mandyjw

@themarkacosta Essentially all meditation is is focusing past the floaters. No need to even make it a practice if the thought of practice turns itself into another floater. You couldn't not do it, you're already seeing everything in your field of vision. Now just look for what you like and want to be seeing. ?

@themarkacosta I have this book, but there are free guided videos on youtube and elsewhere. https://www.amazon.com/Radiant-Rest-Relaxation-Awakened-Clarity/dp/B08TQRS529/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=yoga+nidra+radiant+rest&qid=1632243187&sr=8-1 You can also just start meditation lying down on your back and see if that helps in the meantime. As for eye floaters, I have them too. There's an important lesson there, if you pay very close attention you will notice that you must actually put in the effort to unfocus your eye to see the floaters at all. It happens naturally on wide light spaces like looking at the sky, so then our eye goes straight to focusing on them. However, once you realize that you can look beyond them and focus on what you're actually looking at, you will train your brain to focus on what you want to focus on. Soon it becomes effortless. What you're doing when you focus on eye floaters is you're actually focusing on a projection of something that's in your eyeball. Rather than looking at what you're actually seeing, you're staring at a little flawed piece of yourself. You do this by choice, though I fully appreciate how it doesn't seem that way at first. The allegory is quite flooring when it hits you.

Just one thought at a time, not even that really, it just seems that way. Like Abraham Hicks says "a belief is a thought that you keep thinking". So in that way, it seems like beliefs can be layers of thought, and that like branches thoughts can branch out from beliefs. Of course, this model of understanding would be another belief. Or we could believe in beliefs. It's delightfully frustrating, isn't it?

Yoga nidra!!!! Will solve both issues for you, and possibly many more.

You create the idea of special and mundane. Is that special? Or neither? If it was actually special in exclusion of the opposite of special, you wouldn't be able to create the idea of being special. But you can! Because you're neither special nor not special. special (adj.) c. 1200, "given or granted in unusual circumstances, exceptional;" also "specific" as opposed to general or common; from Old French special, especial "special, particular, unusual" (12c., Modern French spécial) and directly from Latin specialis "individual, particular" (source also of Spanish especial, Italian speziale), from species "appearance, kind, sort" (see species).

Wow, that's fascinating about the constant variables thing. I found an old truck in the woods and it has the word "Custom" on it. And I realized that "custom" means both to conform something to exactly what you want, and it also means " a country's customs, as in what's expected." So essentially the same word has two very opposite meanings, one is a limitation, one a freedom. it strikes me as similar to what you discovered. Good luck with the web development, exciting!

You experience what is meant by "the ego" when you're feeling not so great, when you're having resistance to a situation. "It" works against itself, all in the name or trying to force through or control what it thinks it wants. It secretly works in opposition to what it says it wants. There is no "it" of course, no such evil entity, you just know when you're doing it by how you feel. It's like being so anxious and suspicious of the people on the sidewalk that you jump out in front of a bus. It's really funny when you recognize what's going on. Here's another good example. Last week I had to call someone for some important information I needed. I have to meet with this person every year and the way she goes about doing things is very much opposite of how I prefer things to be done. She never answers the phone, so I left a message and she didn't call me back. I didn't want to talk to her. Neither did I want her to ignore my message. I realized the humor in the fact that I was screwed either way. Because of my resistance, there was no possible outcome that would please me. Except, when I observed this and recognized what I was doing, I found it so funny that essentially, what I thought of as "screwed either way" and what unconditional love is are the same. This minor situation gave me the gift of recognizing and understanding a pattern. Now rather than an annoyance that I was "screwed either way", it was the highlight of my week. Also, later she called later and was very nice and prompt with the information I needed.

Colors are colors on the most basic level because they reject a part of themselves. The potential of color is in colorless white light. The color red absorbs all wavelengths and frequencies of light and repels or emits the red wavelength of color we see. So red is actually everything BUT red. However, red only appears because of white, already whole light. No light, and red is not red anymore. Likewise the true light is not the light of the sun or other stars but the light of Awareness, and our consciousness is borrowed light from Awareness.

Even better than that, he's coming out with a book. Scroll to bottom. https://www.actualityofbeing.com/

Thought would say the origin is you, but you are a thought. So why would you use thought to find out about the origin of thought? That would be like trying a suspect and throwing out all other witnesses, evidence and only taking the suspect's word for what happened as truth. origin (n.) c. 1400, "ancestry, race," from Latin originem (nominative origo) "a rise, commencement, beginning, source; descent, lineage, birth," from stem of oriri "arise, rise, get up; appear above the horizon, become visible; be born, be descended, receive life;" figuratively "come forth, take origin, proceed, start" (of rivers, rumors, etc.), from PIE *heri- "to rise" (source also of Hittite arai- "to arise, lift, raise," Sanskrit iyarti "to set in motion, move," Armenian y-arnem "to rise"). Meaning "beginning of existence" is from 1560s; sense of "that from which something derives its being or nature" is from c. 1600. So in order for there to be an origin, in order for something to rise, it must rise up from below, or for it to come forth, it must come forth from something. Start, origin, ending, all is the realm of thought. I know I move, because my world stands still. I rise and climb the ladder, because the ground stays where it is. The origin is Self, being without end or beginning. Wouldn't take my word for it though. I'm still the suspect. It's like we're playing the game Clue, except I haven't got a clue. clue (n.) "anything that guides or directs in an intricate case," 1590s, a special use of a revised spelling of clew "a ball of thread or yarn" (q.v.). The word, which is native Germanic, in Middle English was clewe, also cleue; some words borrowed from Old French in -ue, -eu also were spelled -ew in Middle English, such as blew, imbew, but these later were reformed to -ue, and this process was extended to native words (hue, true, clue) which had ended in a vowel and -w. The spelling clue is first attested mid-15c. The sense shift is originally in reference to the clew of thread given by Ariadne to Theseus to use as a guide out of the Labyrinth in Greek mythology. The purely figurative sense of "that which points the way," without regard to labyrinths, is from 1620s. As something which a bewildered person does not have, by 1948. https://www.etymonline.com/search?q=clue Like a ball of yarn, I'm all spun up around myself. Unravel Me and you're left with nothing.

Sounds exhausting. Good luck with that.

Survival is a thought. The brain is a thought. Tricky, right? Watch and question the thought you're thinking in the moment, rather than believing in the entire structure, therefore taking the thought that the entire structure is legit, and the truth of the whole reveals itself. The survival of the belief, is dependent upon the belief that the self is what's surviving, not the belief. Funny, right? THAT'S the survival to concern yourself with.

We're simply meant to... be. Came here to write and my husband literally just then picks up the handle-less scissors off the floor and places them on my desk. I'm supposed to be cleaning. You are. Right. I feel slightly bleh. Like coming here stretches my attention a bit too far. I want people to act different. I feel slightly threatened or not good enough in reaction to the people I DO like, who act out of sheer brilliance sometimes. Can't fucking win. Fucked either way. I am UNPLEASEABLE. (Unconditionally loved.) Yeah, yeah. Love hurts. Love scars. Love wounds, and Mars. And Venus? Any heart. That is. Not strong. Enough. To take a lot of pain. Take a lot of pain. Love hurts. Oooooh love hurts. I'm young. I know. But eveeeeeen so. I know I think. I really learned a lot. Really learned a lot. Love is like a flame, It burns you when it's hot. Love hurts. Ooooh... love hurts. I'd make it so subtle, so subtle, so magnificent, so underlying, so overtaking, so everything, you wouldn't even know. I'm high, I'm fucking high. All the time, high. I don't know if I consented to this thinking stuff. You're funny. When did I consent? consent (v.) c. 1300, "agree, give assent; yield when one has the right, power, or will to oppose," from Old French consentir "agree; comply" (12c.) and directly from Latin consentire "agree, accord," literally "feel together," from assimilated form of com "with, together" (see con-) + sentire "to feel" (see sense (n.)). "Feeling together," hence, "agreeing, giving permission," a sense evolution that apparently took place in French before the word reached English. Related: Consented; consenting. You're fucking kidding me. What did you really imply, or assume when you asked about consenting to thinking? I was thinking on the basis that thought and feeling are separate. I am, more and more experiencing the alignment or these things, the consciousness that they are not separate, and therefore, my confusion between them, which was only possible BECAUSE they are not separate, leaves, quicker, and quicker and quicker. I have to stand up and say, this is too fucking good. Too spectacular. You took my breath away. Give it back. You gave it up. You take it back. You've breathed all your life, don't know how this works? I don't even know anymore, the more attention I give it the more I don't know. It makes me high. I'm high. High. I'm perpetually high. Take it. "I can't take it." TAKE it. Damn, damn, DAMN. I'd express my love and devotion for you, but you're just... We're simply meant to be.

Jesus from Nazareth couldn't get his point a cross. Maybe the band Nazereth has some wisdom? Nothing is more funny than a man who doesn't know how funny he is. Nothing is more romantic than a man who doesn't know how far fallen in love he is. Nothing is more brilliant than a man who realizes he doesn't know a fucking thing. Nothing is more funny than a man who thinks he knows what's up. There are no losers in this game. Even the heartbreak is iconic. Romantic. Created to heal. I'm young, I know, but even so I know a thing or two I learned from you I really learned a lot, really learned a lot I know a thing or two. Damn, good song though. "Love Hurts" sounds so good. I wanted to be a cheerleader when I was kid really bad. Then when I got old enough, people convinced me it was stupid. My senior year in highschool, I sort of regretted it all, and wished I'd done it. Now as an almost 33 year old lady, I realize I'm already an f-ing cheerleader. Source, whatever I want, however I want it, bam. It's yours. It's mine. If I don't get it, you've got a better idea. I got the whole world in my hands, because I don't have either of those things. My dog is chewing the scissors again, I meant to throw them away. He already chewed the handles off. How are you supposed to use scissors that don't have handles? I wanted to make a video about Edward scissor hands. A mind is a thing that separates. What demonizes is the demon. He is just an unfinished creation, that wants to create.

"I can't think" is a thought. HA!!!! Try running or walking, nothing gets contemplation going better than that. It's because most of the time you aren't actually trying to think and your mind is blank. It's a very ironic kind of magic, thought is. It needs space. Space is good. Also try this, think of a question you really want an answer to. Or even better, a thought you kind of want an answer to. Then drop it. Let the answer come to you when you least expect it. It turns out that the thought "I am the thinker" is a thought that takes up a TON of space, it doesn't allow space for the new thoughts we'd really like let in.

You only experience one thought at a time. So when you're meditating, you are becoming more aware of the thoughts that arise. It's not that the OCD is increasing during meditation, really, it's not that this is a negative thing. Again, those are just thoughts arising when they arise. Mediation is where we give ourselves an opportunity to see through the thoughts that we believe. I suffered with OCD quite badly as a kid and started distance running at around the same time. The OCD kicked in when I was running and had a quiet mind. I occasionally had the typical obsessive handwashing and intrusive thoughts, but I also got random impulses to do random things, for example, pick up a piece of trash, or go somewhere. However, so did creative and insightful thinking. My parents didn't address my issues, and didn't believe in unnecessary medical or psychological intervention. I knew I was crazy, but didn't want them to know so I put great efforts into hiding it which made myself even more miserable. I accidently stumbled upon the term OCD and that is when the jolting recognition of my issue had a stunning effect on me. Having a label for it somehow made me realize I was not alone, and gave me an overarching understanding of what was going on. I was empowered, relieved and I started letting go of the OCD impulses. It was my first in to realizing that my thoughts were total bullshit. The impulses would only occasionally return after I reached my teens, almost always when I was running, but I just noticed them and didn't act on them. Much later, as a result of spiritual teachings I learned that I was receiving thoughts, not thinking them. This heightened reception was also the very same venue intuition uses. As I started opening to intuition, the OCD came back. I realized that how I was feeling was a measure of my openness and what I was receiving. I realized the random impulses were not insanity but leading me straight to what I wanted, what I had previously asked for in some way. Abraham Hicks teachings and other synchronicities helped me understand this on a much deeper level. The law of attraction and the truth that you cannot focus on what you do not want and not get more of it, really explains the intrusive thoughts someone with OCD experiences. The magic of focusing on what you DO want and therefore in doing so letting go of the thought about what is not wanted becomes clear. The understanding of the nature of thought itself becomes clear, and empowers us to let go of thoughts. Essentially, OCD is actually a gift, but it's like a very large, misunderstood gift that takes up most of your living quarters. Dumb analogy, but say it's like someone gave you a kitchen table set but you've always eaten off the floor and hated it but never considered another possibility or seen a kitchen table, or seen one being used in your entire life. It's not until someone shows you what a kitchen table is for that you don't curse it. It's the same way with thought. People with OCD are strong thinkers. It almost forces a person into seeing through the illusion of thought. There really is no greater gift.

This word is one of my absolute favorite etymology surprises I've ever found. depression (n.) c. 1400 as a term in astronomy, "angular distance of a star below the horizon," from Old French depression (14c.) and directly from Medieval Latin depressionem (nominative depressio), noun of action from past participle stem of Latin deprimere "to press down, depress" (see depress). The literal sense "act of pressing down, state of being pressed down" is attested from 1650s. The meaning "dejection, state of sadness, a sinking of the spirits" is from early 15c. (as a clinical term in psychology, from 1905); meteorological sense is from 1881 (in reference to barometric pressure); meaning "a lowering or reduction in economic activity" was in use by 1826; given a specific application (with capital D-) by 1934 to the one that began worldwide in 1929. For "melancholy, depression" an Old English word was grevoushede. A melancholy leading to desperation, and known to theologians under the name of 'acedia,' was not uncommon in monasteries, and most of the recorded instances of medieval suicides in Catholicism were by monks. [Lecky, "History of European Morals"] https://www.etymonline.com/word/depression

My middle school teacher called me slaphappy once when she was annoyed that I wasn't trying hard enough on a project to glue things where they ought to go. I'd never heard it before and thought it was hilarious. So I'll pick that one. I'm not happy or any of those things. Nor are you really not happy either. Those feelings just seem to arise only because I'm not trying hard to be them.

Likewise, the nature of thought is that you are fucked either way. Last week I called a woman that I don't really like dealing with but needed some information from, left a message and she didn't call me back for a few days. I realized I didn't want to talk to her but also that I felt like I was being ignored because I needed the information, I realized because of my resistance, I was fucked either way. I had set myself up in a situation where I didn't actually want either possible outcome. Or... I could look at it, as since it was my resistance, either outcome was fine, and crazy though it seems the "fucked either way" perspective struck me as when looked at more generally, the same thing as unconditional love. When I realized this I laughed so hard for like 15 minutes straight, and my stomach hurt the next day from laughing so much. I realize that it's easier to see this with a more diffused situation. I had a negative feeling about this woman, but really it wasn't a very big deal and my intention was to see through it. I was already amused by my reaction to the situation. But even with things that ARE a really big deal to us, like trying to attract a partner, the same is true. It's just harder to recognize. You really are, already, perfect as you are.

Ever thought how funny it is that people strive so hard to be normal but no one wants to be average? But normal and average mean the same thing?

Humanity has widely gone on the misunderstanding that things, circumstances, people and events bring them (the separate self) happiness and security. This misunderstanding has lead to a epidemic of unfulfillment and a need to secure things. This creates the suffering of greed. If we apply this same misunderstanding on a wider scale to the problem of climate change, we change nothing and then our own impotence becomes incredibly frustrating. We may try to control and enforce others to comply. We may sacrifice human health, life and happiness for the earth and turn it into a war, where it's earth against humans, forgetting we ourselves are never separate from earth or humanity. What will truly transform our environment is the transformation of ourselves, because it is a reflection of us. No inner, no outer. What will truly transform our environment is love for it, and love for ourselves, knowing that love knows no inner, no outer. We believe that the world was here before us, not realizing that our knowledge of the world came only after the knowledge that we are. The very essence of being and knowing is love. That's why shame, blame, remorse, control, and despair will never ever heal the environment. It's what created the need to have the bigger, better, best and the following lack of fulfillment when it was obtained.

@Late Boomer? ❤

I understand, I'm just pointing out that on a very basic level your scale works because it has a beginning and an end. And so the notion of death works the same way. Do you remember at what point you began? Do you remember your beginning?

It was a big mind F to me, that you cannot combine anything unless it's first already separate. Also that one implies a border around what's not one. But there are no borders, and no separation. So if you're trying to combine something that you mistakenly think is separate through effort, it ends up being a funny situation.