caspex

I have had the same experience lying in my bed one afternoon. However instead of being gently sucked backwards, I suddenly fell backwards and got submerged in this thick veil. I was aware of my physical body but all my senses had been retracted to some purely auditory realm. There I could feel the presence of two entities, and one of them introduced itself as 'Smith', a very common human name. It was surreal and felt VERY real. It was not a dream or my imagination. I was too shocked at the moment so I didn't actually talk to them about anything, after a while of not saying anything, I gently floated back up into my body and gained control and the heavy veil was lifted. At the time I didn't think of it as aliens but after reading your post it could very well be.

That's nice. More time for spirituality. I am not quite sure how it'd work considering I'd have to regularly take the anti-aging medicine, but I'd like to continue a spiritual practice for at least 100 years, considering I'll be living indefinitely. With time not being an issue anymore, I'd meditate to my hearts content.

If you keep a journal about it I'd greatly appreciate it.

It took me some time but I achieved it sober so it was a gradual process for me. I don't have access to psychedelics, if I did I'd probably have experienced it that way. My experience has been very gradual as stated above. The first time I simply placed attention over my 'self', it only lasted a fraction of a second. It was hard to keep but I kept trying until I was able to sustain it. It was only half a minute of sustained attention but I felt something crack, as if glass breaking or cracks appearing in stone, right where the pineal gland sits. It was a very physical sensation and sound. This got me hooked and I started meditating frequently on 'I AM'. One night I decided to say fuck it all and sat down around 11 PM or 12 AM on my bed and started mediating. I told myself that I am not getting up until I deconstruct my ego. My experience at that point was that I had an idea that the self is layered, but not to what extent. It was around 5 AM when the kernal finally broke off. Everything I thought, the shock, the novelty of experience, all felt amazing, and it didn't feel like it was happening to a 'me'. It was just happening, like a rock sitting on grass. I almost panicked thinking I had finally lost it, the articles on the internet didn't help telling me I was disassociating. This experience has only gotten deeper since and I have been able to understand many more breakthrough nuanced and degrees to that simple experience. At some point I went beyond the whole "I am a witness" phase. It doesn't look like it but the witness is also ego. Very sneaky. People get this false idea that just because they detached from their life, personality and behaviors, they have achieved ego death. If you still feel like you are observing it all, there's still a you. It was in a similar fashion in one meditation where I broke through the witness and it was the most freeing. The best way to describe it is that it went from a cone of perception to a 360 Sphere of perception in which every point is the center. There's also cool variations where you can experience headlessness, or whole bodylessness for that matter, but I don't really consider that ego death. But it is indeed disidentification with the body. It feels genuinely like you are floating. Not in air, but that you are air itself. Even while looking at your body, you wouldn't think it's yours. It gets really powerful if you combine it all together. You disappear and forget everything. Time doesn't exist, people don't exist. What's occurring is simply occurring. But it's not 'occurring', it's more like an 'occur' is that makes any sense. There's no sense of continuity. I can produce these states at will but it depends on my mood and motivation how fast I can do it. Goes from a few seconds to a few minutes. Still hard to make it my baseline.

We already feel in multiple dimensions. Why not just mix that up with thinking. Maybe that's what intuition is.

If you want, you should go all the way with your deconstruction. Why even say that God will imagine being everything? Just deconstruct that as well and say "this here is it, and nothing else." What you're saying seems almost as bad as believing in time and a self.

I have had some crazy ones, but not anything recently. I had one where I talked to a being, like literally voice to voice. Another where my ceiling turned into a tree with humans legs. There was a period where I used to see eyes and faces, very clearly, when I closed my eyes, even to blink. I don't know if this counts as a mystical experience but for a week or two now, my life has had a lot of synchronous phenomenon. Just now I was watching a Phineas and Ferb episode. When I finished it I glanced randomly over to a nearby house lizard. After observing it for a while, when I glanced back to the episode list, the next episode was titled "The Lizard Whisperer". I can't remember them specifically but yesterday two of such things happened in succession. It makes me curious why. It has been happening everyday at least once. If it gets any more connected than this then I might also be able to predict if something good or bad's gonna happen, y'know, like reading omens.

I think waiting is closely related to boredom and when one actively waits, that is without distracting themself, boredom arises. And boredom has the unique property of bringing out from within your psyche all the things you have been avoiding or suppressing. You can then work on these things and more unresolved conflicts would come up. It's like God gave you the easiest tool to integrate yourself, just be bored. You can also easily entertain yourself through thought experiments and stuff like that but I guess just don't do that. Waiting is 'almost' being present. Because it's mixed with anticipation.

If you purify yourself you won't hate others for their bullshit

I think if you are doing it once every few days it's fine, it depends on your body. I am a guy so I can only relate to you in terms of the dopamine peeks a human gets during orgasm. The way masturbation had taken away from my life was because of my addiction to that dopamine hit. So when my sexual urge was too low, I'd seek some other source of dopamine and this cycle would continue until I waste my whole day. So masturbation would simply make me an NPC since I did it too much. Obviously this wasn't a problem once I stopped doing it everyday, for me the right frequency was once every 5 days or more.

my bad. This post does have value

Loads of people educate themselves later in life, you shouldn't worry about that. Besides, 27 is still young. Sure there's a difference in ability to learn compared to your early 20s, but so what? You're not suddenly dumb, you are still very smart and capable of learning. In fact, if you really want to learn then there's not much that can stop you. What you should focus on is whether you really want to educate yourself or not, especially through academia. Once you enroll, be sure you'll complete it.

What works ime is changing who you are. Your emotions get triggered in social situations based on who you think you are. Developing habits and character that makes you gain trust and faith in yourself and your capabilities usually always helps with anxiety.

Why are we talking about someone behind their backs, especially when it doesn't provide any value? What's the point of this thread? To seek validation? A mega-thread for inauthenticity examples also seems wildly unproductive, considering that if you want to develop authenticity then you should make an Authenticity Examples Mega-Thread. A thread like this invites rants and gossiping.

It's like she's a doll or a Disney princess. The size of her hands and head in proportion to her body and each other is just perfect. The dress is great as well.

It's almost like you tune into a frequency and leave it on until you receive a message

I have fallen asleep consciously a bunch of times, as in, I have witnessed a few times the exact moment the 'falling asleep' happens. It's like you completely and utterly detach from the physical body and your normal thinking mind. There's also sometimes a very thick veil or the reality becomes denser as if you are underwater. The hallucinations are intense and reality is very flexible. Sometimes you get sucked into an entirely different world which could be purely auditory, visual or any other sense or a mix of senses. To answer your questions, I think to remember something you must be able to recreate it to some degree in your experience, but with most of your sleep, you are feeling and thinking in ways that is normally impossible for you to do. You connect dots that you never can awake. So when you are awake, you naturally cannot remember all of that. But you can if you train yourself. Yes awareness is present during sleep, even in deep sleep.

All of Aphex Twin

I like that reality is real. I like that it blooms to itself like a flower revealing its inner workings(the process of understanding). I enjoy how peaceful reality is, how satisfied it is with itself and how still it is. I enjoy its beauty. I love that it is not separate from 'me'. I enjoy the fact that I love reality so deeply and I am already in harmony in it, that my love for reality bears no pressure on me to harmonize with it, for I am already it. I enjoy reality. I don't think I dislike anything about it. Sure, parts of its design don't feel nice, and can also induce suffering, yet the design is so beautiful that I can excuse it all. I do not enjoy suffering, nor do I want to suffer, but I find it a beautiful phenomenon. Therefore, I wouldn't say I dislike it. When it comes to reality itself, I cannot think of anything I dislike about it. Maybe my definition of disliking or hating is too stretched out. I hate suffering when it's happening to me but when I am out of it, I excuse it quite easily.

+1

I can't tell you what to do but here's my experience. My younger sister is 11 years younger than me. I am basically her 3rd parent and love her a lot. The usual sibling quarrels is not there (mostly) because of our age gap. To be honest, I love it. I was an only child for 11 years so I have a considerable idea at what changed when I become a brother. I became more responsible and empathetic. If I was an only child I'd have matured slower imo. Also she's so cute, just makes me happier in general. Takes me out of my head, which I appreciate. I much prefer this than being an only child. During the first 2 years I did feel she got a lot more attention than I did, but I didn't feel bad because I knew that is what was required for a smaller child. When she said my name for the first time I felt soo good. There was never a reason to hate her even though my hormones were running wild at the time. Due to circumstances I had to raise her alone since I was 14 and still do (I am 19 in a month). There were a lot of difficult moments but I can tell you that the the thing I am most attached to in this world is her. I think you daughter would love a little sibling especially 'cuz she is sensitive. Personally, I was very locked emotionally and bad at expressing, my sister helped me experience a lot of love and kept me sane in times where I otherwise wouldn't have been able to.

proof?

I never had this problem, however I know a person who did. He used to cry really easily even if someone was being mean jokingly. What worked exceptionally well for him was taking Ashwagandha, I personally noticed a massive stability within him after some weeks. This was a few years ago and I have not talked to him since so I don't know how he is doing now or if he is still taking them. Lately I have seen it getting popular within fitness however the intended use for this herb is simply to help with hypersensitivity. I personally won't recommend any average person to take this as they will become emotionally numb maybe after a month or so. Edit: To be honest, your hypersensitivity seems to be more of an emotional problem than your nature, so I don't think you should take Ashwangandha then. Working on your emotions is probably the best

Completely agree with what you have pointed out. I also found such reactions as sheep-like.

I don't get much money each month and it's not regular or guaranteed. I don't have to pay my bills really but I do have to use the money to buy essentials of living. Even so, I spend my money everyday to buy things to eat. I spend so much on these things while I can just buy a ton of Vegetables (very cheap in india) and cook them on my own each day (I have the time). This would reduce my costs by 40%-60%. The problem is that I feel empty if I don't spend on a certain. By the end of the day, there's a massive urge to buy something to eat. I feel lonely if I don't spend on a particular day. I don't know how to fix this. This compulsion is genuinely eating into my money and even my savings right now. It's really hard, I stop for a while but then get back into it. I have the time but not the energy to cook food for myself, I just want to buy this cheap-in-short-term and unhealthy instant foods and get that dopamine hit. It's so shit for my health as well.