consideration.

I don't know if it's just me, but I sense your words here are brimming with profound peace, compassion and understanding! ? "Well, look around. Life is astoundingly beautiful." --> God damn!!!! This one hit me the most. It's radiating peace!!!! Or maybe I'm going crazy. ? Be honest, did You take MDMA or what?! Hahaha

29/36. Also had to google a lot of the words. But I'm taking full responsibility for the score.

1) Of course You aren't always in a high state. Yeah, so? Even if You fall back, You still retain some (depends on You how much) of the wisdom, clarity and all the good stuff from the period in which You were in a high state. As the saying goes, a mind that is stretched by a new experience can never go back to its old dimensions. Again, that doesn't mean You're not gonna fall back to "sleep". But something always changes. I can say many things from experience. One example is that after a profound awakening over 3 weeks ago all of my addictions have been eradicated. I'm controlled much MUCH less by desire. This You will interesting, no-fap enthusiast: now I have almost no need to masturbate, simply because I'm not enchanted by desire. It's totally effortless to do no fap. But I still masturbate once a week out of "necessity", because I feel like my body needs to let it out so to say. Not to porn - I've cut it out completely. I didn't put any deliberate effort into quitting porn. Awakening/God-realization solved the "problem" for me (I didn't even consider it a problem, I was okay with it). And I'm not saying the addictions will NEVER come back, but You know, they haven't been there for almost a month and that's SOMETHING! That's a step! I have an "experience" which I won't ever forget, it's always gonna stay with me to a degree. 2) I didn't mean COMPLETELY fearless. In my view that's impossible (because fear goes to infinity). I meant more fearless, enough that You can feel truly free and satisfied in life. 3) No one disagrees with the importance of engagement with life. You can know You are God and handle relationship "issues", doing the dishes, learning a new skill, whatever. You will learn about life from everything. I found out how beautiful doing the daily chores is because of awakening. I mean, yeah, like with any pursuit. Though awakening/God-realization still helps with these, I would suggest. You're talking about egotism and misapplying human teachings, not God-realization itself. Btw, I don't consider myself awake. And I don't recognize Myself right now.

This "I am God" "nonsense" is what You ARE. Sounds like You just haven't realized You are God if You treat it that way. Now You can do anything! When You realize You are God You are so free, so whole, there is such clarity and fearlessness that You can pursue anything You want without inhibition. And any of this is "guaranteed" by what, exactly? God-realization enchances all of these points. ALL OF THEM. I can speak from experience. In fact with many of these pursuits God-realization (or awakening in general) is the surest way to bring You there. Mindfulness, goodness, wholeness, wisdom, love, benevolence, creativity, communication and maturity are all profoundly magnified by realizing what You truly are. No one disagrees with the importance of embodiment. You can embody the recognition that You are God and live from that place, aligned with the highest values. YOUR values. It'll be heaven on earth.

Since Gesundheit has been confirmed to be safe, I'm locking the thread now. We're glad You're okay, @Gesundheit2

Damn. Haven't seen a bait as good as this one in a really long time.

My results --> 0% hostile, 3% benevolent.

I'm not getting into these conversations with You. No point.

"Introspect." "Actually, it's feminism that is biased! Men and women are not equal! This forum doesn't get it!!!" ?‍♂️

I would be very careful with making such a statement, if I were You. Be honest with yourself at least. You posts contain a strong anti-feminist bias and yet You're acting like "this is just how reality is!". You don't have to make it an enemy. Examining it and looking for its source wouldn't hurt tho. Maybe these battles of yours would cease.

@mr_engineer Too much anti-feminist media consumption bro. ?‍♂️ Very unbiased.

Yup, we figured it out.

Well, I find that to go deep I need to be more still and concetrated. Also I'm more of a visual person and I like to see what I've written, think and then proceed onwards. And I like expressing my thoughts as eloquently as possible. I find that I can achieve that by writing and moreover I think that when doing it in such a "quality" and thoughtful way, the quality of my introspection increases. During these voice journalling walks I'm mostly chattering in a less focused way. Throwing stuff out. I find it valuable to do sometimes and I've done it over a hundred times already (literally). There's a place for everything. But yeah, to go deeper I usually go for contemplation with a journal. I haven't tried voice journalling while being still. Maybe there'd be some value to that, I dunno.

I've been doing that for a long time. Basically going on a walk and talking out loud about stuff while recording it, for about 30-60 minutes. I do it to get things off my chest. After I do it I never listen to the recording, I could as well delete all of them or not record at all. But I like to feel like I'm talking to someone. Also people are not weirded out because they think I'm talking to a friend over the phone. I recommend You try it. You can also use it to get better at talking, projecting your voice, etc. However I find that for "deeper thought", a written journal is much better.

That's what Intuition is for. "You" don't need to figure anything out. Just notice where Intuition is leading You and do that. It takes practice and genuine "spiritual work" tho. At first You can't easily distinguish Intuition from thoughts, emotions, fears and all the bullshit. And even when You distinguish it it's too frightening to follow up on it. But it gets easier. You can surrender so profoundly that Intuition is the sole decision-making force in your life. You just do stuff. Things happen. No effort required. No knowing of "what", "why" and "how" necessary... ...and not even possible. Reality is Incomprehensible (and any "part" of it too) and all You think You "know" is bullshit, basically. Still useful often times though. It's good You're feeling overwhelmed. Notice it. And SURRENDER to it!

Believing such would be a huge misunderstanding of Aloneness. There are no NPCs. All is Infinite Intelligence. All is Beauty. All is God. Both that and Aloneness can be true. Aloneness is not limiting in any way. It's just that Experience is all there is. Yeah, You can Imagine "another" and that's in fact how most "humans" see things (in the Dream ). God can be any state, which includes states where "other" is perceived and states where all is one. Still, it's always Oneness = God. And as it turns out, You ARE that Oneness. You are God. And no, I'm not pointing to the "you" as in a "local being". There is no "you". You are God = God is God = God IS = GOD. That's my 2 cents. I like your posts. Nice writing style.

Sorry, I couldn't restrain myself. Yes, it's a Dream.

I'm forgetting more and more with each day. I know it's natural, it's like the exhale part of the breath while the period of growth and expansion is the inhale. I see that I can focus on different things in this autopilot state that I'm starting to feel attracted to currently and I'm excited by that. Also I can't wait to see what the future brings. How am I going to feel when the inhale part comes back again in like 4 months or so? What is the state going to be like? And yet it hurts me a bit that I don't remember anymore. Yes, it hurts. I am being honest. From a "lower" state like this things are harder to accept. I'm still attempting it of course, that's what I feel like my work is about. And that's what I care about in life. But man... I don't know, I'm just sad right now. There's something beautiful in this too... ? I have a lot of insights about how this entire cycle works, why it is the way it is, what the value of this exhale/autopilot/conservatism phase is. But I'll mention it some other time maybe. I had a GREAT day today... and I'm tired. Please forgive me for whatever I do.. when I don't remember You... ??