Elton

8/2/2016-woke up on time little late but that didn't keep me from going back to sleep and waiting to wake up earlier tomorrow , exercised , meditated , went to work , didn't smoke yet and now i feel a certain type of emotional reaction instead of feeling integrity ... in my chest, interesting .... couple of things more and my routine will be complete... 9/2/2016-work up on time earlier , exercised for longer meditated went to work and then what happened ? the shadow took over. 10/2/2016-didn't wake up on time , managed to meditate , the dark energy is loosing its intensity. 12/2/2016- no routine :-( had gone for an interview. 18/2/16- so many days no routines... that makes me feel low on integrity.

this journal is over i'm starting a new one in which all these activities will be integrated

9/2/2016-As I read and learn content regarding finding my purpose i am getting few hints ... sometimes these hints feel so clear and sometimes too blur. Lets see if i can tap into my higher self , which means i have to let go of my lower self to me simply doing the right things and not doing the things that will sabotage me is being my higher self; could higher self have another meaning ? i don't know up-till now. 10/2/2016- future prediction for today , to read and to be inspired . 12/2/2016-no finding of life purpose today went for an interview where i have more financial growth. ummmm no i will read at least one page of one book. 18/2/16 tomorrow is the next round of my interview ... i have to go and take possession of my job tomorrow afternoon. 24/2/16 there will be a final presentation round very soon i have to go and take possession of my new job very soon.

this journal is over i'm starting a new one in which all these activities will be integrated

7/2/2016-The shadow is becoming darker and darker , there seems to be so much light of hope out here , so much light of hope inside. this light should reach ; the known and the unknown aspects within me within you . the energy must transform . using energy for energy ... using the energy i put in useless unwanted things that are not doing me any good perhaps leading to self destruction and ultimately world destruction... but how do i do this ? the shadow refuses to submit ... i'm creating my own thoughts , this can be viewed just as a concept or model just Being and taking the right action is what i should do . message to reality.... 'JUST BRING IT' even after writing all this i feel i'm going to go back to the shadow today maybe tomorrow might bring a light of hope ... :-( or maybe the evening oh man ..perfectionist attitude is ruining me :-( 9/2/2016- fell back into the dark today evening after one whole day that too in the evening also realized how willpower either is built up or down ! 10/2/2016- its so difficult to not change people try extra hard to be the same that is what i am doing :-/ 11/2/2016- job interview call was a massive trigger 12/2/2016-same massive trigger for going to my lower self. 18/2/2016- I don't need to wait for some perfect date and time, now is the Time to drop all my Addictions... Now is the Time. 20/2/16-still stuck in the groove. 24/2/16- still stuck but the time is very near , time to be healthy . 26/2/16- Time to face reality,to embrace it truely as it is to accept whatever comes with it,to be integrated with it,to feel the oneness the trueness, even the bitterness to smell the roses,to smell the pile of shit...time to live completely.(so shut the Fuck up and do it, thats when it really counts)

this journal is over i'm starting a new one in which all these activities will be integrated

8/2/2016-100 push ups 20 leg raises 100 squats 9/2/2016- 100 push ups 20 leg raises 100 squats (x2) 10/2/2016-Future set burpee max (5min) hahahaha 51 :-) 11/2/2016- 10 burpees 25 bur 10 bur 10 climbers 25 cli 10 climbers 10 high jumps 25 high jumps 10 high jumps + using dummy loadcells of 2.7 kgs when the boss was away Chest combo + shoulder combo + biseps combo + push ups + legs combo. 12/2/2016- rest day 18/2/16- full body combo with 5 kg 23/2/16- burpee max 5 min

this journal is over i'm starting a new one in which all these activities will be integrated

@Rahul yadav thats a thought an internal voice focus on that for some time and see what happens.

@DizIzMikey i always do it in the train its fun,I get a bonus of few more min to my med practice... People come and go and stare I look outside the window so I don't throw any boms at people...

@jes Read the book the power of the subconscious mind. Implement meditation focus on current reality

@MikeS worrying is a negative loop in your head which makes you stuck.you can worry about the past or the future so thats not being in the present, you can choose worry about something if you can take action on it otherwise it is useless.

@Huz88 yes check out Leo the artist.

@PeakPerformance i hope you are not falling asleep ;-) try keeping your back straight,sit on a chair initially for support let go of control of your thoughts and do nothing.

@rush im on board with this idea because I know this is going to be the best life, smelling the roses, but my mind comes up with a lot of stories which seems real,so first I want to become financially free, and start my own business then I will be free to apply this concept, also meditation will help me be more focus so that the little time I put in will give me massive productivity I want to do this Smelling the roses

@Mary you start by reducing TV time and doing some meditation work, the images and thoughts you see hear and feel will be much more entertaining than t.v. ;-) and maybe if you are lucky you will realise how you are not real too just like your t.v.series

@Mary your mind becomes free and your time becomes free, you can find your true values easily as t.v. Corrupts them you become aware of mindless consumerism and how reality works,t.v. Is a series of endless climaxes.

@Kelley White @Natasha @Saarah @JustinS @Mal @Anna @charlie2dogs @DizIzMikey thank you soo much guys for I feel so good as I read all your comments :-)

@jes go to sleep very early and get up very early

@Leo Gura newtonian time says there is only limited time in the world, try following the Einsteinien std. Time it would be great for all Actualized.org followers... ;-)

@DrMatthewsausage a calm mind can grap things better than a tensed or anxious mind, I would study 2 days before the exam with a calm mind in 48 hours the whole earth moves around its self two times so thats a lot of time... just focus and try to eliminate distractions for a while, refer to previous years question papers and keep a positive mindset.

@IVONNE start making mimdset shifts from competitor to creator, You can keep studying till 102.. Or more if your still alive.

@IVONNE try classical music.

Finally homeostatic resistance has come back; to haunt me ... but since i'm aware , a lot more than i would be in the past, a lot more than i was a few years ago i'm not going to allow this to bother me , its just the millions........ and millions of years of programming that's limiting my success in my health , and in my personal development . The rock says is this, homeostasis ; in my code of subconscious your just a glitch it won't be long till you be my bitch ... cause at the main event , which is this Monday the rock is going to be champion again, he's going to rock bottom your monkey ass down to the fires of hell from which you may or may not rise again and if you do than bam! the rocks going layeth the smacketh down on your ass again and again till you lay there and do not wake up again ... do you really think that you can bring me down ? IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU THINK ! All you can do is be a passive observer homeostasis all you can do is keep on looking ,and from tonight you will smell what the rock is cooking ! ( one eyebrow raises)

I believe that I'm not religious, but what does the blue stage have to say? It says that the ego goes from self to others and because its written in the book its true the book is right and everything else is wrong. I feel that's what I'm doing with personal development, its almost like Leo is the priest ; the material is the bible and because its written in there its true...its about others too.. So what would stage orange of personality development look like? Any thoughts????