Karmadhi

You are not attracted to bad boys for what it seem. A bad boy would not be so kind to you at your lowest point, he would not give a single shit about you if he would not fuck you. You confuse the motorcycle smoking tattoo guy with the bad boy. Bad boy is the charming confident charismatic guy that does not give a single shit about you and uses you as a sex toy. The person you mentioned does not seem like this. Also those kind of nice guys you talk about are pieces of shit and you should not get attracted to them for your own good. Aim to get kind confident honest man, not nice guys. Nice guys can fuck you up badly too. The issue is that a lot of girls (not saying you) are not attracted to real. They are attracted to fun and charming. If you are attracted to real then you will never have issues with the opposite sex again because you know from the start what you are getting into.

@Leo Gura Honestly i would recommend you to shoot a very long detailed video talking about these dating stuff on purpose, tackling it from every pov ever so these gender wars can ease down. I am surprised how you have the nerve to still keep replying to the same comments (including mine, i am also guilty here).

@Derek White Kind caring sweet honest sexual submissive girly soft nurturing independent passionate intellectual fit and looks at you as a king. Just my taste

@Hardkill That is a one way ticket to get blocked by her, if she really is into you she will be hurt and think of you as a asshole player. I feel like this advice you are giving me works for very hot, very desired girls that have 20 simps texting them all the time. I am not talking about these girls , i am talking about pretty but not super hot/popular girls. Maybe you are right guys, idk honestly. I will just not talk about it and if they bring it up i will just brush it off and tell them how amazing and great they are (if it is manipulation then so be it). Once we sleep together or she wants to be with me or is really really into me then i might make her my only one. Problem solved.

Some do but personally that is a huge red flag and i would suggest you try to avoid such people, whether be girlfriends or friends. You do not need such toxic low conscious people in your life.

@Leo Gura I appreciate the long advice but there are a few things i should clarify. 1. I am 22 year old and therefore i will date girls 19-21 for the most part (with exceptions ofc). A 20 year old girl does not have the sexual experience and mindset of "only caring for a guy until i sleep with him". I know A LOT of girls that started to have legit feelings for a guy and got devastated when things didn't turn out well BEFORE she slept with him. A lot of girls will not even have sex before being in a relationship, to them kissing is the equivalent of "we are not friends maybe we should get exclusive". Keep in mind we are talking about european girls here, they are not as sexual and wild as american girls. I heavily agree with the idea of not getting too invested before she gets invested in you also. I did it in the past and it hurt like HELL after. 2. Of course you will not be a needy bitch but imagine you go on a few dates with a girl (before sex but maybe kissing) and she asks you whether you are dating anyone else. What are you supposed to say? If you choose not to reveal anything then she will just assume you are dating others and will get hurt and stuff like that. So my question is simply: How would you recommend me to handle such situations, where this stuff gets brought up.

@Gili Trawangan Multiple women for first and maybe second dates, even sex. But to grow close and develop feelings only 1girl.

I never said weak, just empathetic honest and kind. I do not support nice guy syndrome and being a wimp, but kindness honesty and empathy should be given more importance. And why are you calling me self biased? I said BOTH sexes should give more importance to kindness and empathy and honesty. The male equivalent is caring less about female looks once she reaches a certain threshold. The idea here is about thresholds. A girl that you think is a 2/10 of course will not do, just like a super weak simp will not do. Once a certain level of these things is reached, other things are given more importance. Just like once a certain level of income is reached other things like job satisfaction, inter personal relationships etc are given more importance than pure money. Nuance. I have made very self baised posts in the past but here i am really trying to be equally harsh on both sexes. What would be self biased is if i just focused on the females and ignored males which i clearly did not do. I addressed both of them.

@Preety_India I believe so too. Why would you say all dating coaches and advice including Leo support the idea?

Do you guys have advice for me to learn French? Currently i am taking 2 times per week french classes (5 hours in week total) also i am doing a bit of french in university. Currently i am doing B1 and would like to advance faster. What guidelines would you give me? Would highly appreciate it,

@Peter Miklis I was saying that most dating issues are self created and people tend to complain about them instead of understanding they are somewhat choosing to be in pain indirectly via improper dating choices. I think people should be very selective on who they choose to emotionally invest into and things like kindness, honesty, good communication and maturity should be very very important, just as important as looks (for girls) , charisma, confidence (for guys). If you ignore the quality aspects and pick people based purely on the more "sexy" aspects that are not correlated with healthy relationships then you have problems. Basically what i am saying is this: I will not date a person that is not mature, kind, honest and good communicator regardless of his other attributes. This mindset would do wonders. Personally i am not affected by this, i have never been hurt by a "hot but shitty personality" girl. I was just talking about the phenomena in general

@Preety_India I am not saying to have sex with someone that you have 0 connection with. Just find a good balance. No need for a guy to go for a 9/10 in looks when a 6/10 is more than enough for him look wise, then focus on personality. A 6/10 looks in a healthy relationship is better for you than a 9/10 with meh personality. Same logic for girls choosing guys guys but you replace pure looks with those stuff like charisma, charm, confidence etc. It is all about balance. So in your case date an introvert that makes a good boyfriend instead of dating the asshole extrovert, as long as you enjoy the introvert company and you are attracted to him. Of course the feeling will be less strong but the price you pay for that temporary emotional high is not worth it. Same logic for guys. I hope i am making myself clear

@Leo Gura Scary how women punish this stuff more than abuse and being treated like complete shit. Human nature is really scary and disgusting sometimes. Personally i have no more empathy for people that get hurt by the other gender (guys and girls alike) considering how fucked up, unhealthy and backwards the things they are attracted to are for today 's world. Everyone creating their own problems. Girls complaining they cannot get x guy when they have 10 nice kind guys at their fingertips but choose to ignore them because they are soft. Guys who can easily be with kind caring but average looking girls but instead focus on getting hot girls even though those specific girls might have bitchy spoiled attitudes. I personally think sweet kindness and being caring in a girl is VERY attractive and also healthy for you but most guys do not think like this, they mostly want looks, kindness comes second. Same with girls, what they are attracted to is the opposite of what is healthy and ends up destroying them in the end, just like junk food or heroin does. I think it would be nice if people tried to focus more on the healthy side of attraction rather than just going for pure emotions and pleasure. Yes those people may be less appealing but you can have a healthy good relationship with them. People that eat salads instead of burgers do not get the same taste hedonistic satisfaction but in the long run they are much better off and happier. Same logic here. Am i asking for too much here?

@Leo Gura As a beginner you can also talk to normal girls. Hot girls are intimidating as fuck at first so you can practice talking to normal girls which the streets are good for. Drop your ego while practicing and learning. You can even date and fuck normal looking girls if you are a noob.

@Roy Why are you being so harsh with him though? His question made logical sense to ask

I might be wrong but it is because normally sex=pregnancy=kid. So if a girl has sex very fast it means that she would possibly become a mother and the father might not be a good fit to take care of the family =they die. Imagine if you can only buy 1 car all your life, you would not be very willing to buy one fast, it would take a long time for you to get convinced. Guys can buy 1 car every day so they give little shits about the car itself. This is just nature stuff, of course there are exceptions and stuff, just the general logic is like this and it makes sense.

So i found this article and i was like wtf. Apparently "women need to be turned on and all they care about is emotional stimulation and confidence and stuff". Well apparently girls are as willing to randomly fuck as guys are, no need to slowly turn them on. There is a catch: you have to be good looking. I did not know girls cared about looks at the point where they would randomly fuck a stranger just from looks. I thought only guys were like that. Oh well! https://www.boredpanda.com/social-experiment-guy-created-fake-tinder-profile-hot-model-pictures-germanlifter/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=organic

@Space It just pisses me off when girls complain about guys treating them badly when they choose the guys exactly based on traits that in the long run will cause them to treat them badly. I already said it. High assertiveness, dominance, edginess, slickness, and silver tongue wittiness should be red flags. Remove people with these characteristics from your dating life and you will never have issues with being abused, cheated, manipulated again. Just find a confident funny guy with normal social skills, no need for a pussy magnet. Then focus on other stuff like intelligence, honesty, kindness etc. I also advice my guy friends not to go for a super super hot girl because those tend to be pain in the ass to deal with. Just find a cute girl that is smart funny cool and honest, sweet. Both genders are creating their own problems here.

@Space I love how you make it like relationship abuse and being dumped is a female only issue. 75 percent of divorces are filed by females and in general it is not at all a gender related issue. Both sexes dump, manipulate, cheat, abuse and fuck over each other. The things you say are just as much of a guy issue as of a girl issue. Secondly try to screen for traits like dominance, assertiveness and stuff like that. If a guy is very assertive and dominant do not get with him. Try to find a respectful guy that treats you equally and does not act all macho and stuff. 1-2 dates are all you need to see that. Also try not to date those slick, silver tongue guys that give salesmen vibes and are all smooth and shit. Just these two filters will remove you most asshole players.

@Preety_India Girls care about charisma, guys care about looks. It's all in the game yo. Both equally fucked up. @Striving for more I love how you say in any way that girls have dating easier the whole forum freaks out without ever explaining why exactly. Better stop saying it because you will not get positive responses nor an explanation. @ertopoliceGo out in bars and clubs, dress well so you look good and wait for guys to hit on you. If they do not actively do it then just start locking eyes with those you find nice or are looking at you. Then smile at them. It is really easy tbh. If it is a dance floor start dancing with someone and they will after try to initiate a conversation. You do not even need dating apps.

@Leo Gura I do not even use Tinder personally. I am just stating simple facts. Online dating has increased in popularity and will continue to do so. It is the byproduct of advancement of technology. Like it or dislike it is is the future. The number of couples that met online has increased every year and will continue to do so. It may be in principle a quick rich scheme but it has managed to slowly become one of the most popular methods to date. I may choose not to use it personally but it will not change the fact that it is the future. Therefore it needs to be regulated. If you do not regulate it it will create problems just like not regulating any sort of market creates problem. I am sure pyramid schemes and other stupid get quick rich schemes are not even allowed yet alone regulated. You cannot be a libertarian for this stuff anymore than for other markets. You heavily advocate pick up, and meeting people in person and I highly agree and support those notions. However the future is online dating more and more as the involvement of people in technology increases. Therefore some regulation is needed otherwise the results will not be pleasant. You said that getting rid of social security would create a world full of homeless people that are too foolish and irresponsible to save some money during their working lives and that is horrible. The government should take care and support them even though they are technically being foolish. Well i do not think a world full of frustrated teenagers that cannot get laid because they are too foolish to approach 1000 girls is any better, i do not think a place with angry misogynistic self biased people that do mass shootings is any better. So some basic government regulation is needed. It can be done in a way to reduce the problem while allowing higher value people to more successful just like our markets today allow people to still become millionaires while keeping some basic safety net for the poor, especially this is the case in Western European countries. I am not saying to regulate basic gender dynamics, just online dating which does not play fair, just plays for basic stage orange profit. In the real world things can go as usual.

@Leo Gura He never said quality sex. He said no matches, that' it. Do not make assumptions regarding whether he wanted sex from anyone or sex from a hot girl. Plus online dating these days has become the most popular way to meet partners unfortunately, you cannot treat it with such a basic black and white thinking. Where is the nuance? It is not like he was not trying you know. Half the fucking in the world these days is done by pressing a few buttons. It is no longer a weird side off thing that only lazy nerds did. Now it is more normal to use Tinder than meet a girl in a club, that is how popular it has become. It needs serious attention otherwise we will have dozens of mass shootings done by frustrated people that cannot get laid

@integral Yeah stop crying to government for regulations, learn the market and compete with the big monopolies. Free markets for everyone. Notice the double standards here, market regulations are ok. Online dating regulations are not. Why so? They are both equally ruthless and will screw up most people

@Phyllis Wagner I think he has a bias against online dating and treats it as a sub par thing without giving it the same nuanced care that he does for most topic.

@Bryanbrax Stage Orange corporations destroying people self esteems and doing crazy collateral damage. Would be good if governments banned these types of apps. It would encourage people to actually meet people in real life more. Women these days do not even try to meet guys they can just do it online. Same logic for guys.