no_name

Lol, yea no way… I’ve been unsuccessfully looking for Holotropic breath work sessions for 2 years now.. and I live in a major city and willing to travel to another city. People here feel so empty, I sometimes think they will soon be needing an instructions manual on how to cross the road. Green values are mainstream here, but people follow green values not because they genuinely care, but because they want to be accepted, and blindly follow. It feels like stage orange commercialized green. People don’t seem genuine.

@soos_mite_ah I also think you’re not exercising enough, should be totally possible to get rid of the stomach if you’re doing exercise consistently for a few weeks. You also need to switch things up. Have you ever tried fitness classes? What fitness classes are available next to you?

@Adodd Is there a difference between culinary and ceremonial matcha?

The fact that you see yourself in a mirror when you workout and you can see whether you’re flexing your abs or not when you’re wearing a sports bra, it makes you “extra flex”. Duhhh ?

You don’t do the same exercise every day for 5-7 days. Plus the way most people exercise looks like a nap anyways, so I don’t know what exactly they are “recovering” from.

@soos_mite_ah if most of your day work/school is sedentary though, working out 3-4 days a week is not enough. You should aim to work out every day for at least an hour (walks don’t count). Try doing 5-10K runs (outside) 5-7 days a week and you will be shocked how fast your belly fat disappears if you’re consistent. Workout in a sports bra so you train yourself to flex your belly muscles all the time. Walk straight and keep your belly muscles flexed/belly sucked in throughout the day. Try fitness classes as well, some of them can be so much fun you will forget you are working out whatsoever.

I think this is especially important. Instagram makes me go from “hey, there, gorgeous piece of art” to “what’s up you ugly broke Shrek” within a matter of hours. Also, what kind of workouts do you do?

That’s because women are embarrassed to talk about these things and often even think it’s their fault. That being said, if they truly cared about their friend, they should have told her.

If there is no bicycle lane on the road, why are cyclists still allowed to go on it? If cars are driving at 50-60 km per hour and a cyclist is driving at 15-20 km per hour, is the traffic supposed to slow down all the way behind him? If there is no bicycle lane, a car and a cyclist with his fat a*s can’t fit into one lane, so the only choice is to go around him and bypass him going to another lane which is very dangerous or drive slowly behind him. This is especially bad during busy hours. Also, car drivers need to pass driving exams and have a valid drivers licence to be on the road and can get tickets. Why aren’t cyclists on the road treated the same way?

I don’t know if I can explain this well, and this may sound very crazy and weird, but I really need help to understand this. Whenever I listen to music, I always think about other people. For example, when an EDM song comes up, I would think about working out and posting a fit video (or a makeup video) on Instagram so that some (usually a guy I like) people could see how good I look. Or I think about how good I would like wearing this or that when someone sees me. Or how smart I would look at a work meeting once I do this or that project. Or how wise I would sound when I talk about this book I read/video I saw etc. Just now I was listening to a Harry Potter theme song sitting on my balcony, and the sky looks beautiful here.. yet I start thinking about other people instead of enjoying the moment with me. Listening to music always makes me think how I would impress these other people. I was thinking of quitting listening to music forever because of this. I don’t want to care about impressing other people, I only want to live a life for me. Or is it burning though karma thing (I didn’t actually watch Leo’s video on that, but I assume that’s what it is)? Should I just go with that and live my life trying to impress people for some time? I just think it’s so unhealthy and I really want to connect with me.

The reason why this law is exists is not for the driver that is driving slow, if I drive at 20 km/h, I am not in danger, it’s the car that is driving at 60 km/h that needs to maneuver to adjust to my speed.

A car driver would get a ticket if he was to drive 20 km/h on a 60 km/h road, due to blocking or impeding the normal flow of traffic. One of the most dangerous things on the road is differences in speed. Why are the rules different for cyclists?

I think so too, plus the sidewalks are usually empty anyways, unless you’re in downtown

Loooool, this doesn’t work ?, I was hopeful for a few seconds of it, but then those sounds reminded me of puss in boots sword fighting scene and how badass he looked and how badass I can look too ? (I am not making this up ?)

What a bunch of bullshit. When I was 22 the quality of my relationships was at least 100 times worse. There was more quantity because there was no filter whatsoever.. nowadays I wouldn’t even spare a hello to the losers I dated.

But then what ends up happening is that high quality conscious men are pretty rare. Combine that with other people (including men you date) telling you you’re too picky and demanding, what you’re screening for are “shallow things”, or that you’re searching for red flags on purpose, a few negative experiences and you end up settling for a guy who is “not too bad” yet still pretty unhealthy. Kind of like what’s better a sparrow in your hand or a crane bird in the sky? So you need to be able to stand your ground and be firm on what you want and keep believing it will show up or settle for less. If you go for the first option, it does require a strong character, I guess there’s no other choice but not to listen to what anyone else says but only trust yourself, but then how do you grow. I guess you really need to only listen to people who have done amazing things in life and absolutely tune out everyone else. The problem is that dumbest people are the loudest (even on this forum, I mean that’s why I keep asking how old people are because you have 20 year old kids super arrogant and opinionated here talking down to you as if they got it all figured out). But I guess this is all mental masturbation. There is no shortcut to healthy relationship it’s all about developing yourself.

I agree, you need to be detached. That is why I don’t think it’s a good idea to get intimate with guys too fast because it will cloud your judgment. Also, not invest too much time into a guy during the “get to know him phase” to remain detached. Lead the date and treat it as an interview, learn to ask good questions. What kind of questions do you ask? How did you develop the skill to asses someone? I think oftentimes I lack discipline and break my own rules, I have solid theories, but fail to commit to them in practice. And if I don’t respect my own rules, then how can I expect others people to respect them? It all starts with how I treat myself myself.

But I guilt trip too. How can I expect others not to do it if I do it myself? That would be hypocrisy. I don’t do it on purpose, although sometimes I might, but because it’s a behaviour I learned from my family/culture. I do try to “play” clean though, but I am not always successful.

How old are you?

Could you please give specific examples of emotional stimulation? I see you using that word a lot, I have an idea of what it means, but I would like to get a concrete definition.

Can you please share where you moved from and to? (You can dm me instead if you don’t feel comfortable sharing here). I am considering moving too, for various reasons, but not sure if my city is bad for finding people to begin with.

We are on a self development forum though, I think most women here are willing/are already questioning their own motives and self biases. I just truly don’t understand what Leo meant by “shallow behaviour reasons”. Perhaps I have done it, perhaps not, I can’t say without having some examples of it. But I see what you mean, sometimes there is a whole zoo of things wrong with the guy, and a woman will get a general bad vibe, while naming 1-2 random things.

I am planning on doing my first ceremony too, however, I am scared of throwing up. How was it for you? What was your diet like pre-ceremony?

Yea, that’s true in my experience. Healthy relationships start off “calm” and build over time. I am just not too sure what you mean by “shallow behaviour reasons” then.

Sorry I still don’t get it. Could you give some examples of shallow behavioural reasons? You mean if he is not very confident/alpha male/doesn’t know how to sweep you off your feet kind of stuff?